Luna entered the Great Hall for breakfast in a cheery mood. She sat down at the Gryffindor table beside Harry. He didn't even look up from his plate of fruit when she slid in next to him, brushing his arm with hers. He seemed to be in a daze of some sort.

"Hi Harry!" Luna said in a dreamy tone.

He finally looked up and noticed that her uniform was not as orderly as it usually was. The top four buttons of her shirt were undone, her tie was missing, and when he looked down he saw that her skirt didn't even reach her knee as it should. She happily waited while he took in her sexy appearance.

"See something you like Harry?" She asked in a flirtatious voice.

A few seats down the table Parvati sighed. "Don't waste your time Luna." She stated in a sad tone.

"What do you mean?" Luna was confused she thought she looked good.

"Don't waste your time trying to get Harry attracted to you. The best of us have tried and failed...it just wont work." Parvati said in a bitter tone, emphasizing her last four words with stab with her fork into her own fruit.

Luna turned to Harry who had returned to his daze. She gently shook his arm to get his attention. "Harry how do I look?"

"Fine." He mumbled.

"Are there bimberdinks infesting your brain making you not be able to recognize beauty or is it worse? Are there Helopes making you highly paranoid consequently causing you to distance yourself from other people in fear?"

"What?" Parvati and Harry chorused.

"Luna you obviously don't know but...Harry's gay." Neither of the girls noticed Harry tense up.

"No he's not."

"Luna" Parvati started patiently, "denial is always the first step...I've been there, i didn't want to believe it either but that's the way the cookie crumbles. The good ones are always either taken or gay."

Parvati picked up a couple of napkins from the middle of the table thinking the younger girl was going to start crying. She placed them on the table in front of Luna. Luna did the opposite in fact, she started laughing. Luna ended up laughing so hard that tears actually did fall from her eyes. It took awhile for her to calm down but after a few minutes she did. She must be laughing to keep from crying, Parvati thought.

"I think you're mistaken." Luna said.

"No really..."

"Listen, there's no way a gay man could have given me all the orgasms Harry did last night." Silence reigned at the table following her bold statement. Harry and Parvati, along with the rest of the table, stared at her in shock.

"Excuse me?"

"And Harry seemed to enjoy it too much to be be gay...unless I am wrong about only girls being able to successfully fake orgasms. In which case I'm wrong but then again, after the first three times I'm sure he would have gotten sick of faking it for my benefit. Also, he was the one to come after me...why would a gay man try to seduce an innocent 4th year?" She heard Harry snort. "No, I'm sure he's straight...i mean he did date you Parvati and he had a crush on Cho last year."

"You're serious? We all just assumed because Ron was his most important thing for the 2nd task that they were...you know and then he went with me to the Yule Ball but he didn't really seem to enjoy himself and he didn't really ask me to dance."

"He's straight."

"Luna you don't know what you've just done." Harry ran a hand through his hair.

"HEY! DID YOU GUYS HEAR? HARRY'S STRAIGHT AFTER ALL!" You could hear a pin drop and the Luna heard several guys swear.

"What did we miss?" Ron asked as he and Hermione sat down a the table next to Parvati after entering the Great Hall late.

That question set off the voices of everyone in the hall and suddenly Harry had half the female population running toward him. Hoping to avoid the horde of fangirls Harry got up and ran out of the Great Hall but before not he yelled, "I hate you, Luna."