In Which Sherlock Asks Questions Instead Of Being A Sadistic Idiot

''The truth, Mycroft.''

''I don't know —''

''I will find out.''

The third person in the room interrupted the staring match. ''He will, you know. If you don't want Mary to find out first, you'd better just tell him. I'll leave, if you think I should. Er.''

Mycroft had switched his glare onto John Watson, who was standing by the window. ''Yes, that would be preferred.''

''No.''

''Sherlock —''

''John stays.''

Mycroft sighed. ''Very well. Is Lestrade coming too? Perhaps Mary and Rosamund? Miss Hooper? Is Mrs. Hudson going to bring us tea?''

''Oh, the sarcasm,'' John grumbled. ''No, it's just me, Sherlock dragged me here, and you know I keep secrets.''

''Yes, I know. Very well, Sherlock. The truth.''

''The entire truth. I found the birth certificate; Hermione Euros Morgan Holmes, born one year before me, and the death certificate dated eleven years after that. But since she was apparently John's new therapist, either our sister is alive or someone who knows too much about our family is loose and posing as her. I will know if you leave out information.''

''Yes. Euros is indeed one year older than you, and six years younger than me. Even as an infant she was incredibly intelligent. We were all tested, as you may imagine.'' This was directed at John. ''I was a genius, as was Sherlock, but she — she was more than a genius, incandescent. The next Einstein or Newton. Unfortunately, she was twisted. She had no conscience or compassion.''

Mycroft shifted in his chair. ''You blocked out all memory of her because of an incident when you were about three, Sherlock. Euros, you, and a neighbor child were playing outside when there was an accident. One of you broke through the cover of a disused well hidden in the woods some distance from the house. You caught Euros before she fell, but the other boy died. When the police found the well, there were signs that the cover had been deliberately broken, and suspicion fell on Euros.''

''She was four,'' said John in disbelief. Mycroft gave him a Look.

''She was preternaturally intelligent, extremely jealous of Sherlock's companionship, and displayed animosity towards all of the children who were his playmates. There had been incidents before.''

''God,'' said John. Sherlock was leaning back in his chair, staring at the ceiling.

''I have no memory of her.''

''I know, Sherlock. To continue, she developed a fascination for fire. Our parents tried to remove all sources of flames from the house, but she kept finding them. She burned the house down when she was five. She was removed after that.''

''Where did she go?'' Sherlock asked after a moment of silence.

''Sherrinford.''

''Really? I'm always skeptical of 'the ultimate prison'.''

''Prison? For a five-year-old?'' John spluttered. ''You know what, I think I'm on her side. You two do need some sense knocked into you.''

''They tried to keep her in more normal institutions, but she escaped them or destroyed them,'' said Mycroft. ''Sherrinford was a last resort. She went there when she was eleven, after she set fire to an entire complex and killed more than twenty of the other patients and staff. Our uncle who was caring for her told our parents that she also died, to spare them the pain of having a daughter who was a murderer, intentional or not. When I came of age, I was told about her and took over her care. She has been safely locked away for years. Whoever you saw, Doctor Watson, it could not have been Euros.''

''I beg to differ, brother dear,'' Sherlock said mockingly. ''Can you supply a recent picture of Euros?''

''Why?''

''You're the bloody British Government! Haven't you ever heard of facial recognition?'' John spluttered.

Mycroft had the grace to look embarrassed.

''She was riding the bus! Every day! For weeks on end! She has a mobile and answers it at all hours! It doesn't matter if it is your crazy sister or not, the woman is dangerous and we need to find her.''

''John's right. She shot him.'' Sherlock agreed.

''With a tranquilizer dart. One could argue that she merely wanted to scare you, Sherlock. There are many people, both friend and enemy, who might want to do that.''

Sherlock glared. ''Picture. Facial recognition software. I know you have it here.''

Mycroft sighed, accepted the thumb drive Sherlock was holding out, and plugged it into his computer. A few minutes passed and then there was a beep.

''Are you ok?'' John asked as Mycroft's face went white. Sherlock was looking smug.

''It was Euros, wasn't it?''

''Yes,'' Mycroft hissed. ''How is this possible? She is in the most secure facility in the world.''

''The Sea Devils,'' said John. ''Mrs. Hudson's been watching some old Doctor Whos with Rosie. They tried that with the Master once, and he just hypnotized the guards into working with him and built himself a nice little secure base on a nice secluded island that had a nice premade fortress on it.''

''John, that had people in rubber suits pretending to be prehistoric lizards from the wrong era,'' Sherlock complained.

Mycroft stood up. ''I should pay a visit to Sherrinford.''

''Good. I'm coming too,'' said Sherlock.

''And me,'' said John. ''If you want me.''

''It will be dangerous. If Euros has enough freedom to break in and out as she pleases, she will have some if not total control over the facility.'' Mycroft looked like he was a second away from banging his head on his desk. ''I should have gone to see her more often,'' he muttered.

Sherlock snorted. ''I solve crimes to avoid using drugs to stop myself from killing myself from boredom, and John wanted back into the war so badly he agreed to run around London being shot at by criminals and he married one of the world's best assassins. We know danger.''

''Fine. I have a helicopter here. Let's go.''

There were so many plot holes in that out-of-character mess of flashy images that is masquerading as Season 4 that I started this rewrite in a fit of rage. Then it caught my storytellers' interest, because if Sherlock decides to use common sense and a bit of human decency, most of the plot for this episode sort of falls apart. So . . . basically what you need to know for this is that Mary's alive (because I like her and killing her pointlessly to get some cheap drama in the lives of other characters is a total insult and this show's version of Mary has valuable skills that make her part of the team instead of a support group like in ACD canon) and Euros is not as bonkers and all-I-need-is-love-because-I'm-just-a-little-girl.

I'm going to post this in two categories; this first story in Sherlock and a sequel that covers more than just two conversations in Crossovers because my brain kind of ran away with me when I saw that what Euros really looked like and how she was acting was totally perfect for a certain character from another show. So, if you want to read all the way through to the crossover part, check my profile for the next story, which will hopefully be up within a reasonable amount of time after this one is complete. If not, just enjoy this story and think of the might-have-beens and interpret it however you like. I wrote it so it could stand on its own as a kind of thought experiment in more coherent conversations than were shown in the episode.

(Sorry for the rant. I'm just very, very angry and disappointed that I waited three years for this. Argh.)

Actually, the only thing I really loved about this season was seeing Bad Wolf Bay again. Anybody else spot it? :)