Engaged
She is fine. I kept chanting in my head. It has been weeks since Victoria's demise and Bella and I's agreement, but time surly has not made me less paranoid. Emmett and Jasper have on more then one occasion suggested I constentrate on our hunting expedition.
How could it only be Saturday? If felt as if we left a week ago. However, my thirst informed me that I had not hunted for quite some time.
Jasper and Emmett were trying to keep up with me as we assended the side of the mountain. I sniffed the air on this overcast day, finally smelling the air for what we came for. I slowed to a jog and gradually discontinued my forward movement.
"What is the hurry?" Emmett asked. I did not feel that question needed a direct answer from me.
"The hurry has brown eyes, brown hair and smells extra delicious." Jasper wisecracked as he glanced down the mountain's face.
"And lips, blood and a very nice-" Emmett resumed.
"Say that out loud you will be limping home." I threatened.
"You've already heard it in my head so what does it matter?" Emmett chuckled.
"Can we just get some food? I happen to be famished." Jasper intrurupted our arguement.
"You are always famished." Emmentt pointed out. A light breeze blew in from the east and brought two distinct smells to our nostroles.
"Which do you want Edward?" Jasper inquired. Not the deer. Not the deer.
Emmett's mind repeated.
"I'll take the..." Stop tourchering me and choose. Emmett thought. "moutain lion."
"Yes" Emmett whispered and took off further up the mountain.
Meet you back here at dark. Jasper thought, before he trailed off after Emmett.
The sent of the mountain lion was advancing from the east. I slid off my jacket and rolled up my sleeves. At this point I inhaled once again and bolted after the smell. It was not hard to find where the lion was reciding. I crouched down to see if the lion was going to be volitiale. The over grown cat veered and hissed loudly at me. I began to stalk around it's terretory which caused a huge paw to be swipped at my face. I jumped backward to avoid getting scrached. The lion retracted onto his hind legs to show his full height. I rolled to the side over my shoulder as the cat tried to pounce on me. As I layed on my back the lion aimed for my throat, this was his fatal mistake. Once he was near enough to my left hand I halled him over my body and bit hard into his shoulder. As he tried to leap away I kicked his hind legs out from under it's body and dug my teeth into its throat. At first I only tasted the animal's fur then the blood. However, after tasting Bella's blood everything else tastes bland and unfullfilling, but of course no one needed to know that but me. The warm sustance that kept my thirst at bay began flowing freely into my body. Through out this operation, the lion began to thrash less and less until it became limp above me. The process was quick, less then five minutes, because I never want to cause anything to suffer.
Afterward, I gradually sat up and dusted the dirt and leaves from my person. I was kneeling next to the fallen animal and a familiar emotion took over. Guilt. Guilt for having to kill things to stay sane. I looked at my hands and felt discusted by what I am. Did Bella really want to live like this? For me? Would she feel the same about being a... what did Jacob Black call us? Paracites. I guess thats what we are, living off of other things. And I was just selfish enough to allow Bella be one with me.
I smiled recalling the night when Bella decieded it was time to inform Charlie of our engagement. Bella would not stop twiching as we both heard Charlie returning home.
"Stop fidgeting, Bella." I said holding onto her left hand to prevent her from hidding her engagement ring from view. "Please try to remember that you're not confessing to a murder here."
"Easy for you to say." She mumbled back. I knew Bella's parents might not take the news as well as mine. As Charlie opened the front door Bella's heart began racing.
"Calm down, Bella," I whispered trying to soothe her nerves. I knew Charlie would not be extactic but he would be thankful that we were honest with him. Bella winced when the door slammed shut behind her father. I leaned back against the cusion and greated him.
"Hey, Charlie," my relaxation seemed to set Bella further on edge.
"No!" She whispered quietly to me.
"What?" I asked confussed not knowing why she would not want me to welcome Charlie.
"Wait till he hangs his gun up!" She said as if we were plotting some drastic tatctic that needed exact timing. I laughed at her comment, I wondered what would worry Charlie more, shooting me or shooting me and it not effecting me that much.
Charlie entered the living room and spotted us sitting on the couch together and he let out a sigh, ackowlegding he wouldn't be eating right away. Bella's eyes were focused on Charlie's revolver.
"Hey. kids. What's up?" He wondered observing Bella's edgy posture.
"We'd like to talk to you," I spoke up knowing Bella would dance around the subject for some time before coming to the point. "We have some good news." His eyes narrowed at us, well mostly at me.
"Good news?" Charlie said in a low tone and looked at Bella. How could you be so careless? We talked about this Bella. His thoughts almost screamed out at us.
