Ladies and gents of Fanfiction, I have but one thing to say.

By now if you've read my many unfinished attempts at multichapter fics, you should know I am very bad with updating. The only reason I am uploading this new story is because I have five other chapters for it and am in the process of writing another. That being said, don't expect me to update in a timely manner.

I'm hoping a story like this will be easier to write because I'm honestly just editing the plot to put my OC in, and I am never in shortage of Naruto plot. By the way, her name is still Suten, but this OC is different. Up till now to write Suten I've been channeling my hyperactive and crazy side. Now I'm trying a more cynical and sarcastic side to her. So far I like it, but I want to know how you think!

So cross your fingers, or as Eminem would say, 'Hold your nose, cause here goes the cold water.'

BTW, miss me? I know you did.

I don't own Naruto, all I own is Suten.


My name is Takashi Suten. I'm not going to go into my family history, my blood type, my height and weight(because unlike other girls, I just don't care about how many pounds I've gained.) All you need to know is I am currently 12 years old, with black hair I keep in a mid-ponytail and blue eyes. Not light blue, not dark blue. Just blue. Deal with it. My ninja outfit is straight-up black and white: a white…for lack of a better word, short tube top dress with slits up the sides and a black belt around the waist(because where else do belts go, really?), a black open vest that stops at my chest, and black leggings to just past my knees. Oh, and my fingerless gloves. Black. And my ninja sandals. Black. I promise, it sounds like I'm wearing all black and just a little white, but if you put the outfit together I look like a stylish…zebra.

Anyway, my class had graduated from the Academy yesterday, and we were all mostly sitting in the same seats we had been for years(hopefully for the last time) waiting for Iruka-sensei to come in and tell us what teams we're on- aka Orientation Day. Seriously, I couldn't wait to be out of here.

"TA-DA!"

Startled, I jerked out of my daydreaming and looked up, groaning as I saw none other than Sakura and Ino bickering over whose foot had entered the classroom first. Ignoring them for the moment, I looked over the other classroom occupants and picked out the Rookie 9. There was Sasuke, sitting where he had been for years. There was Shikamaru, getting as much sleep as he could. There was Choji, stuffing his face. There was-

"Naruto, move it! I'm trying to get past you!"

I looked back and sighed as the three most annoying people in this class met. Uzumaki Naruto, the kid who was always getting into trouble and making us do extra work. Haruno Sakura, the girl who beat up on people one minute and the next blushed and giggled sickeningly. And of course, Uchiha Sasuke. They called him the class heartthrob and the number one rookie. I called him an asexual jerk.

Naruto jumped up on the desk and started an intense glaring contest with Sasuke, while Sakura and the other fangirls looked on.

"Cut it out, Naruto! Stop glaring at Sasuke-kun!"

"Beat him up, Sasuke-kun!"

They were too close, I realized. Huh. It almost looked as if they were about to…

SMOOCH!

I stared, wide eyed, at Sasuke and Naruto in what seemed to be an intense lip lock. Words failed me just then. And when they stopped failing me, all I could think was, What just happened?

"Naruto! You're dead!" And then began one of the most painful beatdowns I had ever seen in my life- okay, so I looked up for a minute to check out the damage. Thankfully, Iruka-sensei walked in at that moment and began talking about how we were all ninja now, but still the bottom of the heap as genin, blah, blah, blah. Yes, I admit, I tuned him out for the first 3 minutes of the Orientation. I honestly didn't care.

"And now for team 7."

Immediately I perked up and started wishing again. 'Please, please, please.'

"Uzumaki Naruto."

"Huh?"

'Oh heck no.'

"Haruno Sakura."

"YES!"

"I'm doomed…"

'Definitely no now.'

"Uchiha Sasuke."

"CHA!"

"I'm doomed…"

'Yes! All the ridiculous people are in one group, so now I don't have to worry about…'

"However, we had an odd number of students this year, so Team 7 will be having a 4th member, Takashi Suten."

Wait a sec... That was me. I was in a team…with almost everybody I hated from this class. With a groan, I slammed my head into the desk, ignoring the pain from the hitai-ate. Somebody kill me. Just kill me now.

"Iruka-senseii!"

Hmm. It seemed in my mental moping I missed the rest of the teams being called. Meh, I didn't really care.

"How come someone as awesome as me got grouped with Sasuke?" Naruto whined, stabbing a finger at the aforementioned brunette. Wait, isn't brunette a word for people with brown hair? So what's Sasuke's hair color called? Navy-nette? Wait, getting off topic.

Iruka sighed. "Of the 29 people in this class, Sasuke has the top scores." He gave Naruto a look. "Yours are at the bottom."

I couldn't help joining in with the class's laughter. Oh, Naruto. You poor, poor idiot you.

"You both being placed on the same team provides a balance. Add Sakura and Suten in the middle, and you have a completely even team."

"Just stay out of my way," I heard Sasuke grumble. "Dobe."

That was it for Naruto. "What was that?" he yelled, only to be violently put in his place by Sakura.

"Shut up, Naruto!"

Even though I knew I would regret it, I said with a sigh, "So, I've got the loudmouth idiot, the crazy fangirl, and the spoiled rich kid on my squad. You're right, Iruka-sensei- good thing I'm here to even things out."

I felt glares burning into my head, and I turned and stuck my tongue out at the three of them. I really didn't want to have anything to do with them at all, so I was just letting them know I hated all of them so there was no confusion.

