A/N: This is the second songfic I've ever writter and the longest one of my works too. I've been listening to Bruno Mars lately and I thought up of a plot while listening to this song. His albums are great. :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Jonas or the song 'Talking To the Moon' by Bruno Mars.

Talking To the Moon

I know you're somewhere out there,
Somewhere far away.
I want you back,
I want you back.

I stare outside the tinted window of our limousine. Rows and rows of fans screaming our names while trying to get close to the car. Their faces full of anticipation and excitement. They've waited for us to come back from a year long tour. They have waited for Jonas; for Kevin, Joe, and me. More than a million girls ready to embrace us and our music. More than half of them wish for us to direct our smiles at them. More than a million.

But I only want to one girl, ever since I left New Jersey and till now. I only want her and no one else. Now, I'm back to the same place I saw her. She was one of those screaming fans. She was one of those girls who longed for Jonas, for me.

I know what I did a year back was unfair to her, almost unforgivable. She did nothing but made me smile during my darkest days. She made me see the brighter side of things. She shared her happiness with me. She made my burdens her problem. She was never selfless, unlike me. She gave me her heart and I left it dangling on a thin rope.

I never came during her times of need. She was already broken even before I left and I turned her into ashes when I did.

But they don't understand.
You're all I have,
You're all I have.

There's truth in the saying 'You'll never know what you have once it's gone.' Never once did I tell her I loved her when we were together but she didn't complain. I was being a selfish monster but she deserved honesty. I never uttered those words because I thought I didn't love her. I was so caught up in my own crisis that I never realized my happiness with her was genuine and that unrecognizable feeling I get when she smiles at me warmly was actually love and not just plain guilt. I thought I was just using her to forget and that I was far from being in love.

I was wrong. She was my other half. The better half. She made me complete and I'm quite stupid for realizing that too late.

At night when the stars
light up my room,
I sit by myself

It's not like I wanted to leave. I didn't want to stay either.

I know that didn't made sense. I needed her but I needed my space too. I felt as if she was suffocating me that I grabbed the opportunity to go on tour to get away. She was all I had to make me happy and when the time came when she broke, I took that as a sign to come clean with her and tell her that there was nothing there. There was nothing between us but my selfishness of the warmth she gives off. I was just a mere human being, I needed a new source of happiness or I might break too. And I don't wanna be broken again. I won't be broken this time. But I never came clean because every time I look at her, it felt as if I was breaking too. I never told her what I really felt and what she was to me.

The best route to take was just to run away. And that I did.

I realized that wasn't the best way at all. That shouldn't have been an option at all. I was just being a coward. She deserved more than that. She thought I was more than that but it turns out I was one too.

And now, I'm here all alone in my hotel room, trying to straighten out my thoughts. At first, it was just my head that was hurting but staring at the night sky made my heart ache too. I remembered what she said the night she found me on the other side of her door. I was mourning for my first love's death and she seemed like the only one who didn't shower me with sympathy and pity. When I ran out of the firehouse, my instincts lead me to her. Maybe I was lead there because my sub-consciousness told me I needed something real, something to make me feel. I needed to feel the hurt from losing someone I loved so much. What she said to me on her porch was what I just needed.

Talking to the Moon
Try to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side.

She didn't lie. She never said it was going to be okay. She never said the hurt will fade away. She just sat there holding me up when tears fell from my eyes. She stroked my back.

Try talking to the moon, she whispered.

I didn't get what she said at first but realization dawned on me and caught up on her. I broke away from her arms and faced the moon which looked like it was mocking me. I poured out all the hurt I had to the moon and pretended it was Ally. I probably woke up her family from my yells but no one came outside to quiet me down.

Talking to me too
Or am I a fool
who sits alone
Talking to the moon

She knew what she was getting into. She knew I was broken. She wanted to mend me, I wanted to be mended. It was a perfect set-up for us. The means we used to mend and to be mended was no where near perfect though.

I never told her but there were times I pretended she was Ally. A lot of times, actually. I think she knew what I was doing to fix myself. Maybe that was why she never expected me to answer her back whenever she says those three little words. She knew but never complained because she knew she loved me before hand. She loved me. Reason enough to go through everything just to make me happy when she herself wasn't. I don't know how she did it but she did fix me. You could still see the stitches though. I was fine but then, I'm not.

I never knew I really did love her until I lost her, until I was alone. I'm a fool, a fool for running away. I'm a jerk, a monster.

