Hey guys! This story doesn't belong to me, it's owned by a friend of mine but he gave the story to me after he decided to take his account down. So if you've read it before, you can stay and reread or exit, I don't really care. . . :/
I've gone through and made some major edits so that the story is easier to read, just so you know.
WARNINGS!: Self-harm, suicidal thoughts, feels and possible triggers, rape. Character Death.
For the past several days, Sugawara Koshi had been off his game. He seemed strangely depressed or down. It wasn't going unnoticed by the team, but the one that it concerned the most was Sawamura Daichi. It was Thursday afternoon, during practice. The entire week, Suga had been acting out of character; strangely quiet, nervous, and even jumpy at times. That Monday, Suga had been missing from school almost half the day. When he showed up at last, he looked as though he'd been through something rough. Daichi wanted to know what had happened to him. Because it must have been something bad enough for Suga to act the way he was.
It was extremely concerning, and Daichi was the one who was most worried about him. He so desperately wanted to know what had happened. Today, when Suga was distancing himself from the rest of the team and was sticking to one corner of the gym, Daichi decided that it was time to ask him what was wrong. Walking up to him seemed difficult, because Daichi felt a little afraid of the outcome, what Suga's answer would be.
"Suga?" Daichi said. Suga jumped at the sound of his voice.
"Oh, Daichi ..." Suga glanced over his shoulder momentarily before looking down at the ball in his hands again.
"Suga, are you alright?" Daichi asked.
Suga turned around slightly, his brow furrowed in confusion. "What ... What do you mean?" he asked, clearly confused.
Daichi sighed as the rest of the team took no notice of what was going on between the two of them and went on with their individual practice. "You haven't been acting yourself lately. What's wrong?" Daichi asked, making the question sound more clear.
Suga closed his eyes tightly. When he opened them again, they had a sad expression in which Daichi was a little startled by. Was Suga ... depressed? Now he was really worried. But he couldn't be too sure.
"I ..." Suga started, his voice trailing. He shook his head before continuing. "I don't know." he said at last.
"What do you mean you don't know?" Daichi urged. Suga flinched at his unintentionally harsh tone. "S-Sorry." Daichi apologized, his voice quiet.
Suga looked away from him and at the wall. "I ... don't really want to talk about it." Suga said. "What happened on Monday." he added.
Daichi blinked at him. So, something had happened on Monday that made him start to act this way after all.
"Suga, I don't even know what happened on Monday. I won't unless you tell me." Daichi said.
The skin on Suga's nose wrinkled and he looked as though he were on the verge of tears. "Well, I don't exactly want to tell you anyway." he said.
Daichi's breath left him. Suga didn't want to tell him about something that was bothering him? That was definitely odd and not Suga at all.
Daichi reached out his hand to touch Suga's shoulder. When Suga felt Daichi's hand on his shoulder, however, he flinched, rather violently. Startled, Daichi snapped his hand back and looked at Suga with major worry now.
"S-Suga ... ?" he said, really concerned.
"S-Sorry, Daichi. But, I can't ..." Suga never finished his sentence, though, because horrible memories started playing through his mind.
His terrible face, his harsh and painful touch, and what he'd done. It was a nightmare to Suga to even think about it. Remembering what he'd gone through that day was so much worse.
Daichi realized that Suga just wanted to be alone, but he didn't want to leave him alone. He was worried for his friend, and he wanted to know what had happened so that he could help. He just wanted to help him, but how would Suga react to that? Daichi was now noticing the new look in Suga's eyes. It was fear. Suga was scared? Why? What had happened at the beginning of the week?
"Suga-" Daichi tried again, but Suga turned on him.
"Why are you still here?!" he demanded.
Suga's tone startled Daichi. He'd never spoken to him with it before, so it was really strange.
"Just ... leave me alone!" Suga turned away from Daichi again and moved farther into the corner and squeezed the volleyball in his hands.
