I have been needing some XemSai fluffiness for three days now and with this I will finally get it off my chest… hopefully!
Summary: Xemnas and Saïx discuss their past lives as Xehanort and Isa. Short, kinda fluffy one-shot.
KH – KH
Dear Journal, (because Saïx does not want to call it a diary)
I am currently sitting on the windowsill in my room, looking up at Kingdom Hearts. For some strange reason, I have been thinking about my past life as Isa a lot lately. I think about it sometimes, just as I'm sure the others do with their past lives, but for the past couple days memories seemed to have been constantly coming at me.
I remember who I was and really what I was and how I became a nobody. It happened like this: I was wolf demon from Halloween Town when I ran into Ansem and his apprentice, Xehanort (who is now Xemnas). They asked if I wanted to participate in some sort of experiment that they were doing. I agreed and they brought me to some sort of lab, but they did not do the experiment right away. I remember that I stayed with them for about a month before they actually did the experiment. When they did it though, something happened to change Isa from a human to a heartless and a nobody (me).
During that month that I spent with them before the experiment, I remember falling in love with Xehanort. I never told him (or Xemnas) because I was afraid of what would happen. I know that I don't have feelings since I don't have a heart to feel with, but I know that I love Xemnas. I know the feelings are just echoes of feelings from the past, but either way I know that I love him.
That is all for now,
Saïx
Saïx put the pen down and sighed as he closed his journal. Saïx looked back up at Kingdom Hearts and frowned.
"Why can't you just be finished already?" He asked it.
"Maybe that's because it doesn't have enough hearts yet." Someone said from behind Saïx and he knew that voice anywhere.
"Oh… Superior, I didn't hear you come in. …Is there something I can help you with?"
"Yes. Actually there is."
"What is it?" Saïx asked.
Xemnas went over to Saïx and sat on the windowsill next to him. "Saïx, lately I have been having a lot of memories come back to me from my time as Xehanort and I was wondering if you might know why."
"Um… no, I don't. I'm sorry."
"It's fine." Xemnas said as he stood up again. "Well, I guess I'll be going then." He said and started walking towards the door.
"The same thing has been happening to me." Saïx said.
At that, Xemnas stopped dead in his tracks and he looked back over his shoulder at him. "Really? You've been remembering your time as Isa?"
"I have, sir." Saïx said. "I'm not just remembering Isa, but I'm remembering emotions and what they feel like."
Xemnas turned so that he was facing Saïx again and asked, "What kind of emotions?"
"All kinds. Sadness, anger, frustration, confusion, happiness… even love."
Xemnas was really starting to get interested now. "Who did you feel love for as Isa?"
"I don't want to tell you."
"Why not?"
"Because if you knew, you'd hate me."
"Saïx, I could never hate you… even if I could feel hate, it would never be directed at you."
"If you really want to know… as Isa, I loved…" Saïx said and mumbled the name.
"Who?"
Saïx mumbled again.
"I can't hear you, Saïx. Speak up."
"Xehanort!"
"…Really?"
"Yes, and I know that you probably think of me as a freak now."
"No, I don't. I never have, and I know that I never will." Xemnas said. "There's just one thing I need to know."
"What's that?"
"Do you love me like Isa loved Xehanort, or has time changed things?"
"…I can't lie to you, Superior, I do feel something. I mean… we don't have emotions, but I feel an echo of love around you."
Xemnas let what Saïx said sink in before walking over and kneeling down in front of him. "Saïx, can I tell you something?"
"Yes."
"I know for a fact that Xehanort loved Isa back and not even becoming a nobody without emotions can change that."
"You mean that you–" Saïx started, but was cut off by Xemnas' hand over his mouth.
"Yes. I love you too, Saïx. It may be just echoes of love, but it's the thought that counts." Xemnas answered and brought his hand down from Saïx's mouth so he could claim his lips in a kiss.
Saïx closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around Xemnas' neck, pulling him closer. Saïx then broke the kiss and said, "Is this a dream?"
"Not that I know of. Why?"
"Because I want this to be so much more than a dream."
"It is… trust me." Xemnas said and kissed Saïx again.
KH – KH
…Okay! I am really sorry if this kinda sucks, but like I said… I needed XemSai fluff! I may add another chapter, but only if you people think it's good enough!
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