Disclaimer: I disclaim

A/N: This is a oneshot that has been plaguing me ever since I realized that this 'ship-dom' actually has tons of potential. Both Scott and Rogue have similar problems---mutations that they cannot control by themselves…and in Rogue's case…she can't control hers at all. Both have to use something to interfere with their mutations to keep others safe. Rogue with her many layers of clothes, and Cyclops with his visor. If there was anyone who could understand Rogue the best it would be Scott.

The oneshot is based some months after the second movies and it contains some spoilers for the first and second movies, so if you don't want them to be 'spoiled' for you, you don't have to read this…but I would really appreciate it and love you if you did and gave me some nice reviews (hint hint nudge nudge).

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He had left, again. But that was something that I was getting used to by now. He'd never really been a stable figure in my life, but now as I think things over, no one really has ever been a solid figure in my life. Not my family, no one. I'm a solitary person, but not by choice, my skin has cursed me that way.

I run my fingers through the curtains of my window, looking outside at the darkness below. Not even the moon was visible in the cloud-filled sky, and I had to smile darkly at the way the sky reflected my attitude when it came to my life. Everything was dark. No ray of hope could be visible through the dark clouds that only promised hurt and pain. But I was used to that…that was my life.

Some time has passed since our last mission, when the Doc died. Doc, God, I'm sounding like him again. But then again, I've never really gotten over the time he touched me on the tower, giving me some of his life and putting his own in danger. Since then I have gotten over some of his more visible characteristics, like the grumpiness and wanting to thrash any and everyone I saw, but other than that people believe that I am fine. They don't know that I never really give up everything of the people whom I have 'absorbed'. A part of them will always stay with me, changing me slightly, slowly molding me into the person I am to become.

Maybe it wasn't so bad that I still had part of him in me. That way, no matter how many times he left me, I would still have him here with me and I wouldn't feel so alone. Plus, the arguments between the part of him in me and the part of Magneto in me kept me from being bored. They were quite entertaining when they started arguing—which they did on a regular basis.

Going away from the window I looked down at Jubilee, my roommate, and watched enviously as she slept peacefully. Why couldn't I get a good night's sleep like that? Why? Why was it that every night I was unable to sleep, unable to think, unable to do anything else except look out of the window and pace my bedroom floor? I couldn't handle it anymore. All of this was going to drive me insane—if I am not insane already. What I wouldn't do for one night of peace!

Pulling my housecoat over my long pajama pants and long sleeve turtleneck shirt, I didn't really know why I did it. I even slept with my gloves on…and socks. God, the hot nights were torture for me, sleeping like this. Thankfully Jubilee was a great and understanding roommate, who wouldn't complain when I would turn up the AC, forcing her to wear more than the scanty little pajamas she usually wore.

Going to the door I looked at the doorknob as if it were the most interesting thing I had ever encountered, but my thoughts were on different things completely.

Fear. It had me keeping myself away from others. I was afraid of hurting them without wanting to. I remember the first guy I kissed, I remembered how that had hurt him, and from that day on I had known that I couldn't love, I couldn't have others love me either…which was why I was having a problem with Bobby. I cared for him, honestly I did. He was my boyfriend and loved me, and I cared deeply for him, but I knew that this was only going to hurt him. No matter how many times I told him this, no many times I had broken up with him, he would shrug it off and ignored the fact that I had broken up with him. He was stubborn, unnaturally so.

Reaching for the doorknob, I opened it slowly and then walked outside into the darkness of the halls. I didn't close the door, there was still a chance for me to return and continue pacing my room, but I felt so restless, like a caged animal. No. I had to get out.

Closing the door behind me as quietly as I could as to not disturb Jubilee, I looked at the hall both ways, wondering which direction to head in. Deciding to go right, I silently tried remembering how many nights I had been forced to walk myself all over Xavier's School for Talent Young People at night, sleepless. But the times were too many to count, so I stopped trying.