Daichi huffed. He didn't care what Suga said, he wanted to know why was acting this way.
"No." Daichi said. Suga's shoulders raised.
"What is so important that you won't stop pestering me?!" he demanded, getting into Daichi's face.
Daichi stared into Suga's angry expression. "You." he stated.
"Huh?" Suga eyes narrowed in confusion.
"You are what is so important." Daichi explained. "You aren't acting your usual self, and I want to know why." he said determinedly.
Suga lowered his shoulders again and took a step back defensively. "What do you mean I haven't been acting my usual self?! I'm fine!" Suga fumed.
"Clearly you're not!" Daichi growled. He figured he was pushing it, but his concern and worry was getting the best of him at the moment. "You've never been this quiet before, and you most certainly aren't as jumpy as you have been this week." he explained.
Suga blinked at him, his expression turning to realization, but then going angry again. "You should really stop putting yourself into other people's own concerns." he said.
"You are my concern, Suga. You've been acting strangely and I want to know why. It worries me." Daichi said.
Suga huffed, annoyed. "Well ... stop." he said flatly.
Daichi blinked. "W-What?" he stammered.
"You heard me. Stop." Suga repeated.
Now Daichi was sure that something was wrong. He took a step forward, but then Suga got defensive and shoved him away. Daichi stumbled backward several feet. Suga had pushed him back with a large force that he almost fell over. Some of the others were beginning to notice what was going on and were watching with interest.
"Stay away from me." Suga said slowly, his tone hard.
Now Daichi was a little scared. Suga obviously wasn't up for anything from him, so he reluctantly turned away and left him alone.
"Are you okay, Daichi-san?" Tanaka asked.
Daichi nodded. Then the realization of what had just happened washed over him and he nearly collapsed.
"Daichi-san!" Tanaka cried, catching his captain as he fell.
Asahi ran over and helped stand him up again. "What happened between you two?" the Ace asked, casting a glance over at Suga, who was bouncing his volleyball between him and off the the wall.
Daichi panted lightly, shocked. "I ... I'm not exactly sure ..." he said. Tanaka and Asahi blinked at him. Daichi shook his head in attempts to clear it. "The only thing that I know happened is that I'm now really worried about Suga." he said, glancing back at Suga. He looked back at Tanaka and Asahi. "I still don't know what, but I'm pretty sure that whatever it was, something really bad happened to Suga on Monday while he was absent from school." Daichi said.
Tanaka looked worried now. "Something bad?" he repeated.
Daichi nodded. "I want to find out what, but I don't know how." Daichi explained.
"Well, he clearly doesn't want to tell anyone, so it might take a lot of convincing to do so." Asahi said.
Daichi chuffed. "Yeah, no kidding." he said, seeming amused. His voice was serious again when he said, "It's vital we find out what's wrong. Otherwise Suga won't get any better."
As Daichi talked with Tanaka and Asahi, Suga stopped bouncing the ball off of the wall and merely held it in his hands. He glanced over his shoulder at Daichi and the others, his eyes holding sadness within them. He turned away again and looked at the floor as a single tear fell down his cheek. He knew that Daichi just wanted to help him, but it hurt. It hurt to think about what had happened. It hurt to think about how the others would react. He knew that they were concerned and would want to get him help, but that was the thing that Suga was most afraid of. Help. It wasn't that he didn't want it, because he did, it was that he didn't know how to deal with it.
After what had happened, Suga was afraid to talk to anyone, afraid that he might end up slipping what had been done to him, so he'd decided that he wouldn't talk too much. Almost not at all. That was what was driving the others to worry for him. His ongoing silence was causing concerns, and Suga was aware of that. The only thing was, he didn't know what to do about it. He was lost in his own thoughts about many things and couldn't comprehend them most of the time. Daichi wanted to help him, but how could he? After that man had pulled Suga off the street and ... and ... no. Suga didn't want to think about it. He didn't want to think about how he'd been r-. . .
