Mismatched Memories
"Aragaki. Shinjiro Aragaki!"
Drawn out of the reverie that the boy had been in, he looked towards the adult with a look of utter disgust. "What the shit's your problem, you four-eyed freak?" he spat, vemonous words flowing from between his lips like silk. He didn't have time to waste on these people that called themselves his guardians. They were nothing of the sort.
"Shinji!"
"Aragaki. Come with me at once."
"Tch." Standing with an annoyed exhale of breath, the brunette tugged on the tight cuffs of his solid black shirt. "These damn dress shirts..." Why the hell did they have to have a dress code? Wasn't it bad enough that they were stuck here? He sure as hell wasn't going to stay in these clothes for long.
"Shinji-san!"
Sighing inwardly, he recognized the voice from anywhere. It was his one "friend" in this disease-ridden hell-on-earth homicidal campus: a little silver haired boy with eyes that matched, and mood swings that were a moot point, in his opinion. He turned slightly, looking over his shoulder at Akihiko Sanada.
"What, Aki."
"Why do you do that?"
"Do what."
"Get yourself into trouble!"
"Because there's nothing else to do around here."
"But-"
"Damn Aki, don't be such a pussy. What do you think they're going to do, hit me? I'm a fucking kid, they can't touch me." He crossed his arms, growling slightly as he tried to tug on his shirt-sleeves again. Everything felt so constricting around here. Life was so constricting. He hadn't been in this world for long but it was long enough to see how bastardly it all was.
"But Shinji... What if they try to move you to a different home?"
"You call this a home, Sanada?" Intense irritation flared within him, abruptly. His eyes narrowed at the boy who stared up at him before he turned away. "Hmph. You must be as senile as these old bastards." Anger growing within him, he turned and marched out of the doors to the awaiting caretaker in the hallway.
Akihiko could remember that day. They'd been so young, then. He, so naive, while Shinji hadn't really been much different than how the rest of S.E.E.S knew him. After that particular meeting with his orphanage guardian, Shinji had come back looking more than just a little bit perturbed. And Aki hadn't been able to get a word out of him about what the talk had been about. He still didn't know... to this very day.
"Miki! No, Miki!"
His "best friend"'s screams were not burning out- unlike the building that stood before them.
"Miki!"
Loud voices had always annoyed him, screaming at the top of the list. He wanted to rack the shit out of people who kept screaming when there wasn't a point to. But, over the snaps, cracks, and pops that were issuing from the burning orphanage that he had recently been inhabiting, he couldn't find it in him to be irritated. For once in his life, Shinjiro felt nothing but remorse.
"Miki! Miki...! Mik...i..."
From the corner of his eye, he watched Akihiko drop to his knees, burying his face into his hands. There had been few times since they'd hit age six that he had seen the silver-haired one cry. This was one of them, and it hurt like hell. He wasn't sure why.
It had been some kind of freak accident, as they'd told them, that caused the orphanage to catch fire. They'd gotten out who they could: Aki and himself had been with the refugees and Miki had not. The blood bond between the two was becoming severed, if not already, as the building burned with people in it. Aki had tried to fight, to go save his sister... But, his efforts had proved futile as he was now crumpled on the cement, shoulders shaking with sobs.
Shinjiro slouched against the fence, looking up towards the moon. The abnormal glow of the fire burning next to them lit up the sky, ashes floating down around them. He coughed slightly, feeling it rasp all the way along his throat. He'd been subjected to enough smoke inhalation to burn the fuck out of his throat, but he was refusing treatment. He didn't need anyone's damned-to-hell pity. And neither did Aki, which was the main reason that he was not moving away from that fence. He wasn't going to comfort his crying friend. A man has very rare occassions in which to cry over, and in those moments, he doesn't need another man fussing over him. Not that Shinji was one to fuss.
It still hurt... When Akihiro thought of how badly he'd failed his sister that day. There had been months... years later that he suddenly found himself in a depression that seemed to last no longer than a day or so. But, when it hit, it hit. He'd locked himself in his room and refused to come out. Akihiko knew the feeling of failing his friends all too well. He had never wanted to become familiar with that particular feeling he'd felt as he watched the building burn. But... Slowly... He was.
