Disclaimer: I do not in any way own or take credit for Inuyasha. Rumiko Takahashi gets all credit, as she should.

Inuyasha is pondering about his and Kagomes fights. Not quite Inuyashas way of expressing himself, but... here goes.

Kagome...

I can't say I'm fighting with you; we both know you'll seemingly win the argument...
...but we'll both feel like losers. So it's not like we're fighting, really.
In a REAL fight one can WIN.

All that happens in the end of our fights is that we both end up hurt, separated from one another when we need each other the most. When we need to share how bad we're hurting because of one another.

So why do you keep insist it's my fault? Am I not as hurt as you afterwards? Am I not as pained, not as unhappy and unsatistfied? Am I not the one to constantly ask for forgiveness?

...keh, in truth, I guess I'm the one who messes up mostly, too...

But you cry. That's a wicked trick.

When you cry, I could do anything to make you stop. To make you smile again.
Tears are a sign something's broken. If not skin, then something within... the heart, the soul, the mind.

The trust.

I fear everytime you cry that this'll be the time I've seveared your trust in me.
That this'll be the time when you no longer will let me touch you, carry you. That you'll no longer let me protect you.

That this time, you'll leave and stay away.

That's why I always mess up and start to yell instead of comforting you. I want to make you smile, but fear always gets the better of me and I end up yelling.

Stupid wench. Just don't cry, will you?
How hard can it be.

That's what I'm saying. But what I mean is; don't break inside, Kagome.
Be tougher! Be able to take my blows. Be strong enough for me not to hurt you.
Be strong so you can trust me forever. Be strong so you'll stay with me.

Don't leave me.
I need you to keep us together, because I sure as hell can't.

I won't say that, though...

Guess that's another reason we're not really fighting. A fight is about something specific, something both fighters can understand. I want your land...I want your wife...I want you dead. Stuff like that. We...you and I... are very good in not voicing why our emotions rage inside, so we take the small things and blow them out of porpotion completely and are both over all really stupid.

S'like me attacking Shippo with Kaze no Kizu. It can be done but it's really not motivated. A wack on the head is more than sufficiant...or maybe two.

Anyhow. I really wish we could stop with this fake fighting now. Even if we're not ready to face the real issues here, I don't want to spend yet another night worrying about whether you'll forgive me or not. I don't want you to cry or risk your trust in me over stupid little nothings.

I want our next fight to be a real fight, one about something specific and where one of us has a fair chance to win. I want it to be about what we want for real and not just raging emotions channeled through nothingness.

That's what I tell myself during these long nights when we're so far away from each other. In bright daylight I chicken out again. These small fights are tearing both us and me apart, but we've always mended the rift. If we fight about something serious, would we really be able to patch it up?

Keh, I'm thinking too much...