Hey guys! this is just a one-shot I wanted to try out. It's not the best, but i think it's definitely unique because people always want to read about Natsume's feelings for Mikan form his point of view. I twisted that up in this. Now it's Mikan showing how deep her feelings really are for Natsume. Enjoy!(:

Diclaimer: I do not own Gakuen Alice.


"Are you ready?"

I looked over my shoulder to where Hotaru was calling over to me. Her black dress cascaded in the wind as the sunlight pounded on its color. She had her matching-black hat in her hands.

"They're waiting for us in the car."

I turned away from her, back to my original view. "Yeah, hold on."

My gaze lingered down upon the ground in front of me, where a silver, concrete plate laid ever so serenely in the midst of the bright, turtle grass. There were many flowers surrounding the plate, all mostly having the darkish- red hue of a burning fire. They perimetered all the sides, seeming as if the weak petals would protect this name from whatever may come to harm it. Easily, I recognized Ruka-pyon's. Then Hotaru's, Sumire's, and Tsubasa-senpai's. They gave the brightest flowers of all.

But in my hand was not a pretty plant to offer. It was an envelope.

"Two years," I whispered, gently dropping on my knees before the plate. "Two years, Natsume."

The name was carved into the silver, creating shadows that boldly read Natsume Hyuuga. There was no parting message to add, nor was there a born-died date. There shouldn't be any of that, since nobody I knew of called Natsume had died.

"Here. I wanted to be unique," I said, smiling as I put the cream-colored envelope just under his name, where it would be hard to miss. "It might be too much though."

A shadow fell upon the plate the next second, grazing my shoulder as it did so. I sighed and closed my eyes. "Hotaru."

"Do you want to put a rock on that or something? It's windy out today."

I took one last glance at the perfect, silver square that stood out despite being buried under the swaying grass. The flowers were all beginning to be whisked away by the wind slowly, and I noticed my letter was as well starting to ride.

I stood on my feet.

"It's okay. He'll come get it soon. And once he reads it, he'll realize what an idiot he's being and he'll come back to me."


Dear Natsume,

Hello! It's been a while, hasn't it? It's crazy that almost 2 years have passed since you've moved to America. I can still remember the day when I saw you off at the airport. To be honest, I'm still mad at you for taking my necklace. You could've just asked for it, you know? No need to suddenly yank it off my neck. I hope by now you've found a way to fix the chain - that you broke - because if you return without it in perfect condition, I'm going to throw it away. Remember, that's the first birthday present you gave me, so it's wasting both your money and my precious, precious memory.

(By the way, my uncle, Shiki-san, Narumi-sensei, and Tsubasa-senpai all want to have a talk with you. Geez, they're can be so much sometimes. But it's partly your fault for kissing me out of the blue like that. In public, too! At the airport!...We could've hid behind a pillar or something, you idiot.)

Everyone back here is doing well. I guess by now you've heard that Hotaru and Ruka-pyon are a "thing". That's what everyone is saying since they're too scared to actually say "couple". I accidentally said the word to her when I asked about Ruka-pyon, and she shot me with her Baka gun. In the face. Six times. At full power. So don't be surprised to see me with a face you can't recognize. I'll say hi first.

Oh, and surprise, surprise - Misaki-senpai and Tsubasa-senpai have begun going out, as well. Actually, it's not have begun, but have been for the last seven months. I wish you were here to see the moment Tsubasa-senpai finally admitted he loves her - everyone else was. We watched from behind a bush when he told her. I swear it was the sweetest thing ever. He was blushing like crazy. I wanted to laugh so bad, but thankfully Koko shut my mouth for me so they didn't find us snooping in the end.

He said, "Misaki! I love you, so go out with me!"

You think she'd reject him because he sounded like her was forcing her too, but Misaki-senpai just smiled. And smiled. And smiled. And in the third second after hearing the confession, she slapped him to the ground.

"I'd be happy to if you ask me nicely," she said.

It took 21 tries, but Tsubasa-senpai pulled through. They're happy now, and sometimes I see the look in Tsubasa-senpai's eyes that say will you marry me?

I swear, sweetest thing ever.

But hey, let's beat them, okay? We beat them before, so let's beat them now when it really counts. Let's get married before them.

Haha, just kidding.

Okay, enough about the couples. I bet it's making you sick, right?

