A/N: If it was Meredith comforting Alex in 4x17 not Izzie. So basically forget any MerDer after their split in 4x11. Oh and the medical stuff somewhere in the middle might not be completely accurate but there's only so much google can tell me (Y)
This is in the second person, something completely new for me, really hope I've pulled it off.
My first (posted because I'm actually working on an AU for them) Alex/Meredith.
Really really really want reviews for this, would LOVE to know what you think!
Kelly. X.
If you think about it, really think about it, it's always been you and him. Dark and Twistier. Your a bit like a double act, he's Dark, your Twisty. He's always been there for you. You've always been there for him. Because nobody else got you. Not the way you got each other. Crappy childhoods must bring you together -even though you know Izzie wasn't always this bright and shiny and Cristina chose her career path because she watched her father die in front of her- it's that connection, you somehow know how he feels. You've watched him care for Ava -Rebecca- she'll always be Ava to him anyway. And now you're watching him, sat on the edge of his bed, you just know he's crying silent tears.
"I'm sorry" you whisper from the doorway.
"Whatever" he says hoarsely.
You walk into the room and sit on the bed next to him, he doesn't even look at you.
"Not whatever, I'm sorry, about Rebecca, I'm sorry" you say softly, you place your hand on his knee and squeeze it slightly, he looks at you with tear filled eyes -you've never seen him so broken- and he kisses you. It's hard and rough and desperate.
"Alex" you whisper pushing him a little, he grips onto your body, the sobs start "Please" he begs "Just this once, just for this one night, please" you sigh but let his lips touch yours. You know where it's heading. You've had pity sex. With George. Disastrously awkward pity sex but, you know this time it's different. Because this time your both broken.
It happens again almost every night. It's always rough. He leaves bruises on your hips where his thumbs have dug in. You leave scratches across his back and arms. You never scream his name. Except for that one time when his fingers and tongue were working against you and he hit the spot just right and you couldn't help but thank him. Your surprised when Izzie doesn't work it out. But then you do try and make it back to your room by morning. And it's not like you touch each other anywhere else but his bed. Pillow talk doesn't exist between you. But you have admittedly fell asleep in his arms a few times. And you never even spare a thought to the brain surgeon you were sure had your heart -that doesn't mean to say that Alex does.
You don't even realize that you've become attached to him. Until it's been 3 months since it started and your tossing and turning in your bed and you just can't sleep. And he's on call for another 3 hours. You growl at yourself, get out of bed and stomp down the hallway to his bedroom, as soon as you smell that smell, the smell of Alex, you relax. Damn it. You stir when he comes home and climbs into the bed. He pulls you into his body and whispers that it's only him. He doesn't even question you. Damn it. You can't let yourself fall in love with him. You won't. But then as you try and escape the next morning he holds you tight and asks you to stay. You reply that Izzie might see you. He tells you he heard her leave an hour ago. You relax in his arms. And you find yourself thinking who cares if Izzie sees you.
And then it's been 6 months since the pity sex and you can't go on like this anymore. Because it's not pity sex. It's not rough. Not all the time anyway. It's soft, gentle almost, he looks into your eyes as he pushes himself into you, and you smile at each other. You hate to say it but your making love. Dark and Twisty are making love. You find a small laugh escaping your mouth at the thought and he's looking at you with his infamous smirk. And you find yourself asking. What are we doing? "Lying in bed" he replies simply. You knew he would. You rolled your eyes anyway. "No. What are we doing?" you sigh. He just stares at you and you know you probably shouldn't have asked because even though you know it probably has to -if it stays the way it is- you don't want it to end. You stare back at him for a few seconds before telling him to forget you asked and you climb out of the bed throwing on your robe. "Wait" he says as you reach the door, you turn back and look at him "I don't know what we're doing" he replies honestly, you accept the answer with a nod and leave anyway.
