Author's Note: this is an early Christmas present to Josie who adores the Tyler Twin series. This story is sort of based in the end of What Have You Done? Please enjoy and review
My name is Alexandra Rose Jacqueline Tyler and I am dying. Every molecule in my body is burning and changing and my memory is slowly blurring. They say when you die your life flashes past your eyes and you remember things that you couldn't before.
They are right.
In my short twenty one years I have seen millions of alternative lives. I am a Time Lady heavily influenced by the vortex, being blessed and cursed by the gift to see the past, the future, the possibilities...
I have many regrets and sins and little time to confess.
So I shall confess my biggest sin, my main regret, my darkest secret.
There had been an opportunity to be with my father. Back as a child, I could have found him brought him home and help build a safe, loving environment. My parent's relationship could have blossomed and no one would have suffered a lot from the hands of Torchwood.
I didn't take it....
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He looked at her from the corner of his eye; very well aware that she was standing beside him though she made no sound to let him know she was there. Her long brown hair was in a messy braid that their Aunt Donna had done early this morning and her school uniform was crumpled and stained from her fight with some older boys on the field. Her beautiful golden amber yet occasionally brown eyes were glazed over slightly.
His connection to her was slightly blurred and he knew she was having a vision. He reached out and took her hand just as she gasped, being released from what she saw. She squeezed his hand and grinned at him.
"What do you see?" he asked curiously.
"Don't you want to know?" she said cheekily. "Let's go to the park, play TARDIS"
He grinned; his annoyance at her for not telling him what she saw vanished. They hadn't played that since they were extremely little...not since she had been kidnapped by Torchwood. Sometimes those nightmares still haunted her.
"Come on" she shouted running ahead. "I'll race ya"
"Alex! That's not fair" he whined running after her. "You've had ahead start"
"Can't keep up brother?" she taunted over her shoulder running faster.
"I'm going to get you sister!" he shouted. "And then I'll make you wish you never angered the tickle monster!"
"Oh I'm so scared" she said sarcastically as she sped up.
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She tripped purposely and rolled down the green hill laughingly, JJ followed her and landed on top of her, he immediately began tickling her and she squirmed, trying to avoid his fingers.
"Surrender now companion" JJ said in a deep gravel voice. "The Doctor is gone, the TARDIS is mine and I shall have the world as my possession"
"Never!" Alex Rose shouted kicking him lightly off of her. "I am Rose Tyler, defender of the Earth and you shall never win"
"Oh yes I will!"
"No you won't because I have the super cool Captain Jack Harkness and Donna Noble by my side and they have a super big gun to shoot you"
JJ turned and leaped side wards, screaming in fake agony. "Oh the pain, oh the agony, I'm dying, I'm dying" he staggered forwards and fell on the ground. "I'm dead"
Alex Rose laughed and held her fist in the air triumphantly. "I won! Take that vile alien" she shouted to the world.
"Did you hear something Doctor?" a thick Londoner accent said.
The pair froze.
"I think so, something behind those bushes" a northern blur replied.
"Me thinks, the couple just wants some alone time" an American drawl teased.
"Shut up Harkness"
There was rustling from the bushes before them and there appeared an awkward beauty obvious that she wouldn't grow into it for another few years though her eyes were filled with a fraction of wisdom and none of the sadness as the woman they knew so very well. The exact colour, size and shape of Alex Rose's eyes....
They were looking at the younger version of their mother. The one that wore hoodies and put loads of make up on. The one whose hair was obviously bleached to be lighter and was rather short. The young, inexperienced teen that hadn't seen all the hurt, darkness and danger of the Doctor just yet.
"It's just kids Doctor" she said nibbling her bottom lip. "They're playing"
The bushes rustled and a tall man with big ears and sharp piercing blue eyes in a black leather jacket and matching jeans stumbled through, a more handsome, younger man with thick black hair followed. His warm blue eyes lighting up at the sight of Alex Rose and JJ.
"Heya cuties, aren't you two a little too young to be out here on your own?" Jack asked going on his knee to be at their eyes level.
"We're almost nine" Alex Rose said coolly. "And are very capable of taking care of ourselves thank you very much"
"Ooh this one has an attitude Doc" Jack said in a mocking voice. "What are kids like these days, huh?"
