Mr. Cellophane
A/N: The idea for this came from listening to a song from Chicago and a dare. I usually don't write slash, but this idea has been floating around for a while. Based Mr. Cellophane, a song from Chicago. My first slash, so be gentle! R&R!
Cellophane, Mr.
Cellophane
Should'a been my
name, Mr. Cellophane.
'Cause you can
look right through me,
Walk right by me
And Never know I'm
there.
Peace and quiet. I don't get a lot of it around here so each time I do I revel in it. I thank the god I no longer believe in for those short, sweet little breaks. It's such a rare commodity, especially living with Lupin. But he wasn't here. No one was.
Looking back, I could have done anything with my free time. I could have gone outside and practiced shooting. Laundry had been piling up. I could have drank myself into oblivion. I even had a secret pot stash upstairs, but I decided against it. Instead, I decided to light up a cigarette, stretch out on the couch with my hat over my eyes and take a nap. Yeah, I do that a lot when the others are around, but you try to sleep when 3 other people are screaming at each other. I smoked the cigarette to relax a little, first. No, I'm not dumb enough to fall asleep with a lit cigarette in my mouth. A friend of my father's died that way. Took the house with him straight to hell. Stupid way to die. As smoke filled my lungs I felt the tension flow from my body and my mind open.
It hadn't been an easy week. We'd gone after a man named Terry Hackwood's fortune, something a little over one billion dollars. Fujiko, of course, had to try to shaft us out of it and to make matters worse, Zenigata had one of his rare lucid periods. I don't know what was worse, watching Zenigata recover the loot or watching Fujiko shove her chest into Lupin's face. I really, really hate that bitch.
I didn't start out hating her, of course. Like any man, at first I was…attracted to her. I'd had my fantasies, largely fueled by her seductive attitude. I'll admit, in the beginning when she offered herself I'd had my fun, but she sold Lupin out before I could make any really serious mistakes. After a while of watching her sell us out constantly, all desire I had for her and transformed into contempt. Anyway, my desires had taken a…weird turn lately. For a few years now, I'd been looking less and Fujiko and other women. That's to be expected, though. Women can't be trusted. They always have another agenda. No, for years my attention has been drawn to Lupin.
The man is brilliant, no question about it. Stupid, but brilliant. I'd been noticing more and more how kind he could be, how he honestly did care about Goemon and me, at least as close friends. Even Zenigata. He would give his life for any of us, but he would never need to. He could always find a way out. I repaid him for all he'd done for me with my undying loyalty and my… it would be a mockery to call it love. He would never return it, he was too stuck on Fujiko to even see my friendship, let alone my... whatever you'd call it. I am his quiet constant, beneath notice or thanks. I am invisible. So I just watch and wait, hoping he'll notice.
The front door opened, snapping me from my reverie. Footsteps were familiar, male, and not sandals. Lupin. I made no acknowledgement that I wasn't asleep. He didn't even realize I was there until he tried to sit down. "Hey!" I yelled.
"Oh, sorry buddy. Didn't see you there." Right. Tell me something I don't know. I bent my knees to give him some space to sit. He slumped into the couch with a heavy sigh. Yup, CWS. Chick Withdrawal Syndrome, and I bet I could guess the chick.
"What's the matter with you?" I asked anyway.
"I'm starting to think that Fujiko doesn't have my best interest at heart," he sighed. My heart skipped a beat, but I stayed calm.
"I could have told you that," I grumbled.
"Seriously!"
"Yeah, Lupin, seriously. Glad you finally see it."
"So, what should I do?"
"Swear off women for a while," I suggested.
"Nah, I couldn't go that long without sex."
"Who says you need women for sex?"
"Guys?" he asked. To my surprise, he became thoughtful. "I've never thought of that before. It would be different…" I shifted uncomfortably.
"It isn't bad…" I told him.
"So, wait, you're…" A grin spread across his face. "That explains a lot!"
"Once. I was drunk and depressed over a girl, he kissed me and it went from there."
"He kissed you? What was that like?" he asked curiously. I shrugged.
"Not any different from kissing a woman, really." He brightened.
"Great! Do you know where a gay bar is around here"
I snorted.
"You'll land yourself with AIDS in a week like that. It's a wonder you haven't already," I responded. "Anyway, no one just likes to be used for sex. Try finding someone you like, someone you know. And take it a little slow. You'll get about as far with a man if you walk up to him and say 'Sleep with me' as you will a woman." Maybe, just maybe, I made it clear enough. Maybe I had a chance of being noticed…
"I don't know anyone like that though! Wait, are you talking about Zenigata? I know we always joked he was gay…" he thought out loud. I stared at him. Unbelievable. After all that, he still didn't get it. I guess I shouldn't have been so surprised. I'm invisible, remember? A strip of cellophane.
"Idiot," I said, standing. Drowning myself in booze was sounding pretty good about now. I headed to my room.
"Jigen?" he called after me. He followed me into my room and kept the door from slamming like I had intended. "Jigen, what's the matter? What's up?" That's when I lost it.
"What's up? What's up?! I'll tell you 'what's up!'" I grabbed him by the lapel of his jacket and shoved him hard against the door. There's nothing he could have done to stop me, I'm bigger than him in height and mass and I'm stronger. I pressed my mouth against his roughly. Even as mad as I was, I remember how good it felt. After a few seconds I pulled away. "That's what's up," I said, my voice amazingly steady. He blinked at me a few times, then he pounced, throwing his arms over my shoulders and eagerly kissing me. Once I'd recovered from the shock, I opened my mouth and began fervently kissing him back. It felt so good, his mouth working against mine. When we broke for air, he grinned at me slyly.
"You were wrong; I think kissing a man is even better than kissing a woman!"
Earlier I compared myself to cellophane. Sometime in the subsequent kisses that came after, a thought occurred to me; you're going to notice cellophane if it wraps itself around your face.