It's 2 weeks later when you feel his lips on yours again. And this time you cross the line to on-call room sex. You lose a patient. A kid you'd been working on all week. You don't know why it got you -you'd learnt so much about attachment from the clinical trial- but you find yourself running to an on-call room after telling the devastated parents and you break down. He saw the whole thing and is there within seconds. The door is opened, closed and locked and then your in his arms. And he's kissing you. So softly it breaks your heart just a little bit. You hold him so tightly. You've missed him. You find yourself telling him that. He says it back. And then your kissing again and he's lying you back on the bed and the clothes are shed and it's slow, good slow. And you don't care that it's making love because if your honest it's that that you've missed most. There are plenty of men out there that can give you rough sex but this, the feeling you get from making love, there's nothing like it.
It's 8 months to the day of the pity sex that started it all when the stick turns blue -and the other 3 you took just to check. When you count back the dates in your head it was the on-call room incident that caused it -you find yourself laughing at this because it had to be the one time your broke your own rule. Your hyperventilating in the bathroom when he finds you. He panics. Asks you what's wrong. You point to the sink. He looks in and sees the 4 tests staring up at him. "Oh" he says simply "Ok, it's ok, it's, it's fine" he says sitting you down on the toilet seat "It's fine, just breathe, in and out" he says breathing with you "In and out" your breathing slows down and then your staring at each other, both with utter shock in your eyes. And then he gives you this smile. A smile you've never seen before. And it, it almost looks like, a bright and shiny smile. You look at him in confusion. And then he reaches out and places his hand on your stomach and it clicks. He's happy. He wants this. He wants your crappy babies. "Alex" you whisper "What are we doing?" and this time you really hope he has an answer because you sure as hell don't. "I know your scared. Your thinking about your Mom and god I'm thinking about my Dad but, we're not them, at least I hope I'm not"
"Your not" you say quickly, because you've heard things about Mr Karev and Alex is definitely not him. "Right, we're not so, I think, we can do this, because all a kid really needs is a roof over it's head, food in it's belly and love, and we can give them love" You find yourself smiling at his eagerness. Something you never expected. "But what does this mean for us, what are we?"
"Meredith I, I know this was supposed to be just sex but, you know, you know it's not just sex anymore, it hasn't been just sex in a long time and, I'm pretty sure this kid was not made from just sex"
"We'd have to tell everyone, about us, they're going to be angry"
"Let them" he said softly "We just have to stick together"
"You and me" you nod.
"You and me" he smiles "And the Bug"
"And the Bug" you laugh, you don't know if you should say it, but then he kisses you, and he lifts your shirt a little and kisses your not quite there yet bump and a small tear makes its way from the corner of your eye and you can't stop yourself from blurting I love you. He stops. He looks up at you. Your hearts beating that fast you think it's going to burst through your chest. And then that smiles back. The bright and shiny smile. And he kisses you. And he tells you he loves you too. And then he picks you up. You squeal a little. He takes the pregnancy tests and carries you into your room. You've never done it in your room before, it's always been his. And you make up for that by doing it twice. Ok three times. And you fall asleep with him spooning your body, his hand on your stomach.
It's a month and a half later when it's time to let the cat out of the bag. You're pretty much past the morning sickness stage, you don't know how you didn't get caught throwing up your breakfast. You went to Mercy West for your first ultrasound. And you swear you see tears in his eyes as the doctor points to the heartbeat. You feel sick as you sit Cristina, George and Izzie down at the kitchen table. His hand is on your back rubbing it softly. They all look at you expectantly. "So…." Cristina started. You take a deep breath and put the ultrasound picture on the table. They stare at it. Then they stare at you. And then the picture again. Izzie pulls it closer to herself and you see her read your name off the top -although you know they're not stupid, you know they know it's yours- she whispers 12 weeks and you reply a quiet yes. They look back up at you and that's when it really starts. Because they see the way Alex's arm is around your back. The close distance between you -you probably couldn't even call it distance. Your hand on the swell of your stomach, his hand on top of it. You bite your lip nervously. "Uh, congratulations?" George says with confusion, Izzie and Cristina shoot him glares and he sinks a little in his chair.
"We're happy" you smile.
"We're not" Cristina says coldly.
"What is this?" asked Izzie, you sigh, you can feel Alex tense up beside you and you know he wants to start shouting, he wants to protect you, because they're not really looking at him they're looking at you.
"It was just sex, at first, it was just, sex" you stutter "That's why, that's why we didn't tell you"
"And when was this? How long have you been keeping this from us?!" Izzie exclaimed.
"Almost 10 months" you say biting your lip again "But it's only been about more than sex for about 3 months, well, that's how long we've been admitting it's about more than sex" Cristina just looks at you like your the devil, you know this is hurting her, she's supposed to be your person and you kept a life-changing secret from her. You never kept secrets from her. Not one's this big anyway. She's out of the room before you can say anything else. You jump when the front door slams behind her. "You should have told us" Izzie said coldly getting up and storming off to her room, you both look at George who has been sat there through it all, not saying anything. Probably at the fear of getting beat up by Cristina. "Your happy?" he asks. "We're happy" you smile. "Then congratulations" he smiled back "They'll come around, they're just being stubborn" you let out a tired laugh "You do get that your godfather right?" you say with a small smile "Seriously?!" he exclaims with wide-eyes "We could change our mind" Alex smirked, you elbow him "No, no I'd, I'd be honored" George grins "Your going to be great at this, I mean that" you rub you hand across your stomach and let out a breath "Thank you George" you smile. He's gone within 10 minutes and then Alex has you in his arms. He knows your feeling hurt. But he doesn't need to say anything. Plus your hormones have been all over the place and he's already been on the wrong side of one of your angry outbursts. So that was 3 down. The most important 3. And there was just the whole hospital to go.
The Chief and Bailey are next on the list. They're shocked. You didn't expect anything less. You both suppress a laugh at the sight of speechless Bailey. You're about to become 2nd year residents and in all that time you'd never seen her speechless. Full support is offered. You know it's going to be tough. But you make him promise you that you won't be your mother. That you'll get the time at home. Both of you. You don't tell anyone else. Not unless they ask. Your on the rumor mill as soon as you walk into the hospital anyway. Because he's holding your hand and you greet each other with kisses. And your almost on his lap in the cafeteria. Your being that couple. The type of couple that used to make you both barf. Cristina and Izzie sit on an entirely different table to you and that's never happened in all the time you've known them. He sees the hurt on your face and tells you they'll come around. You have to believe him. You both let out a laugh when you pull away from kiss number -lost count at 4- and see the brain man and the plastics god watching you with shock -the brain man- and curiosity -the plastics god- you just flash them a smile and kiss again. You only last an hour before the whole hospital knows that you're with child. Because Alex sees you in a struggle with an angsty patient in the ER and yells at you that you should have got someone else in your condition. You feel everyone's eyes burn into you, and then the talk starts. And your furious with him. Not because everyone knows, you wanted everyone to know, but now you're officially mommy-tracked. And you know it's going to drive you mad.