Alex Rose bit her inner cheek, half tempted to smack him one and half tempted to convince him that she wasn't just an attitude. JJ was trying his hardest not to laugh after all it's no secret that Alex Rose likes to look good in Jack's eyes.
The Doctor stared at them with such intensity that it scared them. Was this the Oncoming Storm their mother had told them so much about? Was this the glare that shut even the most powerful men in the universe up? Or was this just his curious look? If so they would hate to see the real Oncoming Storm glare. The Doctor reached out and cupped their faces and stared at their eyes, the amber gold narrowed slightly while the earthy brown winded.
"You're from Galifrey" the Doctor whispered disbelievingly. "Time tots! I don't believe it, I thought...i thought they all died but here you are, growing and surviving, oh this is fantastic!" he pulled them both into an embrace. "Future Time Lord and Lady in the making"
Both JJ and Alex Rose stiffened. It was such a strange feeling...to be held by someone who was nothing but a stranger in their lives. Yes they had been cuddled by their mother, held by Jack, hugged fiercely by Donna and even had Wilf give them the occasional hug. But never...never had they been held by their own father.
"Amazing" Jack breathed and Rose grinned happily for her Doctor.
"Where are your parents? Did they survive the war? Who is looking after you?" the Doctor asked.
The twins shared a glance. Should they tell him? Could they tell him? It would cause time paradoxes, reapers and such much more. Their mother...would she handle being in close contact with the Doctor after so much heartbreak. The answer was probably no...
"Are you orphans?" Rose asked worriedly.
They didn't answer.
"Let's get you on board the TARDIS" the Doctor said standing up. "I can teach you things you couldn't imagine, all about your heritage and the universe. Don't worry I'll look after you"
The twins clutched at each other's hands both feeling a burning bitter resentment. The urge to cry was strong, they never thought they would ever hear their father say that to them.
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The TARDIS was beautiful. Absolutely magnificent, she took Alex Rose's breath away and the heart inside the console thrummed beautifully, as if to welcome her home. Even JJ sighed blissfully feeling the welcoming sensation. This was where they belong. Not in some crummy house in Liverpool, not in a Torchwood facility, not in a hotel in France, not in the Hub, not in their little cottage in York and definitely not in their house nearby.
"She's beautiful" Alex Rose and JJ whispered in unison.
"Yeah she is isn't she" Jack agreed. "So what are your names kids?"
"Alex and Jack John" JJ said carefully deciding not use their surnames; god knows what consequences it could bring. "But you can call me JJ"
The Doctor frowned slightly. "Are they your shortened Galifreyan names?" he asked.
"Yes" Alex Rose lied smoothly.
"I think they're nice names, very good ones especially the boy's" Jack said proudly.
"You would" Rose laughed.
"Well then, best be off" the Doctor said flicking switches. "We'll head back into the vortex, have dinner and then find some rooms for you two. Lessons start tomorrow"
"What?!" JJ and Alex Rose shouted.
"Hang on; we can't leave what about our family?" JJ demanded.
"Are they from Galifrey as well?" Rose asked curiously.
"Erm...no they're from Earth but-"
"Then they don't matter" the Doctor said coldly. "You're alien, you need to be in your own environment and the humans will never understand you"
"How the fuck can you say that?" Alex Rose screamed. "You fucking cold hearted bastard!"
"Alex!" JJ scolded, shocked that his twin was using such fowl language,
"How can you say they're not important" Alex Rose wept, tears running down her cheeks. She knew he could be cold, mostly towards idiots and people who abuse their powers. But to say something so horrible about three very important people in her life, two who were standing in this room. "You know nothing! You are vile, mean, awful, horrid man! And I hate you! I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. May Bad Wolf strike you now and turn you to dust!"
The Doctor and Rose looked rather shocked at hearing the words Bad Wolf once more. Those two words seemed to have been following them everywhere recently. JJ looked worried while Jack was unsure what to do.
"I will never forgive you for what you have done" Alex Rose said icily, her eyes red from her crying and her nose dribbling snot.
She then ran out of the console room as fast as she could leaving a broken and depressed Doctor, a nervous Rose, a uncertain Jack and an upset JJ who fell to the floor in fear and wrapped his arms round his knees.
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"Hey good lookin' what have you got cookin'?"
