First: I don´t own Naruto!!

The words at the start are a poem I wrote 3 years back.

Key: "Normal talk"

Thinking

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A Life worth saving

1. Truth, oh terrible truth

Feeling like the leaves in Wind

helpless

Falling during fall

Dying on the ground

miserably

Crying for the good old time

Companions dying everywhere

Beware

-it could be you

Everyone comes to a point in his life when you have to make a choice and a decision which will lead to your life in the future or your destruction. It's inevitable and cruel especially if you are a shinobi and want to live. Haruno Sakura, 20, medic-nin, had to make such a decision and it would bring her pain, no matter how she choose. At least, that was what she thought she had to do - choosing. She knew that, more clearly than anything right now. And it would determine her life as a kunoichi, her emotions and what was more important, the way her friends and the other people around her, would think about her.

The clearing was surrounded by high trees, birds chirping and the grass moving with the wind that blew through it.

It was a sunny, but also cloudy day and the rays of the sun that would normally warm Sakura's skin, where freezing and ridiculing her right now with their bright light. Her big green eyes were bigger than normal, her pink hair, her face, clothes and body were covered in blood, tears escaping her eyes, mixing with the crimson blood. No sound escaping from her mouth. She simply had no strength left to sob or scream out in agony.

But she couldn't care less. What was important right now was the smashed body lying in front of her. She looked into the weary eyes of her teammate which were unfocused and numb. Sakura knew that she had only one option left to save the friend lying before her and fighting for his life.

Healing him with my chakra and my enormous knowledge of medical jutsus. That´s the only way. Please. Don't die on me now.

Her team had been on a mission and was about to head back home when they were ambushed and there had been no time or chance for a suitable reaction. Sakura had nearly been out of chakra for some time and so was one of her three teammates. After this hard mission it was only natural to be glad to head back home, being able to regenerate from the injuries but this attack not only took them by surprise, but they were also surprised by the people they had been attacked by.

Konoha ninja. Focus, dammit!!

Sakura closed her eyes, but opened them wide the next instant. She realized, that she had to focus on the now, not on what happened before. She realized, that no matter how hard she would try to save him, her teammate would surely die.

No. Don't die. You promised me!!

He would die because he had protected her earlier, blocking kunai and shuriken which were meant for her and she had not been able to dodge because she had tried to heal another teammate whose fate is was to die.

Again.

Not wanting to face reality, Sakura made a few hand seals in attempt to heal him, wincing in pain when she recognized that her wrist and her arm were broken. But she didn't care. Sakura laid her hands together above the stomach of her teammate, green light emitting from her palms, trying to heal the injuries.

I have to try! I have to try! Even if it costs me my life, I will not loose another teammate!

But to no use.

Everything around Sakura went black after deep inside realizing in a short, painful, sharp flash, moments before she blacked out, that her teammate was already dead. His lifeless and dull eyes looking into hers.

I lost you.

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Sitting in her office and not really paying attention to the report in her hands, Tsunade, fifth Hokage and chief medic-nin, sighed in defeat and put down the report on her desk, taking the bottle of sake that she had been able to smuggle in the office without Shizune, her assistant, noticing and took a big sip of it. She turned away from her desk, looking out of the big window without paying attention to the city that lie peacefully underneath it and thought about the report she had read earlier that same day, thinking about the events that had occurred the last week.

Flashback:

Sakura and her team had been already late to return from the mission, that wasn't unusual for other teams, but it was uncommon for her. Tsunade got up from the desk, feeling uneasy and restless, having a bad feeling about it since the reports Sakura had sent back didn't contain any evidence that the mission wouldn't be finished on time.

Three hours later Tsunade was sure that something was terribly wrong, due to the fact that there were no news from Sakura. Calling Shizune in, she asked her to send a group of ninja consisting of medic-nin and jounin to find Sakura and her team.

Anxious waiting for their return with news from Sakura's team, Tsunade tried to concentrate on reports Shizune had brought in this morning, but failed. Daydreaming in her chair, she nearly fell off when Shizune burst in, the door crashing against the wall from the power Shizune had applied to it in order to open it in a hurry.