The brain surgeon doesn't look your way for weeks. Not unless he has too. And then your 5 months and the bump is definitely there. And Izzie's forgiven you -you swear it's because you've given her your credit card to transform Alex's room into the nursery- and things with Cristina are almost back to normal. And you get a little faint -ok a lot faint- as you scrub out with the brain man and he catches you just before you hit the floor. Your fine. The baby's fine. But you know you should probably slow down. You stick to 12 hour shifts from then on. Your lying in a hospital bed when you come around, an oxygen mask on your face, you pull it off with a groan. And then Alex is at your side kissing your face. "Alex get off I'm fine" you say swatting him out of the way "Wait, is the baby ok?" you finally panic "The baby is perfect" he says softly "You were a little dehydrated that's all" you sigh, you curse yourself for being so careless "But the baby's good?" you ask again "The baby's great" he smiles, he kisses you softly and places his hand on your bump. You look up as the door opens and he's there. The brain man. You send him a small smile and gesture for him to come in. He approaches you nervously "I uh, I just wanted to see if you were uh, ok" he stuttered "I'm good" you smile "Thanks for catching me" you laugh, so does he "That's ok" he smiles "And the baby? Everythings ok?" your lips curl into a grin "The baby's great" you swear you see him sigh in relief "Good, that's good, uh, good, um, I, I know I've been, an ass, and, I'm sorry, you've moved on, and I guess, I guess I didn't expect you to move on which I know sounds ridiculous but, I'm happy for you, both of you, you're going to be great parents" you can't help but smile at his nervous tone, you know he's probably been building up the courage to say that for weeks, it's Alex who replies "Thanks Shepard, that means a lot, coming from you" you smile at him softly "Just don't let them go" Derek sighed "I won't" Alex smiled. And then it's just you and Alex and the Bug.
By the time your 7 months you really should be on maternity leave but you get bored in the house on your own and you beg Bailey and the Chief to let you help run labs and do charts. Tasks you hated as an intern but needed as a bored hormonal resident. So you hang around for the majority of the day, grabbing every spare second Alex had to spend time together. And then he's in a panic because Addison's coming back for another case of quintuplets -you actually laugh at this because how can one city get two cases of quintuplets so close together, but then you remind yourself that it's actually been 3 years and that makes you feel old- and he's in charge of organizing the case until she gets there. All you can do is support him. And you laugh when Addison finally arrives and her eyes almost pop out of her head when she sees your pregnant belly heading straight for her.
"Dr Grey, Meredith, uh, hello" she stutters, you know she thinks it's Derek's "Hey" you smile "I uh" she stutters again "7 months, a boy, we call him Bug, for now" you smile, you can't help but remember Alex's face the day the doctor said the words -it's a boy- "Congratulations" she choked out, you feel a little mean for leading her on but you don't have to say anything more because Alex is by your side "Dr Montgomery" he smiled "Dr Karev" she nodded "Patient files" he says handing the folder over "Uh, thank you" she stutters again, Alex turns to you "Go home, feet up, eat, grow my child, I love you" he kisses you softly, and now you really think her head is going to explode "No, you're not seeing this wrong" you laugh "Just over a year" he supplies because he knows she's thinking how long has this been going on "Right well uh, congratulations" and there's finally a smile on her face "Thank you Addison" you say softly "Mer, home, now" Alex says firmly "Going, going" you mutter "But I'll be back, call me, we love you" you say giving him one last kiss, you smile at Addison and then your gone.
Luckily your at the hospital when your water breaks a week later. Luckily Addison is still there. You have a feeling Alex wouldn't let anyone else touch you anyway, you're sure you heard him asking her to come back for the birth. Your hysterical. It's too early. You know babies have a high chance of survival at 28 weeks but it's too early. Alex is amazing. You know he's going crazy inside but he rubs your back and kisses your temple, he brushes the sweat from your forehead. Your in surgery within the hour and he holds your hand the entire time, the baby's whisked off within a second of him being removed from your body. A resident is closing you up as Addison works on your son. She's gone from the room before you even have the chance to breathe. She comes in to see you both half an hour later "How is he?" you ask quickly.
"He has IRDS" Addison says softly "Infant…"
"Respiratory Distress Syndrome" Alex finishes quietly "How bad is it?"
"I've had to insert a breathing tube but other than that he's strong, I'm not saying we're out of the woods yet but there's hope"
You couldn't help but break down into sobs. Alex was holding you within seconds "Hey, hey it's ok, it's ok Mer, we can do this, he's our little fighter, he can do this" he whispered softly.
