A/N: Please read and review, but please don't flame. This story is a very
personal one to me, because my friend was bulimic and anorexic, luckily she
got help thanks to me, but unfortunately thanks to me it took me a while to
tell. This story is why you should immediately tell and why bulimia and
anorexia don't pay off.
Tanya sighed as she woke up. Every morning she faced something that made her want to cry. As a doctor she many gruesome sights but that she could live with. As an agent she saw many disgusting ways of thinking that could sicken anyone. But that she also could live with. But there was one thing that always got her, and it happened every morning. Herself.
Looking in the mirror to see the ugly fat Tanya was something she always had to do every day of her life. Of course she wasn't fat or unattractive but she always was putting herself down. She had almost no self-esteem or any confidence in her appearance. It sure didn't help any sharing a room with someone who could easily pass for a supermodel. Having her do her hair and always buying new clothes. And than when Lucrecia De Coy came well that was it. Having her teammates bark like dogs over her like they had never seen a woman before when she was right there the entire time.
She wanted to like nice for herself. She wanted to be able to look in the mirror and love the person whom which she saw. She wanted to be able to like the person she saw on TV when they asked her interviews. That's what she wanted. But that wasn't it. She wanted to look nice for the guys too. She never got the eye of the cute goalie at school, or the center. She was never even considered! All she was, was some nerd that was going to make a million dollars doing something scientific. She never even pictured herself with a husband, she was just too ugly. And that was a problem for Tanya Vanderblock.
So she decided to do something about it. She was tired of being the fat one, or the ugly one. She was for once going to be the one that everyone adored and that all the guys wanted. The girl of their dreams, one of those flaky girls. For once she wanted to be able to walk up and down and have boys bark at her. She wanted to be the movie star face, and the gorgeous looking one. She wanted to have the beauty and grace. She wanted to be that Miss Puck World, (Miss America). So she was going to do something about it. Losing weight was something that fat people like herself did. She kept telling herself that that's what she needed. It was hard for her to say that she wasn't fat just a little big boned, and not ugly just always working hard so she couldn't keep up with her beauty. But it's also hard to admit this when you have a friend who does the exact same things you do and still looks awesome. So she was going to be slim and gorgeous too. After all boys did want blondes, did they not?
Tanya knew science better than anything else and she knew that if she lost weight everything else would fall into place. She gave herself some credit on her hair thick blonde hair. It was very pretty. She didn't style it to be pretty but she knew that it was. But her face, ugh! But if she lost weight she would lose a lot of pounds in her face. She'd look pretty! So Tanya decided that she was going on a diet.
That's how it started out anyway. She decided that skipping breakfast wouldn't kill, and even lunch wouldn't hurt either. Now Tanya knew very well that if you want to lose weight you should have breakfast, and that skipping lunch isn't the greatest idea. But for some reason she decided that all of her years in school were just wrong on this subject. She wanted immediate results. So dieting wouldn't kill her any.
She walked into the kitchen where she found Nosedive and Duke.
"Hey Tawny", said Nosedive wearily, "Want breakfast?"
"Already ate", she said quickly. It would be to embarrassing to tell the guys she was dieting.
"Oh", said Nosedive.
Tanya sat down, "What happened to him?"
"Who the kid", asked Duke.
"Yeah", replied Tanya.
"Got drunk last night", said Nosedive.
Tanya looked horrified, "Nosedive that's not-"
"I know I know okay", said Nosedive, "But."
He flagged a hundred dollar bill in the air, "I got money for it."
"Does WildWing know", asked Tanya.
"What are you kidding", said Duke, "You didn't hear all that screaming last night?"
"No I was out", replied Tanya, "Remember?"
"Why would he remember", thought Tanya, "He only cares if Mallory is out, everyone notices the lack of beauty in the room. To them you just clean things, and fix things. You don't mean anything except when you're patching them up. You have no emotional attachment to them. Well that's all going to change, and change very quickly."
"You were out", said Nosedive.
Of course this remark didn't help Tanya any.
"Yes", she said shortly, "Letric Land."
"Oh", said Duke, "Anyway WildWing's face got so red when he came in drunk."
"It was worth it", said Nosedive, "I got a hundred bucks!"
"Yeah you should of have seen him", said Duke, "Couldn't even walk straight! And to top it all off, you should have seen his clothes! He was dressed up as a girl-"
"Where did he get the clothes", asked Tanya.
"You're closet", said Nosedive quietly.
"What", exclaimed Tanya.
"Well I couldn't fit into Mallory's!"
And that was it. Tanya had had enough. She knew that she wasn't as slim as Mallory, and she also knew that she wasn't as pretty, but they didn't have to rub it in her face like that! She knew that Nosedive couldn't fit into Mallory's tight clothes but the fact that he knew that he could fit into her larger clothing was just mean and cruel. And than to parade in her clothes to show the entire world that they fit him was just plain evil! Showing off her body size in front of everyone like that.
"Good bye Nosedive", said Tanya standing up ready to leave.
"No wait Tawny", said Duke, "You didn't hear the rest of it! Than Mr. Big shot over here came in and pretended that he was Canard's hooker. You should have seen Canard's face, well before he tried to kill him. Luckily for Nosedive over here Grin was there able to hold him back." "Too bad he didn't hold Wing back", said Nosedive, "That would have worked better for me!"
"Man there was so much screaming I had the biggest head ache ever", said Duke, "Man you're brother can scream!"
Tanya zoned out and thought. She knew that if WildWing found out she was dieting he'd probably make a big to do if he was taking the role of Nosedive's parent. She would have to be extra careful not to get caught and her lies would have to follow. She couldn't get caught or not be able to explain herself. It'd be too humiliating.
And than again she didn't even know if WildWing would care. If you're not pretty than maybe they'd take no attention to you. But than again she told herself she was making a big deal out of nothing. She was just after all dieting, nothing serious!
Well that's what she thought too before her perfect world collapsed into hell.
"Tanya you listening", said Duke, "Come on there's more."
"There's more", asked Tanya?
"Yeah", said Nosedive, "WildWing started jumping up and down so hard that he broke a lamp."
"And you two are laughing because", asked Tanya.
"Because it was so funny", said Nosedive laughing hysterically.
"Query, who proposed the bet", asked Tanya.
"Well I didn't think he would do it", said Duke.
"Of course not", replied Tanya, "Well I have to go."
"Where", asked Nosedive. "Letric Land", said Tanya.
"Why I thought you were already there last night", said Nosedive.
"I um, uh, I'm meeting a friend there."
"Oh", said both boys, "Bye!"
Tanya smirked as she left. She headed toward the work out room. Luckily for her no one was there. She locked the doors and than commed WildWing.
"Wing hey", she said.
"Hey there Tanya", he replied.
"You okay", she asked, "You look like Nosedive."
"Don't even say that name!"
"Sorry. Anyway no one can work out today there's some sort of fungus growing in here, I'll be in here all day okay?"
"EW! Sure okay. Thanks, need any help?"
"NO! I mean no that's all right. Thanks for the offer, bye!"
"Bye."
Tanya smiled she could work out all day, and no one would suspect a thing. It was the perfect plan. She started going on all of the machines getting in as much exercise as possible. She wasn't going to be ugly anymore! She kept going and going, not even caring to stop or drink any water even though she knew better. She just kept going and going. She had no intentions of stopping. She knew that if she wanted that body or those looks than she knew what she had to do. There was a knock on the door.
"Who is it", she asked nervously.
"Me Wing", said WildWing, "Can you let me in, I got your dinner. I'll eat with you. Can I come in?"
"No", cried Tanya.
If he came in than he would see a certain lack of tools. Fortunately she worked like always calm under pressure. She relaxed her voice and quickly came up with a story.
"Sorry WildWing", she said, "You can't come in. I've got all these sprays up and I don't have time to make a suit for you."
"Oh", said WildWing, "Well you want to come out here and eat? I'll stay with you."
"Sorry but I really want to finish this."
"Oh okay", said WildWing sadly, "Well I'll leave your dinner outside than. Bye."
