The Rhone Valley

The characters of True Blood Belong to Mr. Alan Ball. The characters of SVM belong to Miss Charlene Harris. No infringement on my part is intended. I have not BETA, editor or other such charming person. My mistakes are my own.

Pam was walking up the sidewalk and wanted to scream her discontent to whoever the fuck was listening...but then, they would probably blab to her maker that she was having a hissy fit. Like he did not already know. Fucking maker, anyway...that fucking Eric! Dr. Fucking Frankenstein in a Viking body!

Fucking Vikings and their absolutely fearless way of doing shit! "Hey, what do you think is beyond all those big assed waves?" she spit out into the night, sounding like Eric. "Not one fucking clue. Let's take the longboat and go find out. Maybe we'll find land, maybe we will just fucking sale all they way to Valhalla! Well fuck yes, in case we do, grab an extra ration of mead, sharpen our swords and fuck all the women one last time!"

It was all she could do not to rip the door off the hinges of this house of horrors!

If she had a nuke, she would set if off in the Rhone Valley! It was just a real shame that the breathers had no idea who made the most expensive fucking wine in the world...and also the tastiest and most affordable. And also a vintage the winos could afford. And then there was just every other bottle that was corked in the Old World. Eric was just fucking wealthy by his own right. Then, when Godric, she wanted to stamp her foot in disgust about his just fucking stupid loss of life, met the sun, Eric had inherited all of his wealth. If she was going to be turned, she had picked the right fucking maker, that was for damn sure. Pbbbllltttt! Right now she wanted to kick his ass for the fuckery he was involved in.

Gawd, she hated this place! Frankenstein's castle! She hated what Eric did here. Not so much the physical act, but the emotional one. Ever since he had met that little blonde fuck head of a breather...oh fuck!

The women passed her on the stairs. "He would not eat," Ziggy said with a sad voice as she passed her by. Well of course not, I am Eric Fucking Northman and shit happens on my schedule not yours!

There he sat...always in something that resembled a throne. He was so obviously meant to rule and command and would heever stop fucking around with his life?

"Hello child," gawd she missed the sound of his voice.

There was no mistaking what was on his chest. "Eric, what the fuck? The virus...did you have to infect yourself with the virus?"

"Yes," came his calm reply.

The tears started and would not stop. "Is this our legacy, the bat shit crazies?" she wailed. "You are my maker," she crumpled to the floor, "why would you do this?"

Picking her up, he sat down with her in the chair. "Because this is the third time I have been infected. The vaccine works. I actually looked much worse fifteen minute ago.

No tears," he grinned at her. "Part of my legacy is sitting here in my lap."

Pam wiped at her eyes. "Do not try and make my feel better. What the fuck have you got your happy band of mad scientists working on?"

"We are going to start pushing the serum for the Hep V. All the PR is in place and will soon be in play. We are mixing it with the True Blood that we bottle here. It should be on the shelves in a couple of days."

"How nice of you to sidestep my question. What else, Eric? The vineyard smelled differently. What else are you fucking around with? And don't fuck with me. The last time the vineyard smelled differently you wanted to come out of the dark and drag the rest of us along with you. So your team of egg-heads came up with True Blood. What the fuck are they working on now?"

Eric was thoughtful and a small smile played about his lips. "That fucking little Russell was right. Take a fae into the laboratory and give us Day and Night...a true day walking drink with a little something extra."

"What?" Pam drew back from him. "What fae? How?"

"When I left you, my first stop was here. Had my team draw blood from me the elixir that was Warlow. Then I set them to reproducing it. Apparently I am in still possession of my hunter and gather skills as well. I spent a lot of time between here and The Realm of Fae. Transporting back and forth as many different plants as I could. That is what smells differently in the vineyard. Here in the Rhone Valley, we are growing fae plants and the extracts from them and the blood sample from me gave the team something to play with. And play they did.

When my True Blood factories were blown, I used the insurance money from those to dump into newer buildings and equipment. Very state of the art because I am going to need one that can produce the product that is tailored to me and mine."

"Oh fuck Eric," she closed her eyes and shuck her head in disbelief.

"I told you child, I want it all. With this cure for Hep V, the world will see this as a stepping stone for curing AIDS, the human version of Hepatitis, and whatever the next super pandemic is that comes along. We need humans," he stressed. "And they will be willing to forgive and eventually it will dull in the subconscious what terrible monsters we can be."

"Eric please, this is not about all the humans, this is about one small blonde...one in particular," she hissed at him.

"Child," his voice was even and thoughtful. "I have been alive for a thousand years. I do not want to be like Godric, having walked here and then just become tired of the journey. I want it all. The night and the day. A family. With what we grow here in the Rhone Valley, this is going to come to pass."

"Oh fuck Eric," she peered into his eyes. "You have a family."

"Yes, and you are my child. My child of the night. But I want the white picket fence, Pam. I want the baby in the cradle. I fucking want it all," he said, his voice set. "And I have enough money and the technology is there. All that was needed was just someone with enough money and the desire to make that happen. Well, hello just watch me write the fucking check. Want a Swiss bank account instead? I can fucking make that happen."

For a moment, Pam thought she was breathing. "And, and..."

"Yes," he settled back. "From my fae enriched blood and the plants I brought back, which are thriving in the vineyard I must say, I have the magic cocktail. I can day walk. I also use a SPF 30 and stick to the shade, but yes, I can day walk."

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck..." her voice got softer as she was lost in the possibilities. Her eyes went to his chest. "The virus is gone."

"Yes," he nodded. "Here comes Dr. Chan to draw blood now."

Pam was watching everything while the doctor extracted blood for only who knew what brand of the next round of Frankenstein madness. He and Eric exchanged a few words in Chinese and then the doctor withdrew.

"So what's your plan Eric? Become fertile, raise yourself a bunch of little Northmans?" she said, smirking.

"Yes," he answered. "What? Did you think I was not serious? I said I wanted it all. I want to be a thousand years of vampire bad-ass and a wife and a baby. My baby in my wife, mine," he growled at her.

"This has been your plan all along," her voice held disbelief.

Eric's face told her nothing. "Child," his voice was soft. "Every century I watched the humans progress. As science became more than just an explanation of the how and why...I also watched it become an art form. I encouraged it, added to it. Threw money at it. A lot of fucking money," he smiled.

"I am a Viking, Pamela. That is who I am in my soul, the core of my being." His voice became louder, edgier. "I want my village back. I want to be able to put my longboat in the water and sail. I want to be able to stare my enemy in the eyes and defeat them. I want to come home to my wife and children at the end of the day and hear their tales of wonder just as they listen to mine.

I want child," his voice got louder, "what I fucking want! I want to be a vamp/human hybrid. And I am well on my way."