"What did you call me?" Sasuke asked dangerously, eyes glinting.

I looked him dead in the eye. "Spoiled. Rich kid."

His eyes narrowed. Obviously he wasn't used to girls talking to him like this. "Go drown yourself."

"Go burn in a hole."

"Go fall off a cliff."

"Go kiss a frog." There were some 'Oohs' at this.

"...I hate you."

"Right back atcha."

And we ended in silence. Until someone decided to come to Sasuke's rescue.

"Who do you think you are?" Sakura screeched. "Insulting Sasuke-kun like that! Why, I oughta-"

I shot her a glare, allowing some of my killing intent to seep out. "Shut it, Pinky!"

She shut it, though looking a little stunned.

Iruka blinked at the sudden explosion of hostility. "Oookay... As much as I know this is a bad idea, you're all dismissed for lunch. We'll meet back here so you can all meet your sensei."

I grabbed my bento box and was gone before anyone could stop me. I really didn't want a confrontation, and I knew one was coming.

I ended up sitting for lunch in one of the trees, like I had for years. I was halfway through my onigri when I heard Sakura sigh. "Yeah, right. That's never gonna happen."

I snorted. Probably thinking about Sasuke again. Although it was good that she realized she didn't have a chance-

"Sakura...you have such a large, noble brow...it makes me want to kiss it."

It took all I had to keep from spitting out my mouthful of rice. Was that Sasuke? I looked down from my branch, squinting my eyes. Yes, it was Sasuke- wait, no, it wasn't. I'd been classmates with these people too long to mistake a chakra signature. That was definitely Naruto. But what the heck was he doing pretending to be Sasuke?

"I just want...you to love me, Sasuke..."

And I had lost valuable dialogue by spacing again. Great. I couldn't help noticing how close Sakura and 'Sasuke' seemed to be now. It looked as if they were about to...no. They wouldn't.

"I'm desperate..."

Yeah, no duh. I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing hard. 'Please, something happen, something happen to mess this up...'

"Gotta go!"

I looked down just in time to see 'Sasuke' scurrying off holding his stomach, leaving Sakura in the dust. I blinked. Ookay…Well, that was fast.

Since obviously nothing else interesting was going to happen, I jumped down from the tree- scaring the heck out of poor lovesick Sakura- and headed on my way. There was plenty of time to kill before lunch ended and we headed back inside, so I amused myself with humming as I sat in another tree.

What can I say? I like trees.

"Hey, you."

Great. Now what? I looked down to see Sasuke- the real Sasuke- in all his 'glory'. Joy. "What do you want, Uchiha?"

His eyes were narrowed in a glare as he looked up at me, arms folded. "To finish what we started in the classroom. Get down here. Now."

I lay on the branch, dangling my hand idly above his head. "Sorry, you don't tell me what to do."

He swatted at my hand. I pulled it out of reach and dangled it again. He kept trying to hit it. So, because I hated him, I made fun of him.

"Come on, Uchiha. Just a little higher! Jump! Jump! Reach for it! Come on, reach!"

I heard growling. Oooh, now he was MAD. A mad Uchiha- my worst nightmare. Note the heavy sarcasm.

"You want me to come get you?" he asked darkly, making hand signs. "I'll get you."

I gave him a bored look. "Yeah, real scary…" I drawled as he sucked in a deep breath. "What're you gonna do, Big Bad Wolf? Are you gonna blow my house down?"

And then he blew fire.

Actual fire. Not red air- actual, hot fire. 'Katon: Gokyakku no Jutsu!'

I dove for the ground just in time, tucking and rolling to ensure none of the flames had gotten to me. When I could confirm I hadn't been singed, I stood and looked up at the now burning tree. "Wow. You sacrificed a tree to talk to me. I'm flattered," I told him. By now a crowd had gathered.

"I don't care about killing trees," he snapped, turning to face me again. "Listen. I don't care who you are, but if you think that acting like me is going to get me to like you any more, you've got another thing coming."

…what?

I stared at him blankly as it slowly began to dawn on me what he had just said. "You think…I like you? You actually think…I'm trying to win your attention?"

"Hn. There's no other reason you would-"

It's a shame he never got to finish his sentence. Because by that time my fist had already connected with his face.

Everyone stared as the great and powerful Uchiha Sasuke went flying into the dirt from the punch of a girl. This must have been a degrading moment for him.

I cracked my knuckles, my killer intent coming out in waves. "Now YOU listen. I don't like you. I never liked you. And I will NEVER like you. I would rather kiss the Hokage then spend ten seconds in your company. So don't expect me to come running after you with hearts in my eyes like your brainless little fangirls. You are a stuck up, overbearing, arrogant, whiny little prince who needs to crush other people to make himself feel better. Grow up."

And with that, I walked away. Leaving the Uchiha to nurse his wounded pride.


Take that, Sasuke! Looks like Suten isn't one of your fanclub after all, huh? No, I'm just kidding. I still love you...even though you just got punched and taken down a few pegs by a girl.

But I don't want to hear Sasuke whine: I want to know what you think. You know the drill: Questions? Comments? Concerns? Please review!

No, seriously. PLEASE! With SOPA casting a shadow over every site I frequent, I don't know if this is the last time I'll hear from you again. So review, okay?

Please?