A/N: This is for Candice who really wants to see this happen at the end of Lost. I've never written anything quite this fluffy before. It's not in my nature, but I hope you still enjoy it :D
Disclaimer: Don't own Lost or the characters.
Living with Kate. Taking care of Aaron. It all seems so perfect. Just like heaven.
I know I felt like this before
But now I'm feeling it even more
Because it came from you
Then I open up and see
The person falling here is me
A different way to be
My life is changing everyday
In every possible way
And my dreams
it's never quite as it seems
'cause you're a dream to me
Dream to me
-Dreams, The Cranberries
Every morning as you gradually swam to consciousness, the beam from the morning rays hazy as they shone through the tent, you thought maybe this was all a dream, a watercolor of light and brilliance, a world that only existed in thought and theory. This was a page out of someone else's life. Or maybe this was heaven. But, then you would feel her warm breath against your chest, her small, curly head tucked underneath your chin, and you would open your eyes. Every morning, you blinked, once, twice, and they both were still there.
On this particular morning, you woke to find Kate already up and staring at you. She looked peaceful, her hair in light waves sprawled out along the pillow, her eyes shining with adoration and just pure happiness, and you couldn't help but smile seeing her like that. She brought her index finger to her lip, signaling for you to stay quiet. You looked down to your chest, laughing lightly at the little girl, gripping your t-shirt in her small little fists, snuggled as close to you as possible.
"She loves her daddy." Kate whispered softly, grinning as you placed a light kiss on your little girl's bouncy head of ringlets. She was the spitting image of Kate; a dusting of freckles over her petite nose, brunette curls, and striking sea-foam eyes that always seemed to spark with amusement and curiosity. Kate always joked that she had a streak of her father's stubbornness and impatience, something they both had to deal with daily, but Kate also said she had your good heart. One day you asked her why she thought that and she simply said, "I saw it your eyes our first day here; there was kindness there. I'd never seen that before. And when I held Abby in my arms for the first time and she stared up at me, I saw it again."
Abigail Shephard. It had a nice ring to it, but mostly you liked it because it meant she was yours. You never knew you would love being a father so much. You had dreaded it your whole life, was unsure about it with Aaron, and had ultimately failed, become the person you had tried so desperately to separate yourself from. But in the end, you found that life was all about second chances, and maybe, as your own father had pointed out, believing in yourself. And you were good at this; you didn't need Kate to tell you that this time.
You didn't know how long you were staring at Abby before Kate began to rub her back in light circles. Her eyes were fluttering lightly, possibly at a dream she was having, but she relaxed visibly under Kate's touch, loosening her hands from your shirt and letting out a heavy sigh. You glanced up and she smiled softly at you. You reached your hand forward, cupping your palm against her cheek and then slowly tracing the features on her face; the light freckles bridging her nose, her cheekbones, her full lips.
"What are you doing?" She whispered, giggling softly as you tickled the spot right behind her ear.
"Checking to see if you're real." You said sincerely. You tried to look like you were joking, but the light concern in your eyes moved her to bring your hand to her chest right where her heart beat.
"This isn't a dream." She said. "Do you want me to pinch you to prove it?" She teased.
You didn't wait long enough for her to actually get the opportunity to do so before you kissed her lightly on the mouth. "I think that was proof enough." You teased back.
You could feel Abby begin to wake up as she yawned and stretched her small little fingers against your chest. "Daddy…" She whimpered. "Is it time to get up?"
"Sure, kiddo…" You said. Suddenly, Abby burst into a peal of giggles. "Daddy, your chest rumbles when you talk. It's like a dinosaur's coming. RAWRRR!!"
"Oh, yeah?" You said, picking her up and tickling her. "Well, a dinosaur wouldn't be able to do this!"
"Stop, Daddy, stop!" She said between breaths.
"Do you want to go fishing with Daddy today?" You asked, knowing full well that Abby loved the ocean more than anything. The problem was always trying to get her to stand still. She was so much like Kate in that way. You worried that at only three years old, she would get caught in a wave, and you wouldn't be able to save her.
"Really? Can we?" Abby said, wiggling with excitement.
"Yeah sure." You chuckled.
"But what's Mommy going to do?" Abby said, looking to Kate, her brow furrowed with concern. You smiled; that was Abby, always worried about others. She wouldn't even allow herself to have fun if she knew someone was unhappy.
"Don't worry sweetie. Mommy's gonna go pick some fruit today." Kate said, tweaking Abby's little nose.
