Title: This Time It'll Be Different
Author: alakewood
Warnings: Spoilers for Jump the Shark and Pilot.
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1300+
Summary: January 2003. John Winchester receives a phone call from a long-forgotten woman from his past. A glimpse into how John may have met his youngest son.
Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing.
oxoxo
John had just dropped Dean off at Bobby's after having picked him up in St. Louis the day before. His oldest son had been hunting solo since Sam had abandoned them for Stanford, but the transmission had finally dropped out of the car Dean had boosted and he was forced to call his father for help. So Dean was left under Bobby's tutelage to learn all the things about auto mechanics that John had never had the time to teach him.
With Sioux Falls nearly three hours behind him, John had stopped just outside Rapid City for gas and coffee, and barely returned to the Impala in time to answer his ringing cell phone on the passenger's seat. He leaned across the bench seat for the phone, thumbing the 'Send' button before looking at the screen. "Hello?"
"Hi. John?" The woman's voice on the other end of the line sounded uncertain. "John Winchester?"
"Yes?"
"It's Kate. Milligan. From Windom, Minnesota," she said, pauses awkward and stilted. "I don't- don't know if you remember, but...we met thirteen years ago."
Each hunt he'd been on for the past nineteen years blurs into the next, most of them indistinguishable from each other, so some random job in Minnesota over ten years back didn't quite ring a bell.
"You were on a job," she said to his silence. "I was working in the ER; you were in pretty bad condition."
Fleeting memories returned then. A case involving a ghoul and dozens of desecrated bodies in a small cemetery. A woman that reminded him of his dead wife. He'd been so lonely. He'd spent the night with her. "Kate." He hadn't thought of her since he left her behind, a living casualty in the wake of a hunt. "Yeah, I remember."
"You're probably wondering why I'm calling after so long – I should've called years ago, but I- ...I couldn't bring myself to. John, I- we...we have a son."
The words hung heavy on the line, a suffocating weight in the silence that was interrupted by static and Kate's voice when the seconds stretched on too long.
"John, did you – are you still there?"
"Yeah, I'm – a son?"
"Adam," she said, her smile evident in her voice. "He's twelve. Asks about you all the time."
"Adam," John repeated, testing the name. A son. Still just a boy. "He- Can- could I..."
"I think he'd like to meet you," Kate cut in, "if that- if that's what you're trying to ask."
"Yeah. If, I mean, if...I could."
"Of course."
oxo
John drove nearly six hours straight, steering wheel in a white-knuckle grip the whole way, thinking about what Kate had told him and still, somehow, unable to comprehend the fact that he had another son by the time he'd pulled into the driveway of the Milligan's house just after two-thirty.
He remained in the car, suddenly uncertain as to whether or not he was doing the right thing. A tap on his window startled him out of his racing thoughts. He glanced up, seeing Kate bundled in a dark coat through the film of condensation on the inside of the glass. She smiled at him encouragingly. John pulled the keys out of the ignitions and shoved them into his jacket pocket and unbuckled his seatbelt.
"Come on inside. I just started a pot of coffee," Kate told him, backing away from the door to let him out.
John followed, gently closing the front door against the chill of January air. He accepted the mug of coffee Kate offered him and took a seat across from her at the kitchen table. There were pictures on the fridge, most of a young boy with dark blonde hair half-covering his eyes, his smile not much more than a smirk. John knew with certainty that it was Adam, seeing both Sam and Dean in the face of the boy in the photos. "So...how have you been?"
Kate shrugged a shoulder, hugging her sweater tighter around herself as she leaned forward. "Good. The single-parent thing is hard, but Adam's a really good kid, makes it easier for me. Work is stressful, but I love it. Things are good. What about you?"
John had the distinct urge to lie, but realized that, with Adam – and Kate – things could be different. His search for Mary's killer had put such a rift between him and Sam and Dean that he didn't want to make the same mistakes with Adam, and he knew that honesty, with Kate at least, would help to ensure that he could still remain part of Adam's life. "Things have been better," he said. "I've got two boys – Sam and Dean – but I haven't talked to Sam in almost two years."
"Why's that?"
John shook his head. "He wanted out, abandoned me and his brother to pursue a normal life. After the things we've been through, it's impossible to go back to normal." He set his mug on the table. "I don't want this for Adam, I want to make sure he has nothing to do with the kind of life Sam and Dean had."
"I appreciate that," Kate said. "But, let's be completely honest here, John. You've got your job. You're not going to be around much, and I understand that. Really, I do. But that you're here and that you want to be a part of Adam's life means a lot. I couldn't ask for more than that."
The front door opened and closed. "Mom?"
"Speaking of Adam." Kate pushed her chair back from the table and stood. "In here, honey."
"Whose car's in the...driveway?" Adam unceremoniously dropped his backpack just inside the dining room doorway, his gaze falling on John. "Hi?"
"Hi," John replied dumbly.
"Adam, this is John Winchester. He's-"
"My dad? Right?" Adam turned his attention to John. "You're my dad?"
"Yeah," John nodded. "I'm your dad."
oxo
Adam had convinced John into staying for dinner, and Kate had been more than happy to set another place at the table after watching John helping Adam with his science homework. "I'm doing a project on the black mambo snake," Adam said.
"You mean black mamba, right?" John asked, sharing a glance with Kate.
Kate had laughed and returned to preparing dinner.
"So...how long are you going to be around?" Adam questioned, shoving his school books back into his bag.
"I don't know. I'd like to stay around for a while, but-"
"He's got a job he's gotta get back to, Adam," Kate interrupted.
"I could stick around for a week. I'm always just a phone call away, though."
"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow, then?" Adam slung his bag over his shoulder and headed for the dining room door.
"Sure. Absolutely."
"Okay. Cool. Goodnight. Night, Mom. Love you."
"Love you, too." She watched Adam disappear, watched as his gaze lingered on his father until he was no longer in sight as though John might vanish if he glanced away.
"I want things to be different," John told Kate again as he was leaving. "I want to do for Adam what I couldn't for Sam and Dean."
"You will," she said, leaning against the door. "And thank you for wanting to try."
"Goodnight, Kate."
"Night, John. See you tomorrow."
When John returned to his car, he had a missed call from Dean. "Hey, Dad. It's just me. Just got back from a hunt with Bobby, wondering if you'd made it to Guernsey yet. Looking for another job. Call me when you get this."
John recalled the last hunt he and Dean had been on together, remembered the thirteen stitches it took to sew a long gash on Dean's side shut.
Adam would have the life he hadn't been able to give Sam or Dean. Adam would have a life. If it was the only thing John could ever do for him.