Gone
Rating: PG/K+
Genre: Romance/Tragedy
Summary: God comes to visit Atropos, and delivers her some news. Spoilers for S6 finale. Balthazar/Fate "Atropos".
Author's Note: WHY AM I TORTURING MYSELF LIKE THIS? (Sobs)
Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural. IF I DID, 6.22 WOULD HAVE NEVER HAPPENED! (Sobs)
()()()()()()
Atropos had not expected Castiel.
He'd been steering clear of her since the incident with the Titanic. While Balthazar had bothered her and prodded her and flirted shamelessly with her, Castiel had kept his distance and kept it well. He didn't want another confrontation with her.
Until now, apparently.
It wasn't until she was fully facing him that she noticed something different. Wrong.
He was way too powerful.
"Castiel?" She cocked an eyebrow at him, studying him carefully. "What's up with you?"
Castiel smiled, and Atropos shivered. Normally when Castiel smiled, it was very pleasant, as he was usually so serious. But this smile… This wasn't a soft, friendly smile, or even a sad one.
This one looked a little unbalanced.
"Atropos," He greeted. "I am God."
A two and a half minute silence followed that declaration.
During that time, Atropos blinked precisely one hundred and fifty-seven times. The large leather book detailing her day-to-day work actually slipped from her arms and fell to the carpeted floor of the library of her and her sisters' home in Perugia. Her glasses may have slipped down the bridge of her nose.
"Pardon?"
"I am God."
So simply stated.
Between the smile and the bluntness with which he stated that apparent fact, Atropos was tempted to call him crazy or make some other kind of witty remark regarding Castiel's sanity and its current location.
But it was looking truer and truer with every passing moment.
She hadn't felt this kind of energy since she'd last had a chat with the man upstairs herself. However whacko it sounded, however whacko Castiel sounded…
It looked like he was serious.
Atropos took in a deep breath only to find that her chest felt a little tight.
Oh, right.
That was fear.
She'd never been actively afraid of God. He'd given her and her sisters a job, and they had done that job very well. She had never given him reason to be angry with her. But Castiel- She had threatened him. And his friends. She'd given him trouble. There was a very real likelihood, given his apparent current state of mind, that he could kill her. Or maim her. And possibly her sisters as well.
"Did you- ah- want something?" She asked, smoothing her now sweating palms over her blazer. Castiel gave her that eerie smile again and she shivered.
"Do you bow before me?"
Oh, goody. He was psycho. She took a deep breath.
"Y-Yeah, sure." And for good measure, she bowed at the waist to him. She felt like an idiot the entire time, but was motivated by her desire to not get blown up at the snap of his fingers.
"Good. I have yet to decide what is going to happen next. You may yet have your job back, Atropos."
She shivered at that, but was slightly cheered at the notion of having her job back and actually knowing what was going to happen again. She leaned down and picked her book off the floor.
"I'm surprised you came here yourself," She said it casually, but chose every word very, very carefully. "I'd think you have better things to do. You could have just sent Balthazar."
"Balthazar is dead."
Atropos froze.
She had been in the process of straightening up again, and was now stuck with her knees slightly bent, almost as though she were bowing again. The book fell from her hands once more, but this time she didn't seem to hear it hit the ground.
She tried to take another deep breath, and found that she was completely incapable of doing so.
Castiel must have, with his God-hood, gained the ability to read minds, though, because he nodded. "Yes, Atropos, he is dead. He turned on me, and I killed him. I know you loved him."
His words felt like a solid blow to the stomach. Half of it was the wording: Atropos had never even thought the words 'love', even if that was what she had felt. The other half was the totally unaffected tone with which Castiel spoke those words, like he wasn't talking about the brother he'd served with and loved, like he wasn't telling the woman who loved his brother that he had murdered him in cold blood.
Atropos slowly sank back to the ground, hands resting on the book again. This time, though, she didn't try to stand up. Castiel looked down at her, still with that totally unmoved expression.
"You're angry at me."
Hell, he had precognition now. She hadn't even begun to feel the anger yet.
"I loved him." Atropos said numbly, not really feeling the words when she said them. "And you killed him." Castiel shrugged.
"I don't care if you're angry with me. Many are angry with God. All I care about is that you serve me." Atropos' jaw was clenched tightly, painfully. "You will serve me, won't you?"
"I don't see," Atropos grit out, "Any other option. Do you?" Castiel paused, honestly giving that some thought. He really had gone off the deep end.
"You could refuse," He said. "But I'd kill you. So if you want to live, then yes, that would be your only choice."
"Then I guess I'm serving you." Atropos said tightly.
"Good."
"Where is Balthazar?" She needed to see this for herself. There was no way she was going to take this lunatic's word for it until she saw a body for herself. Balthazar was tricky: He'd faked his death once, deceived Castiel once, maybe he'd done it again.
Yes. That was it.
He'd tricked him.
And later she'd find him sipping wine and knee-deep in debauchery, and she would kick his ass for scaring her so badly.
Atropos latched onto that idea as she stood up again. It was what kept her steady and strong when she met Castiel's eyes again and he told her where Balthazar's body was.
()()()()()()()
There were a lot of dead angels.
Atropos recognized them all as Castiel's followers. The ones that had joined him in the hopes that they might lead better lives than what they'd had. The ones that had trusted him probably until the bitter end, believing that whatever Castiel was up to, he was doing it to help.
And the sick part was that Atropos knew that he probably had.
Castiel was not evil. He was not bad. Whatever he'd done, whatever the outcome, he had done it with the best intentions in mind.
He'd just come a little unhinged along the way.
Atropos saw the edge of a burnt wing on the white tile floor as she entered the room, and her breath caught at the back of her throat. She swallowed convulsively, shut her eyes, and then forced herself further into the room.
It was him.
He was on his stomach. Castiel had stabbed him from behind. The hole in the back of his jacket was consistent with the part of the sword nearest to the hilt, wider and thicker. His eyes were shut. His mouth was slightly open.
Balthazar was dead. Without question.
If he hadn't been, he would have left this house by now. Would have gone into hiding already.
But that didn't stop her from sinking down next to him and placing a shaking hand on his back. She could feel ash under her fingertips. He had shown her his wings once; they had been steel blue, and he had 'accidentally' hit her with one when he'd taken flight. It hadn't hurt, but it had knocked her glasses askew, and she'd shouted at him to watch where he put his wings if he wanted to have them for much longer and he had laughed told her that he would just love to watch her try because there was no way that she would ever try to harm an angel, not in heaven, not where their Father would see and punish her accordingly, not that Balthazar would let him, because he liked Atropos and however uptight she was, it was fun for him to make her drop her composure and even smile sometimes-
Atropos let out a choked sob.
She set her book aside and slid down to rest her head on his back, snuffling pitifully in an attempt to hold back the more wrenching sobs.
He was never going to bother her again.
Their new God had seen to that.
And for the first time, Atropos was dreading receiving her new orders.
-End
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(Howls, then runs off to sob in the corner again)