Disclaimer: Okay I don't own the Nazgul or Sauron or whoever else is in
this fic. WARNING: I CANNOT BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR MENTALLY SCARRING
CHARACTERS AND/OR READERS!
KALASIN SUMMERBREEZE
********
'Dude, that was tense", said Nazgul #1.
"Like, did you, like, see all that water?", asked Nazgul #8
"Yeah, dude what was that for?", asked Nazgul #4. "I mean, all we want to do is get the ring to take over the world, ya know?"
"I know! They're just WAY too uptight.", put in Nazgul #3.
"AHHHHHH!!!", screeched Nazgul #2.
The other Nazgul put their hands over their ears, to block the screechy noise.
"Dude, what was up with that?", gawked Brad. "Wait. BRAD? Where the hell did that come from?"
They look at each other and realize that they all have preppy names. Nazgul #1 is Devin, 2 is Luke, 3 is Ray, 4 is Pete, 5 is Brad, 6 is Steve, 7 is JJ, 8 is Tommy and 9 is Kevin.
"Oh My God. These names SO do not go with our gothy style."We need to go talk to Sauron NOW."
"Wait, dudes, i was trying to tell you before, the damn elves broke our horsies.", said Luke.
"Broke? Horsies??", asked Kevin. All the other Nazgul ignored him.
"Well, what are we going to do now?", asked Steve.
"I guess we have to walk.", said Tommy.
"Walk??", asked JJ. "Have you completely LOST it? We can't WALK. It'll ruin our new peticures."
All the other Nazgul nodded their heads in agreement.
"Dudes, have you totally lost it? Did some of that water seep into your heads? We can do our little magicial apparation thing to get their.", said Luke.
"Oh, yeah.", said Tommy.
"Oh, yeah.", said J.J.
"Oh, Yeah", said Steve.
"Oh, Yeah.", said Ray.
"Oh, Yeah", said Devin.
"Oh, yeah.", said Brad.
"Oh, yeah", said Pete.
The Nazgul do their little apperation thing and they wind up in the Dark Tower.
"Dude, Sauron, the damn elves killed our horses.',said Devin.
"Wait, how did that happen?", Sauron asked.
"Okay well first that damn she-elf led us to the river.", started Tommy.
J.J. continued, "And she pulls out this sword and goes 'If you want him, come and claim him", so of course we have to do that."
'And as soon as the horses set foot into the river, all this water comes, like a bat outta hell! And the horses got killed!", finished Luke.
Devin sniffled. "Poor Blackie."
Sauron looked at each of his Ringwraiths, and burst out laughing.
"Dude, that ain't funny, man.", protested Steve, but Sauron kept on laughing.
They stood like that for about 10 minutes, with Sauron laughing his head off, and each of them wanted to knock his block off. Of course, with him being The Dark Lord, they just couldn't do that.
Once Sauron finally stopped laughing, Ray spoke up. "Dude, that just ain't funny man. You're so damn mean, we;re outta here."
Damn, cursed Sauron under his breath, I need them here to do my dirty work. "Wait, if you stay, I'll give you Flying Steeds."
The Nazgul stopped in their tracks. "Flying Steeds? Dude, that's wicked cool!", said Brad.
"So you're with me?', asked Sauron, an evil smile appearing on his lips.
"Hell yeah! Flying steeds, dude!', yelled Pete.
"Good. They're outside.", Sauon laughed as the Nazgul ran out to see their "flying steeds".
**********
The Nazgul stood there, arms hanging at their sides, clearly disappointed.
"Dude, that's just not cool.", said Pete. The other Ringwraiths nodded their heads in agreement. Tied to the fence post were nine pigeons.
"Well, I guess we have to make the most of it.", said Devin. He tried to sit on a pigeon, but only suceeded in squishing the poor thing to death.
'Dude, now we only have 8!", protested Ray. It took a while, but each of the Nazgul got on a igeon(J.J and Tommy shared, since they obviously have a "thing" for each other.) Once they were all situated they rode to the West.
*****
Sauron sat on his throne, and he could clearly hear in the distance an obnoxious shout of: "Oh, yeah. We'll REALLY strike fear into the hearts of our enemies flying on PIGEONS!"
