THE HOLOGRAM ROSE

Doctor Who fandom
Ten x Rose
Rating: T
After Bad Wolf Bay, before they met again

He walked into the console room, thinking where to go now. The TARDIS was so quiet, too quiet since he lost Her. It's been some time, but he still couldn't get used to the absence of her laugh. He adjusted the course, raised his head and froze. How…? She was there. The girl he lost and didn't even said a proper goodbye (Or maybe he did? He didn't finish what he was about to say, but he doesn't like endings…). It wasn't possible, but there she was, standing there turned to him with her back. He didn't even realised when he started rushing towards her, but when he tried to close her in his arms, he met air. She wasn't really there. Just an image. A hologram? But still, it shouldn't have happened. However, it doesn't matter to him now, he will think rationally later. Blimey, Rose was there. His Rose! He didn't took his eyes from her even for a moment. She was so… human. Pink and yellow beautiful human. Suddenly she fully turned around, like she has sensed his presence.
- Rose..?- he asked, surprised by how husky his voice was. He stepped one step closer and realised that there were tears in her eyes. She sat down, right where she was standing and hide her face in her hands. She was crying just in front of him and he couldn't do anything. He wanted to took her hand, hug her, make her laugh again, just as he used to, but he couldn't touch her this time. Then Rose lifted her head and looked at him. Well, not exactly at him, she was looking somewhere above his left shoulder like she didn't see him. It was the closest he could get, apparently.
- Doctor…- she mouthed his name and his hearts grow warmer but also broke a bit more at the same time. See, that's the problem with love- you like how it hurts… He was sure that she didn't see him, but still hoping she could somehow hear him.
- Rose, I am here.- he said a bit louder, but nothing has happened, she was still sitting there, starring blankly into space. But what if…. No. But maybe? What if she wasn't there at all? Maybe his broken mind is playing with him again.
- Doctor…- she said again, but no voice came out. He couldn't touch her, he couldn't hear her. He could only watch her cry and that hurts as hell. – Doctor, I need you…- at that exact moment his hearts broke into milion pieces. Again. That was the first time he couldn't help her when she needed him and that was unbearable. He sat on the TRADIS floor next to the picture of Rose. He should go (let HER go) and let her vanish. But he couldn't even move his eyes of her face.

When he saw her few minutes ago, his mind was full of thoughts, shouting, crying and so much joy because of her sight, but now it was blank. One of his hearts wanted to stop, while the other one wants to beat frantically. – My Rose…- he wispered and felt a tear falling down his cheek. Rose moved and looked up like someone was calling her. Indeed, the low quality picture of Jackie appeared, Rose lifted herself to stand up and the hologram suddenly dissapeared. He wasn't expecting this and even that she wasn't there, he keep sitting on the floor for a while. All this just didn't make any sense- why, how, what for?

Next time she show up was two days after previous time. The Doctor was sitting in the TARDIS library and apparently so was Rose. She was reading a book, sitting on one leg, while the other one was hanging down the armchair armrest. She was barefoot, wearing something that probably was her pyjama- shorts and a T-shirt. She looked more peacefull now, focused on her book. Of course, he used to saw her like this during their travelling, but this time it felt a bit like peeping. She didn't know he was looking, although it was nothing inappropriate it was still… wrong.

At first he felt bad, like some kind of pervert, but then he stopped carying and started talking. And he talked a lot, whenever her image appeared, just as he used to. He rambled about time, space, planets and galaxies and for those short time he could feel a little bit better. But then she disappeared and it hurts again, just as much every time. It has become his habit, or more like his new addiction. He could waited for hours for her to show up (he was hiding it well, always doing something but ready to drop it at every second). There were no pattern of those strange „visits", they were at random time and places, so he started to check every room, every corner of the TARDIS. She was showing up at the different times of her day, during different actions, once or twice even when she was asleep.
And then it was that one time that fill his fantasies for days. He couldn't denny that Rose Tyler was really attractive, considering she was human. That time she showed up in her bathroom. At first he just stopped talking about his latest adventure watching her brush her teeth and remove the make-up. He was lost in his thoughts and didn't even realised when she has undressed to her underwear. Of course it wasn't first time when he saw a woman like this (however it might be first human…). But he was alone for so long and, well, she was rather attractive. Everything about her was beautiful, erotic and adorable now- the way she was undoing her bra (he probably should look away, doesn't he?) or how she throwed her clothes on the floor. Suddenly, with a corner of his eye he catched something shiny, something in her pocket, little metal machine that she seemed to be carrying everywhere with her and sometimes hold it like the biggest treasure she got. He could never really see what that was, but this time it fall out of her pocket and he could see the whole thing.

- Oh yes!- he slapped his forehead.- That's it! I gave it to her in 57 century, The Intelligent Hologram. But it was broken…oooooh right! It has recharged but still cannot contain voice transmissions or the image from the other side! But how will I make it work again from here…?
He tried to combine another hologram device, to send a signal, even to calibrate the TARDIS to get the better signal somehow, but it never worked, not until that one last time that it did. He didn't know what precisely he changed, but the whole console suddenly got really hot and the picture of Rose eating her cereal in front of TV dissapeared and it haven't showed again. The Doctor kicked the console in grief, which caused the small transmitter (which he added before) to fall into the hole between lever and buttons. He didn't realised that and wasn't looking for it later but the next day that one tiny red lamp started to flickered, like the REC buton while filming.

Well, maybe it was.