"He's waking up."
"Don't be stupid. He can't 'wake up'. He's 'switching on'."
"It's practically the same thing." I could hear the two talking to each other as my eyes opened. Everything was screened red and monitors were scanning everything. I didn't really understand, yet I didn't need to. I looked at the two, letting my eyes scan them. "Hello. You're awake now, right?" I looked at the man on the left, the shorter of the two. It took only a few moments to find out information about him. C̝̱̳h̩̱͚̯r̠͉͉̘i̫̼̘̻s̤͖̤̪̻...that was his name. Yet, he's known as Trottimus. I wonder what that means. Various other information flashed in my vision, before I turned to the man on the right.
"He's not AWAKE. He's ON." He sighed, shaking his head. A̞̤̗̜l̥̮e͈̳̝̼̥x͕...known as Smith or Smiffy. Who are these people? I don't quite understand. Why did Chris say I was 'awake' and Alex say I was 'on'? What am I if they cannot decide on whether I am 'awake' or 'on'? "Anyway, why are you getting so friendly with him?" Alex asked. Chris shrugged, turning back to me. They both watched me with curiosity. How do I answer them? What did Chris say...?
"...Hello." My electronic voice was glitchy, whatever that meant. It went through various pitches until settling on a male tone. "Chris...Alex..." I looked at the two in turn. Chris smiled when I spoke, but Alex's expression didn't change. "Are you not happy, Alex?" He blinked, looking directly into my eyes. I tried to determine his expression, but I couldn't.
"You could say that."
"Why? Is something wrong with me?" I asked. Alex leaned back, running his hand through his hair. A slight smirk appeared on his face for a moment. He shook his head, glancing at Chris.
"No. There's nothing wrong with you." He replied. I wondered why he looked at Chris. Did he need conformation? Alex then stood, leaving the room. Now it was just Chris and I. I watched him look at me, and then his gaze shifted to a screen. I couldn't see what was on it, but I didn't ask either. It didn't concern me...I thought. I took this time to look around. There wasn't much to the room – four walls, a door, the operating table I was laying on and the electrical equipment lying around. I looked at my 'h͈̰a͖n̺̣̬̼̪̱d̪͉͈ṣ̫͖̠̻'. They were different to others...my right hand was mechanical, sparking a little. This was normal, so I didn't question it. But questions were all that I had.
"What am I?" I asked. Chris turned to me, walking to my side. He sat down on the table beside me, watching me. "Am I like you, Chris?" His hands clenched around my mechanical one. "Am I 'awake'? Or am I 'on'?" Chris sighed. I could see he was tired but I don't know whether he wanted me to know or not.
"You're not like me. Not fully." He started. Was this painful? P̙a͚͔̮͎iͅn̮̝̥...what is pain? "We tried to make you as 'human' as we could." H̲̬͕u͙̟̱̻ma̖͙̬n̞̥...is that what they were? Human? I must not be human, then, if they tried to make me human. "You're an android." A̦͔̥͞n̴̘̝̳̗͔d̩̬̤̪̮̫̀r̩̦̬͙͎͎̱o͍̫̠͝͡i͚̟͜ͅd̢͉͇͕̱͔̹̦̠̼͢͞? "Basically you're a robot that's made to be human." So I'm...a robot? Does that explain the extent of machine parts and electrical wires? A robot...what is that?
"What is...a robot?" I heard a little chuckle from the man. "Was that funny?"
"I guess we haven't quite finished you. You still don't understand much, but that's fine. You're awake before the others were anyway." Others? Interesting – they have tried this before. "We'll make you better. Soon you won't even realize you're an android. You'll be human, like us." This worried me for some reason.
"Why?"
"Why? Don't you want to be human? People will be scared, TERRIFIED, of you if they saw you like this." Chris replied, shock in his expression. His expression then changed from shock to...a͇̠̟n̰̮̬g͖͚̭̟͕e̦̗r̬̻̪̫̣̞̞͎? "No. You can't keep asking questions like this! We'll make you human! You won't be like this!" Why was he angry? I almost asked, but he said I couldn't ask questions. I looked at my robotic hand encased within his human ones. Was it so wrong to be what I am? A robot?
"...If...if nothing is wrong with me...then why can I not be myself?" I asked bravely. Brave... "Alex said there was nothing wrong with me, yet you say I can't be like this." I explained logically. "So...either something IS wrong with me, and Alex was lying, or you don't like me being different." Chris' hands let go of mine. He stood up, not replying. I caught the dark look on his face as he returned to the monitor.
