From the moment they laid eyes on each other, John knew that things weren't the same and never would be ever again. It was different from chatting online – where the words were hidden from meaning and expression by the stale text that were typed to and from a person. It wasn't the same as looking straight into a person's face and knowing that they could see every raw form of you. They could hear you speaking the words instead of reading them. They could see the expressions on your face and in your eyes as they stare at you.
It wasn't the same, John knew that.
Maybe it was the thought that Karkat had been able to see him and truly see him from the moment of his very birth that made John want to hide. It made him think back to all those times when he had acted as much of a child as he had secretely thought of himself. He was always ashamed, though he had never realized before. Ashamed that he was so much weaker than everyone else – always the wheel in the back that was there as a final-support but would never be needed.
"Sup, Egbert. Surprised seeing you here - thought you would stay with Harley." Dave was the first to speak up, startling John enough to turn his eyes away from the Troll that had captured them. It took a moment for him to collect his thoughts and feelings before he actually remembered that Dave had asked him a question and was waiting for an answer.
The sight of gray stone and gold shoes was all John could see as he turned his head down. The strange feelings were burning inside of him still - like a volcano awaiting to erupt. Everything was happening so fast – it was all too much. He hadn't thought much of it before, he had accepted his role in playing this game despite the warnings of how serious it truly was. All this time he had simply been playing without thinking.
The color of black was flooding his vision as his head tilted further down with his current thoughts. A dive so deep into the darkness that it felt like it was consuming him. It was grabbing him, mocking him, devouring him. Coming face to face with reality was like being hit in the face with a hammer. Reality was like facing the people he had chatted with online and somehow realizing that it was all too real for him to handle. It was more than just reading plain text on a Pesterchum window.
"John? Are you all right?" Rose had spoken up through the fog in his mind. She sounded a bit worried and it must have been because he had been lost in his thoughts longer than he had assumed. Time was giving him a very much unneeded and unnessecary headache.
"Dude. You're just standing there like a derp. Get a grip." Speaking of time - though he hadn't meant to make it sound as if his friend was the source of all his headaches. An arm was swung heavily on his shoulders, making him stumble with his arms grasping at Dave's strange red cape to keep himself steady.
"Dave!" John snapped and glared with what he hoped was the most serious expression that he could muster-up. Looking into the black shades that his best friend insisted on wearing just for 'ironic purposes' made him feel strangely nostalgic and not just the least bit upset. Despite how many times John screamed into his mind for him to stop, the tears came like a flood into his eyes and smeared the colors of his face like he was being erased from existance.
"Dude... Are you-" The tense expression on his face was notable, even with the stupid shades. The grim look with his lips pulled down and back over clenched teeth like he didn't know whether to be disturbed or frightened. But the eyebrows that were drawn so far past his glasses were proof enough that he was frowning so bad that it couldn't be irony. Which could be irony since it was the irony that it was because people wouldn't expect it? John never did understand the stupid irony crap. Which was crap. Crap, crap, crap like a repeated mantra that was actually running through his crappy head right now like crap.
"Dave. He's having a break-down. You're not helping him by displaying such expressions with your face and body. You're absolutely expositing complete lack of control over the situation which is something he does not need right now." The smooth voice of one Rose Lalonde crept into his raging mind as if she were a fish gliding into water. She was calm as she patted his head and murmered for him to relax as if she knew that it would all be okay. Which, being the Seer that she was, probably knew indefinitely.
Even as he was being turned and placed into a hug, the image of a deep-set frown and gold eyes that gazed deep into his own was unavoidable. He stood with the rest of the Trolls as they took part as the Peanut Gallery who simply stood awkward and confused over the whole situation that was taking place. It wasn't the same. The eyes were still watching him from behind smooth gray skin, a shade just slightly lighter than the other Trolls that stood beside him. The eyes seemed to pierce right through him as everything else just faded away.
Somehow he had been taken and placed into a bedroom admidst the chaos that had been brought from his break-down. He was laying in something wet and slimy, yet strangely comforting and relaxing at the same time. The last thing he remembered was Rose speaking with a woman clothed in green and a face that glowed as if someone had turned on a lightbulb. He didn't remember her name honestly. But what he did remember was what she had said about what he was being placed in and the rightful judgment he couldn't help but be happy for her to have.
He felt like he had lost all of his bones and turned into a pile of mush while his face pressed lazily on the rim of the pod. It was dark in the room he occupied, though John knew he wouldn't able to see without his glasses anyway. Silence rang through his ears as he just relaxed and thanked whoever was listening in his head for the state he was in. A soft murmer that clicked in a strange growl snapped him from whatever daze his mind had been in and made him aware of the shift in shadows that was beside him.