"You think it's safe today?" You said in hushed tones, trying not to give Abby any concern. Most of the dangers the jungle had held were now nonexistent, or rather they did not yet exist. You weren't sure what time period you were in, but it was early. All the statues and ruins were still intact and the Black Rock was nowhere to be found. There also weren't any other people around as far as you could tell, but you could still hear the smoke monster, even see it on occasion. Kate went out on her own often, but you still worried about her. After everything you had been through together over the last seven years, you couldn't help but do so.
"Yeah, I'll be fine." She said, giving you a sweet kiss on the corner of your mouth. She had gotten used to your overprotective nature. She looked back as she opened the tent flap to walk outside and smiled, and you knew she understood that you only did it because you loved her.
"I love you." She said. In every other relationship you had ever had, you thought you knew what it felt like to have those three little words said to you. But then along came Kate and suddenly all those other times just sounded so routine, so much like an obligatory statement. When Kate said it, you could almost feel your heart pop clean out of your chest. You'd never felt so alive.
"I love you too." You said a little bit breathlessly. She flushed with pleasure, a slight blush rising in her cheeks before blowing a kiss to Abby and saying her goodbyes.
"You ready, kiddo?" You said, picking Abby up and resting her on your hip.
"Yeah! I want to see the fish!" She said, clapping her hands together in delight.
"Okay, let's go." You said.
You picked up the two make-shift spears you had made out of sticks and some rock (turns out those Boy Scout skills had come in handy) and the net you had found one day walking in the jungle and walked down to the nearest stretch of beach.
Fishing was a patient person's game, and Abby had the attention span, of well, a three year old. You'd wait for a fish, ten, twenty minutes at a time, get one in your sights and then Abby would toddle over, a seashell in her hand, eager to show you, and just like that, the fish was gone. But it was still the perfect day; Abby ran up and down the sand, shrieking with peals of laughter as the water licked her heels, and you caught three fish in all, not bad considering the crude supplies.
When the sun on your back became just a little too intense and the sweat was coming in waves down your neck, you decided to call it quits for the day, calling Abby to your side.
"You wanna play a game Abby? Your mommy used to play it before she met your daddy, and then she showed me how."
"What kind of a game?" She asked, looking at you inquisitively.
"Well, what you do is you stand in the sand and when the waves come in, your feet sink into the sand." Abby didn't look too sure about the sinking part. She stepped forward tentatively before asking, "Can I hold your hand? You know, just in case I get buried too deep?"
"Of course" You said, outstretching your hand.
You loved the way her soft smooth tiny fingers wrapped around your rough palm. It gave you this feeling of security, like an anchor tying a boat down or a rope holding down a hot air balloon. You liked to be grounded, sure, and you felt that with Abby rather than the insecurity that you thought you would feel being a father.
Every day you wondered why you had been given this life; after all the pain and misery, you had been offered a small slice of heaven, maybe something that was even better than heaven if that was possible. You wondered why you had been given a second chance, not just in life, but with Kate as well. You wondered at what you had done to deserve this, this perfect life. But, staring at the ocean, its tides rolling in and out, you knew you would never be given the answer. Life was ever-changing and as constant as the tide, a paradox, something that just could not be explained. You were willing to accept that, to let go. You looked down to Abby and you knew you didn't need to know why.
Amazingly, she sat still, just staring out at the horizon. You could practically see the wheels turning in her head and you wondered what she was thinking about so intently.
"Daddy?" She said finally, tugging on your hand. You leaned down next to her, trying to get down to eye level with her. "What kiddo?"
"Do people that love each other do this together?" She asked.
"Why would you say that?"
"Because you did it with Mommy." She countered matter of factly.
"Yeah, I guess so." You said, nodding your head, amazed at the insight of your own three year old daughter.
"Daddy?"
"Yeah."
"I love you." She said shyly, but her sincerity almost brought tears to your eyes.
"I love you too." You said, breathless for the second time in one day.
She kissed you quickly on the cheek and whispered, "Thanks for taking me fishing."
Later that night when Abby was in the tent, already asleep, Kate finally made her way back to camp. You had tried not to worry, but she had been gone for a whole day, which was unusual even for her.
You met her at the tree line, kissing her fully and passionately, living in the moment, something you had been unable to do your entire life. You heard her breath catch as your tongue parted her lips and tasted the fresh mango laced in her mouth, and as you broke away seconds later, breathless not only from the duration of the kiss, but also from its intensity, you couldn't help but think that life did have its miracles. Because your dream had become a reality. And every morning you couldn't wait to wake up.
Thanks for reading and please review! I would like to hear anything you think, either good or bad. Reviews are what help me to improve. Thanks!
