Disclaimer: I don't own Nightwalker. I just don't.

Summary: My take on Shido's thoughts at the ending of Episode 12.

Author's Note: This is my first fic ever so don't be mean to me. I'm mature enough to handle constructive criticism but I don't think I could handle slander. It's been several days since I watched the last episode so the dialogue and scenes may not be exactly the same but the gist is the same.

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Newfound Emotions

by Aura Jade

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Chapter 1

            With a quick thrust of his hand, Shido's blood sword stabbed into Riho's chest. Before he could even blink his eyes, Riho's form crumbled to dust and blew away. Pain crashed through his heart as he realized what he had done and a dark blackness started to spread throughout his body…suffocating him…killing him. He had just killed the brightness in his life.

            "What have I done!!!"

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            Shido's eyes snapped open as he gasped for air. He was sitting at his desk in his office. Yayoi was sitting on the couch calmly drinking some coffee while Guni floated nearby. Riho was on her way to the kitchen carrying a tray but she spun around upon hearing Shido's gasp.

            "Shido-san, are you alright?" Riho asked, her big brown eyes full of concern.

            Shido sat there, barely registering that he was being asked a question. He was slumped over the desk with his elbows holding him up. His hands trembled near his face as he drew ragged breaths. His blue-green eyes, so full of anguish, stared lifelessly ahead, indicating that he was still locked in his own world.

            'I killed her,' Shido thought. 'I killed my Riho. My Riho...but that wasn't her.' An image of Riho's amber and evil vampire eyes came to his mind.  'That creature was nothing like her.  Riho is kind and pure-hearted. That couldn't have been her. But it was still her body and I killed her and it hurts more than hell because…because…because I love her.'

            'I love her. I love her.' The words repeated themselves through Shido's head as he slowly began to become aware of his surroundings. He was no longer standing aboard some dark ship. He was no longer alone after killing his love. Across the room, Yayoi was looking at him inquisitively and next to his desk, Riho and Guni were bickering softly.

            'She's here! She's alive! I didn't kill her after all.' Relief flooded through Shido's body and hope flared through his heart as he thought of how he was given a second chance to tell her how he felt about her. Shido already knew that Riho loved him, it was so obvious, but she definitely didn't know about how he felt. Shido looked forward to telling (and showing) her just how much he loved her but first he needed to find out who or what caused those visions that he had.

            As if on cue, an evil laughter floated across the air as darkness began to seep through the room. "I only showed you what was in the depths of your very heart," said an equally evil voice to match the laughter. The image of Shido's former lover and maker appeared at the door.

            "Cain!" Shido cried out in anger and in shock as he jumped up at his desk.

            "Don't move!" Yayoi shouted as she whipped out her gun and aimed it at Cain's heart.

            Cain merely smirked as he transported through Yayoi and stopped in front of Riho, who stood clutching the forgotten tray to her chest. Cain's hand reached up to gently grasp Riho's chin, forcing her to look into his eyes. For the life of her, she couldn't tear her eyes away.

            "I knew I was right to put you under his care," Cain murmured softly to Riho as his thumb gently caressed her jaw.

Riho swallowed audibly and frustrated tears began to form behind her eyes because she did not want to be standing here with his hand on her face and she did not want to be staring into Cain's eyes but she couldn't move. She couldn't do anything. There was something in his eyes that forced her to stay.

            Shido was in a similar state. From the moment Cain entered the room, Shido's body stiffened and refused to move. He was aware that this was due to Cain and the bond that they shared because Cain was his maker. Normally, Shido could ignore the bond but after the emotional ride he had earlier due to the visions, Shido was understandably weaker.

Shido watched helplessly as Cain approached Riho. Anger began to build within him as he watched Cain touch her face. He saw the fear and helplessness in Riho's eyes and the desire to protect his Riho began to build within his body. He watched Cain's head move closer to Riho's as if he were going to kiss her and the anger and protectiveness overfilled Shido's body giving him the strength to overcome Cain's bond.

"You will not hurt her," Shido commanded as he swiftly jumped between Riho and Cain.

To be continued…