"They seriously put you in that fucking thing?" The voice broke out after another growl had sounded just right beside his ear, though John was too much in a state to react properly. All he could say came out more like a sound of a grunt and moan than the actual word he had been intending. His eyes furrowed then at the strange feeling that was running through his body. It came as a soft flutter of feeling before it began to feel like a tickle. From a soft tickle it progressed into an electrical current that ran through his body in a humming sensation. If he hadn't been so sluggish and bone-dead, he would have giggled.
"Fucking seriously. You sound like a fucking feline craving catnip." John strained to understand the words despite how tired he was. Though the words came to him with an angry vibe that they normally associated with, there was something deeper in the voice that spoke to him. Fingers ran along his face with an aimed and intentional sharpness to cause pain. His mind screamed at him to get up and fight but he was too tired. All he could manage was a whine as he tried to move away from the dull pain.
"I fucking hate you so much. You have no fucking idea how much I just want to fuck you up. You look so fucking pitiful and I just fucking hate it so much!" It was a growl filled with flashing teeth in the darkness that were soon bared into his face; it was as though he were an animal proving a point through body-language and John would have been pretty stupid not to understand. Fingers burrowed themselves into the slime-covered black hair and, with a strong-grip, began to tug his head back into the slime. The panic was just enough for him to react out of his stupor.
"Let go, Karkat! Asshole!" John tugged at his wrists in a vain effort to make him let go. There was a hiss of breath that became a final warning before his face was submerged deep in slime. He choked on the goo that flooded his throat; he was breathing it in through his nose and mouth before he could even think to stop himself. He was thrashing about before he was even aware that his body was responding. After what seemed like forever, his head was brought back to the surface with a loud gasp for breath.
"Look at you. Fucking pathetic. Do you know how much I fucking hate you? You have absolutely no fucking idea! From your horrid blue eyes to those irritating glasses that try to hide those smug fucking eyes. Every fucking part of you is disgusting." The words were being raged into his ears like poison. Even as he was being lifted painfully over the pod and thrown to the floor with a loud thump of impact, John could still heard those words like he was being preached to.
The darkness couldn't hide the glow of eyes as they looked down on him from his curled up postion on the floor. He held himself up by the forearms with a head titled back to look up at the Troll before him. The normal hue of gold that John had familiarized himself with as being normal Troll eyes were now burning like coals from the excitment as they gazed down at him. It made him feel small and pathetic as he laid there with goo dripping from his clothes and hair. Not only that, but being looked down on made him feel angry beyond words. His short stature already made him feel self-conscious enough and he was sure that Karkat would most-definitely know this about him. He had watched him through a computer screen the entire thirteen years of his life to know even the most smallest of details. He couldn't stand him!
He couldn't stop his anger fast enough, "Shut up you asshole!"
A subtle shift and a mouth full of razor-sharp teeth grinning at him with eyes narrowed in mockery was the only response he was given. John knew he was only trying to get under his skin to piss him off. He was trying to get him to react in a way that he was intending. They both knew each other enough to know this. They both also knew that John wouldn't be able to restrain himself – no matter how much he tried to talk himself out of it.
So it was with a shout that John made the first move to attack - even though they both knew what was going to happen. A face full of gray stone along with the green goo that had been splattered all over the floor in puddles came without much surprise but still happened to be extremely painful. He was left gasping for what ever breath he could manage without breathing in the goo that was threatening to flood into his mouth once again. A body framed his own with too much weight to simply be thrown off, so John was forced to stay in the position until he let him up – if he ever did, that is.
"Look at you. Right where you fucking belong." The laughter was deep and short, but rang with a slight echo through the room and into his ears, "I always knew you were my fated Kismesis. But fuck, I never thought you were this easy. Fuck are you being so pathetic for, Egbert." Hands tightened in his hair leaving nails to scrape at the sensitive skin as they grew tighter and tighter. John could only hiss and arch his back in an effort to lessen the pain, which brought more laughter ringing.
"So fucking easy, Egbert. The fuck. Do you want me to fucking dominate you like the fucking little bitch you are? Fuck you, Egbert. Fuck you, you pathetic piece of fucking shit." The goo gave a soft hazy glow of green that just barely qualified as a light in itself, but seeing it convinced John that it was just enough to make the sitution that more as something from a horror flick. A moan broke his raging thoughts, the whispers and growls filled with words of hate were being voiced into his ears like a mantra.