"Have a seat, Dad." That pharse, I believe was the worst thing Bella could have suggested to Charlie. People say 'have a seat' when someone is in serious trouble or needs to be informed of a death. I never like that kid, now look what he has done. He thought, as he sat in his recliner, his posture very much like Bella's. Why was I the only one who knew this was a good thing?
"Don't get worked up, Dad," Bella said after a moment of uncomfortable quiet. "Everything's okay." Okay? Well, I suppose it could be worse. The words great, amazing, and marvolous were floating around in my head.
"Sure it is, Bella, sure it is. If everything is so great then why are you sweating bullets?" Charlie commented.
"I'm not sweating." Bella lied badly. Oh no, he can't hold it in much longer. Three, two, on-
"You're pregnant!" Charlie bellowed. "You're pregnant, aren't you?" The question was for Bella but he was glaring at me. I'm going to kill you. He rethought as he almost reached for his gun. I'm going to kill-
"No! Of course I'm not!" Bella defended herself. This caught Charlie off guard. Not pregnant? He wondered.
"Oh, sorry." He said to his daughter, he knew he had insulted her on accident.
"Appology accepted." Bella said and released a breath. I turned to look at her and waited for her to continue. She looked at me with a look of desperation, I smiled reassuringly at her. I leaned forward and looked at Charlie.
"Charlie, I realize that I've gone about this out of order. Traditionally, I should have asked you first." Good thing you didn't ask me because I would have said no. "I mean no disrepect, but since Bella has already said yes and I don't want to diminish her choice in the matter," Oh please. "instead of asking you for her hand, I'm asking you for your blessing. We're getting married, Charlie. I love her more than anything in the world, more than my own life, and- by some miracle- she loves me that way, too. Will you give us your blessing?" God did he practice that speech? He probably got it out of a book or a movie or something. I waited patiently next to Bella for his reaction. His eyes were now focused on Bella's engagement ring. Bella stopped breathing as she watched Charlie's expression. Bella tried to get up but I whispered "Give him a minute." into her ear.
Kill him or agree to this maddness. Kill him or let her get married. Kill him or, she looks so happy whenever he is around I couldn't take that from her. Charlie kept glancing at me then Bella and back again.
"Guess I'm not that suprised," Charlie finally said. "Knew I'd have to deal with something like this soon enough." Bella finally exahaled and relaxed beside me. "Are you sure about this?" Charlie urged. Are you sure about him?
"I'm one hundred precent sure about Edward." Bella said quickly and confidently. I smiled at her certainty.
"Getting married, though? What's the rush?" Is he pressuring you? Charlie would have asked her if I had not been present. The rush was most defenetly not from my side. Bella had this dread of getting older that I could not reassure away. The other reason that Bella had, I try my best to avoid thinking about, since it would probably drive me crazy.
"We're going away to Dartmouth together in the fall, Charlie," I contributed to Bella plite. "I'd like to do that, well, the right way. It's how I was raised." I explained to the reluctant Charlie. He had nothing, his mind was reeling with 'your too young, have you lost your mind, and just wait a few decades', but he in the end relented.
"Knew this was coming," he said giving up his side of the fight. I've got it! You kids aren't getting married! Nope your not.
"Dad?" Bella wondered outloud. Then Charlie started laughing histaricly. As if he won the lottery. Your going to tell her, not me and she will never allow it!
I was holding in my laughter as Bella looked at me with raised eye brows.
"Okay, fine," Charlie finally managed through his laughter, which caused Bella too look back at him. "Get married." He said chuckling. " But..."
"But what?" Bella insisted. I knew she wasn't going to be happy about the answer to the question.
"But you have to tell your mom! I'm not saying one word to Renee! That's all yours!" Bella's face had dropped. Charlie smiled. I smiled knowing Renee was not going to be a huge hurdle as Charlie hoped she would be.
"It will be alright" I said to Bella as I pulled her close to me.
As I predicted Renee had been a help not an obstacle. With Renee's support Bella actually became at ease with the engagment, by even getting fitted without being tricked or bribed by Alice.
I got to my feet and began the walk to meet back up with Jasper and Emmett my thoughts were clouded until I heard a noise of something being stepped on that one usually does not hear while walking in the woods. I looked down and sighed. I was standing on one of the yellow posters Charlie had made up to locate Jacob Black, it was wet and tattered, it probably was blown up here by a storm. My foot covered the part to the sign that had the contact information. I leaned down and picked it up then looked at Bella's friend. I truely cannot blame him for wanting to escape. The instance when I knew I could never again be with Bella, I did something vastly similar to Jacob's flight from Forks. Sometimes I wonder if Bella should have choosen him, however, that train of thought always leads me to dark places. At one time I had all of Bella's heart to myself, but because of my choice I now share some of it with Jacob Black, I would have to live eternity with the part of Bella's heart that still belonged to me.