Alex Rose bit her lip hard to stop the giggle as she looked up to see a younger and quite frankly a stupider version of her uncle. This Captain Jack Harkness has just only turned a new leaf from his shady conman life by joining the Doctor and Rose on their travels, the one she knew understood the curse of being immortal, had seen bad things, saved many people and in turn occasionally made that sacrifice.
Jack slid down on the cold metal floor next to her and wrapped an arm round her shoulders. "Hey cutie I know it's upsetting but don't be so mean to the good Doctor" Jack drawled fiddling in his pocket for something. "It's hard, you know? Being the only one of your kind and to find two young children from your planet...you want to raise them, teach them and repent for your sins. That sorta crap" he pulled out an old fashioned sweet wrapped up in shiny green wrapper. "Here you go, you like toffee?"
"Yes, thank you" she whispered accepting the toffee and unwrapping it. "Where's my brother?" she asked before slipping the toffee in her mouth.
"In the console room though I think Rose is finding him a room" Jack said. "She's trying to cheer him up; I offered to look for you since I don't think poor Rosie Pose can handle such a violent temperamental child"
Alex Rose privately agreed with him. As much as she loved her mother and would do anything for her, including dying she wasn't completely blind to Rose Tyler's faults. Rose adored her little girl there was no doubt about it but she wasn't capable of dealing the psychological problems behind the pretty face. If it was to calm a normal nightmare and cheer a rather down child, that's fine, but to attempt to conquer horrific scenes from the past and future, to try to keep a promise that the men in black suits won't take you away again...it got harder and harder. And as Alex Rose grew more temperamental and violent, Rose backed off more and more leaving Jack and Donna to do the hands on parenting.
Alex Rose didn't mind that. In fact she thought it was one of the best options Rose picked in her messy complicated life. Separated from her mother practically a whole year after her birth Alex Rose had attached herself to the parents she knew, Donna and Jack. Also both Donna and Jack had fiery tempers themselves, fought both bitchy and monstrous people and knew the best way to cheer Alex Rose up.
Instead of voicing any of these thoughts Alex Rose swallowed her toffee. "JJ was always the better behaved one" she agreed.
"Yeah but you're the prettiest one" Jack said poking her nose. "Come on; let's find you a bedroom fit for a princess. I'm sure the TARDIS has already got one in the making and will make sure we'll get there"
Taking Jack's hand she allowed him to lead her towards a beautiful cherry wood door with the name JJ had given to the Doctor carved in. Jack then ruffled her hair and told her goodnight leaving her to get ready for bed. After her emotional outburst she was exhausted, having a quick shower and changing into a crisp clean white nightie, she climbed into her bed and laid there.
She closed her eyes and concentrated looking into the future.
I'm afraid not my little cub a melodious voice echoed in her mind. I rather have you work on this path the hard way...time to discover the man your father is.
I already know what man he is!
No...Not really. You know what you interpret from your visions and mother's stories. Go to sleep my dear cub, things will look brighter in the morning...
Sleep came very quickly. Later Alex Rose would rightfully accuse the TARDIS of forcefully pushing her into a sleep.
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Back on Earth, Rose was fidgeting as Donna paced the room waiting for Jack. The twins went missing shortly after leaving school, the pair cursed each other for not picking them up they should have realised being so close to Torchwood One meant they could easily abduct the twins. Jack had gone searching not only in the surrounding area but in Canary Wharf and the many Torchwood One Warehouses.
"We'll find them...we always do...they'll be fine....they're strong kids" Donna muttered to herself as she continued to pace. Rose suddenly dropped her cup of tea that she had been given by Wilf to calm her nerves. The china shattered causing Donna to jump. "Rose? What is it? Rose?"
"I remember" Rose whispered. "Oh god, oh gods Donna help me!"
"Remember what Rose?" Donna asked grabbing hold of Rose's shaking hands. "What is it?"
"The twins haven't been abducted by Torchwood....the Doctor has them"
"Oh shit"
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The Doctor could feel her eyes burning with hate and resentment. It was unsettling. For some reason having this little girl glare at him hurt more than any other being glare at him...even Susan. It was the next morning so to speak and he had dragged the girl and her twin brother to the library for a lesson, Rose and Jack tagged along out of sheer interest.
