Chapter 1: Of Breakfasts and Bites
My how a year can go by within a blink of an eye. Megamind, still the defender of the bustling city of Metro City, wondered where it had all gone. Not a year ago he had been sitting in prison in his rather glaringly painted cell eagerly awaiting his moment to escape and to be reunited with Minion. It was really all part of his routine, to wreak havoc upon the unsuspecting citizens of the city he had once loathed so much, resulting in witty banter back and forth with his life time rival Metro Man only to end up in the same place again.
Not to mention how he got to kidnap Roxanne Ritchi a few times in the process. That was one of the few things he had looked forward to, outside of the whole being a criminal genius and master of all villainy. I mean, what was the point in being a bad guy unless you kidnapped somebody every now and again? Nobody else would do, though. It had to be the sassy reporter. Always. Why, you may ask? Well why not? She was the closest person to Metro Man, as well as his supposed love interest (not that Megamind subscribed to gossip magazines or anything like that). Clearly nobody else could be a better kidnapee than Roxanne Ritchi, for even if there was an opening for it and he had to read over a million resumes from weird people who wanted to be kidnapped by him (and who wouldn't?) he would always end up picking Roxanne every single time.
Yet now he was wearing the boots in the hero business. And no matter how devilishly good looking he was whilst wearing them, he still couldn't help but wonder how he could have been stuck in such a rut and never noticed how there could be so much more to life. Tot be stuck loosing every single day, to end up being thrown into jail only in order to break out again either by himself (a rarity but don't go telling anyone else that) or wait for Minion to sneak him out. If there was one thing he could rely on, outside of always loosing was Minion. He would no doubt had spent far more time stuck in that prison if it wasn't for his pet, best friend, side kick and underling Minion.
Since the drastic turn around in his life, now his days always started in his warm cozy bed (still in the style of a prison bed, bolted to the wall for some things could never change), in his not-quite-as-evil-lair without worrying about ending up back in prison again. Now the lair was properly looked after day in, day out. He had even begun helping Minion around with some of the chores, but that was only if he wasn't busy out doing hero goody two shoes things. Though he got the feeling now and then that Minion preferred to do his chores alone, without any help.
It would be a great lie if he believed that absolutely everyone in the city had forgiven him for his past evil doings. There were certainly those who spoke out against him, pointing out just how many times he had attacked the city. Most times they were silenced by the other side of the argument which seemed to take great joy in pointing out just how bad he had been at being bad, and that Metro Man had always stepped in before things could escalate. They of course, never had, until the superheros' "death". That was still a very large sore spot for some, and despite he and Roxanne's coaxing the man formally known as Metro Man and now known as Wayne 'Music Man' Scott still refused to reveal himself to be still alive.
Slowly he sat up in his bed, wiping the sleep from his eyes before swinging his skinny legs over the bed and sliding them into the black bat slippers, wriggling his toes as he did. Walking over to his newly installed window, Megamind pulled the curtains open and stared out at the city that had once booed his name. The reconstruction of the buildings destroyed by Tighten was long since done, and Metro Tower once again stood proudly in the center of the city. No more were there graffiti tags of 'M' littered around, and things had returned to normal months back. The city almost looked peaceful, and this brought and odd... glowly feeling to the pit of Megaminds' stomach. He figured it was gas.
Then the smell of coffee with a mixture of toast, eggs and bacon drifted to his nose and he grinned like a little boy on Christmas Day (a holiday he could now properly enjoy) and hurried down the stairs to find Minion at their 'kitchen' area. Seeing how the lair was really just a large, empty warehouse certain sections were dedicated to particular areas. The kitchen was towards the back, away from the plotting and living areas, where a stove, table, fridge, and microwave sat on various tables of varying height. Some of the tables had been looted during their 'crazy days' and they just hadn't bothered to take them back since nobody asked them to return them.
There was Minion, in his 'Kiss the Cook' apron and humming a song that was most probably Crazy Train. Oh how that fish loved Ozzy Osborne music. The humming stopped though, once Minion heard the familiar footfalls of the alien. "Goooood morning Sir!" he greeted, turning in his dome bowl to grin toothily at the blue skinned alien. "How did you sleep?"
