I'm in the woods. Not the woods from my home, district 12. Oh no. These are the woods from the Arena. These woods with their towering trees and little light will never put me at ease. Never.
'Katniss.'
I whirl around at the whisper of my name. I know who whispered my name, but I can't see her. All I see are the trees. The haunting trees.
'Katniss.'
My name is whispered again. The voice is coming from the trees, but I still can't see the whisperer. Ten, she jumps down. She jumps from the highest branch of the tallest tree, yet she appears unhurt in her crouched position. When she stands straight, however, I see that she is hurt. So hurt that I'll never be able to fix her. She has a hole right through her torso, which is letting out a steady stream of blood. She looks me in the eyes. Her brown eyes burning through my grey ones. I know that she will never forgive me for not saving her in time. I see the dried up tears of blood on her cheeks and I see the fresh ones replacing them. The tears are my fault. I'm the reason that they'll never stop falling.
Suddenly, two other people come. I see myself and Marvel, the one who murdered Rue. I see myself killing Marvel. As soon as my weapon comes in to contact with his body, he turns to ash and blows away in the wind. But, not before he throws hi spear at Rue and it fits perfectly through the hole in her torso. Rue disappears too. The wind carries her away and now I'm left with myself. The other Katniss. The one who takes away the lives of children.
I look into her eyes and see that they are guiltless. They are hungry. They want more.
I run. I run away from this evil Katniss. I run through the trees and bushes, as far away from her as I can get.
When I stop, I find myself at the edge of the forest. I see Gale placing a bomb in a clear meadow. He runs away from it without trying to cover it up, or hide it. I wait, behind the leaves of the trees, to see who will die.
It's Prim.
She walks right to the bomb and sits down next to it, waiting for it to blow her up. I scream her name and try to run to her, but I bump into an invisible wall. I punch and kick and scratch the wall, but it doesn't give in. It doesn't let me save Prim. It's forcing me to let her die.
Then, the jabberjays start.
Peeta screams. My mother screams. Gale screams. Rue screams. Johanna, Haymitch, Rory, Vick, Posy, Cinna. They all scream. I pull my hair out and scream along with them. All our screams overlap each other, until one scream silences us all.
Prim's scream.
It's not a jabberjay who creates her scream. It's Prim. She's screaming and for a split second I can see her screaming. I see her being blown up by the bomb. I hear the silence as her screams stop.
The invisible wall disappears and allows me to walk to the meadow. I sit where Prim sat, on the blackened grass, and cry. The smoke is bringing even more tears to my eyes and I fear that the tears will never stop raining down. For now, I let myself cry. I let myself feel guilty for my sister's death. I try to convince myself that it wasn't me who killed her. It was Gale. I couldn't do anything to save her. But, these attempts are pathetic.
I look down at my hands and see that they are covered in blood. All of the blood that I have spilt.
'Katniss,' says Peeta.
I look up and see him standing in front of me. I feel relief and hope. Peeta will help me. He will help me wash off the blood. But, when I look at his face properly, I know he isn't here to help me. He's here to make sure the blood stays.
'Katniss,' he says again. 'You killed them. You killed my friends. My family. You burnt down district 12. You let the Capitol win. All you ever do is cause pain. It's the only thing you can do.'
He chants this and other people join in. Prim. Rue. Cinna. My mother. Johanna. Finnick. Annie. Gale. Mags. Madge. Hazelle. Everyone. Everyone that has died or has been caused pain because of me.
Peeta walks up to me, still chanting, and puts his hands around my neck.
I let him because it's what I deserve.