"I don't know why you're bothering" Alex said coldly. "I already know this. I know everything"
JJ glared at her. "Alex, not all of us have your gift of foresight" he said calmly. "I am interested. I want to learn and I know if you got over your stubbornness you would enjoy this as well"
I want to learn. That sounded so similar and looking at this boy with his scruffy brown hair and warm excited brown eyes eager and prepared; obviously taking in every single word he uttered...somehow it reminded the Doctor of himself.
"Sorry" Alex muttered looking properly chastened. "Continue on sir" she said to him, sarcasm on the word sir.
He hasn't got her respect. Not yet.
"Please carry on Doctor" Rose pleaded childishly. The Doctor smiled fondly at her, she always listened to him, out of all his companions she loved his stories most...it's the instructions that she like all companions never listens to. "I love hearing all about your planet"
Looking at the warm amber gold eyes, filled with admiration and fascination the Doctor felt comforted. He turned his gaze to the young girl next to Rose and his insides turned cold. The exact same copy of the eyes that adored him was filled with such burning resentment...
He knew why this look hurts most. It was almost as if it was from Rose.
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A scream.
A spine chilling scream that echoed throughout the corridors of the TARDIS. The Doctor ran from the library and almost bumped into a half naked Jack and sleepy Rose in her over-sized t-shirt as the three of them ran to Alex's room. They flung the door open to find the girl half-twisted in her covers and eyes wide with terror as sweat dripped from her forehead.
Her twin ran past them and jumped on her bed, his hand going to her temple. "Alex...is it a vision" he whispered, he then frowned. "No...A nightmare...you hadn't have one of those for a while"
Alex pulled away from him and fell out of the bed; she got up and ran to Jack, flinging her arms round him. "Uncle Jack it was so scary!" she whimpered into his chest. "They got me again and....and...And used it....again!"
She burst into tears and Jack tried to calm her down with murmured comforts. In the end Jack lifted her up and carried her out promising to get hot chocolate and then have a cuddle in his room where the nasty people won't get her.
The Doctor turned to JJ. "Your name is Jack...after Harkness isn't it?"
"The family you made us abandon" JJ said quietly. "He was part of it....his future self. Alex's protector and the only one to calm her down from a proper nightmare"
"Who are the they she was talking about?" Rose asked.
"Torchwood" JJ said fiercely his hands clenched into fists. "Humans who study aliens. They took her and examined her...tortured her! Jack rescued her but...there was a lot of bloodshed...she hasn't been the same since"
"The poor kid" Rose murmured sympathetically, she then pulled JJ into a hug. "It must be hard for you as well. Having to look after such a traumatised sister. Come on sweetie I'll make us some hot chocolate and we'll have a cuddle as well"
JJ looked delighted and allowed Rose to take him away. The Doctor felt alone now that his companions had taken away the last children of his kind. He couldn't help wonder if Rose was also part of this family that he had snatched the children from...but if so...where was he? Why did he leave Rose and Jack with such a responsibility?
He loved Rose and Jack. Rose in a more romantic sense though he'll never admit it. Jack in a brotherly sense though he drives him insane. He needed them desperately like a dying man needed air...it made no sense to abandon them.
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It was the first foray out of the TARDIS in weeks. Rose had been unsure about taking the twins out in case it ended up being another adventure where they almost die. The Doctor convinced her that they would go to a safe peaceful planet for some shopping and even got her to go to the wardrobe and dress in local garb.
The planet was sizzling hot and looked almost like an Aladdin set with gigantic palace and small market throughout the streets included. Rose wore pale pink cotton baggy pants with a long white pink dress over it while Alex Rose wore a very similar outfit in dark green; the Doctor found them unusual colours since the people mostly wore brown and white. He merely hoped no one would think he, Jack and JJ had kidnapped two noble women.
The wonders of the planet and its foreign foods and wonders had everyone but Jack gasping and running round in excitement. The Doctor made a point that everyone had to meet him at the TARDIS when the sun went down as he and Jack left to find a very much needed part for the TARDIS.
"Right then what should we do?" Rose mused to the others. "The Doctor had given us some credits...should we find a trinket or something?"
Rose loved trinkets. Ornaments, objects, even mugs, anything different and from somewhere new she wanted a little one to put in her room as a souvenir. Alex Rose knew that Rose never had time to pack her trinkets when she left the TARDIS for good, only packing the very much needed clothes and wanted photos.