"With my eyes shut, Minion." Megamind replied as he grabbed the chair to their table and pulled it out and sat on it. "So the usual."
"Very witty Sir." the fish replied with a roll of his eyes before sliding the bacon onto a plate which already had eggs and toast ready and waiting. Picking it up he made his way over to the table and set it down before his friend. "It's your favorite sir, eggs and bacon ala Megamind."
The toast had been arranged in such a way it was mimicking the scope and size of Megaminds' own impressive cranium, the eggs were his eyes and the bacon had been placed where his eyebrows, mouth, and goatee were. This caused Megamind to bite his bottom lip in absolute glee; it was a rare thing for Minion to make him THIS kind of breakfast. Usually it was reserved for his birthday (December 17, put it in your calendars!), New Years, and any day that AC/DC brought out a new album. That last one didn't happen too often, sadly.
"What's the special occasion, Minion?" he asked as he stabbed at the eggs with his fork, making the yolk bleed out onto the toast and make it soggy. He did it in a fairly serial killer way, in fact no doubt Norman Bates would be proud of such a murderous way to break ones eggs at breakfast time. Really now, what else could you expect from a guy who grew up in prison amongst hardened criminals who had been in there for years?
"Oh how your memory fails you sir," Minion said as he opened up his can of fish food and lifted it to the top of his dome where he opened the small hatch and began to sprinkle his own breakfast in. "It's been a year to the day since you defeated your own creation and won over the hearts and minds of the city!"
"Mmffphhf?" Megamind asked, his mouth already full of soggy toast, dripping egg, and crunchy bacon. Had it really been a year? Funny how he had just been pondering about it in his bed. Sadly his attempt at talking had pushed some un-chewed toast into the back of his throat and he began couching up a storm, his skin turning a darker side of blue before Minion reached over and gave him a firm robotic arm smack which dislodged the food. Once this nastiness was done with he took a great big gulp of orange juice, not wanting to scald his throat with hot coffee.
Minion simply nibbled away at the top of his dome bowl, feeding on the fish flakes. "Remember to chew before speaking Sir."
"Yes yes." After the unpleasantness, Megamind spoke again. "It's been a year, really?" he asked, casting his green eyes to look at some of the Brain Bots who were hovering near by. No doubt hopeful that daddy would toss them a piece of bacon or toast and if not, they would certainly try to steal a piece once his head was turned. This was a very sneaky art, which they had mastered after many days of watching daddy eating good things off of his plate and despite the fact they couldn't really eat, they still wanted something new to chew on.
"Yes Sir, a full year. It really is amazing how time flies." the fish replied after swallowing his breakfast and getting to his feet, and making his way over to the sink in order to begin washing up the frying pan and such. "No doubt you have something amazing planned for yourself and Ms. Ritchi in order of this momentous occasion?"
Lucky for Minion he had his back to the genius or he would have seen the completely lost look on his face. Crap! A year! How could he have forgotten such a monumentous event? Was it in his day planner? He would have to check that later. No doubt it would be, but then again he had forgotten. Could he chalk this up to morning fuzziness? Quite possibly. Whilst his mind was on the subject of fuzz he ran a finger along his thin black goatee in thought, and somehow didn't spot one of the Brain Bots stealing a piece of bacon off his fork.
"Oh yes, of course. Yes. Why wouldn't I? I mean, pfft. Only a complete moron would forget it's his one-year anniversary for not only saving the city but getting the girl. Duh, Minion." Megamind replied with a snort of disbelief before going to bite his bacon, only to find it missing.
"Wonderful, sir!" Minion played the game flawlessly, knowing all to well that Megamind forgot. "I'm glad to hear that." the fish turned to peer at his boss in a way that resembled a person glancing over their shoulder. Quite a feat for a fish in a dome atop a robotic gorilla body that he controlled with his thoughts. For all the badly made creations that Megamind had made over the years, this gorilla suit was one of his greatest inventions. Course, it hadn't always been a gorilla. In the beginning he had been in something that reminded him of a dog, but that had hindered his ability to help his master at all. The second was with a lot more weaponry and after almost shooting Megamind with the guns in his butt (what had he been thinking?) they decided to make yet another suit. Both seemed fairly content with the gorilla suit, at least so far.
