Cheater
My hands shook. Beneath the glasses I rarely wore, eye strain became my worst enemy.
Gill took a sip of his tea.
I flinched.
Losing wasn't an option. His little game made me a mess. It had gone on like this for too long—way too long. And I was about to lose my mind. That might be worth mentioning.
It was in my favor. Heck, that made me more frustrated. There was no positivity in this game until a final cry of success.
Gill loosened his tie. "More tea?" His armed draped over the back of his chair a tad stiffly.
He refilled my teacup and made it just how I liked it. Lots of cream, and barely any sugar. He didn't wrinkle his nose this time.
My lips, dry as my hair in the morning, cried out for that tea.
I ignored the feeling.
The clock ticked. The room was getting darker, just like the outside world.
Okay. You've got this!
I met Gill's eyes and reached over. My body went through the usual motions. Breathing in, I smiled wide and whispered, "Checkmate."
I massaged my wrists and giggled to myself. In an attempt to show a little delicacy, I took my teacup and (after testing the temperature with the tip of my tongue) took a light sip.
"Angela. Checkmate."
A little tea went down my chin. I returned the cup to its plate, embroidered in gold, and squinted at that shining chess board.
Gill followed my eyes, then said, "Don't you have to get home? Tuck your chickens in?"
"Shhh." I pouted. "You trying to distract me?"
His lips tilted. "Am I?"
I couldn't even look at the board. The pieces blurred and I squinted as though I knew I was approaching a monster of some sort and didn't want to see it.
His queen—was it really wide open?
I postponed for awhile. Before now, I had thought that the peak of being frazzled was getting a fish off a hook…
"Okay, okay… Okay. Ah, you know, Gill…" I looked up and laughed. "I'm about to win?"
He said nothing.
I grabbed hold of my knight.
"Checkmate."
The clock gave a resounding tick-tock. I melted into the cushy cream armchair and rubbed my hair. It had been annoying me the whole time—too short for a proper ponytail, too long to be ignored.
When I opened my eyes, he was staring. Sky blue peepers woke the butterflies in my stomach. His hair, just a little out of place, was fixed with a white-knuckled brush of the hand.
He cleared his throat and moved forward. "You cheated."
"Did not!"
I slammed my hands on the table that I was once scared to touch (just like everything else in the house) for fear of dirtying it. My glasses slipped down my nose. "Take that back," I said. "I won. Fair and square. Me. Just like you did a million times, so…"
"What?" His ears went red. "You won—by distracting me."
"Uh?"
"Forget it. Enjoy your win, Angela." Gill pushed back his chair and clawed at his tie. "Forget it."
"Okay?" I rubbed my temples. "After all these months I've played… This makes me happy. I mean the least you could do is celebrate with me."
He deadpanned. To stop my words, I gulped down some tea. It was just a chess game. What was I getting so worked up over, anyway?
I looked to the door. My sweaty palms slipped off the table and into my lap.
He wasn't looking anymore.
"Gill… Explain it to me. I'm calmer now." His silence fueled an abrasive tone. "Are you?"
His face twitched.
Yes, I was expecting something. It was apparent in what he could see and what he couldn't. It was in the way I sat, at the edge of my seat, and in the exploding heartbeat fueling that motion.
"Yes."
"You're blushing. Y'know that?" I stood on weak legs. One of the pawns had fallen.
Gill got up the moment I moved. "Bathroom," he said, as though that explained everything. Then he was gone.
I put the pawn back and rubbed my lips. They were rough.
"I never cheated. Not even once." The clock was my only listener. "Pompous idiot."
"I'm smart enough to know that you cheated before." He returned to his seat and I shivered. His face was blank besides a blush I wished wasn't cute. "Let's clean up."
"Uh." My eyes narrowed. "You're giving me a headache."
"There you go again."
He took the silver case and began to return the chess pieces to it, carefully—as usual. It was obvious that it was Gill's most prized possession, not by how well-cleaned it was or by its artistic charm, but by how he handled it.
It used to calm him. Every time I started to bug Gill, he'd offer a "quick game." After the first time, I left flustered with my panties in a twist and a headache to deal with. Then the board was set every time I came. He'd sat, patient as a hunter, until I left. When the urge became too strong, I played with him again and again. It reminded me of gaining the trust of a cat I'd found when I was ten.
First, it was tea. Then it was leaning back in his chair. Then loosening his tie, which eventually loosened his tongue. When it felt like I'd reached the end of surprises that made my heart swell, I worked to make something happen.
You sure did that.
"What now?"
"You need to take care of yourself." He focused on the chess pieces and I fingered with the arm of the chair.
"You need to stop being bad for my health."
"Please just stop." Hands shaking, Gill put one of the pieces he'd picked up back onto the table. "You don't understand anything."
"Help me." I started moving my pieces to the open case. I couldn't stand looking at him. "Why does everything have to be so complicated with you, huh?"
"Don't minimize my emotions, Angela."
"Kind of hard to know if I am when you're holding them back."
I brushed his hand. His fingers pressed hard against the table. I rubbed them with my own.
He swallowed. "You're still cheating."
"I'm not."
"You have from the beginning." Gill's voice was level but his hand was having its own little earthquake. "You never got better at chess. You just kept on doing it."
He fell silent.
"Gill?"
"You just…" He tried to move his hand, only to falter. "I'm not being literal. The only thing I recall in that sense is when you knocked over a piece and put it in the wrong place."
I frowned.
"I worry so much and it drives me crazy." He closed his eyes. "I was forced to care less about finance and papers and business—because I can't concentrate unless it's about you. Not fair."
Gill's cold hand relaxed against mine.
Between the biggest smile of my life, I said, "Maybe I did cheat a little."
Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed.