This is the first half of a character study of Elphaba- internal dialogue. I'm not sure how well I've done with her... she's a hard character to get a sense of. Written with a Glinda/Elphaba theme in mind, though it can be seen in many different ways.
-I-
Galinda always sleeps on her stomach, her head turned sideways and arms curled around her. Only her legs move. Sometimes they lay flat, one beside another. Sometimes one is curled around the other. Sometimes they are bent towards her back in a way I cannot see as comfortable. No matter her leg position, or anything for that matter, Galinda always manages to look attractive. How she achieves it I shall never guess, nor will I ask her for I'm sure she'd put on airs and refuse to admit she knows anything about it.
I'm no stranger to beauty, but Nessa had her unattractive moments. Even after Galinda has disturbed or demolished every nerve I have, I can still find little fault with her face, her tiny little body, her glossy, golden curls. This somehow disturbs me. So does the fact that I cannot seem to keep from looking at her. Over my books, around corners, and while she sleeps. Always while she sleeps.
And her clothes! I'm both amused and jealous of the sheer frivolity of it all. Lace, frills, pastels, buttons, hoops, skirts; how can a person so small wear so much and not look in the least weighed down? Everything is so outrageously girly, and yet she pulls it off so well. Somewhere in the back of my mind I wish I could wear clothes like that, even after seeing the length of time it takes to get dressed in the morning. I honestly don't know how she can get to class in time and still look the way she does.
Perhaps Miss Galinda's appearance fascinates me so because it is everything I am not (petite, pretty, blond, and girly) and I am fascinated by anything that is so unlike myself. Perhaps it is so, and that is what I tell myself when I catch myself falling back a few steps just to watch her walk, when I find myself touching one of her gowns instead of reaching for my own dress. But at night when she's asleep and I can watch her without fear of her seeing what I'm doing, I know it's a lie.