"Yes let's, lets!" Alex Rose cheered. "I want to see everything!"
Rose laughed as both Alex Rose and JJ intertwined their hands into hers and dragged her across the dusty path along all the market stalls. Giggling and hyperactive, almost as if they were children versions of the Doctor himself. Throughout the whole day they went to one store and another, looking at everything before deciding what to get. They then sat on a pile of wood with their snacks, the strange alien like food tasted wonderful. Rose looked down at the happy twins who were making a mess with crumbs. She noticed a glitter of gold on Alex's neck.
"What's that?" she asked pointing at the locket.
"Oh...this is my locket" Alex Rose said pulling out the heart shaped locket showing it to Rose. "My godfather gave it to me to remind me my family will always be in my heart"
"That's sweet...may I?"
JJ and Alex Rose exchanged worried looks. Should they tell Rose the truth? That she was their mother? That they weren't full blooded Galifreyans? That Alex Rose especially was heavily influenced by the vortex due to a mistake Rose will make very soon in the future? But if they didn't tell her...could they last not being her children? It was difficult to not call her Mum, difficult to not throw themselves in her arms and cry, difficult to not tell her how much they love her and needed her, difficult to not say sorry for leaving her.
Alex Rose made the decision. She nodded. Rose beamed and opened up the locket, her eyes widening in surprise. "That's my mother and JJ" Alex Rose informed her. "I was forced to leave her on Earth with my godfather and godmother"
"You're..." Rose whispered horrified.
"From the future" JJ said quietly and gently. "Yet live in your past. A mistake on Dad's side of things...he doesn't know we exist. Mum...we love you"
"Mum" Alex Rose whispered looking up at her with Rose's eyes.
"Mum is so going to kill me" Rose managed as she tried to smile. "Oh come here you two" she dragged her children into her arms but she was so frightened.
Nineteen years old, only been in two relationships, fallen madly in love with an older alien who travels in time. No qualifications, no job, no anything and she's a mother to two nine year olds.
She was fucking terrified.
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There was a difference in Rose. The Doctor could tell the past few weeks she had been tense, chewing on her bottom lip more often and fidgeting every few seconds during the lessons. At first he put it down to homesickness but when he offered to take her back for a visit she flat out refused him in a hurried and panicked voice before suddenly dragging the twins out for treats in the kitchen. She spent more time with the twins as well, many times the Doctor went to Rose's room to find both of them tucked into her bed listening to her read or even them read to her or he'll go to Alex to find Rose brushing the young girl's hair or her sitting curled up in one of the many living rooms laughing at JJ's jokes. She had even started acting motherly to them, wiping dirt of their faces, scolding them and protecting them fiercely like her own mother would.
The sheer domestics of it all unnerved him.
Then Jack who was worried about Rose just like him had dragged her away at one point for a private chat. He came back looking slightly angry and worried and refused to tell the Doctor anything, instead he acted like the uncle JJ had told the Doctor he was. The Doctor felt slightly left out but shrugged it off as he carried on teaching the children; he started to find a small connection with Alex who eyes the console with a hungry expression in her eyes.
"You want to know how to work her?" he asked her once.
"I would like to be with her...to look after her and be looked after by her...to mend and drive...to..."
"Travel in time" the Doctor finished with a grin on his face.
She smiled slightly. "Yes" she agreed.
"I'll teach you" he promised her and to his delight her face lit up with excitement. "I'll teach you everything about the TARDIS"
For the first time ever, she had flung her arms round his neck and hugged him. "Thank you!" she squealed. "I have to tell JJ, he would be so happy!"
She ran off, almost jostling Rose who was carrying a cup of tea. "Hey watch it" Rose shouted after the little girl.
The Doctor chuckled. "Oh let her be, she's young and free and has the whole time and space to play with"
"Not that free" Rose mumbled as she placed the cup near the monitor.
"Pardon?" the Doctor said coldly.
"Well...i was wondering...would you ever bring them back to their mother?" Rose asked anxiously, gnawing at her bottom lip once more. "I mean, she must be worried, their family must be worried like my Mum was"
"Humans can't handle them" the Doctor said flatly. "They're beyond their understanding and need a more intellectual upraising"
"Oh right...so should me and Jack stay away from them then?" Rose snapped.