"Damn it! Damn it, damn it, damn it...!"
"What in the hell, that's the most I've heard you say that phrase all your life."
"Shut up, Shinji..."
"Hmph. What's wrong now."
"I just... I don't..." With a sigh even audible to Shinjiro, across the room, Akihiko flopped onto the bed. Another orphanage. Shinjiro had snuck out of his past curfew and Aki had already had his door unlocked. He wouldn't break impassiveness for it, but Shinji found it almost funny how he was turning Akihiko into a delinquent.
"Useful."
"I can't believe we're still here." Glancing up, he watched Aki drop onto his back, sprawling out. The boy was staring at the ceiling unhappily, hands curled into fists. "Sometimes I just wish we could run. Not run away from everything, because then I'd be disappointing Miki. But, just to get away from here. I want to live my own life. I don't want to live the way they tell me anymore."
"Let's go."
"Huh?" Now Sanada-san was staring at him.
He shrugged. "If you don't like it, leave. There's nothing keeping you here."
"Yes, there is..."
"What." Only silence met his ears and he smiled disdainfully. "I told you so, you stupid brat."
"Don't call me a brat!" Akihiko's voice snapped and in the next moment, Shinjiro found himself sprawled out against the floor. He had absolutely no idea of how he had gotten there, but Aki, standing over him with a livid expression, seemed to be the answer.
It was the first time anyone had ever stood up to Shinjiro. And he realized, tasting blood in his mouth, he absolutely loathed it. Fury pulsed through his veins, seeming to burst straight through his skin before he slammed his body into Aki's smaller one. They were almost even now- height and weight wise, but he was able to get the boy down and deliver a few solid blows to his face.
They must have both been kicking and screaming and swearing, although it was all a red blur to him, because soon they were being pulled apart by two guardians. He was still spitting curses and aiming blows for the other, but neither seemed to hit their mark. Snarling, he jerked himself free from constricting hands and, with a look full of pure hatred towards Akihiko, stalked out of the room.
They'd had their fights. There had been so many times where Akihiko had pissed him off. It was in those times, before the dorm, that Aki could feel himself slipping again. When the looming threat of no friends claimed him. No family, no friends, nothing. That's what he was. He was a nobody. Thinking those thoughts had only made him more angry... Why him? Why had it been destined for him to be carted from orphanage to orphanage? Why did Miki have to die? Why was this all being pinned on him? And the more he thought, the more angry he got with everyone...
"Fuckin' shit, Aki, what you got in those things?"
"My hands."
Shinjiro forced himself not to slide backwards as Aki's boxing gloves pounded into his hands for another uncountable hit. Somehow, Aki had managed to get himself a pair of worn-down gloves, and since that day, he hadn't let them go. He'd been beating the shit out of whatever he could, Shinjiro included. Of course, Shinji only agreed to be his punching bag if he could, in turn, deliver blows right back. He was effectively teaching Aki to dodge, because his punches hurt a whole hell of a lot more.
That wasn't to say that Aki wasn't getting better with boxing... Or whatever he wanted to call it. Shinji's own hands were starting to sting from the repeated rhythms being pounded into the skin, although he wouldn't admit it. He just reeled back and slammed his fist towards Aki, much surprised to hit flesh. A loud thump issued seconds later and he knew they both froze. They'd been getting caught, and threatened, as of late. These late night excursions to each-other's rooms... The administrators had gone as far as talking on transferring one or the other. He'd say fuck rules on a good day, but he wasn't about to lose Aki now. Fuck that shit, he had his own agenda... That, sadly, involved not getting caught for once.
"Damn Aki, what the hell are you thinking?" he hissed, rounding on the clear-eyed one, whom was sitting on the floor, rubbing irritably as his cheek.
"Ngh... Don't lecture me after you just fuckin' sucker-punched me like that!"
He backed down, crossing his arms. He knew when to quit; Aki only swore if he was really pissed. "This was your fucking idea in the first place, dumbass," was his only response.