"Tsunade-sama! We have to hurry! Sakura was wounded on the mission!" Shizune shouted, while turning around back to the corridor without even looking back. Tsunade was already on her feet, hurrying behind Shizune to the hospital.

Leading Tsunade in the room Sakura had been brought to, Shizune rushed to the bed, switching place with the medic that had already started to treat Sakura's wounds.

Tsunade however, stood, frozen on the spot at the door, looking to the spot where Sakura lay, her face pale, fighting back the tears. Everything was blurry around her, and the medics around her moved as if they were in slow motion. Her stomach tightened painfully, then suddenly the feeling of having to throw up surfaced. She didn't even notice Shizune who was yelling and giving orders.

There she was, Sakura, the girl she herself had trained for years, the girl she had watched growing up, lying pale and bloodstained in a hospital bed, barely breathing and alive.

"Tsunade-sama! Tsunade-sama!" Shizune yelled, trying to get her attention. When one of the nurses left the room to get some supplies Shizune asked for, she ran into Tsunade, who snapped immediately out of her numbness, proceeded to the bed and helped Shizune to heal Sakura. Her injuries were even worse than Tsunade had expected them to be.

She had several wounds that looked like they had been inflicted by shuriken Sakura had not been able to doge in time so that they would streak her skin but not causing enough damage to kill her instantly. There were several wounds from kunai too. She had broken bones that already started to heal and some wounds that seemed like Sakura had tried to heal them earlier on her own.

Those wounds are older. Dammit. She reported that there were some injuries, but she forgot to mention that they were severe. And the others didn't mention that in their reports either. Dammit.

Focus. You have work to do. At least give her a chance to live!

It took 6 hours, several medics, Shizune and Tsunade, who refused to leave Sakura's side, until Sakura was out of danger. When they were finished and left the room, the Hokage saw a bunch of people sitting on benches, on the floor and leaning against the wall, waiting for news about their friend. Naruto, who was as loud as ever, blocked her way and asked how Sakura was, looking into her eyes with fear, while the other ones around looked up, waiting for Tsunade to answer.

"She is alright, but still unconscious. Go home. You can visit her tomorrow." She said, walking away. Shizune had informed her during surgery, that the remaining teammates had been found dead.

Naruto ran after her, preparing to ask more questions when she suddenly came to a halt.

"Don't, Naruto." she said without turning around. Naruto stopped, not because Tsunade yelled like he would have expected her to, because she didn't. Instead, her voice was tired, thin, pained and silent. Backing away from her, she continued to walk away, vanishing from his sight behind the next corner.

End Flashback

Six hours. If Sakura had not been a medic-nin herself, she would have died that day. And three good ninjas did die.

Tsunade sighed, again, when she thought about everything. The team that had found her apprentice and the others came back with alarming news. Evidence showed, that the group had been ambushed by at least two unknown ninjas. Ninjaswith the Konoha leaf symbol on their forehead protectorsBut they were not ninjas from the hidden leaf village. Tsunade had sighed in relief when Shizune had informed her later about this, but at the same time began to worry.

The identity of the shinobi stayed unknown even after some research and there were no hints that they had been missing-nins from other hidden villages who intended to attack Konoha, but there was no way to prove that or to find out.

Someone feigning to be a ninja from Konoha. Ts. What will it be next time?

I hate playing mind games and this kind of games I hate more than people who confiscate my gambling chips.

She had informed the council, the elders and the ninjas that were about to go on missions about possible ambushes and attacks from ninjas posing as shinobi from Konoha immediately, but so far, no more attacks were reported, but that didn't mean she had time to do nothing and to wait what happened next. That brought her back to Sakura.

It took Sakura 2 days to finally wake up and 2 more days to stay awake for more than 3 minutes without going back to sleep. Yesterday, Tsunade was finally able to speak to her about what happened. Sakura simply burst out into tears, sobbing into her pillow, not allowing Tsunade to touch or comfort her. On that day, the Hokage wasn't able to get an answer from her apprentice and left her alone, mourning for her dead teammates.

She would give her a day to recover a little before asking her again.

Apart from Sakura's emotional condition Tsunade was worried about the fact that Sakura refused to speak or allow anyone in her room except hospital staff.