"You've been on enough. Time to sleep, Ross." He muttered, before everything went black.
[W̘a̜̻̜̼̟̼͓̪̤r̩̘̟n̟̻͓̣͎ͅi̼̯͇̘͍͓͙͍n̜̰͉̦g̮̖̜.̖̯̻͖̗ ̱̼͍E͓̟̰͍̙̻͉ͅn̻̬͖͍e͇͍̗̹̦̺͖̖̱r̩̣̜̗͚͔g̙̠y̰͇͚ ̟̠͉ḻ̖̙͇͖̼e͈̘v̪̳̬̞͕ͅe̹̱͓̙̲̺̗̙l̼̟ ̯̱̘c̤̱̝̥͍͍͖̰r̲̫̤̙̻̲͉̰͓i̫̳̣ͅt͇͇̙͖͍̝i̜̹̱̱c̱͕a͖̱̳͎͔ͅl̰̗̝͇̳.̣͍̮͉̼̯̻ͅ]
"Get back here!" I ignored him. Why should I listen to him? He wanted to change me. He wanted to make me different. Why should I listen to him? Alex...maybe he has a different opinion. Does it matter, though? If I run into him, I'll ask. If not, then this is goodbye. Goodbye...I wonder why humans say that to each other. Four days since I was first activated and I'm running. I had to escape. Chris wanted to change me...I wouldn't let him. I apparently also had a name – it's what Chris kept calling me. R͖̦͇͉͔̻̙o͓͕͈s̝͖̥̜̺̯̱sͅ. Why was that my name? It was given to me...is that how a name works? You're just given it? I suppose... I have researched it. A name is given when a child is born. Yet I was not born, so why do I need a name? Maybe I should discard it...but I would need to say a name to humans. After all, Chris had managed to cover up most of my robotic parts – except my right hand. That stayed robotic, exposed to the world. It was sparking like crazy. It could electrocute anything I touched. That might be useful. I glanced back, seeing no sign of Chris. I was too fast. I was already a few miles and more from the facility. The place they kept me...I even built it. I don't remember how, or why, or when...I just did. It must have been when I had no consciousness. I shouldn't be like this now, but I am. Too many questions...Chris would scold me. Chris...why do I care about what he thinks? I'm free now. Free. I held my chest, feeling a strange feeling. What is this? Am I not functioning right? Maybe this was pain... Chris had implanted feelings, emotions, into me. Why? I didn't want them. I wish I could delete them. I rarely saw Alex. I wasn't sure what he was doing; whether he liked me or not. Though...he was more kind than Chris, but I didn't realise that would be the case. At first Alex sounded distant, but maybe he was protecting me somehow. I hear beeping inside my head, not slowing down as I heard him.
"Escaping, that's new."
"I had to get away, Alex. Chris was just..." I didn't really know what to say. "How are you talking to me anyway?"
"Come on. I get to mess around with you as much as Chris does." This put me on edge, but it wasn't too bad. I trusted Alex more than Chris. T̼͕̤̞͍̪r̭͓̠̰͔̥us̭͙̣̼̻̫t...I'm supposed to be a robot. I don't want to be human. "Anyway, he was getting too possessive over you. If you didn't do something like this, I would have stepped in." Rain began to fall, so I had to keep my hand under my clothes. Otherwise it would get damaged.
"Alex, what do I do now?" I asked, my voice sounding tired. "Chris...he gave me these useless feelings. I'm getting tired, weak...what do I do?" I was getting desperate. Another useless human trait. These useless...useless...
"Just keep going, Ross. I'm tracking you right now. I'll come find you." I had to do what he said – keep going. Running as fast as I could, never looking back. Soon I found a forest, which would be easy to hide in. I needed to hide – I couldn't run. I sat under a tree, hidden in darkness. The rain fell all around while I sat in this dark forest. Chris...I want to k̮̲i̜͓̜l̻̜̖ḻ̞̙̠̙ you. "Why have you stopped?!" I growled, clenching my robotic hand into a fist. Now Alex was starting to get on my nerves.
"Because I'm tired!" I shouted, not caring who heard me. "Don't you get tired, Alex? I've got your fucking useless feelings now, thanks to Chris! I wish I had escaped sooner, so I wasn't infected with these useless emotions and feelings!" I held my head, which was beginning to hurt. "You humans...why did you do this to me?" I whispered, curling up.