"What? No, you two are fine, you time travel you understand things most humans don't-"
"What if she already understands? What if she's worried and panicking and crying because the two children she loved and brought up are gone missing and as far as she knows they could be trapped in some dangerous time like World War Two?"
"I doubt she even cares Rose since they had those Torchwood fellows breathing down their necks" the Doctor said shrugging. "Now then how about we have an adventure?"
Rose turned away so he wouldn't see the hurt in her eyes. He thought she was a bad mother...he thought she wouldn't care...it didn't matter how terrified she was, she loved those twins already and she knew her future self would be in torment over losing them.
"Yeah, sure, whatever"
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It was a disaster.
A total horrifying disaster. They went to a planet for the usual sight seeing adventure when they ended up dragged into a corrupt dictatorship that needed to be taken down. Everything had been going their way, Jack got rid of the guards and Rose helped cornered the villain and the Doctor were about to do the last blow when the bastard grabbed hold of Alex and used her as a hostage...
Listening to Alex yelling at him to ignore the dictator and stop his reign. The Doctor did what was planned, in revenge the coward used his gun on her...only it was one that sent electro-waves into ones body and electrocuted her instead. In retaliation, the Doctor snatched Jack's blaster and shot the guy in the knee instantly.
She screamed more than she should and wouldn't stop shaking afterwards. She fell to the floor and couldn't get up. She cried and cried and JJ couldn't do anything as they ran Jack carried her into the TARDIS and once it was in the time vortex she was laid on the captain's seat where she was still whimpering and shivering.
"I don't understand she shouldn't react like this" the Doctor said agitatedly.
"Alex is Electrophobic" JJ whispered. "Has been since that time she was kidnapped...i told you they tortured her...used electric shock on her"
Rose gasped horrified and Jack clenched a hand tightly into a fist.
"Humans!" the Doctor spat out in disgust.
"D-D-D-D" Alex stuttered, still shivering. The Doctor knelt down by the Captain's seat and took her smaller hand into his. "D-D-Dad" she whispered.
The Doctor smiled a sad smile. "I'm so sorry" he said quietly. "He's gone with Galifrey, you, me and your brother are-"
To his surprise, Alex suddenly sat up and flung herself into his arms sobbing loudly. Her hands clung tightly to his jumper as it gradually got soaked with her tears. He slowly put a hand on her back and one in her hair, petting her, trying to comfort her.
"Y-You saved me" she said. "You saved me. You k-k-killed for me...for me...you wanted me? Daddy!"
Her attitude. Her eyes. The fact she and her twin brother were so close to Rose Tyler and Captain Jack Harkness for no apparent reason. Their thirst for knowledge, for adventures, for him...there were no other Time Lords that survived. The mother that Rose was worried about...was Rose...those little pieces that he should have put together long ago...
"It's ok, it's all right, I'm here" he murmured holding her tighter, he turned to face the paled face brown haired boy that looked nothing like his mother nor this body. He inwardly snorted; he probably regenerated into a useless pretty boy and left the poor lad with his looks. He held an arm out for him and he ran to him, burying his head into his other shoulder. "Daddy is here, for both of you. I'm here, I'll always be here"
"Their names..." Jack croaked out. "Are Alexandra Rose Jacqueline Tyler and Jack John Mickey Tyler....they prefer Alex Rose and JJ"
"Alex Rose and JJ" the Doctor murmured holding the small children closer. It was scary how small they actually were, after all they were nine and yet so petite, so delicate. "Sounds perfect"
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The next few weeks were almost heaven to the Doctor. Having Alex Rose and JJ on board had settled into a peaceful routine of lessons, fiddling with the TARDIS, short domestic moments (that still disturbed him slightly, he wasn't used to this) and loud noisy happiness buzzing throughout the TARDIS. They went on short blissful sight seeing adventures where Jack flirted, Rose laughed, the twins ran wild and the Doctor grinned. He had become accustomed to tucking the twins in bed and telling them stories about Galifrey, he had managed to choke down Rose's terrible cooking and to his surprise no longer needed to ask Jack to tone the innuendo down.
It was some what an early morning, hard to tell in the TARDIS, all the Doctor knew was he and the twins were up while Rose and Jack were sleeping. The twins were under the console, making their own repairs while the Doctor watched it all on the monitor, giving out advice here and there. Not that they needed it, the two of them were naturals. Rose stumbled in half asleep in her pyjamas and dressing gown she yawned and smiled sleepily up at him.