Narumi-sensei (Don't you dare skip this paragraph just because I mentioned him. I'll get mad. And I'll I know if you read this or not because I'm going to quiz you) is fine. He's still dressing like a weirdo. He's still stalking our class - it's the sixth year he's taught us. He's still pretty clingly. But don't worry, it's not me anymore.

There's this kid from the elementary division. I want you to guess who he/she resembles so much that Narumi-sensei pays attention to he/she more than he does to me. (It's kind of making me lonely.)

Did you guess? Really?

Okay. Did you guess it was me? Haha, great!

But you're wrong. It's you, Natsume; the kid resembles you.

Same stoic expression, same blunt way of doing things, same attitude that will hurt others...

Same affectionate care for your friends, same reasons to blame yourself when you have have nothing to be blamed for, even the same screwed-up justice of yours.

His name is Youichi Hijiri. Yes, it's that tiny brat who always used to be your accessory back when we were little. He's all grown up now. Nine years old and he's already halfway up my arm. I have to admit, he's also quite the looker. And let me say that I'm not a pedophile since I know you're thinking it; it's only because he reminds me so much of the man who stole my heart. Okay?

So come back soon. I can't guarantee that I won't fall for that stupid, arrogant brat like I did with you.

Inchou, Sumire, Nonoko, Anna, Kitsu, Nobara, Tono, Jinno-sensei, Nodda-chi, even Bear - they're all doing great and moving on with their lives. Some of them are already thinking about their future, some of them are taking things slow, and some of them like me, are just waiting until we get that boost of energy that motivates us to continue on.

Hey, Natsume? I miss you.

I miss you so, so much that it hurts.

I know that you told me to not cry and I know I promised myself I would be strong, but I'm just sixteen. I'm just a girl who's head over heels for someone whom she hasn't even seen for 730 nights. I'm just a girl who's in love, Natsume.

I'm trying so hard everyday to smile as if you were here by my side and holding my hand. But when I think of it like that, my eyes start to water and I'm forced to lock myself in the bathroom so no one would see my cry. I hate it when I make the people I love worry. I hate their pitied looks. I hate how they treat me as if I'm alone in the world because I'm really not. I have you.

"He's gone, Mikan," they all say. "He died last month during a mission in America."

I have you. And I hate how nobody but a few can understand that.

But what I hate the most is when I let you take that bullet. What the hell were you doing, you idiot?

It was for me. The gun was pointed at me, clearly at my heart, and you just jumped in the way of it. You don't even know many nightmares I get everytime I think of all that blood spilling from your chest. All the time I wish that it was me who got shot instead. I wish I was fast enough to counter-attack your block so I can recieve what was supposed to be mine. That way, you and I will both live because I know I'll do everything in my power to stay alive. I'll fight even if I'm standing at Death's gate. I'll strive to keep my heart beating until the last of the last of my will gets drained out of me. And I assure you, that will take years.

But with you - I've known you for too long to be not worried. I can't help it. I see the way you resent yourself. I see that when you try to hide it, it only pains you more.

Natsume, please. Please, please, please. Live. Instead of fighting for others, fight for yourself. Fight for you and me. I can't do this alone. I have been way too long and my courage is running low. There's a reason why love involves two people. You wanna know why? It's because we need each other. We have gotten to the point that if one of us disappears off the face of the earth, the other one is left to fend for themself which will only lead to their sould breaking apart, little by little. Please, don't do that to me. I'm begging you.

You matter, Natsume. In my eyes, you're worth everything and more. You've taken up so much of my heart that I don't think it's even possible to fill it once its empty. Even now, it's still full of you and all my memories of what you've done for me and those you find important.

You think we don't care about you? You think we live on without constantly reminding ourselves "Natsume Hyuuga. That's the arrogant bastard who changed my life."? Well, we do. Everyday. And I'd hate to break it to you, I do it the most.

I haven't really told you this, but I love you. I know it's a fact that no number, no degree, no Alice or magic can comprehend the amount of my feelings.

I love you, and that's that. I know you love me too. So, do me a favor? Hold on. Hold on with everything you've got up in that big, stupid head of yours. Surely beneath all the formulas, equations, memorized speeches and historical dates, you'll find a way to come back to me like you always do.

Yours truly,

Mikan


Mikan. I love you. From now until forever, more than anyone else. Close your eyes and swear that for eternity, you are mine.


Haha sorry. This was a really bitter-sweet one shot. It's my first, so I'm sorry if it's like...too long or something. I took some excerpts from the manga itself. Hope you guys liked this, and please review! though it has some little twists to it.

Stay smexy