My mind wandered onto one of my favorite topics as I silently walked down the darkened corridor. Wolverine. Logan. Hero. I smirked at the face he would make at me if he knew I thought of him as my personal hero, but it didn't matter. He was my hero and I would always love him deep down inside. Still, my love for him was changing, and I didn't know if I was too happy with that. Unstable as he was, Logan had been an important person in my life, and his repeatedly saving my life had caused me to not only develop a visible and undeniable crush on him, but I had also made him my personal idol. I had been insanely jealous of the Doc because I knew that he loved her, but now I could only feel admiration for the woman who had put our lives over hers and had saved us.

My fingers found themselves to the dog-tags I still wore around my neck, and my thoughts once more returned to Logan. Yes, I would always love him, but as I had said once before, loving would only hurt me and the person I loved. Some sick person had decided that I wouldn't ever be able to feel the touch of a loved one, and I had been doomed to a life of solitude.

So, considering this, the fact that I wasn't in love with Logan anymore didn't seem so bad. Sure. I'd probably still idolize him the next time that he returned to make sure that I hadn't died or anything, but it wouldn't be the same and I know that he'd realize it as well. We have that sort of connection. I've never had it with anyone else. Then again, no one had ever given a fig about what happened to Rogue the mutant. No one except Wolverine…and now the people here with me...but Wolverine had cared for me first and that meant that he would always have a special place in my heart only for him.

I crossed a room and heard footsteps pacing impassively. Without looking at what room it was I knew who was up like I was. Every time I would come out I would hear him as he walked. Sometimes he would cry, and the sounds of his sobs made me feel more than I had felt in a long time now, because there was someone in this world that might understand me.

Standing in front of his door, I just looked at it in silence, imagining the man on the other side. He would be pacing back and forth, and impassive and tortured expression on his face, similar to the one on mine. Hours would pass and he'd continue that way until he would finally tire and go to sit down somewhere and read, or possibly look at her pictures and that would be when the tears returned.

I had to hand it to him, even though his life was torn; Scott Summers sure was a good actor. Everyone thought that he had gotten over his grief of losing Jean. Everyone thought that he was moving on with his life and had accepted the fact that the woman he loved was gone forever. But I knew better. Even while he was acting tough and in control during the day, I knew that at night, when he was without something to do to keep his mind occupied, Scott would break down and grieve over the loss of his Jean Grey.

Shaking my head, I walked away from that door and went down the stairs. I realized that every time I listened to him pacing in the night, or crying his pain over his lost love, I started admiring the man more. He was a strong one, in a sense he was stronger than Logan. Because Logan was afraid of loving and losing, he hid behind his tough "I'm a badass I don't cry" exterior. But not Scott, he had loved and lost. I admired him for taking the chance, for loving, for doing something that I was still too frightened to do.

Lost in my thoughts I really didn't know all of the parts of the school I visited, but I do know that I went to many, looking at them without really seeing them, lost to the images in my mind.

When I entered a certain classroom I do know that I couldn't help but get jarred out of my thoughts as I suddenly remembered Pyro. He'd never really been close to me, but he had been one of Bobby's best friends, and we had gone on that last mission together, so I felt keen regret when I remembered how he had decided to join Magneto and Mystique, disappearing with them during our first and last mission.

Poor Pyro, he had always been the first one to step forwards and hurt a human who didn't like mutants. I remembered when he had tried to burst every cop in sight into flames right outside of Bobby's house. I had stopped him, draining him of some of his power. So yes, I had a part of Pyro within me as well.

This, of course, was a rather confusing mixture if there ever was any. There was Logan, Magneto, Pyro, and yes of course, Bobby. What a mixture of men inside of me, and men who saw life differently and argued their beliefs to the point that I got a headache and had to wish them away.

The first thing that told me that I had somehow walked outside of the school was the fact that I could feel the breeze on my face. That was refreshing, and I smiled sadly. The moon still wasn't visible and I really didn't know where I was, but I was guided by my senses, which had quickened ever since I had absorbed a part of Wolverine. So yes, I had absorbed something other than his foul mood.