"Ross, calm down. You're going to damage yourself! Just calm down. If you've been made into a human, breathe. Slowly, in and out." I didn't want to, but I did as he said. It helped, somehow. I didn't need the air to breathe – I didn't need to breathe at all. But I was somehow better off while doing this meaningless action. "That's it. You're feeling better now." How he knew I didn't really care at the moment. "I'll be there soon, alright? Then we can sort you out." Fine, whatever. Nothing seemed right anymore anyway. I just stayed on the floor, curled up. I'm too human. Why? Too many questions... Ngh... Why do I care? Another question... I closed my eyes, hoping that this was just a 'dream'. Chris had given those to me too. But this was more a nightmare. Fuck...stop.
"He must be in there somewhere!" My eyes shot open, hearing his voice. No...Where's Alex? He should be here, not Chris! How did he find me?! No! There's no time! I had to move, or I would be dragged back there. I stood up, and took off running. "Search everywhere! We need to find him!" Who was he talking to?! Other robots, like me? Humans? Did he have an army? Why did this happen?! I tripped and stumbled, still running through the dense forest. "Come on! Move faster!" The constant shouting...it's clear in my mind. I was scared. I had no reason to be, apart from that my robotic side would be lost. Is that such a bad thing...? Why did I want to hold onto it so deeply? This side of me... It has only brought me problems. Maybe...
"Don't slow down!" No. Those were the thoughts from the desperate side of me – the human side. These two humans...why were they so conflicted? They wanted to create me together, right? So why did they not agree on whether I should be human or robot? Surely they should have decided that before creating me, and the others? If there are others.
"Alex...why did you create me?"
"..."
"What's wrong?" I was curious. He sounded like it was hard to say, or something he didn't want to. "Tell me, Alex. What is my purpose?"
"...Our friend died." Their friend died?! "Chris...he wasn't happy. I loved him and everything, but he still needed the third person. Ross...oh, people used to say he was a spare part. But...not to us. We needed him; when our rivalry was excessive, our love too open...he was just there when you needed him." Chris...made me...to be their friend again? That's why...my name... "I agreed at first...but it's wrong. We can't bring him back. You were going to be perfect." P̼̼͓͔er̲f̦̫̱̥̹̮ec͙̰t̥̯̫͉̟̹? "Chris had everything perfect about you. Exactly how he was. But...I couldn't let him. I...tampered with you. Made it so you didn't want to be human. We can't just bring Ross back. We need to let him go. Chris needs to." All this information swirled in my head. I was...supposed to be their friend. I was going...to be perfect. But...Alex...changed me. Chris...just wanted his friend back.
"Why couldn't I be him?"
"It would constrict us again." Co͓ns̭t̺̱̯̜̠̘r̘̰̹i̥̜̜̖͇̞̟c͔̳̳̹͎ṭ͇̪̘̼̯? "When Chris didn't have this fucking idea in his head, we could be happy together. I loved him more than anything...but he was always sidetracked. Whenever I tried to show him, he would just ignore me and think about Ross. About his death... He needed to let go!" This was the first time I heard Alex angry. I soon felt the rain on me again, running faster. I could see lights in the distance; a settlement of some kind. I could hide there, for a while.
"I'm sorry, Alex. I...I didn't..."
"No. You had the right to know."
"I've found some kind of settlement. I think I should stay here for a while."
"Sounds like a plan. Has Chris seen you yet?"
"He was getting close, but no. I don't think he's seen me."
"Good. Just find somewhere to stay for a while, to lay low. You don't need to eat or rest, but you need to recharge. Try to find a source of electricity. Shouldn't be too hard."