"Meredith" Addison said softly placing a hand on yours "I'm going to do everything I can, you know the risks, the percentages and you've seen me get babies younger than this through it, now you need to be strong, you can see him whenever you want"
"Now" you answer quickly "I'll go and get a wheelchair and we'll take you in" Addison says squeezing your hand. You hang your head low as Alex wheels you to the NICU, you don't want to see the pity in everyones eyes. When you enter the room you hear the familiar sounds of machines beeping, Addison steps over to one of the incubators, Alex follows and parks you right in front of it. You gasp and the sight in front of you. He's so tiny. Frail looking. The small breathing tube coming out of his mouth. It's nothing you haven't seen before but it's different. This is your son. Your world. Addison opens the small hole and tells you you can touch him, you reach out and hook your finger under his tiny ones, Alex rests his hand on your shoulder and squeezes it softly. Addison leaves the room for a moment to leave you together. "Why us?" you whisper "It's just life" he said softly "He needs a name" you suddenly realize why your -not sister- sister found it hard to name her daughter. You just stare at the tiny fingers "Mer? He needs a name" Alex said softly "I'm thinking" you say quietly "I, I didn't think about it, I was waiting" you whimper, he wraps his arms around you and kisses you softly "Harry" you say quietly a few minutes later "Harry Alexander Karev" he looks and you and smiles, you think he's remembering the day he said you should just name him Alex Junior and be done with it, you hit him that day and called him an idiot "I love it" he smiled "Hey Harry" he said softly, reaching his arm in and touching his son for the first time "You have to get better for me and Mommy ok? We love you very much, I love your Mommy very much and I don't like it when she's sad, so you have to get better so you can give Mommy a cuddle" even though it's not how you imagined it you smile at Alex talking to your son for the first time, you remove your hand from the incubator and grab his chart, you scrawl his name across the top making it official. And then it's just a waiting game.
It takes 2 days for the breathing tube to be removed. Addison's amazed at how quickly he begins to recover. You tell her to go home, he's getting better and the residents can handle it now. She tells you to stop being ridiculous, that she's staying until Harry leaves the hospital in your arms. You say thank you. You guess you should count yourself lucky that she was there. You're pretty sure the Chief would have called her out anyway. And Alex. And Bailey. And Izzie. And George. And Cristina even though she'd feel really awkward. And probably even Derek would have given it a shot. He's stopped by a few times to check on you both. It's another 2 days before you can hold him for the first time, your scared you're going to break him. But it's the best feeling in the world. And Alex is there snapping pictures of you. You kind of hate it because you've been wearing the same clothes since you were discharged and your hair could really use a wash but you know it's not a moment you want to forget. It's another 5 days before he's in the clear. You cry when Addison tells you it's time to take him home. And as you stand there with him in your arms you finally feel complete. You know for sure that Alex is crying this time. He just tells you to shut up and kiss him. You stand at the nurses station signing the discharge papers when everyone approaches you -everyone being Addison, Cristina, Izzie, George, Bailey, Callie, Mark, Derek and the Chief- and they all wish you well, you look up at Alex and he nods "Actually, we just uh, wanted to tell you who the godparents are" you stutter "Well, Izzie and George, you've already agreed to it so, no backing out now" Alex laughed "And we thought maybe, Chief you could be the other godfather" you think you see tears in the Chiefs eyes, he chokes out an "I'd be honored" and you both know it's a silent thank you to him for putting up with any coldness you may have shown towards him over the years "And uh, Addison, we want you to be godmother" you say softly "Wha...what?" she stuttered "Me? But, surely it's, Cristina I mean, she's your best friend" you can't help but laugh, you knew she'd react like this "Cristina pulled herself out of the running pretty much straight away" said Alex "Says we really wouldn't want to leave our kids with her if we died" Cristina merely nods when everyone looks at her with a smirk "And you, you saved his life" you whisper hoarsely trying to hold back more tears "And don't you dare say you were just doing your job, you saved his life and, I can't, we can't thank you enough so, well, you don't really get a choice" you both look at her hopefully "If it's what you want then, I'd love too" she said quietly, you just grin at her and nod. And then it's just you, Alex and Harry. Lying on your bed, Harry lying in your arms. And everything feels, perfect.