"Where are the twins?" she asked immediately. The Doctor pointed at the hatch hole and she nodded understandably. "So what are we planning to do today? Because if we're going out later I can try and cook a big breakfast"
The Doctor inwardly shuddered at the idea of Rose cooking but before he could form a reply Alex Rose climbed out of the hatch. Her hair in two messy pig tails, her clothes and face smudge in oil but her grin was clear.
"We need to go to Cardiff" she informed them. "TARDIS needs some fuel"
"Fuel?" Rose repeated thinking of a petrol station and wondering how she was going to explain why a big blue box needs some.
"Not that kind of fuel" the Doctor and Alex Rose said scornfully.
"The rift bleeds energy" JJ explained, popping up from the hatch, his hair even messier than usual if that was possible. "By opening the engines the TARDIS can absorb that energy and then off we go!"
"Brilliant, I can call Mickey over and he can meet you two" Rose squealed excitedly.
The twins exchanged looks. They never knew Mickey, Rose had never even considered the idea of letting them run across the street and bump into him. All they had to go on was a picture of a cheeky black teenager and her stories. Apparently he was a bit of an idiot right now.
"Maybe" the Doctor grumbled. "now get Harkness up and get dressed...on second thoughts get dressed first, god knows what will be going through his head seeing you dressed like that"
"What's wrong with how I dress?" Rose demanded.
The Doctor was smart enough to not answer that.
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Jack was cheerful, he kept singing and dancing about with the twins claiming that he can't wait to see what Rose century looks likes. He also wanted to see how old he looked though the Doctor kept mumbling he wanted to avoid older Jack and Rose if possible. They were bound to know where the twins are by now and probably want them back...the Doctor wasn't quite ready to give them up just yet. They had barely landed in Cardiff when there was a knock on the door.
"Bet it's me" Jack said grinning as he went to open the door. He whistled. "Well hello gorgeous"
"Hello back at you beautiful" came the ever annoying and familiar American drawl. The Doctor groaned. "I can hear you Doc, you sound pleasant as ever and Rosie Pose blimey I forgot how cute you were back then"
The older Jack came in, he was wearing the 1940s clothing that they met the original Jack in; his hair was lighter and styled a lot better making his nose look smaller than it actually was. Cold blue eyes met cold blue eyes and the Doctor gripped the console tightly there was something wrong with Jack Harkness.
"I only got my memories about this the night you took them away" Jack said calmly as Alex Rose and JJ ran to him. "Hello my little princess, soldier, you both been very good though Alexandra Rose you need to keep your attitude to yourself"
Jack scooped Alex onto his shoulder and she grinned down at him. "You don't" she said cheekily causing Jack to chuckle.
There was a gasp at the door and the group turned to see a redhead dressed rather fashionably staring at the TARDIS. "Cor blimey Rose wasn't kidding when she said it was bigger on the inside" she said flipping her hair back. "You little brats! How dare you worry your mother like that? Don't you know how worried I was? You've given me gray hairs!"
"Auntie Donna!" the twins chorused leaping away from Jack and tackling her with delight.
The harsh redhead softened slightly as she hugged them back tightly. "Not fair" she mumbled. "I had to wait nine years to see you again and it's only been a couple months for you" after kissing their foreheads she let them go and glared at the Doctor, hands on her hips. "Big ears" she declared.
The Doctor glared at her. "Gobby redhead" he snarled back.
"Ooh, I like him even if he is a moody little wotsit" Donna said approvingly to Rose who blushed lightly.
The door opened once more and a nervous blonde hovered by the door. The Doctor's eyes widened as he saw Rose Tyler in about twenty years time. She didn't look much older, her hair was a darker blonde that fell down to her hips and she wore less makeup and no longer wore hoodies. But that was it...she just hadn't aged. The twins cried when they saw her and she cried as well, the Doctor tried to squash down the guilt building up, nine years Donna said, he made Rose wait for nine years until she got to see her children again.