WildWing left sadly and headed straight for his brother's room.
"Why can't he love me", thought Tanya, "I'd love to go on a date with him. Well in good time you'll be perfect enough and than you'll have your selection of guys!"
~Nosedive's Room~
WildWing pounced on his brother and wrestled with him to successfully put a pin on him.
"I didn't do it", screamed Nosedive, "Whatever it was, I didn't do it!"
"Calm down", said WildWing, "I'm not going to pound you! And what didn't you do?"
"Sorry reflex. So care to tell me why you're on top of me?"
"Well I thought about your relationship with Canard and I wanted some of the action too."
"I said I won't do it again, okay? Geez you really know to make someone feel even worse!"
"I'm sorry."
Nosedive studied his brother, "Hey what's wrong?"
"You wouldn't understand."
"Why because you're cutting off the circulation? That's a good reason, but try me anyway."
"Oh sorry", said WildWing.
He got off his brother and laid down on the floor.
"Why won't Tanya go out with me?"
"Come again?"
"I always could get a girl on Puck World, why can't I now?"
"You have a thing for Tawny?"
"Yes."
"Hehe."
WildWing took a pillow and swung at his brother, "Stop that. Why won't she go out with me?"
"Wing", said Nosedive, "Did you plain out ask her? Or did you do that annoying hinting thing again?"
WildWing blushed.
"Aha, I knew it. You are too shy, get some courage and ask her out. You know the right way."
WildWing rolled his eyes, "All right, all right. But just give me some time."
"It's your life."
If only Tanya could have seen the beauty from within. The way she had already won WildWing's heart with her personality. But please don't get me wrong, she didn't just want this fantastic dream body for WildWing but for herself and her confidence. But for her, character meant nothing and her body needed serious improvement. If only she had seen that she wasn't as ugly as she perceived and wasn't fat at all. But for some reason girls can't do that. They have to find the negative and than keep tormenting themselves over it when it's nothing to begin with. But if only she had seen what destruction laid ahead.
A/N: Sorry it's so short!! Please review though, I promise I'll make them longer, this story means a lot to me. And this is not going to be a romance fic. It'll have a little of it, but not much. Thanks for listening, and please review thanks!
Tanya sighed as she woke up. Every morning she faced something that made her want to cry. As a doctor she many gruesome sights but that she could live with. As an agent she saw many disgusting ways of thinking that could sicken anyone. But that she also could live with. But there was one thing that always got her, and it happened every morning. Herself.
Looking in the mirror to see the ugly fat Tanya was something she always had to do every day of her life. Of course she wasn't fat or unattractive but she always was putting herself down. She had almost no self-esteem or any confidence in her appearance. It sure didn't help any sharing a room with someone who could easily pass for a supermodel. Having her do her hair and always buying new clothes. And than when Lucrecia De Coy came well that was it. Having her teammates bark like dogs over her like they had never seen a woman before when she was right there the entire time.
She wanted to like nice for herself. She wanted to be able to look in the mirror and love the person whom which she saw. She wanted to be able to like the person she saw on TV when they asked her interviews. That's what she wanted. But that wasn't it. She wanted to look nice for the guys too. She never got the eye of the cute goalie at school, or the center. She was never even considered! All she was, was some nerd that was going to make a million dollars doing something scientific. She never even pictured herself with a husband, she was just too ugly. And that was a problem for Tanya Vanderblock.
So she decided to do something about it. She was tired of being the fat one, or the ugly one. She was for once going to be the one that everyone adored and that all the guys wanted. The girl of their dreams, one of those flaky girls. For once she wanted to be able to walk up and down and have boys bark at her. She wanted to be the movie star face, and the gorgeous looking one. She wanted to have the beauty and grace. She wanted to be that Miss Puck World, (Miss America). So she was going to do something about it. Losing weight was something that fat people like herself did. She kept telling herself that that's what she needed. It was hard for her to say that she wasn't fat just a little big boned, and not ugly just always working hard so she couldn't keep up with her beauty. But it's also hard to admit this when you have a friend who does the exact same things you do and still looks awesome. So she was going to be slim and gorgeous too. After all boys did want blondes, did they not?