There were a few silent moments that he stayed slouched against the wall, arms crossed, tendrils of deep brown hair snaking into his face. He didn't like it when Aki got pissy with him; it made him want to get pissy back. And their pissed-off-at-each-other fights were what was causing talk of transfer.
"I'll take you up on that offer."
"What." He flicked his russet gaze to the other human in the room.
"Before, you said... Well, I said I didn't like it here and you told me to leave. So, let's go. I wanna go. With you."
Blinking slowly, Shinji smirked and uncrossed his arms. "Right now?" Breaking out of campus was just the thing that he'd been looking for in his fights with Akihiko- amusement and adreneline rushes. Something to cause trouble.
"Yea."
"Fine by me. Ain't no use hanging around this labyrinth full of stupid kids and bitching adults."
That was the night that they decided to run away together. Little did they know, it was going change their lives forever.
The night that they had awakened their Personas... That had been the night that they had run away from the orphanage. What they'd found had scared the living daylights out of them both. He remembered that he'd clearly had a full scale panic attack that embarrassed him even now, and Shinjiro had been abnormally quiet. That had been how Shinji took things, quietly, even when he was scared. But then... Miracle of all miracles, he'd found a home. As simple as that. But something always had to happen...
"Shinji...?"
"Get lost."
"What are you doing here? Come back home."
"That place ain't my home!" Shinjiro snapped, curling his fingers reflexively around the Evoker's handle at his waist. "Just get the fuck out of here, Aki!"
"Shinji... It's not the same without you. Mitsuru and I, we-"
"I said, get lost. Before I make you." Akihiko didn't even flinch from his threats.
He felt strained, stripped to the bone. Ever since finding his ability, this curse, life had gotten worse all over again. Aki had improved; Shinjiro watched him growing stronger everyday he spent time pounding the punching bag in his dorm room. But he had only felt himself growing more distant. He didn't belong in a place like that and he didn't deserve the power. A power he couldn't control.
"Hey, it's not your fault!"
"Drop it."
"No one could have known, our Personas are still unstable and yours-"
"I'm a fucking freak show. I know, Aki."
"That's not what I said."
"Whatever."
A silent moment had him on edge, even more than before. He could feel himself trembling and it was harder not to press the Evoker to his head. He just wanted Aki to get the hell out of here and leave him alone, rather than stare evenly at him with one of those looks.
Although, had he started a Persona battle between the two, it would be evenly matched. Polydeuces and Castor were Gemini, after all. Shinji might not be educated, but he was fairly familiar with Greek mythology.
Footsteps had them both looking up. Shinjiro wrapped his pea coat around him tighter, hiding his real-looking but faux pas gun. Although... who the hell was he kidding? It was past midnight. It was the Dark Hour. Who'd be walking around if they weren't associated with it somehow. He reversed his actions, grabbing the Evoker and holding it tightly in his hand. If he was lucky, he'd get to beat the shit out of someone. If these bastards came to fuck with him, they wouldn't be fucking with anyone after tonight.
Three people walked into view around the corner; two men and one woman. He was instantly narrowing his eyes at their looks: one was free of a shirt and covered with weird-looking tattoos, another dressed in green with a metal suitcase in hand, the last with bright red hair and some kind of strange-ass head decoration.
"Good evening."
He could feel Akihiko tense at his side, their shoulders just brushing as they stood on the steps of the back entrance of the building. He took a small step away and responded in the only way he knew how. "What are you supposed to be? The three misfits of Port Island Station? Some fucked up body-builder, a leprechaun, and a dumbass girl who looks like she's four?" He snorted. "Nice get-ups, douches."
"Leprechaun? I'll have you know-"
"Jin." The blonde-haired one shared a silent look with the other male, and then looked back to Shinjiro. "We've come to talk to you, in private."
"Like hell." Ahihiko spoke to his left and he glanced towards the other Persona-user, narrowing his eyes.
"I'll fight my own battles, Aki. Get lost."
"No way in hell."
"I'm afraid we have no choice, Jin. Eradicate the nuisance."