Frowning at the fact that I still wasn't the teensiest bit sleepy, I sighed. Maybe tonight was another sleepless night where I would toss and turn in bed, lost to my thoughts and memories.

"It isn't safe to be out here on your own like this. Especially in these dangerous times for mutants like us."

Twirling around at that voice, I placed hand to my heart, trying to will it from beating so wildly. "Mr. Summers! What are you doing out here?"

"The same reason you are I guess." This was the first time that I had seen him at night. The other times I had only heard him, imagining what he was doing. But this time I got to see him, and my heart went out to my mathematic teacher. His façade of 'control' was gone completely, and the only thing left of Scott Summers was messy hair, slumped shoulders, and an exhausted looking body. If I could see his eyes I knew that they would show the defeat and sorrow that his body language demonstrated.

"You couldn't sleep."

"But you already knew that."

I blushed slightly, realizing that he had somehow found out that I sometimes listened in on him. It would be stupid to lie up to this point, so I didn't deny it. I only pulled my housecoat tighter over my body and suddenly looked up at the sky, surprised that the moon was beginning to appear from its hidden place.

Scott walked to my right and looked up at the moon as well. For some reason the moon seemed to be rapidly coming out from behind the clouds. "I've always heard people talking about how beautiful the moon looks when it's turned as red as blood." He said and I wondered if he was talking to me or to himself. "But I don't know. The only color I remember seeing it is red."

Sorrow for him filled my soul and I returned placing my gaze on the moon. Just when you feel as if no one could ever have it worst than you could you actually find the unfortunate bugger. The thought of never seeing any color but red made me realize that I had taken my sight for granted. I couldn't touch, but I could see well—and Scott had it the other way around. He could touch all he liked, but he was forced to either wear his dark shades or his visor so that he could keep the rays coming out of his eyes from killing all those he loved. We both were a danger to people we loved, though in two different ways. "It's a beautiful silver tonight."

He smiled sadly. "Jean used to hate the night and the moon. She was always a sunny morning person, something I could never get used to."

This was the first time I had ever heard him mention the Doc since her heroic death, and so I hoped that the shock wouldn't register in my voice when I finally managed to say: "I'm more of a night person myself."

"I like the stars." Scott announced with a ghost of a smile, coming closer to me and throwing his head backwards, looking at the many stars in the sky. "When I was a kid on the streets I would just spend my nights shivering and looking up at them. I named them even. It was such a long time ago that I can't remember one name, wait a second, I think I actually named one Estelle. Can't by the life of me remember which one it was though."

A soft smile appeared on my face before I even knew that that had touched me. I'd heard so many people talking to Scott, trying to comfort him, while he stayed silent and seemingly trying to ignore them. I guess he had finally decided that he needed to talk, even if it was about the stars. Since I didn't mind the conversation or the company—no matter how odd both were—I stayed silent, realizing that I could best help Scott by just listening to him.

"Then, when Xavier found me and brought me here, I looked up at all the astrology books. I know every constellation up there." For a minute he sounded like the old Scott. "Not that I'm bragging or anything."

The smile deepened and I was surprised by this. I hadn't smiled—really smiled—in a long time. It felt odd at first, as if I had gotten out of practice, but it grew more natural and I felt that it was more sincere as well. "Why didn't you become the astrology teacher then?"

"There isn't an astrology class." He shot back with a sad little smile, making me wonder what would make him smile happily once more; to become the happy man he used to be.

"True."

There were sounds in the bushes, and I stiffened while Scott took battle position. But only a stray cat appeared, racing away into the shadows with evident fear as if sensing that Scott could have easily pulverized it.

Scott relaxed somewhat. "That reminded me why I came out here in the first place." He said, returning once more to the tired and defeated man that he had become. "We should go inside. It used to be safe to be out here in the dark, but now, I wouldn't consider it safe even during the day."