Tanya knew science better than anything else and she knew that if she lost weight everything else would fall into place. She gave herself some credit on her hair thick blonde hair. It was very pretty. She didn't style it to be pretty but she knew that it was. But her face, ugh! But if she lost weight she would lose a lot of pounds in her face. She'd look pretty! So Tanya decided that she was going on a diet.
That's how it started out anyway. She decided that skipping breakfast wouldn't kill, and even lunch wouldn't hurt either. Now Tanya knew very well that if you want to lose weight you should have breakfast, and that skipping lunch isn't the greatest idea. But for some reason she decided that all of her years in school were just wrong on this subject. She wanted immediate results. So dieting wouldn't kill her any.
She walked into the kitchen where she found Nosedive and Duke.
"Hey Tawny", said Nosedive wearily, "Want breakfast?"
"Already ate", she said quickly. It would be to embarrassing to tell the guys she was dieting.
"Oh", said Nosedive.
Tanya sat down, "What happened to him?"
"Who the kid", asked Duke.
"Yeah", replied Tanya.
"Got drunk last night", said Nosedive.
Tanya looked horrified, "Nosedive that's not-"
"I know I know okay", said Nosedive, "But."
He flagged a hundred dollar bill in the air, "I got money for it."
"Does WildWing know", asked Tanya.
"What are you kidding", said Duke, "You didn't hear all that screaming last night?"
"No I was out", replied Tanya, "Remember?"
"Why would he remember", thought Tanya, "He only cares if Mallory is out, everyone notices the lack of beauty in the room. To them you just clean things, and fix things. You don't mean anything except when you're patching them up. You have no emotional attachment to them. Well that's all going to change, and change very quickly."
"You were out", said Nosedive.
Of course this remark didn't help Tanya any.
"Yes", she said shortly, "Letric Land."
"Oh", said Duke, "Anyway WildWing's face got so red when he came in drunk."
"It was worth it", said Nosedive, "I got a hundred bucks!"
"Yeah you should of have seen him", said Duke, "Couldn't even walk straight! And to top it all off, you should have seen his clothes! He was dressed up as a girl-"
"Where did he get the clothes", asked Tanya.
"You're closet", said Nosedive quietly.
"What", exclaimed Tanya.
"Well I couldn't fit into Mallory's!"
And that was it. Tanya had had enough. She knew that she wasn't as slim as Mallory, and she also knew that she wasn't as pretty, but they didn't have to rub it in her face like that! She knew that Nosedive couldn't fit into Mallory's tight clothes but the fact that he knew that he could fit into her larger clothing was just mean and cruel. And than to parade in her clothes to show the entire world that they fit him was just plain evil! Showing off her body size in front of everyone like that.
"Good bye Nosedive", said Tanya standing up ready to leave.
"No wait Tawny", said Duke, "You didn't hear the rest of it! Than Mr. Big shot over here came in and pretended that he was Canard's hooker. You should have seen Canard's face, well before he tried to kill him. Luckily for Nosedive over here Grin was there able to hold him back." "Too bad he didn't hold Wing back", said Nosedive, "That would have worked better for me!"
"Man there was so much screaming I had the biggest head ache ever", said Duke, "Man you're brother can scream!"
Tanya zoned out and thought. She knew that if WildWing found out she was dieting he'd probably make a big to do if he was taking the role of Nosedive's parent. She would have to be extra careful not to get caught and her lies would have to follow. She couldn't get caught or not be able to explain herself. It'd be too humiliating.
And than again she didn't even know if WildWing would care. If you're not pretty than maybe they'd take no attention to you. But than again she told herself she was making a big deal out of nothing. She was just after all dieting, nothing serious!
Well that's what she thought too before her perfect world collapsed into hell.
"Tanya you listening", said Duke, "Come on there's more."
"There's more", asked Tanya?
"Yeah", said Nosedive, "WildWing started jumping up and down so hard that he broke a lamp."
"And you two are laughing because", asked Tanya.
"Because it was so funny", said Nosedive laughing hysterically.
