You love him.
You love every part of him. The way he laughs, always so quiet, but you always laugh along. The way he talks, often stuttering, as if he's unused to using his voice. But most of all his smile.
No, the way he smiles, his beautiful eyes lighting up.
His eyes. As clear as water and as blue as the sky.
Beautiful.
But they're not your eyes. No, he doesn't belong to you.
But you wish he did.
You wish you could hold him, and never let go. Wish he wanted you the way you wanted him. Wish that he hurt when he thought about how much he wanted you, like when you think about him.
But he doesn't want you.
No, he doesn't want you at all. He wants her. That cold hearted, thick-skinned bitch.
He doesn't want you at all. But you thought he did. And why wouldn't you? He always smiles around you. The only other person who can get him to smile like that is Daxter. And he always talks to you. With everyone else he chokes out one word at a time, but around you? Words seem to tumble out before he can stop them. Every little feeling, every little thought. He tells you everything. And you tell him everything in return, assuming he liked you.
But you were wrong. You just hoped he liked you. But you were wrong.
Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Why doesn't he like you? Was it because of the way you act? Sure, that stupid little "You look different," wasn't the best greeting ever, and you've been known to be a bit aggressive. But you've always been there for him. When you were young you would just sit and watch the sunset. Back then everything was easy. You two never had to worry about anything. Unless you count Daxter, but he's always been annoying.
And then you got on that rift gate.
Damn that rift. Damn it all the way to hell.
Because it took him away from you. Turned him into a stranger. Threw you into a time where nobody cares about anyone or anything. It brought you straight to hell. And took him down with you.
But you didn't change. You still can't talk to him without feeling as though you might pass out. Can't look it him without your heartbeat racing. Can't help but smile when he's happy. So why did he change? And why are you hurting?
Because of him. When he took her he must have taken your heart with him as well. There's an empty hole where your heart used to be. Your chest is throbbing, and you can't breathe. You wrap your arms around yourself and bury your head in your knees. Why is this happening? Why can't you get over it?
Because you got your hopes up. You told yourself a stupid little white lie, and now you can't take it back. And even though he hurt you, you still love him.
How stupid of you. You haven't learned at all, have you? You're still that naive little girl you were back in Sandover.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
But you still hope. You still love him.
You know deep down that he has feelings for you. He has too.
And maybe if you keep telling yourself that it will eventually come true.
Suddenly you hear a knock on your door and stand up, wrench clattering to the ground. Trying to put on a fake smile, you make your way towards the door..
You feel as though your face could shatter. But it doesn't matter. You're already numb.
But you're still hoping. Hoping that he really does love you like you love him.
Because what would the world be if nobody had any hope?
gah. had a sucky day, and needed to vent. in case u haven't figured it out, it's from Keira's POV. post jak 3.
u kno what??? sometimes i rele hate people.
~LeiaOrganicSolo