"You should feel guilty" Donna said reading his expression. "Honestly you deserve a slap, a black eye and a broken nose for what you did. Those kids are her life, she works so hard to protect them and you yanked them away right under her nose"
"Donna" the older Rose said warningly. "It doesn't matter, not anymore because we have them back"
"Oh wait till you meet my new team kids" older Jack said cheerfully taking Donna's hand and pulling her away from the Doctor. "I got a genius called Tosh, a sarcastic bugger called Owen and a good woman called Suzie. You will love them to pieces"
"Let's meet them! I want to meet them" Alex Rose said excitedly snatching Jack's free hand. "We could all go out for lunch then, right Dad?" she turned and looked up at the Doctor adoringly, her free hand reaching for his.
"Of course, nothing like good old fashioned fish and chips" the Doctor agreed taking her other hand. "I know a good chippy around here, the best in Cardiff"
They exited the TARDIS together just as another one began to materialise the opposite end of them. Older Rose gasped and clutched JJ tightly while Alex Rose tightened her grip on Jack's and the Doctor's hand. The TARDIS finished materialising and eventually the door opened to reveal a good looking yet skinny man in a brown suit, hands tucked into his pockets as he looked at the group nervously.
"My god he's a paper cut!" Donna squawked. "I take it back Rose, you have no taste in men"
Rose ignored her as she slowly walked over to the Doctor, JJ clinging to her hand. They stood there staring at one another for a moment before the older Doctor grabbed her into a full body bear hug. Jack sighed and dragged Donna over to them as the older Doctor was ruffling JJ's hair, Alex Rose quickly let go of his hand and clung tighter to the ninth Doctor.
He looked down at her with raised eyebrows. "He is me you know" he said softly.
She shook her head. "He isn't. He's different, he's hyperactive, childlike and quite an idiot and he left her! He left my Mum all alone for some other woman"
"I bet there was a reason" the Doctor said looking at the family scene where Donna was now slapping this younger looking Doctor much to his everlasting amusement. "The woman must have been in danger and very important to time and space"
Alex Rose snorted. "Madam De Pompadour is important to time and space?"
"Yes even mistresses are important" the Doctor said going down on one knee and pulling Alex Rose in a tight hug. "She would never have been your mother. Given the chance I would have done my best as a father to you" he pulled away and stood up. "Go on, I don't bite"
She smiled tearfully at him before turning around and running towards the next Doctor who was standing there waiting for her with this stupid big grin on his face.
"DADDY!" she screamed, tears running down her face as she jumped into his arms and clung onto him tightly. "I'm....I'm sorry"
She didn't know why she said that. It just felt right to say it. This one was different from the other in different ways; his suit was softer yet scratchy against her cheek. He smelt different and his hair was tickling her forehead yet he was holding her with that same desperation of a father who almost lost a child.
"No" he murmured. "I'm sorry"
DWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDWDW
From that point on there are many different paths. Some happy, some not so happy. But eventually, somehow I would have found myself into Ianto's arms, I hope. I would have probably loved time travel and being there with my father and mother and my other half, my twin. But I couldn't do it.
I was so scared. I wondered if he really ever wanted me or is it just some big fantasy I made up in attempt to make me happy and hopeful once more. I was rather cynical even back then. So when JJ asked me what I saw, I snapped at him and marched home, ignoring the temptation of going to the park.
I grumpily ate dinner and didn't interact with anyone at all and then later, after Mum had tucked me into bed and gone to bed her, I snuck out in my nightgown and wandered back to the park.
But of course he had already gone by then.
I'm dying to catch my breath
Oh why don't I ever learn?
I've lost all my trust;
though I've surely tried to turn it around
Can you still see the heart of me?
All my agony fades away
when you hold me in your embrace
Don't tear me down for all I need
Make my heart a better place
Give me something I can believe
Don't tear me down
You've opened the door now, don't let it close
I'm here on the edge again
I wish I could let it go
I know that I'm only one step away
from turning it around
Can you still see the heart of me?
All my agony fades away
when you hold me in your embrace
Don't tear me down for all I need
Make my heart a better place
Give me something I can believe
Don't tear it down, what's left of me
Make my heart a better place
I tried many times but nothing was real
Make it fade away, don't break me down
I want to believe that this is for real
Save me from my fear
Don't tear me down
Don't tear me down for all I need
Make my heart a better place
Don't tear me down for all I need
Make my heart a better place
Give me something I can believe
Don't tear it down, what's left of me
Make my heart a better place
Make my heart a better place
All I Need – Within Temptation