Eradicate the- "Holy shit... An Evoker." He hadn't expected to see the leprechaun, Jin?, pull out an Evoker. And the summoning of the Persona was just as a shock.
"Moros!"
That name... sounded like death, in a way.
He fumbled to summon Castor, but hadn't needed to in the first place. The attack wasn't directed at him. Moments later, Aki was layed flat out on his back, panting for breath. Shinji didn't move.
"Get out of here, now."
"I... will not..." came the muttered reply as Aki forced himself to his feet, stumbling into the railing after. "Ngh..."
"Aki! Get out!" he snapped, grabbing a fistful of the red vest he'd come to know so well. Then he threw him off the stairs, only irritation filling his features as the man stumbled and nearly fell again. Of course no one would see how he was panicking on the inside. These guys were bad news.
"I will... not..." Akihiko coughed, bringing up blood in his snowy-white palm.
"Go on! I'm done with you, Aki! You don't need to hang around me! I don't need you! I'm done with S.E.E.S. I'm done with you. Now, get out."
"Don't say-"
"Now. Or I'll personally have Castor help you out. One way or another."
He met the hurt look on his friend's face with impassiveness on his own. He knew Aki wouldn't walk away on a fight if there was something to fight for. Shinji didn't plan on needing someone to fight for him. So, he had to get rid of Aki in the one way he knew how.
That was the last time that Akihiko had saw Shinjiro as a member of S.E.E.S. As a friend. They'd met again... they'd talked, but it wasn't on the same level that it had been before. After some time, Aki couldn't recall the reason this had happened. He knew Shinjiro owed him apology, but he couldn't remember why. He'd known waiting on an apology was like waiting for a cure to Persona, but... they'd never gotten close after that night. Until the day Aki was forced to take action.
He just walked out of Hagakure, slipping his hands into his pockets tiredly. Even the taste of the ramen hadn't been enough to dilute the taste of bile from the morning he'd spent throwing up. Those pills... They were nothing but trouble but required nonetheless. In the middle of it all, he was surprised- and annoyed- to find Akihiko and the blue-haired kid standing outside, waiting on him.
"You're getting on my nerves," he growled, turning his head away. Damn Aki, why can't you leave me alone?
"The situation has changed. Sorry, but this time, I'm not asking."
"What?"
"This belongs to you." He took a step back as Akihiko shoved the suitcase into his face. Narrowing his eyes and opening his mouth to answer, he was cut off. "We have a new enemy. They're Persona-users, like us." Wait... Persona-users. He only knew of three others... But Aki should have known them as well. Maybe they'd been too young, or Aki had blocked that particular memory. Tch.
"Yeah, so what?" He brushed past his old friend, heading towards the stairs. I don't have time for this shit. He could quickly another side-effect brush of the pills coming on, and he needed out.
"There's more. Ken Amada has joined our team."
What? "What the hell are you talking about!" Why was... Damn.
"He has the potential, and Ikutsuki-san has okayed it. He's now a Persona-user."
"You've... gotta be kidding me," he muttered, turning away again. That kid... He owed that kid. Damn it if that didn't mean joining S.E.E.S again. "Let me ask you one thing... Was it his decision to join S.E.E.S?"
Aki turned around, meeting his gaze. He knew exactly how to get him back into the group. Shinji could have punched him. "Yeah. He volunteered."
Great. This was just a load of bullshit that he was getting caught up in again. He didn't want to rejoin that damned group. Personas had ruined his life. "... I see," he sighed, rubbing his eyes. "Then, count me in."
Ready to change the subject from the Amada family, he turned to the other student he'd heard again. Minato something. "So, you're the one leading the operations now, huh?" Narrowing his eyes, he took in the boy. Scrawny little slouched shit. "If you don't mind me asking, what exactly are you fighting for?"
"To protect someone." His answer came back without a second's hesitation as the blue eyes stared back at him ceaselessly. Well, maybe he wasn't such a bad leader. Shinji doubted that he was very good, though.
