"Let Her Go" by Passenger
Disclaimer: I have no rights to the song "Let Her Go" nor to the series "Ghost Hunt".
(A.N.) This is going to be a three-part series. The next chapter will be themed after Pink's "Try", and will be Mai-centric. Also, I am looking for suggestions for a song for the third installment, which will be about Mai and Naru's reunion. Please let me know what you all think!
It was beginning to get too dark in the study to read. He hadn't noticed until the last possible moment, when the sun had almost completely set. Dark blue eyes narrowed in annoyance of being interrupted.
Oliver stood, only noticing how stiff he was as his legs straightened. The young man rolled his shoulders, wincing silently. Perhaps he had overdone it. He supposed that Luella did have a point that he was working far more than normal. Even Martin had remarked upon his extreme schedule the last time the two of them had been present for a meal.
He reached for the nearest lamp, pulling the small chain and thus flooding the room with soft golden light.
Absently, he ran a hand through already disheveled black hair. He had been working since sunrise, writing a new dissertation on dreams, pre-cognition, and telepathy. Sifting through the data had been tedious, though necessary, and he had run into a block when he realized that he hadn't decided yet which case study to primarily feature.
He sent a glare over his shoulder at the flurry of papers covering the large wooden desk. He had never had such problems before.
His mood darkened further when he looked out the window. The dying sun was rapidly being covered by swift, snow-laden clouds. It looked as if winter was coming early to England. Of course, he griped silently, England is hardly the land of the sun. He was not overly fond of winter, or necessarily of cloudy days. Despite his general demeanor, which he knew most people found to be cold, he enjoyed sunshine.
Temper sharpened by the impending promise of snow, Noll reseated himself at the desk and began to re-sort the papers into more ordered stacks. His pale hands paused on one set, staring down at the picture neatly clipped to the printed data and personal accounts. The picture of was of his former assistant, Mai Taniyama. The picture had been cropped from a larger, very informal photograph. She was smiling wide and her eyes were looking slightly to the left of the camera.
Tension bound his arms and shoulders, an unidentifiable feeling squeezing his chest, suffocating him. He did not like the feeling. He did not like that he… Well, that he missed her.
Noll shoved the paper away in frustration. He had not thought that he would become so attached to Japan, or to anyone in Japan. But he had. He had never felt anything similar to homesickness before this moment. And while his adoptive parents and his career were here in England, he had never really considered it his home. It was a place he stayed because it was convenient.
But as he sat in gloom, noting disdainfully fat white globs of snow were falling, he realized that he genuinely missed Japan. And his missed Mai. He knew what Gene would say if he was still around. Idiot scientist. He supposed he deserved that, given his response to Mai admitting her feelings for him. Not that he would ever admit it.
He had let her go, and he regretted it.
Noll did not regret his decisions often. In fact, he could count the number times he had on one hand. He also never repeated past mistakes.
Tiredly, he reached for the now cold cup of tea that Luella had dropped off hours earlier. He stared down at the dark liquid, knowing it wouldn't taste as good cold. It also would never taste as good as the tea Mai used to make in the tiny kitchenette at the SPR office in Shibuya.
It was odd. He had never considered himself happy in Japan. He had been too busy working, searching for Gene's body. However, now that it was over and he was back in England, misery weighing in the back of his mind… He realized that he had been at the very least content in Japan. And being content was more than he had after Gene had died.
Mai had offered him a chance to be more than content.
He had tried, at first, to justify walking away. There was the lingering doubt that she had transposed her feelings for Gene onto him. More than that, he had convinced himself that everything living which he truly touched (and let touch him back) were doomed to ruin.
None of those justifications kept Mai from his mind. Whenever he closed his eyes, he could almost hear her in his mind. She was the only person, aside from Lin, who ever argued with him, who challenged him. At the same time, she was the only person other than Gene who had ever just forgiven him for insensitivity in the ways of human interaction. Infuriatingly, she cared.
And, God help him, he dreamed about her.
Sometimes the dreams were ordinary: made up situations, memories, fantasies (which he would never ever discuss with anyone), and other such things.
Sometimes they were more. He knew, with no one telling him, about how she had broken her wrist after a nasty fall she taken in her P.E. class. He knew she had done well on her most recent history paper. He knew many things that he shouldn't know. It was maddening, not the least because his abilities had never encompassed any sort of E.S.P. before now, with the exception of his twin-telepathy with Gene.
Noll leaned back in his chair, letting his head fall back so he could look at the ceiling. Every time he woke up from those dreams, both the ordinary and the not so ordinary, he felt empty, like piece of him was missing. He knew it was more than just Gene being gone. He had compared his current feelings to how he felt looking for his brother's. That loss was still there. But there was more to it now.
He already knew that he had feelings for Mai. Those feelings were becoming annoying, only growing in her absence from his life. He supposed there was only one question left to consider.
A small voice, which sounded much like Gene, whispered in the back of his mind. Will you let her go?
Noll's fingers drummed on the arm of the chair. He supposed it was ironic to only realize that he loved her after he had let her go once. A frown pulled the corners of his lips. He was nothing if not determined. When he wanted something, he got it.
He reached over to the sleek black phone taking up one corner of the desk. The number was a memorized one, and his fingers punched the number without much thought.
He did not say hello when the line was picked up. "Book us tickets on the next flight to Japan."
There was a slight pause before the other man answered. "How long will we be staying?"
"For as long as necessary. I need more data to finish my work."
"…Of course, Noll."
Noll hung up, stood, and left the room to begin packing, turning on the hallway lights as he went. He needed the light now that the sun was low on the horizon.
In another part of the Davis house, Houjo Lin smiled. Finally.
(A.N.) Please leave reviews! They make me happy inside! :)