I'm feeling like I'm famous,
The talk of the town.
They say I've gone mad.

I think I've gone mad, my brothers agree. They knew she was good for me, I'm not pretty sure if I was any good for her. She had the burden of being bombarded by the press. She had to make herself look prettier for my publicity. She had to get paper cuts from all the hate mails she got. She never complained. She was a puzzle I've only figured out when I took a break from her.

I've gone mad
But they don't know
what I know.

She was way wiser than she seems. She saw through people. She knows when they're lying and knowing that hurts her. She never uttered a word against anyone for lying though. There was a time when she wanted to and that was the time when breathing was starting to get difficult around her. I was there with her that cold afternoon. We were sitting at the bench inside the atrium. I haven't seen her that whole morning that I wanted to be close to her and her seemingly never-ending warmth. I wanted to touch her but she flinched away when I did. She whispered sorry's, one after the other and getting louder and louder. She was breaking down. The pain she kept inside of her heart was escaping through an invisible hole.

It was a painful sight to see that I never mentioned it to her or our friends.

She was breaking but I never did anything for the fear that she might drag me down with her when the time comes that she can't handle it. And I sure can't handle that.

Cause when the sun goes down,
someone's talking back.
Yeah,
They're talking back.

The cold crept in so fast that evening. Everything felt like it was all in slow motion and blurred. I just wanted to see that angelic smile on her face to scare away the cold. But all I got are shouts of frustration and desperation. Curses flew back and forth. We were both out of control. That was it. My star won't ever come back. I had to go on. I left her there crying on the same porch where she gazed at me lovingly just months ago.

I never said good bye. I never bothered to apologize. She was broken but I still left.

At night when the stars
light up my room,
I sit by myself.

"Nick, we think you need to stop moping around. Seriously, bro." Joe said when he entered my room without even knocking.

I just stared at him blankly. I've been keeping my act together. I'm pretty sure it was not noticeable but people keep on surprising me these days. "I'm not moping, Joe. Thinking deeply is different from moping."

"Seems the same to me. Tell you what, Stella wants us to come down to the firehouse tomorrow. She's throwing a welcome back party for us. That should at least cheer you up." He told me with that huge grin on his face. He's been in love with Stella ever since and the long distance was never a road block for them.

"Ok, Joe. Now, please go and close the door on your way out." I wasn't in a good mood. He shrugged and stomped out the door muttering something like "Brothers."

I sighed. She's gonna be at the party. I'd have to face her. I don't know if I could do it.

Talking to the Moon,
Try to get to You
In hopes you're on the other side
Talking to me too.
Or am I a fool who sits alone,
Talking to the moon.

I have to get ready. I needed to let her know. She has to know. I don't care if she hates me. I just had to let her know. She thought I never loved her but I did and I still do.

The moonlight illuminated the phone resting on top of a couple music sheets. I needed to hear her voice before I come face to face with her. Me and my needs.

I scrolled down to find her number. I hope she didn't change it at all. Just a little hello and I would be contented with that. It ringed and kept on ringing until it got sent to her voicemail. I listened to her voice. She sounded happy, unlike me.

I dialed her number again but this time, she picked up.

"Hello, this is Macy. Who am I speaking to?" She sounded as polite as ever that a small smile broke into my face. I got tongue-tied by just her voice. She hang her phone and even moments after that I just sat there motionless.

Do you ever hear me calling?
Cause every night
I'm talking to the moon
Still trying to get to you.

"Welcome back!" All of our Jersey friends yelled and hugged us. The firehouse still looked the same. This time though, it was filled with balloons and confetti. Familiar faces everywhere I looked. I scanned the room hoping to spot her and maybe even talk to her. I finally saw her and she was walking towards us.

I expected her to look furious and angry but she wasn't. She was smiling and the sparks were back into her eyes. She engulfed the three of us in a big bear hug like we were all still the same. I furrowed my eyebrows.

I know you're somewhere out there,
Somewhere far away.

Clearly, she has moved on. I haven't.

A/N: So, how is it? Good or bad? I don't know if I ended it well but I'm planning on continuing this if I get good feedbacks. It's kinda confusing, I know. I just kept on writing and writing so sorry if some of the parts seemed off. :)

Anyway, reached my goal days before Christmas break! 2,027 words! Thanks to all those who have kept on reading my fics. That means a lot to me(to any writer for that matter). You people have inspired me to write and try new things out. I love all of you even though I don't really talk much.