I have to get an answer today. No more games. I have to know what happened. Sakura had one day to recover, that has to be enough.

Getting out of the chair and walking out of her office, Tsunade headed for the hospital.

"How is Sakura today?" She asked the nurse on the desk who handed her Sakura's papers.

"She still refuses to talk and she still doesn't want anyone, not even one of her friends in her room." The nurse answered sadly.

"I will take a look at her." Tsunade said, taking the papers with her and walking to Sakura's room. Opening the door, she saw Sakura sitting in her bed. Her head was resting on her knees which she had brought to her chest and embracing them. Her eyes were closed.

"Sakura." But she didn't answer, in fact, she didn't even react to her name. Tsunade walked over to her after closing the door.

Physically, Sakura was alright. Her injuries, as bad as they had been, were gone and her chakra level was up to normal. Emotionally however, Sakura was far away from being okay, in the end, she was the only one to survive out of her four man team.

I have no choice. I need to know.

"Sakura! Sakura!" Sakura moved her head a little when Tsunade's voice got louder. "I need to know what happen, Sakura. I know this is hard, but you have to tell me." She said with a now calm voice. "Everything you can remember could be important."

"We were ambushed and they are dead. I wasn't able to save them. Is there more to tell?" Sakura answered with a dull, emotionless voice, her eyes still closed. Tsunade sat down on the chair next to Sakura's bed, her elbows resting on her tights and her head resting on her entwined hands.

"Sakura, please." Moments of silence went by and Tsunade wanted to start talking again when Sakura finally opened her eyes and began to speak.

"There are no details I can provide. Everything happened very fast and there was nothing special or unusual except the forehead protectors, but you already know about that."

"Just tell me."

"We were able to end the mission with success. We destroyed the scroll. But Kazou and I were nearly out of chakra and we all were injured. When we headed out of the hideout we had found the thieves of the scroll in, we were attacked and got injured, all of us. I was able to heal most of it after we finished the remaining ninja off. I think we were reckless and the injuries we still had didn't help either to stay alarmed." Her voice was broken and her face grimaced in pain when the memories of her lost teammates rushed back into her head.

"Ryo was first. When we came to the clearing, there was a rain of kunai out of nowhere. Ryo was the first to die." Sakura shut her eyes, only to open them again, the pain she felt inside evident in her eyes.

"I had no time to react, but I was able to dodge the kunai anyway, but some of them sliced my arms and shoulders. Taro was able to dodge them too, but Kazuo was hit by two directly in the chest. He removed them and jumped out of the way. Then, on a branch, I saw the glimmer of metal in the sun and so did the others. Taro and Kazuo threw some kunai in that direction, but it seemed that they didn't hit anything.

I don't know what rank those shinobi were, but they were dumb enough to reveal their position to us, one of them even jumped down to the ground. When Taro saw his forehead protector, he let his guard down. I don't know where that shuriken came from, but they slashed his back deeply. I ran to him and I tried to heal him, but I knew that I couldn't do anything for him. Kazuo had protected me, blocking kunai while I examined Taro, but Kazuo pushed me out of the way when another shuriken flew past us he wasn't able to block." Sakura closed her eyes again by the mention of Kazuo's name.

"I can't remember the rest clearly, but we were able to kill one of them when another bunch of shuriken and kunai was lashing down on us out of a sudden. I wasn't able to move, I don't know why." Her voice was full of pain and emotions while the tears that had been in her eyes earlier began to flow down her cheeks.

"Kazuo protected me with his body and he got hit. I saw the blood running down his legs when he broke down. Several kunai were sticking out of his legs and chest." Her voice was barely a whisper now.

"I don't know how I got the other one, but suddenly he was down, dead and I went back to Kazuo but I couldn't do anything." She sobbed. " I couldn't do anything for him. I wasn't strong enough. I had no chakra left. Again."

"Sakura, I..." Tsunade's face was full of emotions, knowing what Sakura was referring to.

"Don't say you understand because you don't!" Sakura screamed suddenly. "You don't know anything!"

"Sakura, please, calm down..." Tsunade was feeling something was wrong, awfully wrong.

"I loved him!"

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So, what do you think of this chapter? Oh and, sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors...I am just human. :)