Moments: That's All We Get

Summary: As Mark and Lexie walk through the halls of Seattle Grace/Mercy West Hospital, they each reminisce on some of their most meaningful moments—and they may even discover new ones.

Author's Note:

Sorry if the medical information is wrong; I just looked up a cool surgery. Enjoy. ;)

"That's all you get. That's it. Moments with the people you love…And they'll move on. And you'll want them to move on…But still, that is all you get. Moments."—Denny Duquette

Lexie Grey and Mark Sloan are walking side by side through the surgical wing during their lunch break. Mark has his fists uncharacteristically clenched at his sides, his face an odd mask of determination—interrupted only by faint flickers of fear. Lexie, oblivious to his peculiar behavior, is eagerly filling him in on one the circumstances that led to her assisting on a corpus callosotomy earlier that day.

"Okay, so we were explaining everything to the patient, Mrs. Rahterford, and after we briefed her on the surgery—you know, the temporal lobe is removed and the frontal and occipital lobes are disconnected," Lexie rattled off, looking towards Mark and getting more and more excited despite his rather preoccupied expression. "And then…Derek asked me if I wanted to scrub in! And I was like, 'Are you kidding me?' Because of course I'd love t—" Lexie breaks off abruptly as she looks to Mark's face for a reaction, only to find that he's no longer walking beside her.

If she had been paying attention to his distant behavior, she might have realized that something was bothering him. If she hadn't been so intent on telling him about her surgery, she might have realized that, not only had he fallen behind, but he had also stopped moving altogether. And if she was picking up on the surrounding conversations, she might have heard a few loud gasps, or even witnessed one person drop their stack of charts right on the ground.

When she looks behind her to see where he went, Lexie's breath suddenly catches in her throat and the moisture in her mouth evaporates, rendering her utterly and completely speechless.

"Lex?" Mark calls out tentatively, looking up at her face. As his tone of voice registers within her ears, she has a vivid flashback to the night he confessed he was still in love with her—the night they had gotten back together.

...

Lexie is signing off on some of her charts as a familiar voice calls out her name.

"Lex?"

She turns around, coming face to face with her ex-boyfriend. She stares up at him, wondering what he wants. He hasn't spoken to her—really spoken to her in weeks. Months, even. But now he's looking right into her eyes, into her soul. In this short moment, Lexie is sure that he can see what she's thinking as easily as if he were reading a book.

"I'm still in love with you," he states without preamble, never taking his eyes off her. "I tried not to be…But it didn't work." He exhales quickly before continuing. "Sloane's gone. There's not baby. And I don't want to sleep around." His gaze tightens, and she's sure now—he can tell what she's thinking—he can read through her and see every one of her hidden desires… "I want a second chance. I'm in love with you."

Caught completely off-guard, Lexie fumbles for an excuse to erase what he has just said. It's as if he's teasing her, offering her exactly what she wants, only—and she's sure this will happen—to have it yanked away just as she's about to accept.

"Ka—Karev is…He's…" She falters, not even wanting to voice the words. Instead, she tries again, but remains just as vague as before. "Mark, I—I have a boyfriend…"

"I know," he says, his piercing blue eyes still locked with hers. "I'm saying you could have a husband." And without waiting for an answer, Mark walks out into the drizzling Seattle night.

Though he's been given no response to his confession, or any clue that she feels the same, Mark actually smiles for the first time in months. He's finally found some peace, however small. It's just a matter of time before we find out how long this fantasy will last, his pessimistic side nags at him. Still, though, his smile stays on his face—he's finally told her the truth and confronted his feelings.

...

She stares at his kneeling figure, her face frozen in a mix of shock and flattery. Her brain absent-mindedly recognizes that the traffic in the hallways has stopped—everything has fallen completely silent. Something so rare for a hospital, especially in the middle of a workday…

But all this is pushed aside as her eyes automatically zero in on the beautiful, sparkling diamond ring in her boyfriend's hand. There's no box, it's simply resting in the middle of Mark's palm, giving the impression that he's been carrying it around in his fist all day—or all week, maybe. With a sudden jolt, Lexie realizes that this is probably exactly what happened.

"I was wondering…" Mark begins slowly, his eyes transfixed on her face, oblivious to their audience as well, before he's interrupted in the single best way a person can be interrupted.