It's a year later when you find a ring in the back of his bedside table drawer. You were looking for a pacifier -you don't know how you can't find one considering you bought Harry 4- and your hand hit a small box. You take it out and nervously open it. You've never been one for jewelry but it's the most perfect ring you've ever seen. Simple. Elegant. White gold with a shiny diamond. You hear the front door shut and you know it's him. You close the box and put it quickly back in the drawer. You pick Harry up off the bed and walk down the stairs to greet him. You can never get over how lucky you are to have this, the family, it wasn't something you ever expected to have, even through everything with Derek, you never saw that life with him. You didn't see it with Alex either but it felt so right. But all you could think of when Alex kissed you -when he took Harry from your arms and you saw both of their faces light up- was the ring in the back of his drawer. You were never the marrying type. And neither was he. But then to share his name -to be Meredith Karev- actually made your heart do a little flip. So it was a waiting game from then on.
It's your birthday when he finally asks. A month after you found the ring. You've been on edge since then. He doesn't get down on one knee. You wouldn't want him to, that's not you and it's not him either. Your lying in bed in a postcoital bliss. Your lying on top of him with your head against his heart. You feel him move his arm from beneath you. You hear the drawer slide open. You know this is it. He takes the ring and holds it in front of your face. You move on top of him and straddle his body, you hold out your hand expectantly with a grin "You found it didn't you" he smirked "About a month ago" you smirk back, he laughs and slips the ring on your finger, you're still laughing when you lean down and kiss him "When?" you whisper, your forehead against his "Soon" he replies.
And it is soon. It's 3 weeks later and Izzie's actually going crazy at you for going to city hall. You've decided that you are the marrying type your just not the big white wedding type. Addison flies out even though you told her she didn't have too. But she insists and ends up bringing tons of presents for Harry even though it was his birthday not long before and she spoiled him enough then. You tell her off. She calls them impulse buys. You just laugh at her and thank her. She forces you and Alex to have a honeymoon. You make every excuse in the book to say no. You've never left Harry for more than a day. You really can't take any more time off work. She says she cleared it with the Chief and she's happy to stay and look after Harry. You finally give in when Alex whispers something naughty in your ear. Because no matter what your still the dirty girl you once were and he's the dirty guy. It's settled. A week in Vegas. You'll drink. Gamble -but only a little because you really want to make use of your trust fund not throw it down the drain- and have sex. Lots of it. The ceremony is perfect. It's small. The friends you now call your family there as witnesses. And even though Izzie's annoyed at you she's bawling her eyes out when you say I do. And you bawl your eyes out when you say goodbye to Harry at the airport.
When Harry turns 3 you discover your pregnant again. Not long after the wedding Izzie moved in with Cristina when Callie moved in with Arizona so you set to decorating the room you haven't really touched in 2 years. You find out it's a girl and Izzie's back within a shot turning the room into a pink paradise. That was your bedroom once. It was your pink paradise until the age of 5. You hope it will hold better memories for her.
Bethany Leigh Karev is the apple of Alex's eye. You know from the minute he holds her she's going to be a Daddy's girl. And before you know it you've been married for 10 years and you're on a proper family holiday in LA because the kids don't get to see their favourite Aunt Addison enough and somehow Harry twists your arm into driving 7 hours to San Francisco to see the Golden Gate Bridge. He's had an obsession with it ever since they did a geography project on California. And you think why not because you hardly ever get the time to do anything as a family. And then it hits you like a smack in the face. The pity sex. The reason for the last 12 years of your life stopping right in front of you in the street. And you feel it. The tension in his body. The grip on your hand getting tighter with every breath "Alex" she breathes out, you squeeze his hand tightly to make him respond "Rebecca" he chokes out "Uh, how, how are you?" he stutters, you hope the grip he's got on your hand isn't the same as the one on Bethany's, she seems pretty content so you assume not "I'm, I'm good, great" she smiles "Better. How are you?" you know she means who are these people to you, you're not sure if she recognizes you or not "I'm good, great" Alex stutters again "Uh, I, this is…."
