Birthday
"Wake up child!" called Tulla's shouts from across the room, "you can't be missing your birthday now, can you?"
Siobhan didn't want to move, if today was her birthday then she should be able to do what she wanted.
"Up, now." Tulla's voice shouted again.
Siobhan felt the covers being pulled off of her and then the cold of the room hit her like a ton of bricks. She shivered in reaction to the quick temperature change.
"Tulla." Siobhan groaned, groggily. She grabbed blindly for the warm sheets, but only found cold thin air. She didn't feel like opening her eyes to find them, not yet.
"Must I get your mother?" Tulla chided.
"Why did Tulla, her lady's maid, have to bring her mother into this." Siobhan thought. It wasn't that she didn't want to see her mother; it was that her mother was as strict as the priest in the higher church. Her father however was the complete opposite. He was kind to both his family and the people he governed over. Her father had been the Earl of Drogheda, in Ireland for many years and continued a long governance.
Drogheda was a small town and was divided by a river which led to the Irish Sea. A castle sat on its bank and it had been Siobhan's home since she had been born.
"I will go fetch her!" Tulla threatened.
Siobhan heard the soft crackle of the fire being lit in the fireplace and the wave of heat that followed, which caused her to shiver as the heat slowly saturated her bones. The warmth was good. She finally gave up on sleeping when Tulla began physically pulling her off the bed by her ankles.
"Alright, I will get up!" Siobhan yelled, as her feet dangled over the edge of the bed.
She scooted the rest of the way off the bed before Tulla could pull her off any further.
"Now was that so hard?" Tulla grinned, placing her hands on her hips.
"Yes." Siobhan pouted.
The two girls laughed and Tulla helped Siobhan to get undressed. She then brought a new dress from the closet and presented it for inspection. It was a dark green dress and the fabric looked heavy and itchy.
"Is it to your liking?" Tulla asked, watching Siobhan's gaze.
"Just put it on me." Siobhan sighed.
Even if she didn't like it she wouldn't have been given another choice anyways. That was one thing she hated about being an Earl's daughter, she wasn't allowed to do anything for herself.
Once she had been wrestled into the dress and felt like she had gained a couple hundred pounds, she was then forced to squeeze her feet into the most uncomfortable pair of shoes possible.
"No one mentioned about getting tortured on my birthday." Siobhan muttered through gritted teeth as her hair was forcefully brushed and braided.
She stood and pain shoot up her legs as she felt her feet spasm from the overly tight shoes.
"Why did beauty have to be so painful?" Siobhan thought to herself. "Couldn't she be like the corn maidens and run around with bare feet, not a care in the world, and beauty well beyond her own."
Siobhan's mother had hoped for the quintessential Irish girl. Red hair, thin, tall and a few freckles. What she received was what she considered an insult, a girl who inherited her father's brown hair and blue eyes. Siobhan was tall, but to call herself thin would have been delusional. Somehow she managed to eat next to nothing and yet still remain the size she was. Siobhan loved her curves, her mother did not. Her mother had tried everything from potions to druid prayers and even animal sacrifices, but to no avail. Her father had accepted her appearance long ago but her mother still held on to her resentment. As for the freckles, she had none of those either, in fact her skin was as pale as a ghost. She wasn't surprised if the legends that the castle was haunted were a result of her.
The reason for her pale complexion was the fact that her mother never let her venture out of the castle, not even into the courtyards. Siobhan continually promised and reminded herself that she would never do the same thing to her own children.
"Your father and mother are in the dining hall waiting for you." Tulla's voice echoed through Siobhan's thoughts.
She jumped at Tulla's touch on her shoulder and her feet began to spasm again in protest.
Siobhan made her way slowly through the stone hallways that were carpeted and covered with tapestries, which led from her room to the dining hall. She didn't even notice the tapestries anymore, as she had passed them so many times. Siobhan reached the large wooden doors that lead into the dining hall and the guard opened them silently making no eye contact, they never did.
"Siobhan!" her father exclaimed, as he stood from where he had been sitting to greet her.
Siobhan crossed the heavily carpeted room until she was face to face with him.
"Father." Siobhan replied, smiling.
She heard her mother's all too familiar corrective cough at the reply she had made. It was first names only now that she was no longer a child. It had been years and she still hadn't gotten use to it.
"Aden." Siobhan said, correcting herself and bowing low.
"Better." her mother's voice whispered, slowly drifting across the room.
"Aisling." Siobhan spoke, turning in her mother's direction and forcing a smile.
Siobhan's father motioned for her to stand across from her mother and so she did as such. She folded her hands in front of her and looked from her father to her mother and back to her father. She could read her father's face well, they were about to tell her something. She bit her tongue to keep herself from speaking as her mother would not take to it kindly. One of her mother's many rules was that a woman always held her tongue, not that her mother followed her own rules of course. Siobhan's father cleared his throat and looked at her.
"Siobhan, we have some news." her father began.
There was a long silence and all Siobhan could hear was her own heart frantically beating.
"I am with child." her mother's voice continued, finally breaking the silence.
Siobhan stood in shock, she couldn't think, let alone speak.
"Why had they waited 20 years before they had tried to conceive again?" Siobhan thought to herself as she tried to search for the right words to say.
"I'm very happy for you." Siobhan finally said smiling, though the smile was a mask to the emotion that was now ragging in her mind.
"The priests say it will be a boy" her father explained, his face shining.
"So that was why." Siobhan thought, finally understanding her parent's reasoning.