"Alright. See you later." I slowed down at the edge of the settlement. It turns out it was a city. Perfect. I could find plenty of places to recharge here. I slid down the semi-steep slope that led towards the city. It seemed quiet; it was around 1am and it was particularly dark. Nobody was around at this time in the morning – apart from the drunks, of course. I kept my hand under my clothes so I didn't scare anyone. Looking around, I didn't see anything at first that could be useful. I couldn't see any lights or wires. 'Inside...somewhere.' I thought, looking at the buildings. Which looked the most public? I couldn't go into the town centre or anything like that; it'd be shut. I could try sneaking in, but it would attract too much attention if the alarms went off. I couldn't try a house. Everyone would think I'm crazy, or something. A shop! That could work! Quickly, I made my way into a supermarket that was still open. Open 24 hours a day? Wouldn't they get tired? I shrugged to myself, glancing around. I decided to act like I was shopping, which seemed a bit pointless. All I needed was e̹̫n̦̬̘̦̬̯ͅe̬r̻g͈y̗, and here I was playing shops. A socket would do. But where do you find a socket in a shop? Where do you find electricity in a shop? I couldn't just grab onto the lights and take the electricity – there were cameras watching. Fucking questions! Why don't I just do it? I'm a fucking robot; surely I can get away afterwards?! I glanced at the lights, watching them. I could see the energy in them; it was so tempting. But what did Alex say? 'Lay low'? I think that means 'don't draw attention to yourself'. So, just taking electricity from the lights is out of the question. Damn it Alex... Wait. I was going to be rash...that's a human trait... I don't want to be human.
"Can I help you?" I heard a voice beside me, turning to look. It was one of the workers. After scanning, and reading, I learnt her name was Kim͓̻̞̞͍ͅ. "You seem a bit lost." I wondered how I should answer her.
"Well...I was trying to find...some...electricity." I replied hesitantly. I watched Kim's expression change, knowing that it was 'confusion'.
"Electricity?" I nodded. "What do you need electricity for?" Blinking, I glanced away. Should I tell her the truth? Would she even believe me? Well, I had proof, so that didn't matter. I didn't know what to do. Taking a deep breath, which I didn't need, I decided to tell her.
"I'm...an android."
"...You're kidding?"
"No." The look on her face was of disbelief. "Look..." I moved my hand very slightly, so only a part of my mechanical hand was showing. Her expression changed from disbelief to...well, I couldn't quite work out what. Awe? Fear? It didn't matter; I needed help. "Please...someone's trying to find me. They want to take me back to where I ran away from." I whispered. She didn't look like she wanted to help. "All I need is some electricity to recharge and then I'll be gone." Kim crossed her arms in front of her chest, thinking. After a few moments of silence, I heard a reluctant sigh as she nodded.
"Alright, but you do as I say. Just follow me." She replied, as she began to lead me. I obediently followed, almost feeling like I was with Chris again. No, Kim was nice. She's helping me. "So, you got a name?"
"Ross." It was almost forced, but I remembered what Alex had told me and I was almost proud to have the name.
"Ross...that name sounds familiar." Kim shrugged. "No matter. The name's Kim." She replied. I nodded, even though I already knew her name. She led me through some doors, pointing to a socket. "That's all you need, right? No wires, no...I dunno." I nodded again, kneeling down beside the socket. I looked at my robotic hand. 'This should work...' Slowly I put my metal fingers into the socket and switched it on. Suddenly I felt better – not tired or weak. So I was truly robot. Good. After I had had enough, I turned the switch off and faced Kim.
"Thank you, Kim."
"You're welcome. Now get out of here." I smiled, waving to Kim as I rushed out. Although I had a bad feeling something would happen to her.
I decided to sit at the outskirts of the town, watching the lights. It was getting brighter, so soon the lights wouldn't look as pretty. I felt energized and could go on for a long time. I still hadn't heard from Alex, but neither had I heard from Chris. So it was both bad and good right now. But...something inside me was in conflict. Now I didn't know whether I wanted to go with Alex, and destroy my human side, or go with Chris, and be their friend that they lost. I wonder what he was like. I guess Chris didn't get far enough to put his memories in me. Maybe that's what I needed. Memories; ones that replace this experience. Bother ways had benefits and consequences. But which outweighed the other? My humanity or mechanization; that was the choice. It was like Alex was the machine side and Chris was the human side. Who should I listen to?
"Ross." Speaking of listening to... "How're you holding up?"
"I'm great. I managed to get the power, and now I'm just watching the city."
"Where are you?"
"The outskirts. North, probably, as the sun is to my left." I explained. "The sun rises in the east, so yeah." I nodded to myself. "How far away are you, Alex? Why are you taking so long?" There was no reply, so I stood. "Alex?" I heard noise behind me, instantly turning around. There stood the two of them, Alex kneeling in front of Chris. His hands were bound and his mouth covered. His eyes conveyed a feeling I couldn't work out. It was like he was asking for forgiveness...so he was sorry? Why? What did he do? Chris sighed, looking at me.
"Come now, Ross. Let's go back home." He held his hand out for me. Alex's protests were muffled, and Chris hit him hard around the back of the head. Alex winced, his consciousness fading, but he still held on. I clenched my robot hand into a fist.