No! Suga mentally exclaimed. Don't think about! Don't think about! Don't think about it. Don't ... think ... about it ...
More tears fell from Suga's eyes as he remembered the horrible way the man had treated him, the terrible things he'd done to him. For all Suga knew, as long as kept the evidence hidden, no one should find out. Not even his parents knew. Most of his time at home, Suga spent shut up in his room, avoiding questions from his parents. Or anyone else for that matter. He ignored every phone call he'd get, every e-mail and everything else. He just sat up in his room, lying on his bed in silence. As Suga stood in the corner of the gym now, crying, he wasn't thinking of how he was rejecting everyone. He was thinking about how he was protecting them.
"Tell anyone, and I will find out. You hear me? After that, I'll do the same to them as I have to you. Got it?!"
That was the last thing the man had said before he dumped Suga in some random alleyway. If he told Daichi about what had happened to him, that man would hurt him. He didn't want that. Not only did it prevent Suga from getting help, it also prevented him from moving on. The thing was, he liked Daichi. As more than just a friend. It was a little awkward at first, realizing that he was gay, but Suga had just decided to roll with it. He was going to confess to Daichi the day he'd been raped, and then it was all taken away from him. His hope in telling his captain how he felt about him, his innocence. Gone. Just ... gone. It was too much that Suga decided to leave as soon as he could.
Finally, when the end of practice came around, Suga was actually the first one to leave. He walked home at a slow pace. Not wanting to think about any of the others catching up to him. Especially Daichi. Once Suga finally got home, he went straight up to his room. His parents were out for the night, so he had the place to himself for the time being. For several hours, Suga lay on his bed in silence, waiting. For what? Anything. His mom or dad to come home. To fall asleep. For an idea. An idea ... An idea crossed Suga's mind suddenly and he threw himself off the bed, landing on the floor with a thud. He sighed and lay there for a bit, before getting up again.
Heading to the bathroom, Suga stopped in front of the mirror. He'd never actually seen the marks that the man had left on him, only where they were and how to cover them up, so, slipping off his shirt, Suga turned around a little, and gasped. A large, yellow-ish, purple bruise was on his back, just between his shoulder blades. There were a few other marks, like scratches from when the man had cut him up with glass. The bruise looked as though it were healing, but barely at all. It also looked about three inches wide. Suga remembered what the man had done to make that mark. But he didn't want too. Turning a little more to look at his neck, Suga saw two more bruises across his nape and flinch when he touched them. The weren't bruises, they were burns. The man had taken a hot piece of metal and held against the back of Suga's neck after all, now that he thought about it.
Putting his shirt back on, Suga sat on the floor and pressed his hands into his face. He felt as though he wanted to cry, but his eyes remained dry of tears. Looking up slightly, Suga saw something glint in the corner of his eye and looked over, seeing what it was. A razor. He hesitated before getting up to collect it. As Suga stared at it, he thought about what he was thinking of doing. Suga looked back and forth between the razor and the hand holding it. Before he knew what he was doing, he'd grabbed the razor in his right hand and slowly slid it across his opposite arm. The pain didn't get to him. Either that or, he simply ignored it and kept cutting. It wasn't until he'd started pressing harder on the razor that he finally noticed the pain.
Gasping, Suga dropped the blood stained razor onto the floor and slid backwards over the tile away from it. He cradled his arm gently as he stared at the blood seeping through the cuts he'd put into it. It was starting to really hurt now, stinging painfully as the thin scratches continued to bleed. Suga stood up desperately and went over to the bathroom closet. He opened it and rummaged through its contents. Finding what he was looking for, Suga sat down on the edge of the bath tub and started bandaging his bleeding arm. The blood seeped through and stained it red, so he covered it up a little more. Cleaning up the small mess he'd made, Suga went back to his room and collapsed onto his bed again. Finally, his tear-empty eyes found their leak point and the tears slowly fell onto his bed.
