AN:

This is awful. I know. But I just had to write this. For teh lulz. I love Coraline enough to make fun of it. Badly.

The Wybie joke is from Metal Gear Awesome, because its the last thing i've watched and so its going in here. Its really late right now. Sorry.


Coraline Jones surveyed the grounds around her new home, The Pink Palace.

"God Ashland sucks!" She remarked, looking around at the dull landscape.

She plucked a small branch off a nearby bush and put in in-front of her like a dowsing rod.

"Time to go find that secret well my parents don't want me going to, cause i'm a REBBEEEEELLL."

She followed the pulls of the dowsing rod till-

"MEEEEEEEEEEEEOW" A voice rang out

"Holy character introduction, a Oregon mountain lion! Because that obviously sounded like Oregon mountain lion!"

Her face paled, and she ran ahead, away from the sound.

She entered a clearing.

"I found the well! This obviously won't be a plot device. I can see no way this simple, unimportant well will be a plot device in the future."

A loud thunder cut her obnoxious thoughts short, and she looked up to see a steam-punk esque motorbike speeding towards her.

"Oh my Goooooooooood!" She yelled and she ducked to the side, the motorbike missing her by inches.

The rider stopped the bike and took off his helmet. "U-uh oh..." He stuttered out.

Coraline got up, a little shaken, and turned towards him, preparing to rant.

The boy gasped, holding back a fanboy squeal. "You have blue hair! This is just like one of my Japanese animes!"

"Dude, what the eff are you talking about? You just tried to run me over with a motorcycle, and your all talking about some stupid Japanese show I don't give a crap about!"

Tears welled up in the boy's eyes. "Uuuuuu..."

Coraline rolled her eyes. "Look, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. ...That much. I'm Coraline Jones, I just moved here."

The boy shot his head up, tears instantly gone. "Hi! I'm Wybiechan! I'm love anime, don't you?"

"Uhhhhh yeah whatever. So why were you trying to freaking kill me?"

"I was bored, hee hee...ha...heh..." Wybie said, slouching his shoulders.

Coraline grimaced.

He giggled. Then his laughter became creepy, and he clutched his sides. "My Grandma locks me in the house all day, all I have is dial-up internet and a DVD boxset of Princess Tutu...Ha...He...Ha...Balet..." He pulled a tutu out of his long jacket.

"Uhhhhh-Okay then. I'm going home. To advance the plot. So I hope- AW JESUS I GOT POISON OAK!" Coraline yelled.

"I know..." Wybie giggled, putting on the tutu and dancing around giddily.

Coraline just stared. "Oooooo...Kay...I'm leaving now. I gotta go find the plot. Bye...Person."

She left the strange boy, still dancing to Swan Lake.


AN: I'm sorry.