"Yes," Lexie breathes, barely audible, not even waiting for him to finish his proposal—something that he, no doubt, had been working on for weeks—maybe even months.

"R—Really?" He asks, half-afraid to hear her answer. Just because he know he has low expectations of himself doesn't mean he's actually been able to raise them.

"YES!" She shouts, swiftly closing the space between them in seconds and bending down just as he starts to stand up. She takes his face in her hands, kissing him soundly on the lips. He reacts immediately; kissing her back and pouring all the love and unshared emotion he has into that kiss. He wraps one hand around her neck, using the leverage to gently lift himself up to his feet, and uses the other to once again enclose his mother's ring within his hand.

The hallway, which was just moments ago deathly silent with anticipation and held breath, has now erupted into boisterous cheers and applause as Mark and Lexie wrap themselves into each other's embrace.

When they pull apart, Mark takes a step away so he can slip the ring onto Lexie's left hand. He slides it, ever so slowly, as if giving her a chance to back out. When she doesn't pull away, though, and the ring is secured on her finger, his face breaks into a huge grin and he kisses her passionately on the mouth, unable to control himself with the sudden burst of happiness within his chest.

It's the complete opposite of Mark and Lexie's most famous public display of affection. Instead of receiving glares and stunned looks from her coworkers, everyone nearby bursts into cheers and applause. Outside of their own little bubble, Callie Torres is screaming the loudest.

...

Lexie is filling out patient information on a laptop, a few yards away from her fellow interns. She can hear their muted conversations, but she's had so much practice blocking out their judgments that she couldn't understand them if she tried. Or, at least, that's what she tells herself.

The truth is, she's cognizant of every word, every disapproving mutter, and every complaint of her colleagues. And she's sick of it. So they don't understand the difference between favoritism and being the most qualified—that's their own damn fault. It's time to do something, she thinks. Time to show them that I'm not where I am because of Mark. Just then, as if called by some unseen force, her boyfriend enters through the surgical hall.

"Oh, here comes Sloan," Ryan mutters, causing the other three to snicker. Mark can hear them just as well as Lexie and he shoot the intern a dark look. Mark comes to a stop a few feet away from his girlfriend, reviewing his post-op charts before the end of the day. Lexie watches him as he approaches, and he glances at her quickly before looking back down.

Sighing, Lexie closes the distance between them in two short steps, taking his surprised face in her hands and kissing him passionately on the mouth—in front of everyone. She can tell he's taken aback by how he tries to pull away at first. But when her hand travels to the back of his neck, drawing him in closer, he kisses her back, leaning towards her instead of away. They are focused so closely on each other in this one exchange that they could swear that there was no one around—that they were alone, in their own private little bubble.

The interns just stand there, each with varying degrees of disapproval on their faces: Tyler's face shows a bit of jealousy as the girl next to him looks as if she's going to be sick. The man on the end is just dazed. Lexie trails her hand down Mark's chest, and holding him there lightly as she pulls away. She then exhales, looking up at him.

"Dr. Grey," Mark states, his voice slightly husky and amused at the same time. He immediately looks back to the gaggle of interns, but his eyes switch back to her as she leans into him, speaking quietly but loud enough that her coworkers can hear her.

"They think that you're taking advantage of me, they think that I'm using you. But they don't know us," Lexie says, shaking her head and smiling. "They think that we're ugly, but I know that we're beautiful," she says grinning. "And we can adapt to a hostile environment." Mark looks at her, his mouth curving up into a smile. She walks away without another word, past the interns and back through the surgical hall. He swivels on his heel, watching her go with a smug expression.

...

Mark pulls away after a moment and turns with his fiancée to face the assembled crowd. Just as he's about to speak, Derek bursts through the double door, an angry look on his face.

"What the hell is going on out here?" Derek asks gruffly, walking in from the nearby OR where he's had to leave surgery because of the commotion. No one answers him. No one even glances in his direction. Every doctor, nurse, and medical professional in the room has their eyes in one place. Mark and Lexie. They're standing together near the OR board, holding hands. As Derek's eyes shoot to their figures, his face clouds with suspicion.

"Mark? Little Grey? What's going on here? What's the secret that I seem to be left out of?"

...

Lexie walks quickly down the deserted hall to On-Call Room 3C. Though there's no one around, she takes a moment to check on either side before opening the door. Mark was waiting for her, and he jumps up as he sees her come in.

