All right, so this was inspired by the song Fairytale Gone Bad by a finnish band called Sunrise Avenue.
Disclaimer: I don't own ER or any of the characters
He couldn't stand it anymore.
He could hear her crying, short muffled sobs.
At one point the sound would have made him break, now they made him want to walk out and never look back.
It was like a fairy tale gone bad.
Unattainable girl, guy completely in love with her, girl married prince in army uniform...prince in army uniform died noble death...girl tried to run from guy...guy finally caught up with her.
They were untouchable, living their happily ever after.
Except their happily ever after fell apart.
And now everynight she cried and he sat on the couch staring at the television trying to drown out the sound.
They had been through so much before they were finally able to be together...and now it all seemed a waste. Sometimes he wondered why he had wanted her so badly, why he had turned away other oppurtunities because he was waiting for her.
She was perfect...that's why.
They had just both made stupid irreversable mistakes. Stupid irreversible mistakes that he wished could be erased.
He supposed that he had been the first one to completely screw their relationship over.
Her name was Amanda. She was blonde. Hazel eyed. Long legs. And her clothes screamed for attention. She was pretty much Neela's polar oppisite.
Somehow Amanda had managed to get into his head and somehow he had ended up kissing her...and somehow he had ended up seeing her more than once...and then of course Neela had seen him seeing her.
That's pretty much where the fairytale had started to go downhill.
Then Neela, and though no fault of her own, had gotten pregnant...and lost the baby.
That's pretty much where the fairytale crashed.
Because Neela, and this was her fault, decided to throw her wedding ring at him...while they were standing in the street. They had both watched as the ring missed him and bounced with a sober metallic clang into the storm drain. Talk about horrible luck.
Ray had insisted that he didn't mind buying her another one, Neela had suprised him by saying she wasn't sure if she wanted another one. Actually it was more like she had burst into tears, choked out something inaudible, and slammed the door in his face.
Needless to say things at work had been awkward. Everyone had found out about the Ray and the blonde scandal...now there was Neela walking around without her ring on.
Finally her incessant sobbing got to him and he knocked on the door to the guest bedroom which was going to be the nursery and which had now become her bedroom. "Neela sweetie..." the word slipped off his tongue even if it no longer held any meaning.
"Go away."
"Neela, maybe we should talk."
There was a shuffling and then the turning of the lock, her swollen eyes blinked up at him. "I think it's to late for that."
He ran a hand through his hair, unsure of what to say to her. It killed him that it had become so painful to talk to his own wife. Especially when he used to be completely in love with her. When he would rile her up just to hear her voice. Sighing he took a step back, "I don't think I want to even want to try to make this work anymore."
"Then don't," she snapped.
"All right then," shrugging he made for the door, grabbing his keys and jacket.
Neela made a motion to follow then stopped, "Where are you going?"
"Out."
"Are you coming back?"
He didn't say anything and she bit her lip then straightened herself up.
"Bye Ray."
"Bye Neela."
The door slammed behind him.
Neela stared at the door for a moment then lay down on the floor. She wanted to melt away. Wanted to be sucked into the floor, into nothingness. It felt like she was numb, like someone could kick her and she wouldn't feel it. Her eyes were open but she wasn't seeing, she was breathing but she wasn't living. Tears leaked down her face and she squeezed her eyes shut. She would rather be numb than feel pain...right?
She rubbed her ring finger with her thumb and let out a small cry when skin met skin rather than metal. For the first time in her life she truly wanted to die.
Stumbling into the ER Ray tried to compose himself, it felt like his head was ready to explode.
"Ray, do you know where Neela is?"
Turning to face Abby he shook his head, "No."
"What do you mean no?" Raising an eyebrow Abby felt a sinking feeling.
"No as in no I haven't seen her."
"As in you haven't seen her because you didn't sleep at your own place last night?"
He nodded, "Yeah."
"Well just in case you still care about her at all she didn't show up for work today."
His chest tightened, "I'm sure she's fine...probably just upset." Seeing the look Abby was giving him he sighed, "I'll be back."
He unlocked the door and stepped in, "Neela?"
There was silence.
"Neela, I came back." He opened the door to the master bedroom. Nothing.
Door to the guest bedroom. Nothing.
Bathroom door. Locked.
"Neela?" he tried the knob.
The door swung open, "what the hell are you doing?" Holding a brush in one hand and towel up in her other she frowned. "Shouldn't you be at work?"
"Shouldn't you be at work?"
"Considering my husband walked out on me and I feel like my life has completely fallen apart...no. I called in sick this morning." She stared at him for a moment, then rolled her eyes and shut the door.
"All right then, well...I'm headed back to work." He stared at the door. Even though he didn't really care now that he knew she was ok...well...for the most part. But he knew that he should at least pretend to feel something. "You uh...you need anything?"
The whirring of the blowdryer stopped and the door opened a crack. She poked her head out, "I need you to take all of your stuff and get it out of my apartment."
He blinked. "Your apartment? Neela..." he hit his open hand softly against the wall, clearly restraining himself.
Her expression didn't change. "Yes Ray, my apartment. Seeing as how you were the one to leave that makes it mine. So get your stuff and get out. You seemed pretty eager last night."
"You have got to be kidding me."
She smiled grimly. "Actually I'm not, so if you don't mind," the door shut again.
"You can't just kick me out!"
"You left Ray."
The blowdryer started up again and he leaned against the wall. Shit. He hadn't thought about that last night.
"Neela!" he knocked on the door, "Baby I really think we need to talk about this." And there went another term of endearment.
This time she didn't even bother turning the blowdryer off, "First off don't ever call me that again...second of all, I'm through talking with you."
He knew she was serious. The thing was, if he had a place to go he would get his stuff and get out as fast as he could. But he didn't have a place to go. Abby and Luka wouldn't take him in, not after Neela had caught him cheating. Same went for Pratt. And Morris. And everyone else he worked with. He could call Brett, but he wasn't sure if he was in Chicago at the moment.
Truth be told he hadn't thought it would be this complicated, stupid of him really. With a sigh he took out his phone and dialed Brett.
"Yeah man?"
"Listen...Neela and I..." he hesitated. What was happening to them? "Neela and I..." he really hadn't thought it would be this painful. He really hadn't thought of a lot of things.
"Ray, you okay?"
"Neela and I are splitting up." He felt a rush of remorse and relief.
There was silence and for a minute he thought that Brett had hung up on him. "Ray, what the hell did you do and why didn't you fix it?"
That wasn't what he had been expecting. "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Dude, you and Neela were like, meant for each other. I mean, I remember when all you could talk about was her and you didn't even realize it. You loved her man and I know that she loved you. And love like that doesn't just dissapear or whatever."
Since when did Brett make sense like that. "Look, it's over. I fucked up, she made mistakes."
"And you're telling me you don't love her enough to fix them?"
"Yes."
"You really must have fucked up."
Yeah. Yeah he had. "Listen, I was wondering if I could stay at your place until I can find myself another apartment."
"Is this because you got kicked out or because you're leaving her?"
"Would it make a difference?"
"You're my friend and all, but I know Neela...and I know she doesn't deserve you walking out on her."
"She kicked me out all right?"
"Seriously?"
"So it was more like both, but she did tell me to get my stuff and get out. Now can I stay with you or not?"
Lying on the couch Ray couldn't help but wonder why their ending couldn't have been a happy one.
So what did you think?