Title: My Untitled Everyone Is Gay Drabble
Pairings: Too many to count.
Rating: M? It's not explicit but there is sex.
Summary: Well, everyone is gay and it's weirding Harry out.
A/N: I wrote this a long time ago and just found it.
Disclaimer: Not my charaters. Not for profit. Just for fun. J.K Rowling invented all these lovely people.
Harry walked through the Great Hall slowly because the minute he had walked in he was suspicious. Suspicious of... everyone really. Something was off, way off. What was it though?
Harry wondered if it was the fact that the various house tables were smattered with different colours, or if it was that Snape and Dumbledore were sitting a bit too closely and McGonagal and Trelawny were holding hands. Now that he thought about it though, everyone was acting weird. It was as if... as if they had all, suddenly, miraculously, become gay. And horny... because Harry could see someone's foot giving someone elses crotch a good rub down.
Deciding not to join in the madness Harry went to the Astronomy Tower. Bad idea really. Or maybe it was a good idea? Because he was standing at the door watching Blaise Zabini bugger Zacharias Smith senseless... Or maybe he was buggering some sense into him? Harry couldn't tell. Zacharias did not have much sense though so he hoped it was the latter. Feeling like some weird pervert, Harry decided to try going to the library.
That was another bad idea on his part because now he could see more than five couples that either had their hand down someone's pants, were snogging dangerously or were too horny to spell away their clothes and were frotting against one another. Dean and Seamus (saw that one coming... er... yeah. Bad choice of words), Padma and Lavender, Millicent and... Pansy, Hermione and Ginny (what?), Ron and Neville (Merlin no... what was going on?), and in the corner Theodore Nott and... oh dear Merlin... Gregory Goyle... It was no wonder Harry found himself fleeing the library and heading towards the Quidditch pitch. Surely no more horny-just-turned-gay students/ teachers were there.
Panting, Harry lay in the grass. A few moments later he frowned as a shadow was cast over him. It was Malfoy. Beautiful, blond, bratty Malfoy.
"Potter?" he asked, and Harry sat up, grabbed his hand, pulled him down and attacked. With his lips of course. Because if everyone else had chosen today to become gay and carry on like hippogriffs in heat, so could Harry. With his long time rival/crush/random-shag-when-they're-drunk, Draco.
And carry on like hippogriffs in heat they did! So much so that Harry and Draco both decided it was silly to even attempt sitting down on their bums...