"Hi," he says, grinning widely. Lexie doesn't smile back, she just eases the door closed, her face somber.

"I don't want to keep secrets," she states bluntly.

"Sorry?"

"I've been keeping secrets. All day. About surgeries, and rings, and…you. And that secret, th—the you secret—it's giving me high blood pressure. And I don't want high blood pressure. I don't want that secret." She pauses, looking up at him. His face has grown just as serious as hers. "We're having…a relationship." Mark looks up at this, his eyes piercing hers. "And if we are, if we're in a relationship, then I need to be in it in front of my sister. And Derek Shepherd. If we can't do that…Then I—I can't do this." She takes one last look at him before turning and leaving.

Mark stands there, contemplating what she's just said. He realizes how close he is to losing her—over nothing—and he knows he can't let that happen.

...

"We're engaged," Mark says, unable to keep the grin of his face or the news to himself. Lexie kisses him on the cheek, elated like never before at just hearing those words.

Derek stops in his tracks, his face blank as his eyes shifting to Mark. His breath leaves him as his registers what Mark had just said.

...

Derek stands on the catwalk, his body hunched over the railing, his eyes downcast, lost in his own guilt and pity. If Mark wasn't so worried about telling him about his relationship with Lexie, he might have noticed that this really wasn't the best time for a conversation.

Nevertheless, he walks right up to Derek, ignoring all the signs. He stops a few feet away, rubbing his ear nervously. He takes a deep breath and then just decides to come right out with it. Say it all at once, get it over with—just like a band aid.

"I'm seein' Lexie. Well, I'm sleeping with her too," he adds, as Derek whips around. "But it's more than that. We're happy," he says sincerely. "I'm happy."

Before he can say another word, Derek cocks his fist back and punches Mark hard in the jaw. Mark's body is thrown to the side but he remains on his feet and turns to face his friend again, rubbing his jaw as Derek puts pressure on his injured hand.

"Okay, that's…Maybe I deserved that," he concedes before his anger skyrockets. "Oh, you know what? I didn't deserve that! You have no right to tell me who I can sleep with—" Mark manages before Derek punches him hard in the face again. This time, Mark punches back. He put so much power behind the punch that Derek ended up falling on the floor.

Seeing the score is set, Mark starts walking away, heading to get ice. But before he can walk fifteen feet, he hears a roar from behind him as Derek slams into his back, dragging him onto the ground and repeatedly striking him in the face. Mark soon shoves him off, gaining the upper hand and giving Derek a taste of his own medicine. Derek takes control, though, and shoves Mark off of him. Mark tumbles ten feet away, losing a shoe in the process. Derek launches himself towards his colleague, propelling them further down the catwalk. Mark punches him hard in return.

Though a crowd has gathered, the only sounds that can be heard are the grunts of the two doctors and the sickening slam as fists collide with flesh and bone. Mark and Derek continue to beat each other up, the scales tipping with each blow.

As they drag each other down to the ground, Mark cocks his arm back, punching Derek full-on in the face before Hunt pulls him off.

"Come on! Come on," Hunt growls, grabbing Mark by the shoulders and throwing him off the other doctor. Mark gets in one last good punch before Hunt physically removes Mark from the neurosurgeon's vicinity. Derek rolls on the ground, clutching his bleeding and most likely broken nose just as Meredith and Addison run up.

"It's done," Hunt grunts as he shoves Mark away from Derek. Meredith pushes past a stumbling Mark to help her boyfriend. Mark falls back down, unsteady and bleeding. He's got a large laceration across the left side of his forehead, just above his eyebrow and his jaw is starting to swell. His hand hurts like hell, but he can't worry about that right now. Mark smiles slightly at the realization:

Derek's been told. He knows. It's his own damn fault he decided to act like a drunk frat boy. He and Lexie are free to be who they are. Together.

...

Derek doesn't say anything, just walks swiftly up to the couple and hugs Mark hard, and then Lexie. He looks as if he's about to actually cry, but he composes himself quickly.

"Congratulations, you guys," Derek says, his smile almost as big as theirs. "I know how long you've been waiting for this," he says to Mark. Lexie just smiles, knowing that she'll be with the love of her life forever. And that he wants to be with her, too.