"Query, who proposed the bet", asked Tanya.
"Well I didn't think he would do it", said Duke.
"Of course not", replied Tanya, "Well I have to go."
"Where", asked Nosedive. "Letric Land", said Tanya.
"Why I thought you were already there last night", said Nosedive.
"I um, uh, I'm meeting a friend there."
"Oh", said both boys, "Bye!"
Tanya smirked as she left. She headed toward the work out room. Luckily for her no one was there. She locked the doors and than commed WildWing.
"Wing hey", she said.
"Hey there Tanya", he replied.
"You okay", she asked, "You look like Nosedive."
"Don't even say that name!"
"Sorry. Anyway no one can work out today there's some sort of fungus growing in here, I'll be in here all day okay?"
"EW! Sure okay. Thanks, need any help?"
"NO! I mean no that's all right. Thanks for the offer, bye!"
"Bye."
Tanya smiled she could work out all day, and no one would suspect a thing. It was the perfect plan. She started going on all of the machines getting in as much exercise as possible. She wasn't going to be ugly anymore! She kept going and going, not even caring to stop or drink any water even though she knew better. She just kept going and going. She had no intentions of stopping. She knew that if she wanted that body or those looks than she knew what she had to do. There was a knock on the door.
"Who is it", she asked nervously.
"Me Wing", said WildWing, "Can you let me in, I got your dinner. I'll eat with you. Can I come in?"
"No", cried Tanya.
If he came in than he would see a certain lack of tools. Fortunately she worked like always calm under pressure. She relaxed her voice and quickly came up with a story.
"Sorry WildWing", she said, "You can't come in. I've got all these sprays up and I don't have time to make a suit for you."
"Oh", said WildWing, "Well you want to come out here and eat? I'll stay with you."
"Sorry but I really want to finish this."
"Oh okay", said WildWing sadly, "Well I'll leave your dinner outside than. Bye."
WildWing left sadly and headed straight for his brother's room.
"Why can't he love me", thought Tanya, "I'd love to go on a date with him. Well in good time you'll be perfect enough and than you'll have your selection of guys!"
~Nosedive's Room~
WildWing pounced on his brother and wrestled with him to successfully put a pin on him.
"I didn't do it", screamed Nosedive, "Whatever it was, I didn't do it!"
"Calm down", said WildWing, "I'm not going to pound you! And what didn't you do?"
"Sorry reflex. So care to tell me why you're on top of me?"
"Well I thought about your relationship with Canard and I wanted some of the action too."
"I said I won't do it again, okay? Geez you really know to make someone feel even worse!"
"I'm sorry."
Nosedive studied his brother, "Hey what's wrong?"
"You wouldn't understand."
"Why because you're cutting off the circulation? That's a good reason, but try me anyway."
"Oh sorry", said WildWing.
He got off his brother and laid down on the floor.
"Why won't Tanya go out with me?"
"Come again?"
"I always could get a girl on Puck World, why can't I now?"
"You have a thing for Tawny?"
"Yes."
"Hehe."
WildWing took a pillow and swung at his brother, "Stop that. Why won't she go out with me?"
"Wing", said Nosedive, "Did you plain out ask her? Or did you do that annoying hinting thing again?"
WildWing blushed.
"Aha, I knew it. You are too shy, get some courage and ask her out. You know the right way."
WildWing rolled his eyes, "All right, all right. But just give me some time."
"It's your life."
If only Tanya could have seen the beauty from within. The way she had already won WildWing's heart with her personality. But please don't get me wrong, she didn't just want this fantastic dream body for WildWing but for herself and her confidence. But for her, character meant nothing and her body needed serious improvement. If only she had seen that she wasn't as ugly as she perceived and wasn't fat at all. But for some reason girls can't do that. They have to find the negative and than keep tormenting themselves over it when it's nothing to begin with. But if only she had seen what destruction laid ahead.
A/N: Sorry it's so short!! Please review though, I promise I'll make them longer, this story means a lot to me. And this is not going to be a romance fic. It'll have a little of it, but not much. Thanks for listening, and please review thanks!