I nodded and we went inside of the school once more. We walked in silence, both in our own perspective thought. For a minute I wondered what he was thinking of that left him so dejected, but then I scolded myself, because I did know what it was. He was remembering Jean. Sadness filled my soul as I realized that here was a man who had loved with his whole heart, keeping nothing back. There weren't many people in this awful world like him. And people like Scott Summers shouldn't end up with a broken heart and shattered life. People like him should live a fairy-tale 'happily ever after' life.

Still lost in my thoughts, I remembered that I had always harbored a slight curiosity about the man behind the visor, but I had never tried to get to know him or become his friend because (A) Logan resented him and would have been angry if I wanted to be friends with him…and I didn't want Logan angry at me for anything under the sun (B) Jean probably would have thought that I was trying to be his friend for other reasons—which I wouldn't have. I respected people who were in relationships, and anyway, it wasn't as if I could have ever posed a threat to anyone. I was Rogue, the Untouchable.

We reached his bedroom without me even realizing it. The only thing that gave it away was that he had stopped, and I stopped as well and pulled out of my dismal thoughts to see why he had. For a split second I felt keen regret that he would be leaving me to my own thoughts once more.

Scott turned to open his door, and then he turned once more, looking uncertain for some reason or the other. "You still think of Wolverine." I nodded silently and then he continued. "I still think of Jean." He lowered his gaze before raising it once more and looked at me. I could feel his eyes on me, something that surprised me. His voice was low and hoarse with sadness when he spoke again. "I don't want to be alone tonight."

I understood him immediately, because I didn't want to either. He wasn't asking for a night of passion, he was asking for a night in the company of someone who could understand him. That's when I realized that so did I. So nodding silently, I followed him into his room, despite the fact that this would seem so improper to everyone in this school and that Logan would kill me if he ever found out.

When the door closed behind me I looked around Scott's room. This was the first time that I had ever seen inside of it, and the presence of Jean that still lingered there hit me hard. He still had her pictures on the wall, and the opened door of the closet showed that her clothes hadn't been moved. And on the beauty table I saw makeup and different female beauty products. My heart went out for this man, who loved Jean so much that he hadn't been able to get rid of her things, no matter how many months had passed.

The light went off and he went to his bed and laid down. There was a moment of awkward silence as I just looked at him, watching him as he took off his visor—keeping his eyes closed tightly—and put on a sleeping mask. Once more my heart yearned to comfort the man who couldn't even sleep without fearing that his eyes would kill someone or hurt himself.

Walking towards the bed, I let my housecoat fall to the floor and I went under the sheets, realizing that Scott seemed to like the Air Conditioning as well. Since sleeping looking at him would probably be awkward for both of us, I turned so that my back was facing him, and I placed one arm under the pillow, turning it slightly so that I also had my other hand draped over it.

The moments of silence dragged on as I looked at his door, wondering if we should have locked it. Then again, no one would come barging into his room, so that thought was quickly erased. So, my eyes roamed the right half of the room, and they took in all the little touches of Jean that made this room still theirs.

Scott moved slightly behind me and I felt his hand go around my waist in a gesture that showed he was trying to comfort while receiving comfort for a while as well. Knowing that there was nothing sexual in this, I allowed him to hug me from behind and fall asleep in that position. I allowed him to dream that it was Jean he was sleeping with and not me. But surprisingly, I realized that this contact was making me feel better than I ever had.

Deciding that as long as I didn't roll in my sleep he was safe, I began nodding off to sleep. The last thing I remembered before sleep conquered me was Scott holding me closer in a protective and loving embrace. For the first time since I could remember, I fell into a peaceful sleep which lasted the whole night through with a contented smile upon my face.

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I hope that you enjoyed it! PLEASE REVIEW! PLEASE! I LIVE OFF OF REVIEWS AND CUPS OF NOODLES! Lol.