I am evil. :) Manipulating the way SM ended the book in order for it to fit my personal taste. Hopefully this ends up being as good as it sounded in my head.

"And your love was right in my path; in my grasp, and me and you belong." - Beyonce, "Smash Into You"

You know the saying "you don't know what you have until it's gone"? I never had her; she was never mine. But with every closing of my eyes, glimpses of her face get caught inside of my head, making me not want to ever open my eyes again. Every day, her disappearance replays itself; never ending. She was gone. Leah was gone. And it was my fault.

*FLASHBACK*

"I imprinted, Leah." I couldn't stand to look at her. I shuffled my feet, kicking up dirt and leaves as I did so.

"I-i-imprinted?" she managed to stammer out, and I knew she was trying to hold back tears that were threatening to spill over.

I don't know how it had happened. All I know is that the moment I laid eyes on Renesmee, something inside me triggered. I knew that I had to be with that little girl at all times; protecting her.

"Who?" she asked. My eyes slowly met hers. I saw the pain in hers. I wanted to run away.

"Renesmee." I heard a laugh, but then it was gone. Leah was gone. I bit the inside of my cheek, trying to stop myself from screaming out her name. I loved Leah with everything in me. I had thought she was the one for me. I wanted her to be the one for me. We were perfect together. She was perfect for me and I was perfect for her. We dreamed of getting married, but all the future plans we had made together were flushed down the train.

*/FLASHBACK*

I picked myself up from off my bed. My legs carried me to the room next to my own, where twelve-year-old Renesmee sat.

"Hi, Jakey!" she exclaimed, feeling my presence. Thoughts ran through my head. Someday I was going to marry this girl. It was in my destiny. It went against everything that our tribe had believed in, but didn't most things? Apparently nothing likes playing by the rules.

"Hey, Nessie." I walked into the room and sat down next to her. I just needed to be in her atmosphere. Something about being around her calmed me, and I needed to be calmed. Leah's face, her eyes, her lips, her voice..they all repeated themselves over and over again in my head. Renesmee knew.

"What's wrong?" For being a twelve year old girl, she knew more than most.

"Nothing, just thinking about things," I replied, not wanting to begin talking about the one girl I truly could have loved to the one girl I'm destined to love.

She nodded her head, not wanting to press the issue. I allowed a sigh to escape through my pursed lips and I stood up, leaving the room.

I went back into my own room and laid down on the bed. I turned onto my side and closed my eyes. It had been years since I had last seen Leah. I needed to see her. I needed to see everyone from the pack. But they were all older now. Emily had become pregnant, and Sam decided to stop changing so that they could all become a real family. Everyone else had imprinted on human girls. They didn't need to deal with the pressures of imprinting on someone who wasn't even completely human.

The sound of rocks hitting my window snapped me out of my daze. I furrowed my brow and walked over to the window, opening it. Just as I was about to yell at whomever it was, I stopped. My voice was caught in my throat at the person who was standing two levels below me.

"Jacob," she whispered. My eyes glossed over with tears and I turned away from her. I didn't want her to see me like this, but it was too late. Before I knew it, she was inside of my room. Her scent filled my nose and I couldn't control myself anymore. I walked over to her, my hands gripped each tiny wrist, squeezing as hard as I possibly could. I was furious at her for disappearing like that.

"Years," I muttered. "It's been years, and nothing. Why didn't you call? Why didn't you tell anyone you were okay?"

"I don't know." Her voice was soft; scared. I loosened my grip on her.

"How long has it been?" I asked, my anger subsiding.

"Seventeen years."

"That's impossible. Renesmee's only twel..." My voice trailed off and my eyes closed. Renesmee had stopped aging and I hadn't even realized it.