I Need Some Sleep

Chapter 1

"Hey, I have an idea, kid, why don't you eat something, huh? Seriously, you look like you're auditioning for Les Misérables." Jesse glared at him weakly, then rested his head back with a sigh.

"Not hungry…" He muttered. Saul watched the pale eyes close very slowly, squeeze tightly then open again, half-lidded and desperate the close again.

"Kid…I'm not trying to be a Nagging Nelly here but, uh…how long has it been since you got any sleep?" he asked, frowning at the young man. Jesse looked at him for as long as the electrode-less body would allow before his eyes forced themselves shut again.

"Um…Jesus, I don't know…" he said with a sigh. Saul sighed, running his hand through his hair, then made a decision. He grabbed Jesse's arm and pulled him up into a standing position. "Hey, man, what the fu-" he attempted to yell but he stopped, eyes closing again and he swayed a little at the sudden loss of blood in his head. Saul grabbed him by the waist before he could collapse, seeing him go pale, holding the impossibly slim body to his own chest in an effort to steady him.

"Ok, kid, are we done with the rebellious teenage angst bullshit now because you're really starting to scare me. I can't have you dropping dead in my office, ok? I don't have the insurance. I'm taking you to my place and we can sort you out with some food and somewhere for you to crash." Jesse moaned in reply, his brain finally failing to come up with a retort from sleep deprivation.

Still holding Jesse, Saul called Francesca on his office phone. "Frannie, can you cancel all my appointments for today, please. I'm taking Mr. Pinkman home before he literally dies in my arms." There was a pause before she replied

"Ok."

Saul sighed and rolled his eyes. He picked up his bag from the desk and half carried Jesse out of the office, telling Huelle to follow so he could open the car for him, his arms being more or less occupied.

"Shit, man, kid looks like death warmed up." His bodyguard said, frowning at the shadow of the former Jesse Pinkman.

"Tell me about it. Can you open the passenger door for me, Huelle?" he asked. He did so and Saul thanked him, placing Jesse inside his Cadillac, finding the kid was easily pliable so arrangement into the vehicle was easy. Saul then pulled his seatbelt on, leaning over him to click it safely in place. He sighed and stood up, closing the door.

"You need me anymore today, boss?" Huelle asked. Saul loosened his tie, shaking his head.

"No, no, you and Frannie can go on home. I'll see you both in the morning…" he glanced at the young man in the car "maybe.." he added. He waved Huelle goodbye as he headed back inside and got in the car, starting the engine and pulling out of the lot, heading to his own apartment.

Jesse was silent for the whole journey, making Saul worry slightly, but his eyes were open, if barely, and his face was pressed against the cool glass of window, watching the scenery pass him by. Saul didn't attempt any conversation, knowing it was pointless, so he settled with putting the radio on. Now he knew Jesse was out of it, Barry Manilow was playing and he didn't even curl his lip in disgust, nothing.

Saul drove to his apartment and parked, practically dragging Jesse up to his place. Leaving the young, clearly damaged man on his sofa, Saul went into the kitchen and made a call he never wanted to make.

"Yes?"

"Walter, it's me. Guess who is currently on death's door sitting on my couch."

"He's with you?" Alright, Walt, no need to sound so surprised. Saul rolled his eyes.

"Yes, he came to my office and started smoking dope in my damn waiting room and then he was in my office and looked like he was about to pass out so I brought him to my place. Kid's sick, man, he hasn't slept or eaten in God knows how long – did you know about this?"

"I knew he was going through a rough patch after his girlfriend and Gale and everything." The asshole spoke like there was nothing he could do, just matter-of-fact and 'kids will be kids'.

"Well, I'm gonna keep an eye on him for a while. So he won't be at work for a few days at least." Walt sighed like this was huge inconvenience for him.

"Fine, do what you need to do." He said gruffly and hung up. Saul clenched his jaw, resisting the urge to throw the phone very hard at a wall, and went back in to see Jesse.

The kid was in the same exact position as before, his eyes half lidded and his face lax and puffy-eyed from total lack of rest.

Saul assessed the situation.

The kid was obviously starving, his face overly gaunt and his over-sized clothes hung off his small frame even more than they usually do, but Saul doubted he'd be willing to eat anything.

He was also completely exhausted and probably needed sleep more than he needed anything right now. Saul sighed and went over to sit beside him, the young man barely noticing his presence.