In the background, the Brain Bots were gathering around the one with the bacon and they began fighting over the tiny scrap of meat. Somehow this went unnoticed by either Minion or Megamind.
"So what is it do you have planned, exactly?" the fish asked, quite unable to hide the grin on his face. It wasn't that he was a bad minion per say, he just enjoyed seeing Megamind think on his feet and see where it led to.
"Well uh, to start off... well. Hrm."
"How about a dinner out?" Minion offered, now feeling a little guilty.
"Yes, a dinner out! That's what I was going to do. A movie, too! Dinner, dancing, movie! All that romantical stuff that girls just go crazy for! You know, no problem for such a Cosonavo like myself." Megamind said, placing a hand to his chest with such modest it would make anyone impressed. Returning to his breakfast, which had somehow lessened in size and scope since the last time he looked at it, he picked up the last bit of toast and ate it.
"Cosonavo?" Minion asked himself quietly, wondering just what that meant. Whatever it was, it must have been pretty impressive for his boss to refer to himself as such. Sadly though their quiet morning was interrupted when the Brain Bots, still fighting over the scraps of food they had pilfered off of their daddy's plate, tumbled their way into the kitchen and Megamind got caught in the middle. After many biting, screaming and bleeding the Brain Bots hurried away, leaving Minion to tend to the bruised mess that was Megamind. It wouldn't be right for him to see anyone on such an important day looking like he had just gotten out of a fight with a hundred evil cats, oh no.
Once the invisible car was prepared (as well as located) and Megamind dressed in his usual black leather and spikes, he got into the car and left Minion to do his usual thing which no doubt included changing the bed, doing the washing for both clothes and bedsheets, cleaning up after breakfast as well as the Brain Bots, and many other things no doubt. He was a busy fish and kept himself rightfully so when Megamind wasn't around.
He paused though, before heading back indoors. The skies that had been fore casted as clear and good for a June morning were anything but. Dark, intimidating, ominous thick and large clouds were moving in on a quick Westerly breeze. It was growing so quick, so rapidly, he would wear that somebody had stolen the floating smoke machine and was using it for their own personal gain. Looking to the ceiling of the lair though, he saw the smoke machine strung up on ropes. So no, it couldn't be that.
"I better keep he washing inside to air..." he mumbled to himself before backing up, and closed the door. The Brain Bots, having been scolded for being naughty, were hovering around in a nervous manner. Their joints were clanking as their single eyes darted around as the light outside began to vanish from the invading darkness. Minion yelped as a whole group of them suddenly dashed past him, flying higher, in order to hide up in the shadows of the ceiling.
"What's gotten into you guys?" Minion asked as he went over to the boom box, turning it on. However, instead of hearing the calm, soothing sounds of rock and roll all he was met with was the crackle of static. "Huh?" he reached over and moved the tuning knob only to discover there was crackling static on every single radio. This had never happened before, maybe there was something with the reception wire? He fiddled with it, turning the tuning knob as he did. Still no sound came to meet him.
Not being the type of fish to do his lair work in absolute silence, Minion began singing to himself as he went about doing the dishes. He was certainly not worrying about why there was no signal on the radio, or how the skies had become incredibly dark incredibly quick. And he was certainly not worrying about his boss out there in the weather, absolutely not. It wasn't just that he cared for Megamind like he was destined to, but there was a bond not many people knew about. In fact, Minion doubted even Ms. Ritchi knew of the connection between her favorite aliens.
This bond was integral to the survival of the fish in the robot suit. Not only did he watch his master because he loved to do it, but because he had to. If, heaven forbid, Megamind were to die Minion would also meet his early end. To ensure not only his survival, he had to ensure that of his boss. Some would see this as a life sentence, one of servitude. It was hardly that. It was a symbiotic relationship. They, in turn, looked after one another. Just like how Minion and Megaminds' species had been doing for generations, long before the horrible end of the planet in a black hole large enough to swallow not only their planet, but a few neighboring one.
Minion didn't especially like thinking back to their lost planet. It brought on too many feelings he wasn't all too comfortable in thinking about, especially by himself. So he forced himself to sing The House of the Rising Sun as he did the dishes.
If only he, and Megamind, knew what kind of day it would become...