Bella could not even believe she was thinking this. How could she be having these wicked thoughts. She loved Edward…didn't she. She was so confused. He had tried to kill her, and she he was all she could think about. The love of her life, James.
She didn't tell Eddie but she had been seeing James' ghost in her bedroom late at night for a while now. No one else could she him, not even Mr Ed.
She couldn't take it any longer, she was going to leave , she couldn't go on pretending to be with him when her heart belonged to another man.
She picked up the phone and called Eddie C. "E to the C, I am calling off the wedding. You smell like an apprehensive beluga and I do not like your bronze/red hair. Don't you know carrot-tops are dying out? Why don't you go jump in a volcano. We live near Mt St Helens after all."
At this point she could no longer speak over Master Cullen's sobbing. "Why don't you love me anymore Alice! I was going to leave Bella for you. Wah ha ha…"
"Alice!! This is Bella you pasty assed freak who can even read his incoming call alert! I'm glad I'm breaking up with you! James is 4 times the man and 10 times the vampire you'll ever be! He can spit 12 feet, can you spit 12 feet? NO! So don't come back unless you get a real hobby and some new hair!"
She slammed the phone down and saw James mysteriously appear in the corner of her room as ghosts do.
"I'm sorry but I overheard you telling King Cullen that you were leaving him because you were in love with me. I'm sorry but I could never love you as I too am in love with Edd-ward. The whole world is in love with Eduardo, didn't you know. If you had married Red-Ed you would have been queen of the world. Suck shit to you."
At which point he disappeared to go stalk Ed C.
Bella was so sad she ate her television