Chapter 1 Always Her
Jac Naylor rolled up the sleeves of her shirt and took a deep breath in. Today was going to another day where she would see him with her, a thought that nearly made her physically sick. She shouldn't care; the ice queen should not have feelings but somehow Joseph Byrne had wormed himself in to her heart. She knew she had blown it with him but she had thought that telling him how she felt would have changed things but like normal he had gone for the easy option, Faye, Faye who wouldn't hurt him, who wasn't ever going to hurt him, who was the complete opposite of her. She still clung to the words that he had uttered in the lockdown 'It's instinctive to protect people you care about' and 'Do I care for you? Do you really need to ask that?' maybe he still cared about her. 'I feel love for you' she had said, not quite I love you but close enough. She had finally found the words to say how she felt, she had given him her heart and he had rejected her in favour of Nurse Morton. That had hurt but it was to be expected. She had hurt him, so much, but not a day went by when Jac did not think about what she had done, about what could of happened if she had not been so career driven. How she regretted it.
Joseph always picked Faye. After they slept together it was Faye, though Jac didn't think he would have chosen her after she got him drunk and slept with him when he was at his lowest ebb. She hadn't meant the evening to end that way, it just did. She still felt there was a chance, a glimpse that he might have forgiven her after that night but she had just ended up more hated, the villain. She had let him believe what he had wanted, that she was pregnant because it was easier, because then she still had a hold over him, and she was always the villain. Then in the lockdown he had chosen Faye and that time it really hurt, but then again it was to be expected. All those she loved either hurt her or left her or both.
Jac loved Joseph, she had tried, unsuccessfully to move on from him, get on with her life but she always knew she wouldn't, she couldn't, she loved him too much for that. She always would love him and she had accepted the fact. If his love could survive all that had gone before, maybe, just maybe, there was a chance, however slim, that he would forgive her and let her back into his life. Maybe, just maybe.