"Hey, uh, Jesse…you wanna go take a nap? I've got a memory foam mattress, Egyptian cotton sheets, huh…?" Jesse didn't react. Saul sighed, giving up. "Ok…you want something to drink? How about some coffee? Get that little noggin of yours working again?" Jesse glanced at him and Saul took that as a yes and grinned, heading back into the kitchen. He brewed up a cup of decaf and slipped two Valium tablets (leftovers from ex-in-law visits) in there for good measure, returning to hand it to Jesse. Luckily, the kid seemed conscious enough to recognize it and took a sip, despite it having just been boiled.

"Thanks…" he whispered, eyes down. Saul smiled.

"No problem, kiddo, any time.." he muttered, loosening his tie. He turned on the TV, making sure to put it on something he knew Jesse liked: WWE Wrestling. He watched Jesse's eyes find the TV and stay on it, obviously eager for something to occupy his mind for a while. He sipped on his coffee almost mechanically, eyes fixed on the screen. Saul relaxed back and watched it too, waiting until Jesse would finally fall asleep so he could put him to bed and he could have a drink.

"Hey…" he was almost startled at Jesse's voice, looking at him quickly. The kid's eyes were still on the screen, slightly glazed looking like he'd just sniffed a bump.

Oop, looks like the Valium's started kicking in. Saul thought. "You ever wonder…who picks their costumes..? Like, do they choose it themselves, 'cause…why would you want to wear a one-piece like that, you know…?" Oh, Jesus, the kid was a high as a kite.

"Yeah, no, I don't know to be honest with you, kid…" Saul said, trying to keep the jittery little son of a bitch relaxed.

"'M so tired…" he whispered, like he was about to break. Saul was quickly by his side, hand on the kid's back.

"You wanna go to bed?" he asked, treating him like a child purposefully. It was the safest course of action when someone was this tweaked. Jesse nodded, rubbing one eye with his sleeve-covered hand. "Ok, let's get you to bed then, shall we?" he asked, keeping his voice soft and soothing. Jesse gave another nod and Saul pulled him up gently, keeping one hand on his back for security, using the other to guide him towards the bedroom.

He deposited Jesse to sit on the bed, watching the kid in case he got spooked or something. He knelt down and removed Jesse's shoes and socks then stood to take off his hoodie before getting him to lie down, his head resting on the plump pillows. His eyes closed instantly and he curled into himself, burying his face into the soft hill of goose down.

Saul's heart broke at the child-like response to a soft, warm bed and he covered the kid up with the thick winter comforter, tucking him in before turning off the light and leaving the door slightly ajar and the hall light on, in case Jesse woke up and freaked out, not knowing where he was.

Saul collapsed back on the couch with a sigh, turning the channel to his favorite old movie channel, settling back to enjoy the security of knowing where Jesse was for once. It was ridiculous how much he worried about the kid, but he was such an innocent soul, despite the drugs, that Saul felt morally obligated to keep him safe.

Not to mention, he was under the thumb of the formidable Heisenberg, and Mr. Walter White was worse. The bastard exploited and mistreated Jesse so seamlessly that it had taken Saul almost a year to realize he was systematically destroying the poor kid, like an emotionally abusive boyfriend.

Actually, yes, that was the perfect analogy for their fucked-up relationship. Jesse had been under Mr. White's control for so long and without ever really realizing that he'd become conditioned to deal with and be affected by Walt's psychotic, subjugating, manipulative bullshit that he couldn't walk away, not without help. Major Stockholm syndrome.

Saul was determined to keep Jesse safe this time, out of Walt's hands. He wanted to get him healthy again, and happy for the first time in maybe ever. Jesse had always struck him by how sad he was, despite his cocky self-assured exterior. He knew his parents barely spoke to him and Mr. White had once told him that he was the only teacher to ever even try to help Jesse back in high school, which didn't bode well for the rest of Jesse' academic and personal growth. His meth-head friends who, though genuine in their affection towards him, and him to them, were no good for him. Not to quote Pink Floyd but they were just another brick in the wall, blocking his path.

Saul could tell Jesse was smart, a lot smarter than anyone gave him credit for, including Mr. White and himself. The kid needed praise, craved it really. It was obvious nobody ever cared enough to tell him 'good job, Jesse, well done', at least not without an ulterior motive.

He was determined to give Jesse his life back.