A bare hand stroked his side heatedly with a feeling of skin that could neither be called soft or rough but maybe something in between. There was nothing to compare it with, though it left goose-bumps rising along his skin from the feverish heat and the sudden cold as his hand passed. Another hateful word was spoken just up and along his spine as a hand lifted his shirt up and off to be thrown away. The feeling of a volcano was burning inside of him, or maybe it was just Karkat that was the volcano. He grunted as his face was pressed even more firmly into the stone beneath him.
Even though the forced dominance had been unexpected and more than just a bit painful, the nails that dug into his scalp and the body that pressed heavily down on his was enough to make him feel aroused. He felt the sudden tightness of his pants just as he felt the sharp nips and kisses being placed on the sensitive pathway that was his spine. It made him flinch and yet groan as he felt the bites and the licking that came after; as though he were apologizing for being too rough, though John doubted that was the case.
The bites were getting lower and the further down they went, John could just feel himself losing the strength to keep on his knees. A jerk of the hips that were being thrust forward and into him was enough to knock him onto his chest with his arms outstretched in front of him. The floor was cool on his heated skin, enough to make him aware of how flushed he must look. The thought of Karkat being able to see him only made him flush deeper for a completely different reason.
With each thrust from Karkat, John was aware of his body being thrown by the force and jerked back into place by the hands on his waist. The pants he was wearing were now proving to be more of a pain than he could have ever imagined before as they grew tighter and tighter around him. His nails dug into the cool stone as he began to mindlessly beg for help. Something like this was beyond him, having never felt such heat before in his life. His stomach felt tight and there was pressure building somewhere further below. He was going to burst!
"Not fucking yet." Each word came with a gasp of breath as it became a sentence. There was no more movement except for the hands that were being brought to the front of his pants. The tightening in his stomach lessened as time passed and John could only grit his teeth with a hiss of frustration. He had been so close! To what, he didn't really know. But that pressure was still there and it was slowly driving him crazy with a need to allieve it.
His bare back was being pressed against a similar feel of skin, though it was the strange type of skin that Trolls just seemed to have. But John could feel the heat flushed against him that only seemed to make him even more excited. The lack of tightness and the cold that struck him with surprise was only a further cause and reason to make him excited enough to feel that sudden pressure again. Unaware as his body arched, only feeling that pleasure ringing through his body as he was prepared for whatever was building up inside of him. The heat was just too much to handle.
His bare legs folded and it was only then that he came to the senses of something just as nude as he was to be touching him. The shock of it was enough to tear that building pleasure away and replace it with absolute terror. Arms wrapped around him and grasped at his wrists right before he made any movement to get away; leaving him with Karkat forcing his arms to hang straight down his sides. A breath of hot air and a pair of teeth latching onto his ear came in tune with John's muffled sobs as he shook with fear.
"See, didn't I fucking tell you?" A hot, leathery tongue wrapped around his ear and brought it into the wet cavern filled with sharp teeth that was known to be Karkat's mouth. His whole body was deflating though, feeling no pleasure from the act as he had earlier. While John may not be aware of his own body and their functions, that didn't mean he was naive to what was the intention behind such as acts.
The feeling of thighs and legs working to spread his own was enough to lose him in his panic. He struggled violently against the Troll, knowing rationally that it was a pathetic attempt but couldn't seem to wrap his mind around it all the same. The feel of something slick and sticky over his thigh made him choke on the scream that he had finally managed a nerve to make. It stroked up his thigh and left a trail of what felt similar to the green goo, but was textured with a more smooth type of liquid.
"Stop, stop, stop! Please, please! Karkat, I'm not- I've never-! Please, stop!" He began to beg as he hiccupped and sobbed to the point that it was making him choke and wheeze. Even with the darkness and the vision that came out blurry, John could see past his pale thighs to Karkat's light gray skin that was his hip. Between his thighs was something that appeared like a bulging tentacle, but it was smooth and it was layered with a diluted redness that dripped from the even darker red colored bulge.
As though it was aware of him staring, it moved to curl around his own wilting erection. He was too afraid to move so all he could do was watch and feel the vibrations that rang through the strange bulge. It was a strange stinging sensation, almost painful but felt pleasurable all the same. It made him calm and brought his erection back to life. Made the cold that had begun to seep into his bones disappate and warm with a heat that John found that he had so desperately missed. His head titled back as his voice broke out into a moan.
