Disclaimer: I own nothing in this story unfortunately

A.N Ok so this is just a quick little one shot that came to me. Let's call it a little hayffie brain wave. I quite liked writing this story because I haven't really done anything like this before but it's a bit strange because I don't like doing this to my babies. Anyway I hope you enjoy

I wake up with the sweat dripping off my forehead. My dreams always end up tying back to that one woman, the woman that made my life hell for ten years. I say hell but it must of meant something because when she died it was like someone ripped me apart.

Effie Trinket. That god damn woman! Nagging me when she was alive about alcohol and manners but when she isn't here, I kind of miss it. I miss her. I keep expecting to get woken up by her high pitched voice telling me it's going to be a 'big, big day!' I never do get woken by it.

It's always the same dream or should I say flashback. Plutarch and I were running through the place where Effie was imprisoned. I knew the peacekeepers were coming but I needed to get Effie. Plutarch kept telling me it was time to go but I could recognise that voice from anywhere, shouting my name.

I started running in the direction of her voice, well aware my time was limited. The voice was getting closer and closer and I knew she was round about this area. When I got there, to her cell it wasn't my Effie. This one didn't have that sparkle of life in her eye, wasn't covered in that make-up or the wigs that made her look ridiculous but made her Effie. This one had stains on her arms, a horrible looking black eye, bruises and cuts everywhere and a burst lip. This was not my Effie. This was someone who had been through a rebellion.

When she saw me her eyes and face almost lit up and for a second I saw my usual Effie. She ran into my arms just as the gun shot right into her stomach. Her eyes went wide as the peacekeeper started running, Plutarch chasing him. Her eyes filled with tears and her legs gave way and I noticed she weighed nothing, she looked like she hadn't had a bite to eat in days.

"Sweetheart, come on princess, don't die on me, not here, not now," I pleaded feeling a lump in my throat.

"Haymitch, I can't, but before I go, I need to tell you one thing," she whispered tears streaming down her cheeks.

"What?"

"I..."

That was her last word. Her eyes widened as she gave her last exhale of breath.

I never got to find out what she wanted to tell me. I never will know but one thing I do know is that was the day I knew and my feelings for her were confirmed. I loved Effie Trinket. It took for her to die for me to properly open my eyes and realise it but I know it's true.

I still love her because even after four years of her not being in the world. I have never loved another woman. I know she would want me to move on but I can't. I crawl back into bed with a bottle of liquor trying to forget and I almost here her scolding me.

"You stupid drunk!"

I smile to myself and after two bottle of liquor I'm too numb to feel anything and I finally drift back into sleep.

Ok this was quite short but it's just a little one shot and I thought if I went any longer it would feel as if I was dragging it on. I'm sorry if there is any mistakes. Please review

~Wish2remain-nameless