******
And that is why the Pigeons-um I mean- Flying Steeds aren't in the movie!
KALASIN SUMMERBREEZE
********
'Dude, that was tense", said Nazgul #1.
"Like, did you, like, see all that water?", asked Nazgul #8
"Yeah, dude what was that for?", asked Nazgul #4. "I mean, all we want to do is get the ring to take over the world, ya know?"
"I know! They're just WAY too uptight.", put in Nazgul #3.
"AHHHHHH!!!", screeched Nazgul #2.
The other Nazgul put their hands over their ears, to block the screechy noise.
"Dude, what was up with that?", gawked Brad. "Wait. BRAD? Where the hell did that come from?"
They look at each other and realize that they all have preppy names. Nazgul #1 is Devin, 2 is Luke, 3 is Ray, 4 is Pete, 5 is Brad, 6 is Steve, 7 is JJ, 8 is Tommy and 9 is Kevin.
"Oh My God. These names SO do not go with our gothy style."We need to go talk to Sauron NOW."
"Wait, dudes, i was trying to tell you before, the damn elves broke our horsies.", said Luke.
"Broke? Horsies??", asked Kevin. All the other Nazgul ignored him.
"Well, what are we going to do now?", asked Steve.
"I guess we have to walk.", said Tommy.
"Walk??", asked JJ. "Have you completely LOST it? We can't WALK. It'll ruin our new peticures."
All the other Nazgul nodded their heads in agreement.
"Dudes, have you totally lost it? Did some of that water seep into your heads? We can do our little magicial apparation thing to get their.", said Luke.
"Oh, yeah.", said Tommy.
"Oh, yeah.", said J.J.
"Oh, Yeah", said Steve.
"Oh, Yeah.", said Ray.
"Oh, Yeah", said Devin.
"Oh, yeah.", said Brad.
"Oh, yeah", said Pete.
The Nazgul do their little apperation thing and they wind up in the Dark Tower.
"Dude, Sauron, the damn elves killed our horses.',said Devin.
"Wait, how did that happen?", Sauron asked.
"Okay well first that damn she-elf led us to the river.", started Tommy.
J.J. continued, "And she pulls out this sword and goes 'If you want him, come and claim him", so of course we have to do that."
'And as soon as the horses set foot into the river, all this water comes, like a bat outta hell! And the horses got killed!", finished Luke.
Devin sniffled. "Poor Blackie."
Sauron looked at each of his Ringwraiths, and burst out laughing.
"Dude, that ain't funny, man.", protested Steve, but Sauron kept on laughing.
They stood like that for about 10 minutes, with Sauron laughing his head off, and each of them wanted to knock his block off. Of course, with him being The Dark Lord, they just couldn't do that.
Once Sauron finally stopped laughing, Ray spoke up. "Dude, that just ain't funny man. You're so damn mean, we;re outta here."
Damn, cursed Sauron under his breath, I need them here to do my dirty work. "Wait, if you stay, I'll give you Flying Steeds."
The Nazgul stopped in their tracks. "Flying Steeds? Dude, that's wicked cool!", said Brad.
"So you're with me?', asked Sauron, an evil smile appearing on his lips.
"Hell yeah! Flying steeds, dude!', yelled Pete.
"Good. They're outside.", Sauon laughed as the Nazgul ran out to see their "flying steeds".
**********
The Nazgul stood there, arms hanging at their sides, clearly disappointed.
"Dude, that's just not cool.", said Pete. The other Ringwraiths nodded their heads in agreement. Tied to the fence post were nine pigeons.
"Well, I guess we have to make the most of it.", said Devin. He tried to sit on a pigeon, but only suceeded in squishing the poor thing to death.
'Dude, now we only have 8!", protested Ray. It took a while, but each of the Nazgul got on a igeon(J.J and Tommy shared, since they obviously have a "thing" for each other.) Once they were all situated they rode to the West.
*****
Sauron sat on his throne, and he could clearly hear in the distance an obnoxious shout of: "Oh, yeah. We'll REALLY strike fear into the hearts of our enemies flying on PIGEONS!"
******
And that is why the Pigeons-um I mean- Flying Steeds aren't in the movie!