Karkat was strangely silent as he stroked his thighs in a soft and gentle movement that was so unlike the rougher treatment from earlier. It seemed to last only a bit longer, before there was a grunt in his ears and sharp tear through his shoulder as he was bitten. It made him jerk upright in surprise but gave him enough of an unexpected courage to retaliate. He sat down roughly on the bulge that was no longer smooth and slick, but drenched and ravage as it clenched and slapped him painfully.
There was a sharp sound before he was shoved off roughly, back down to the floor with his forearms barely holding him up as his ass was held high in the air from his knees. A squelching sound that would have made anyone embarrassed to hear but John found strangely alluring and antagonizing was the only warning given. While John cried out with an angry and pleasurable shout from the feeling of a red bulge pushing through his tight ring of muscle, the opposite was for the pleased Karkat who moaned as loud as he could in nothing but raw pleasure.
It was slightly painful for John, but the bulge happened to be so naturally drenched with enough lubricant that it made the whole process so much more easier and pleasurable. It stroked his inner-walls and squirmed its way inside as though it had a mind of its own. John could only moan as he felt cum slide down his legs and drip from the erection that was at full height from arousal. A few times the bulge propelled itself with a shove that made it extremely painful before it went back to its eager strokes. Like a mantra, as though it were reminding him of the words Karkat had spoken before. The Quadrant that this belonged to. This was Hate-Sex, not love or pity. They were Kismesises and have always been fated as such.
It made his fists clench among his folded arms as he felt Karkat becoming eager with his thrusts; starting up slowly before they began to accelerate with speed and violence. He gritted his teeth and forced his hands to lay flat on the stone as he jerked his body back to meet one of those violent thrusts. The cold air hitting his back was a sign of Karkat moving to sit up and pound more firmly into him, John making sure to bring more challenge as he made sure to meet each thrust with precision.
He wasn't experienced, he knew that. While John didn't understand the whole Quadrants deal and what exactly it was that he was doing, he just couldn't help but go for the moment. He knew Karkat hated him in a way that was very similar to a violent love, it could even border on abuse had it not been for the vibe John got from it that stated otherwise. This wasn't abuse, it was just a reflection of love. A reflection of love that was hate, but had to be reciprocated to happen.
Abnormally sharp nails dug into his back and drove a series of red lines all the way down his sides just as he clenched his muscles around the bulge in a squeeze bordering more on painful than pleasurable. The thrusts between them became frantic and John was moaning as loud he could with a Karkat that was growling even more louder in attempt for more competition. They were both trying to outdo the other, both determined not to lose.
John was the first to cum, given his lack of experience and fragile-human body. He came all over himself and the floor with Karkat giving no sign of slowing down. The bulge was nearly bigger than it was when it had first been pressed and forced into him. It was swelling inside of John with enough size to make him open his mouth and gag at the feeling it gave. Fingers took advantage of the opening to shove themselves deep into his mouth and press him backwards in an arch that brought extreme pain as he was jerked by the now barely-considered thrusts.
The bulge inside him was no longer moving and niether was Karkat, though he was spazzing against him. From the way his body was bent, John found himself looking deep into the smoldering red eyes of Karkat who bared his teeth at him and wiggled his fingers that were inside his mouth. The violent jerk against him and a flutter of eyelids was all that was left of Karkat as the bulge inside him burst. Hot liquid cum flooded his walls to streak down his thighs and splatter the floor where they both knelt upright in a spoon.
His knees shook from the strain of it all and would have fallen if Karkat wasn't the one holding him still. The tentabulge slithered inside of him one last time before it began to slide out of him with a feeling that made John shiver and cause goosebumps to rise along his arms. John drooped exactly at the moment when Karkat lessened his grip, hanging by a muscled arm wrapped around his stomach. He was stuck in that position as he was lifted and carried back to the pod. Dripping a hazy-color of green and a diluted color of red the whole way.
As he was sinking back into the green goop that glowed slightly brighter and hummed like it was being overflown with electricity, he saw Karkat watching him with eyes more gold than red. With one swoop, his hair was being gripped in a clawed hand and his face was being forced in a closer proximity of Karkat's own. A kiss that contained more teeth than tongue was instigated and John pushed himself into returning it just as savagely. They parted with Karkat shoving him away and turning his back on him to make his way to the door and leave.
John spoke his words as much as he could from his daze.
"I hate you, asshole."
Red eyes gleamed at him from across the room before the pearly whites were shown in a grin directed at him. A hand lifted a pair of clothes by a height that made John able to see them as his own before they were thrown across the dark room with a chuckle. His eyes shone with malice as John glared with whatever energy he had left. The clothes landed and then the room was as silent as it had been before their activity.
The reply came as expected.
"I hate you more, you fucker."