"Meredith Grey, I remember" Rebecca nods, at this Harry looks up at her "It's not Meredith Grey dude, it's Meredith Karev!" he exclaims as it's the most obvious thing in the world, all you can do is smile "He's just like you" Rebecca said with a small laugh -you remember the first time the word dude came out of his mouth, he was 4, you didn't know if you should laugh or cry- it feels like Alex is relaxing a little when he sees her smile -he's always felt guilty, like her breakdown was his fault, you think this is it, the day he lets go- "Yeah, he's my little mini-me aren't you Haz" Alex laughed letting go of my hand to ruffle Harry's hair "Daaad!" he whined, "Haaarrryyy" he mocked "It feels like I have 3 kids sometimes" you mutter to Rebecca "Know the feeling" she laughed, Alex looks at her questioningly "I got back with Jeff, after I left the hospital, it's been tough but, we had another kid, a little boy, Jack, he's 3, it's, everythings good now, I have my bad days but, I'm good so, thank you Alex" she smiled "I didn't do anything" he said nervously "You saved me" Rebecca smiled softly. You find out that she moved to San Francisco 5 years ago and you notice the kids getting impatient so you say your goodbyes, properly this time and you make your way back to the hotel.
That night you lie in bed snuggled close into your husbands chest. Husband still feels weird coming of your tongue. And you can't count the amount of times they have to shout Dr Karev before you turn around. But you wouldn't change a thing. You're proud to be Mrs Meredith Karev. To have the 2 mini-Karevs and live in the house that you finally redecorated when Harry was 5 and Bethany was 2. You turn onto your front and rest your chin on your hands on his chest, you lean up and kiss him softly "I love you" you whisper "I love you too" he whispers back kissing you again "You ok?" you ask quietly "I'm perfect Mrs Karev how are you?" he grins -and you know it's really happened this time, you've moved on from the pity sex saga- "I'm perfect Mr Karev" you reply "To another 10 years" he smiles pulling you up a little and kissing you quickly "You sure you want me?" you grin "Always" he says softly "Then I don't want another 10 years, I want a lifetime" you smile.
You'll always be dark and twisty and so will he. You'll always have the memories of your crappy childhoods to contend with. But you'll always have each other and you feel so corny for even thinking that you've got your bright and shiny happily ever after. Because you never believed in happily ever afters. You thought fairytales sucked as a kid. And you actually laugh when you find yourself thinking you're living a fairytale because you know that's not true. There are fights and disagreements. Times when you just want to run and you know he has those times too. But then you see 2 pictures sat on the mantlepiece and you know how you got there, to your fairytale. The first, Baileys 5. Your first outing to Joe's as a group. You're drunk. All of you. Cristina actually has her arm around George who looks completely petrified, Izzie's kissing his cheek, and then you see something you've never really took much notice of before. Your stood next to Cristina holding her hand, you're pretty sure you were dancing just before Joe took the snap, and Alex, Alex is stood behind you, his arms around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder. You must have been really drunk because he was just Dirty Uncle Sal back then and you'd already tried to beat him up once. You laugh, because you look like a couple even then. The second picture, the one that makes your heart flip everytime you see it, your sat in your hospital bed, you look exhausted -you'd just been in labour for 26 hours of course you were exhausted- and Alex is sat on the bed next to you, his arm wrapped around you. Baby Bethany is lying in your arms. 3 year old Harry is sat on Alex's lap. You're all looking up at the camera with the biggest smiles on your faces. And that was the moment. The moment you weren't Dark and Twisty. Or the Dirty Mistress and Evil Spawn. You weren't even -you me and the Bug- you were The Karevs. A family. You weren't so dark and twisty anymore.