The trip back to the Zoldyck household seemed to stretch on for a long time. No words were spoken between Amane, Canary and the Kiriko, leaving the atmosphere dull and tense. Amane, ever the silent fellow, wasn't bothered by this lack of conversation – however, her eyes would occasionally drift to her shorter companion. Canary appeared lost in thought and it showed in her pace. The frown on her face lessened only when she was asked to hurry up but would subtly settle back onto her features and show her discomfort, an act quite troubling for a butler under the employment of the illustrious Zoldyck family.
The mission they had been enlisted to take care had gone well, all things considered. There had been several uncertainties in their plans with the oldest Zoldyck sibling as an unexpected variable, but the outcome turned out satisfactory. Gon had been saved from the clutches of death, Ms. Alluka's power remained a family secret and there were no causalities involving the Zoldycks during the inner mission. The mission was over and with it, the potential threat of Killua risking the entire Zoldyck family's existence over the wellbeing of his best friend. They could rest assured, knowing that his only priority now was the protection of his sister.
Upon their close arrival at the Zoldyck estate, Amane cannot help but notice how Canary still seems rather absentminded. It was cleverly concealed but between their first introduction and Canary's current state, Amane likes to think she can spot a certain change. After their dismissal, Amane goes to walk beside her on their way to the butlers' residence. Words of consolation really weren't her forte, but she imagined anything would be preferable to this intolerable silence.
"You seem rather. . .distant," Amane says, hesitant. Were these truly comforting words, or was she just stating the obvious? "Is something the matter?"
Canary tilts her head to the side, giving Amane a vague sort of acknowledgment. "I'm alright. I suppose I'm just wondering what Master Killua will do when he finds out about Gotoh."
Ah. "I doubt he'll return home, unless he has to," Amane replied matter-of-factly. "And in the event that he should find out, it would be in his best interest to keep his emotions in check. As their employees, we butlers simply exist to serve their every need. You needn't fret, Canary."
All workers at the estate had that knowledge drilled into them from the very first day that they arrived. The words she speaks are very much true, but Amane cannot help but feel bad for saying them. She has seen firsthand how Killua deviates from his ruthless family members, how his kindness sets him apart. Heck, she is seeing right now how much Canary cares for Killua as a friend, something that is beyond a person of her station.
The trees surrounding them leave their petals scattered by the winds, their gentle rustling sounding in all directions.
Canary looks up and stares into the darkening sky, captured by the stars. "I have known Gotoh ever since I first came here," she starts, voice soft and laced with faint adoration. "He was naturally as strict as he has ever been, but he never punished me during my apprentice training – even with something as simple as carrying a straight back. I assumed it was because I was young and inexperienced."
Amane notices how their steps gradually come to a halt, both of them standing on the path point to the butlers' estate. She looks at Canary, confused at the sudden melancholy the other girl displays but doesn't speak. This seemed. . .important. A fragile moment. Amane doesn't want to ruin it.
"Gotoh once told that he came from Meteor City," Canary continues. "He told me how much I reminded him of himself – although he was much older when he came to Kukuroo Mountain seeking employment. I never – I never anticipated hearing that, but it made me happy to know. To have him share a piece of his past with me."
Amane blinks, processing everything Canary is saying. She cannot say she relates to everything she's hearing but she can empathize with it. The loss of Gotoh wears much greater on Canary than Amane could have ever imagined. She tries to wrap her head around what had just been left out in the open, feeling a rise of sudden panic welling up inside of her. Surely Canary knows that the Lady of the household could be spying on their conversation? Or anybody else for that matter. Does Canary really not care?
Perhaps that just proves how much he mattered to her.
Canary sighs and wipes her eyes with the back of her hand, turning her head from the dark depths of the starry night to look at Amane and offers her an awkward smile. "I'm pathetic, aren't I? I know what you're thinking and I apologize for my behavior. I won't mention this again."
True to her word, a vacant expression swiftly settles over Canary's features, erasing all traces of her prior vulnerability. Her posture is firm, and her eyes fall on the faraway estate as she springs into step to catch up to Amane who stood still in front of her. This was the ideal course of action, and yet. . .
"No."
Canary tilts her head to look at Amane, slight confusion written on her face. "Pardon me?"
"You're not pathetic," Amane says, the words spilling out from her mouth without warning. Well, weirder things have occurred today, so she may as well write this off as something brought on by the adrenaline and turmoil of the past few hours. "You did as you were told and focused on the mission at hand. Gotoh's end was unfortunate but you mustn't. . ."
The words stick to the roof of Amane's mouth, alien words that are strangely difficult to deliver despite their harmless nature.
". . .you mustn't lose faith in yourself. I may not have known Gotoh for long, but I believe he would have wanted you to stand tall and proud. It's not becoming for a butler of your caliber to sulk."
Amane thinks she might have said too much when Canary looks at her incredulously. Of course, who was she to offer comfort to a fellow coworker? She was always the quiet and reserved addition who stood by her grandmother; social cues weren't her forte and neither was consolation. Amane waits for the inevitable and rightful rebuttal from Canary, telling her to keep quiet about matters beyond her paygrade, but sees softness in Canary's grey eyes instead. Softness and a hint of mirth.
"That's nice of you to say."
"Yes, well," Amane dismisses before she clears her throat. "Your gloominess might reflect badly on your work performance and the missus would certainly take notice of that. I'm just being helpful."
Amane quickly realizes that that was a mistake to say.
Canary's eyes twinkle mischievously. "My, Amane, I had no idea you cared. To hear that you have my best interests in mind brings me indescribable joy," she says with unmistakable teasing in her voice. Amane bristles, her face quickly turning red.
"I do not!" she retorts hotly. "It's mere professional concern for a fellow employee, but I see that I never should have bothered!"
"You like me," Canary says matter-of-factly, matching Amane's quick pace with her own long steps.
"You wish," Amane mutters to herself, refusing to look at Canary's large smile. Her playful banter with Canary continues onwards and long forgotten is the silence, the tense mood and the unhappy thoughts.
