A/N: I do not own Jane Austen by any stretch of the imagination. This story was inspired by reflecting on Lizzie's previous suitors and her thoughts on them and looking at some of the parallels to my own life. This story can tie in with both my The Star of the Morning or The Trouble with Fallen Angels. As always my story title is taken from the song No Promises by Cheat Codes with Demi Lovato. I'll freely concede the song works more with Wickham than Collins but I like the title.
No Promises
Jane's letter had not surprised her. She wished that it had. She wished that Jane was happier right now. She wished that Jane wasn't still struggling with the effects of Bingley's abandonment. She wished that she could tell Jane of what Colonel Fitzwilliam had said about Darcy's involvement but doubted that it would help. The fact of the matter was is that she doubted Jane would feel any better hearing that Bingley had been able to be persuaded to leave her side and thought her family inappropriate than her thoughts at the moment that he simply hadn't loved her.
Though maybe it would help… How should Lizzie know she had never been in love? Her two previous suitors had left their marks and impressions but were by no means a great love affair like Jane and Bingley. They had had something that Lizzie still was not sure how to describe. When Bingley had looked at Jane, he had looked at her like she was the sun or an angel maybe. Jane had been so calm but also so melancholy since Bingley had left. He had spent his time with her sister and then had thrown her to the gossips. While Lizzie resented how men had treated her such as Wickham, Collins, or even Darcy although he had at least generally been honest to her, Bingley had abandoned Jane which Lizzie was not sure was a forgivable offense. Neither Wickham or Collins had captured her heart or much of her interest.
George Wickham very early on had shown his interest in her. He paid close attention to her and was very flattering towards her. He seemed to appreciate her wit and saw Darcy in a similar way to how she did. But then he had moved on to pay attention to Miss King. Now while what she had said to him was true, she knew that handsome young men needed something to live on as well as the poor ones. But the way he had acted about it. That had left a poor impression on her tongue. She wasn't even sure why it did but it had. Looking back she found, even more, flaws in his character. She conceded now that he had not been wholly right. From what Colonel Fitzwilliam said, Miss Darcy was a lovely but shy young lady. Wickham had said that he would not run from Darcy but had avoided the Netherfield Ball. Finally, there was the key detail of him revealing so much of his past with the Darcy family, despite his insistence that he could never darken the younger Darcy till he forgot the elder. Yet the entire town seemed to know and it certainly wasn't her telling everyone.
So perhaps she should not have paid him so much mind or attention. But how could she help it in a way? A handsome man finding her beautiful, more interesting than her sisters after Darcy's stinging comment. Who could resist that sort of attention? Certainly not her, her brain snarkily commented. But that wasn't all of it either she knew. Otherwise, Mr. Collins would have been much more successful as a suitor. Admiration was nice and always appreciated but that was the only trait of Mr. Collins had that she could agree with.
Mr. Collins had admired her yes, after her oldest sister. Now while she adored Jane and freely admitted that Jane was the beauty of the family. She selfishly did want her husband to at least find her equally attractive if not more so then her sister. Her real complaint about Mr. Collins besides his annoying conversation habits and rather an unattractive appearance was the fact the way he treated her and her personality.
Her personality appeared to be a detriment to him rather than an appealing trait. Now while Lizzie knew she was by no means perfect, she did not think it was unreasonable for her future husband to like at least some of her non-physical traits. Mr. Collins had appeared to not get her sense of humor. He had hated her outgoing spirit. The worst was the fact that he wanted her to always agree with him. Lizzie enjoyed a good discussion, and while she knew that respecting and obeying her husband would most likely have to be part of any future wedding vows, she did not think it was unreasonable for her to share her opinions on the topic. She might be right or she might not be, but the fact remained that she had a right to her opinion. Mr. Collins seemed to disagree with that assessment.
She wondered for a second from a voice that sounded much like Jane that if these two men's treatment had bothered her so little why Darcy's one comment had bothered her so much, but she quickly redirected her thoughts. She was not perfect and did not expect her future husband to be. But was it too much to ask for him to like both her beauty and her wit? For him to appreciate her humor and her opinion? For him to love her and be a leader? Was she truly asking for too much?
Lizzie laughed softly to herself, she might be asking too much with what her dowery was and besides that, she doubted these ramblings would help Jane feel any better at all. She had just started "Dearest Jane," when a maidservant came letting her know that Mr. Darcy had come to call…again.
A/N: Yes, for the record Darcy is coming to propose. Whether her reflecting on her previous suitors changes her response is up to you.