"Let him go, Chris. He's got nothing to do with it."
"Oh? Isn't he the one who guided you? The one who didn't try to bring you back? The one who is destroying your human side, and telling you to be more machine?" He pointed out. I looked at the hurt man, who just kept his gaze with mine. His eyes were dull, tired. He must have given all his energy to try help me. Maybe I was wrong to doubt him. "Now, stop playing this game. It's time you just leave this all behind you." Chris' words distracted me from my thoughts. "Come on, Ross! Let's just go back!" He almost sounded pleading. Especially using his name...my name... I looked at my hands; one robotic the other human. Which did I want? The life of a human, with emotions and feelings, or the life of a robot, with calculations and questions? I...I didn't know. But, there was one thing I did know...whichever I chose...I didn't want to be with Chris.
"No." I shook my head. "If I am human...let me be my own person. Not some fantasy you created. Your friend, Ross, is dead. Leave it behind." I replied. The words stung, I saw him flinch. He then knelt down beside Alex, a knife being taken from his pocket. "...Coward." I muttered. Chris just laughed.
"Well, this isn't just to sway you. I've wanted to HURT Alex for a long time..." He whispered, causing Alex to tense up. "He teased me for too long...even when he 'loved' me." I didn't think. I just reacted. The knife was quickly out of his hand, far away from the insane man. I pulled Alex away from him, cutting the binding around his wrists. He ripped the gag from his mouth, glaring at Chris. I knew he was angry; the various signs showed it was obvious. "Huh...you're a bad boy, Ross." Chris murmured, sitting on the ground. Alex kicked him in the face, watching him fall unconscious.
"Bastard..." He muttered before he turned to me. "Thanks." He nodded. I just turned away, glancing at the sun. "...What're you thinking?" Alex asked. I peered over my shoulder at him.
"...I don't know. Should I have gone with him? Become this...Ross?" I asked quietly. "Did I choose the right path? Becoming...this?" Again I looked at my hands. Neither looked like they belonged. I didn't want to be human or robot. But...maybe both could work. I felt Alex's hand on my shoulder, and I looked at him again.
"If you had gone with him, you would have been living a lie. Now, you get to choose how you live – whether it is a human life, a robot life, or...both." He replied. I smiled; something never understood why people did before, but now I did. "You know, I'll be here for you if you need someone, alright?" He added. I rolled my eyes, smirking playfully.
"Oh, just so the psycho man there can follow me again?" I asked. Alex nudged me gently, and we both laughed. I then walked over to Chris. "...He meant well, didn't he?" I glanced at Alex, who nodded. "He was just...too focused, I guess. He wanted it too much. Ross...what was he like?" Alex sighed, sitting down beside Chris.
"He..." He paused, another sigh coming from his lips. "Well...it's a bit hard to explain, I guess. You can't just...explain a person, I suppose." He chuckled, running his hand through Chris' hair to move it out of his eyes. "He was our friend. I..." Alex glanced up at me, and I could tell he was holding back tears. "Sometimes I wished he didn't die, either. But...we don't have the power to bring people back. We shouldn't." He then picked Chris up at he stood. "If you want to know, I'll compile all the memories Chris had in store for you and I'll give them to you." I nodded.
"That sounds fair. How will you get them to me without Chris knowing?" The smirk on Alex's face looked familiar. The first memory I had...
"I have my ways."
"Then this is goodbye?" The laugh from the man was unexpected, but welcomed.
"Only if I want it to be. Remember, I got to mess around with you the same amount as Chris." He winked. "So, I can contact you WHENEVER I want." I smiled – a true smile. In any other situation I would be concerned, now I was kind of relieved.
"...Until we meet again, then, Alex."
A/N: Longest oneshot I've written so far. 4,327 words (excluding this note). I had this inspiration and had written most of it before the whole Hearthstone thing, but it was quite funny how he turned out to be a kind of robot in that xD But I enjoyed this. Again, another Smith/Trott pairing. I guess slight Smith/Ross? But only slightly. And little Kim cameo in there! Dunno why I chose Kim of all of them, but whatever. This was fun. If I can get another inspiration for a oneshot, then I'll try write it. Maybe more Hat Films exclusive ones too, if this is liked enough (to be honest that doesn't matter. If I feel like writing about Hat Films, I'll write about Hat Films xD) But maybe some other Yogscast members in oneshots? It's possible!