"Is that so? Well, you do your thing; I'll do mine." In other words, stay the hell out of my way. Huffing under his breath, he turned back to Aki, jerking the suitcase from the pale hand when it was offered. "Is my room still vacant?" Akihiko nodded. Damn right, his room better still be vacant. Without another word, he turned and took off. There wasn't much longer he could fight on this oncoming attack, metaphorically and figuratively.
Had Akihiko known that making him join S.E.E.S again would have ended the way it did, he would have never gave him his Evoker back.
"It's been five months now, Shinji." Akihiko was sprawled out in the grass on that chilly March night. The thin leather jacket did little to protect him from the outgoing-winter's cold, but he didn't mind. "Five months..."
The silver-haired man fell into a silence. He didn't know why. It wasn't as if he was going to receive a response.
He stretched his arms out, letting his fingers brush against the cold rock close to his head, moving up, before settling in the indent that was the letter i in Aragaki. He was in the cemetery, laying next to Shinji's tombstone. The cold breeze was nipping at his nose and chaffing his fingers, but he couldn't bring himself to move. There was too much to be said right now.
"Everybody's leaving. Well, me and Mitsuru are moving out of the dorms to go to college. Or Mitsuru's gonna do something with the company. We don't really talk much anymore. I think he was close with her. Our friendship became strained towards the end of our battles..." he trailed off, quietly speculating. "Yukari's doing a lot at cram school. Her future looks bright. She's changed a lot, too. Something about Nyx and his death, and she doesn't want anything to do with us now. I guess I can understand."
His eyes moved towards the sky once again, eyes searching out for two particular stars in general.
"I remember you told me that story about Polydeuces and Castor one day. I had never been into mythology before that... I don't believe in all that crap. But, it was kind of interesting... I mean, they were our Personas. In the story, Polydeuces was granted immortality and Castor was killed. Isn't that kinda ironic, Shinji? You went out like Greek mythology. What were you, an avid follower of the stuff?" He laughed lightly, letting his hands drop onto the grass that was still growing over the grave.
His eyes found the stars: the two brightest stars in the Gemini constellation. Pollux (for Polydeuces) and Castor, burning brightly into the night. He'd never been into that constellation stuff either, except for this one Zodiac name. Not to say that he hadn't done a little background information search on the others Personas, but...
"Ken's going back to live with his grandmother. You know, the kid really admires you. Which is something, because you're not one to be admired," he joked, laughing quietly to himself. "I think he's taking Koro-chan with him, either that, or the dog's gonna go back to the shrine. Mitsuru told me Aigis is going to go back to the lab. Hm, I don't know what Junpei plans to do. Pretty sure that Fuuka's gonna go back to her parents' house. But I'm sure you really don't care."
Akihiko trailed off again, pushing himself to sit up. "I've lost three of the people closest to me... How is Miki? And Minato... It hasn't been that long, but I'm sure he's caught up with you. He's probably happy it happened this way. Kid's a martyr, just like you. No wonder you got along so well... after that initial first week or so. Anyway... I'll be going off to college, so I won't be around here much. I'll miss the plac-"
He fell over from a sudden jolt, not a physical force, but something that seemed to radiate in his head. "What in the hell...?" He looked up, immediately suspecting the Dark Hour, but the moon was as white as ever. Frowning, he pulled out his cell phone. 12:00 A.M. March 31st. Strange... it was midnight again.
Wait. March 31st! That was yesterday...
"What is happening here...?" No sooner had the question left his lips did his cell phone light up with an uncoming call from Mitsuru. He hadn't been the only one to feel the jolt and notice the time, it seemed.
"Well, Shinji, looks like it's just begun," he muttered, and with that, unbeknowestly tied himself into a new adventure.
AN: Well, this is my first Persona fanfiction. I just finished P3F last night, so I probably smeared the time lines of how old they were when certain things happened (aka: Miki's death and Persona-awakening) or messed up the past. Like I said, I haven't played The Answer past the first boss battle in the first door, so I haven't gotten to Aki's past. This is a hit on the ShinjAki pairing, only subtle moments. Again, if my information is incorrect with the game's, bear with it, and enjoy it for how I wrote it. Thanks~
