Chapter 1

"Oh Rodney, why do you have to be like this?"

"What? You asked me under false pretences," Rodney spat accusingly.

Carson stood stoically and breathed deeply. "Marry me!" he said finally.

Rodney's body tensed and he studied Carson's paling face. "What? Carson did you just ask me…?" He didn't quite know what sort expression had formed on his face, but it can't have been a nice expression, as Carson paled further.

"Aye, I'm so'ry," Carson mumbled as he ran for the nearest exit. Rodney followed and caught his arm, "Carson wait, let me answer or just say something."

"No Rodney I have to go." Carson wriggled free and ran to the nearest thing… Elizabeth's office.

He paused just out of view from her office to catch his breath. Is this really what you should be doing? He asked himself. Shouldn't you be going back and sorting things out with Rodney, not running off like some little scared mouse? Carson almost turned round to head back towards Rodney, but then he remembered the look on his partner's face when he had proposed, and he knocked on Elizabeth's door.

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"Come in."

"Dr. Weir I want to transfer back to Earth," he said quickly before he lost his resolve. "I'm so'ry but I canna stay here no more, please Elizabeth."

Elizabeth looked up from her work with a surprised expression on her face. "Whoa Carson, what's happened?" she asked the doctor, "I need a valid reason to send you home; you are a vital member of this expedition."

"There are better people than I," Carson argued. "My work is becoming affected and I've already caused problems with Rodney, and we all know you need him more than me." Elizabeth opened her mouth to protest that last remark, but one look at his face told her that now was not the time for a fight. She sighed, resigning to the fact that she would have to wait for the real reason for Carson's request.

"I'm sorry Carson, but we can't lose you. However, I will send you home for a month to rest and clear your head and then report back."

Carson dropped his head, unwilling to meet her gaze. "Aye that will do, thank you Elizabeth. When can I leave?"

"I'll relieve you of duties now; pack your things and report back in an hour."

Carson nodded and left, ignoring everyone he passed and mumbling Gaelic to himself. To most it was just incoherent babbling, although the people on Atlantis were used to foreign languages being muttered along the corridors. Carson reached his room, grabbed his rucksack and began to throw some clothes and belongings in it. He looked across his room and then outside to his view of the Atlantean ocean. He sighed heavily and left his room as the light faded behind him. He walked quickly but cautiously to the gate room, trying to avoid the places he knew Rodney could be.

Elizabeth nodded to Carson as he now stood in the gate room. They had long managed to keep a stable connection with Earth, which Carson was now very thankful for. Elizabeth told Chuck, a technician, to dial the gate and as the last chevron lit the puddle of mesmerising light appeared. Carson edged forward towards the gate, still nervous of ancient technology. He took one last look at Elizabeth and smiled. He turned towards the gate, but stopped as he heard his name being hollered through Atlantis, and it wasn't coming from his comm. as he'd made sure that was left in his room.

"Carson! Carson Beckett! Wait!" Rodney hollered once again as he reached the gate room. He almost wished he hadn't as he saw Carson's whitening face. "Carson you can't go," he continued breathlessly. "I, ahem, you are needed here and we have matters to discuss."

Carson shook his head slowly. "I'm truly so'ry… 'Ya shouldna 'ave… you need to stay away." And with that he stepped through the stargate. Rodney ran forwards but it was to late; the gate cut off before he got there.

"Carson?" he whispered to himself. He felt anger rise in his throat as he turned and ran up the steps towards the command room. "Where did he go?" he shouted, "Why did you let him go? You should have kept him here; damn that foolish man! I need to follow; I need to go talk to him."

"I'm sorry Rodney, he didn't look like he wanted to listen, and permission denied, you are to stay here on Atlantis," Elizabeth said in the most calming voice she could manage. She tried to put her hand on Rodney's shoulder, but he shook her off.

"Earth? He went to Earth? Great, just great, he'll never come back now. He'll do all that he can to stay away; he's just as scared as the day he sat in the command chair and set a drone on Lt. Colonel Sheppard and General O'Neill."

"Be that as it may he needs the time alone," Elizabeth replied, "and I think you do too. Two friends in each others' pockets can get suffocating."

Rodney rolled his eyes with frustration. "Oh please, tell me you are not serious, just friends? We ain't been 'friends' for some time now."

"You two? A couple?"

"Yes a couple, what else would we be?" Even after everything that had happened on Atlantis, he was still amazed by the blindness of his colleagues.

Elizabeth's eyebrow twitched. "I see, so you two have had a lovers tiff and Carson has scampered off back to Earth," she said with annoyance. "You've truly put your foot in this time haven't you?"

"I'm insulted at that accusation," Rodney huffed. Why did everyone always blame him? "It wasn't me this time, actually. Carson asked me to marry him, just before he ran." Elizabeth gasped and she could see the crew around having a similar reaction. Despite the fact that this information had not properly registered yet she continued, "Maybe you should come into my office and explain to me what went on."

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On the other side of the gate Carson stepped out of the wormhole and fainted. He thought he could hear Rodney say "passing out of manly hunger" somewhere just out of sight, but unfortunately this was not the case. He awoke in the infirmary and was disorientated by his surroundings. He sat himself up and called for a nurse.

Daniel Jackson was on the next bed along having stitches removed. He lent around the nurse and gave Carson a friendly smile. "Dr Beckett you're awake. Good to see you again."

Carson returned the smile, "Like wise Dr. Jackson. Erm what happened?"

"Got stabbed off world, a native planet… oh you mean yourself? You came through the gate and passed out. I'm sure they'll let you out soon." With that the nurse indicated that she was finished with Daniel's stitches. He smiled again and excused himself to go and write his report, leaving Carson with nothing to do but lean his head against his pillow where he promptly dozed off.

A few hours had passed before he woke again. A doctor was signing off his chart and nodded when he asked about releasing him from the infirmary. "Major General Landry is waiting for you," she said before leaving. Carson slowly made his way to the office to find the door was already open.

"Dr Beckett welcome, how you feeling?" the Major General asked politely.

"Better, thank you. Not sure why it happened; maybe I need this holiday more than I thought."

Major General Landry smiled wryly and continued, "Dr Weir explained in a brief transmission that you would be coming and that to ask exactly where you are planning to go, if you have any plans?"

Carson sat in the chair and faced General Landry. "I'm so'ry I had'na thought that far, although visiting my mam would be nice." He paused as he remembered something he had thought about. "However there is one place I would very much like to go" he continued, "Cardigan Bay in West Wales; there is a conference on Astrobiology there and, well it's somewhere my colleagues wouldn't think of," he admitted, "I hope."

Major Colonel Landry studied the doctor's face. "I'm unsure of your predicament Dr Beckett, although I will get Walter to organise transport and will disclose your location only to Dr Weir."

Carson sighed with relief. "Thank ya greatly," he said.

Carson went to his temporary accommodation, except he had to ask an airman for directions. The base wasn't like Atlantis; none of the doors opened automatically for him, something he would need to get used to, and his room was bland and dark. He lay on the somewhat hard bed, unsure now if he had made the right decision.