Unlike most of the common people who now inhabited the area, Siobhan and her family still believed in the old ways. So if the druids had told her parents the time was now right to have a boy, it would happen. Her father would have been waiting for a proper heir to his title. That was the only reason Siobhan still lived in the castle at her age. Her mother had tried to marry her off many times but her father had argued against it, not wanting to risk losing the title to another bloodline. However, now that there was a male heir, she was left as a pawn to be played however her parents wished. This last part was what made her fume. The last thread of hope that she could one day make her own decisions had vanished.
"So what will happen to me?" Siobhan asked, but she regretted speaking as soon as she had spoken.
"Hold your tongue; you have been nothing but a burden to me and your father since the day you were born. Finally something good happens and all you think about is yourself. Have your father and I taught you nothing?" Siobhan's mother shouted, with tears filling her eyes.
"You have taught me well Aisling." Siobhan replied, turning away from her mother's gaze.
The hate in her mother's eyes ripped through her insides like a thousand knives.
"You may leave now." her father said sternly, turning to comfort her mother.
"My love, you must calm yourself or you will harm the child." he whispered to her mother, gently pressing her into a chair.
He turned and glared when he saw that Siobhan had not yet left.
"Siobhan, you are dismissed." he repeated, this time it was more of an order.
Siobhan couldn't move, if she did move, she was sure that her heart was going to shatter into an infinite number of pieces.
"What is wrong with you?" her father growled, coming within inches of her face.
"Nothing." Siobhan said choking on the word, as the tide of emotions she was holding back began to surface.
"Then go, or are you disobeying me?" he replied, his face reddening with continued aggravation.
"I have the same choice as you to stand here." Siobhan whispered under her breath, trying to relieve some of the emotion she was holding, it was being to give her a headache.
She knew her father had heard her when she felt his hand make hard contact against her cheek.
"How dare you!" his voice yelled, cracking in anger.
Siobhan remained where she stood in complete shock.
"This was not like her father at all." she thought, "what had changed him? Had her mother's influence finally got the better of him?"
Siobhan's father held his ground and so did she. If she had received one thing from her mother it was her strong will. If her father wanted to ruin her birthday, along with her mother, then she would let him. She wasn't going to let her parents win the fight so she turned and walked to one of the large windows that lined the far side of the room and gazed outside, she would play stubborn for as long as she could.
The sun momentarily peaked out through the clouds and Siobhan felt her face be bathed in sunlight. She pictured herself running through wide grassy fields and that the stinging sensation that still touched her cheek was the result of the warm sun tanning her skin.
Siobhan's feet began to spasm again and the resulting pain brought her back to the cold reality that was her life. It was even colder as the result of her father's quick change of heart.
"Come." one of the guards said gruffly, taking Siobhan's arm before she could resist.
His hold on her arm tightened as she struggled against him.
"Am I to become nothing but an outcast?" Siobhan thought as the emotions she had been holding finally overflowed in a downpour of tears.
When she was returned to her room Tulla was there waiting. Siobhan wonder how long she had been gone, it could hardly haven been noon.
As soon as the guard released Siobhan's wrist she collapsed to the floor, her legs finally giving way. Her cheek hit the wood floor with a soft "thud" that echoed through her head, amplifying the headache that had already taken residence there. The floor smelled of peat and burned wood, and there was a thin film of dust that covered its entirety. Siobhan didn't move. She was exhausted both mentally and physically, her mind was completely blank.
She laid there motionless for what seemed like hours. Tulla only came near her to remove her shoes, other then that she completely ignored her, either out of fright or pity. When Siobhan finally felt the strength return to her legs and the rest of her body, the sun had almost set. She didn't realize how hungry she had been till the pain in her stomach overpowered the pain in her head.
She rang for Tulla and climbed under the covers of her bed. Tulla brought her a bowl of soup from the evening meal, but its heat did nothing to warm her. She felt as if her blood had lost all its warmth with her father's change, her heart had no reason to feel anymore. Tulla took the bowl from her when shad finished.
"You are ice cold!" Tulla gasped when their fingers brushed.
"I'm fine." Siobhan replied not feeling like having company, she just wanted sleep.
"I got you a little something." Tulla replied handing her a small package, having ignored Siobhan's hint at not wanting to talk.
Tulla had her own way of being kind and loving. Today she was the only bright point Siobhan saw in her future. It had been her father, but things had drastically changed.
"Happy 20th." Tulla smiled, staring at Siobhan till she began to open the package.
Siobhan struggled with undoing the ribbon that held the package together. Her hands had given up wanting to function, so Tulla took the package from her and opened it herself. The plain paper fell open and revealed a small silver bracelet. It was intricately detailed with horse shoes and the trinity.
"No matter what ever happens, always remember Ireland." Tulla murmured, as she fastened the clasp around Siobhan's wrist.
"Thank you." Siobhan whispered, as she fought back another surge of tears that was beginning to surface.
"I'll leave you now." Tulla whispered getting up from her place across from Siobhan on the bed.
She crossed the room and poked at the fire one last time for the night. She then tied up her long brown hair into a bun and left the room with a click of the door. The room feel into an eerie silence except for the beating of Siobhan's own heart that counted away the seconds.
She believed she understood how the prisoners must feel before being hung for their wrong doings. There own heart beats counting away the seconds till their death. Her own had arrived with her father's hand.
The blankets that covered her didn't feel like the same protective cocoon they use to. It seemed like there just weren't enough layers between her and the hate that came from all sides. She fingered the cold metal of the bracelet that Tulla had given her and let her tears finally flow more freely, their warmth running down her cheeks.
"Please let me remember Ireland, but none of this place." Siobhan prayed in her heart as she hoped that the god and goddess heard her.