…

The recently engaged couple had been lying with each other for some time, just enjoying the togetherness of the moment. They each knew that an all-encompassing peace like this comes rarely, and they are doing their best to soak up every moment.

Mark has been watching her for some time, and, if he didn't know any better, he would have sworn she'd fallen asleep. He kisses her hair softly, and when she leans ever so slightly back into him, he can tell she is, in fact, awake. Just as he was about to lean over her shoulder and get her full attention, Lexie speaks.

"What were you going to say?" She asks quietly, her back pressed against him as he gently strokes her hair, bending down to kiss her head quietly every few moments.

"Hmm?" He asks absentmindedly between kisses.

"This afternoon—when you were proposing…What were you going to say?"

"Oh, nothing," he says brushing it off. Trying to distract her, his hand glides smoothly down her side, trailing towards her naked thigh.

"C'mon," she prompts, snatching his hand away and kissing his inner palm lightly. Damn it, Mark thinks, knowing that—one she's got an idea in her head—she won't stop until she gets what she wants. At any other time, her determination would be something he liked and admired. But now…Well, now it was just annoying—and soon to be embarrassing. "Tell me."

"It was nothing. Really. It was just stupid, you know, corny stuff," Mark mutters, trying to appease her without giving her any information.

"No, I don't know," she replies, turning around to face him.

"Well, whose fault is that?" He shoots back, grinning. "I wouldhave said it all if someone hadn't cut me off…"

"Oh, please," Lexie says, rolling her eyes but still smiling. "You loved it."

"Mm, yes I did," he murmurs, leaning closer to kiss her lovingly on the lips. She kisses him back at first but then pulls away, intent on weaseling the information out of him.

"Tell me. Please," she implores him, looking up at him with puppy-dog eyes.

"You're mean," he states, knowing that she's trying to trick him, but letting her get away with it.

"So? You're evasive."

"Very true," he concedes, smiling. He pauses for a moment before looking down and letting out a defeated sigh. "I was…going to ask you if you still loved me," Mark says slowly, pausing to silence her protests with a quick kiss. "I was going to ask if you saw your future…"

"Because I see mine," he states clearly, looking up at her as her gaze flickers between his eyes and the ring. "And you're there, right beside me, every step of the way." He takes a deep breath, glancing down at the ring before looking back up. "I love you, Lexie. And when you tell me that you love me too, I believe you. Because I know you. Because I want you and I need you.

This past year has been the best and the worst of my life. There were times when I didn't think any of what I struggled through was worth the effort…There were times when I just wanted to give up. But you were always there. You were my constant. You were the one I counted on, even when we were falling apart. You showed me what the right thing was. You showed me what to do. I loved you then and I love you now. And I promise to love you forever. Because of you, I know what the right thing is. I know that this is the right thing. But I want to know…

Will you marry me?"

He looks back up at her, braced for her amused, disappointed, or angry reaction. This was really one of the few times that he showed so much emotion, so much truth—all for her. But when his eyes shifted to hers, what he didn't expect to see, was Lexie's face looking completely vulnerable—and as he studied her expression, he could swear it looked as if her eyes were filled with tears. No way, Mark thinks, unable to believe that a few simple phrases would have this effect on her. He didn't think that she'd…Well, he never really thought that she'd take him that seriously. He knew he should think better of himself, but a lifetime of reinforcement in just the opposite stopped him. Knowing that she did, though, seemed to make his heart and his self-expectations swell. She doesn't move—doesn't breathe—for a moment as they continue to stare into each other's eyes.

"Lex, I—" Mark begins, only to have her cut him off with a shake of her head. A lone tear falls down her cheek just as she's about to speak.

"I love you," she utters, looking directly at him. "So much."

He smiles at her, bringing his hand forward to catch her tears and cup her face. He looks directly at her when he speaks, his gaze never wavering.

"I love you too, Lexie. More than you know." He inclines his head ever so slowly, his eyes forever locked with hers. When their lips meet, Mark and Lexie knows, without a doubt, that this is their time.

This is their moment. This is the moment they will always remember. This is their truly perfect moment.

"Heaven. Hell. Limbo. No one knows where we're going. Or what's waiting for us when we get there. But one thing we can say, with absolute certainty, is that there are moments…That take us to another place. Moments that take our breath away. Moments of heaven on earth…And maybe, for now, that's all we need to know."—Denny Duquette