It all hurt. It all hurt too much. It all hurt too much to bare and Suga just wanted it all to end. To just ... be over. But how was that going to happen?
Friday. The last day of the school week. Thank god the school uniform had long sleeved shirts. Suga could cover up the bandages on his left arm easily with the long, white sleeve. He bypassed morning practice, deciding that he didn't really feel like showing up. During class, he spaced out a lot, and then finally ended up dozing off. When he woke up, his arm stung again, and he realized that Daichi was standing next to his desk.
"What?" he mumbled, yawning.
"What? You aren't going to reject me or anything of the sort?" Daichi said.
Suga looked up at him, confused. He knew he'd done that yesterday, but now he didn't want to push Daichi away. Not today at least. "No. Why would I?" Suga said.
Daichi placed his hands on Suga's desk and looked directly into his eyes. "After what happened yesterday, I'm rather surprised that you aren't trying to." he said.
Suga rolled his eyes. He knew by now that it was lunch period, so Daichi was free to be doing what he was. "I just didn't feel like talking yesterday, that's all." Suga said. "But I still don't want you to try getting me to talk about what you trying to get me to talk about either." Suga added as Daichi opened his mouth to speak.
Daichi closed his mouth again and sighed. He pulled up a chair and sat opposite of Suga and looked into his eyes. Suga wasn't looked back at Daichi, but rather his own desk. Even so, Daichi could make out what was in Suga's eyes. He had a sad look in them and he still seemed down. He wanted to ask why, but then again, that might just make Suga mad. That wasn't what Daichi wanted to do. That wasn't what he wanted to do at all.
"Hey, Suga?" Daichi started. Suga didn't look up or say anything. Daichi sighed. "Why weren't you at practice this morning?" he asked.
Now Suga looked up. Now that he knew it was about something else, he could answer. "I ..." The only problem was, Suga didn't exactly know how to answer Daichi's question. "I wasn't up to it." he answered finally, somewhat truthfully.
"You weren't up to it? You mean you didn't feel like showing up?" Daichi checked.
Suga hesitated for a moment before he nodded.
Daichi sighed. He wanted to say that he was now really worried, but he still didn't want to anger Suga at all. Suga looked up at Daichi with sad eyes.
"But ... I'll still come to practice later, though." he said.
Daichi was a bit relieved by those words. "Okay. We're doing a match practice instead of individual." he explained.
If Daichi had looked at Suga instead of the door to the classroom, he would of noticed that Suga was nervous about what he'd said. Suga looked down at his left arm worriedly. Will he be okay for practice? Or will his arm cause him pain? Hopefully, Suga would be able to go along with it.
However, when practice came that afternoon, Suga hesitated before entering the gym. As he stood outside, he didn't realize that Hinata had come up behind.
"Suga-san?" he said.
Suga jumped. "Oh, hey, Hinata." he said, able to breathe again.
"Is everything alright?" Hinata asked.
Suga looked at him for a moment. "Yeah." he lied.
Hinata seemed convinced, though, and he ran inside the gym. Suga followed after him. Then he realized a problem; the jersey's didn't have long sleeves. How was he supposed to hide the bandages? He might have to come up with an excuse as to why they were there, or why he wasn't wearing the gym uniform. And he would have to do that quickly. Really quickly.
As he thought, Ukai came up to him. "Sugawara," he said. Suga willed himself not to jump, and looked up at the Coach. "Can I talk to you outside for a minute?" Ukai asked. Suga nodded nervously. He followed the Coach outside, a little relieved that he didn't need to worry about the jersey issue at the moment. "Suga, is there something going on?" Ukai asked him.
Suga looked up at his Coach in confusion. "Huh?" he said.
Ukai sighed. "Don't think that I haven't been noticing your strange behavior, as well. Because I have been, and it concerns me." Ukai explained. "So, is there something going on?" he asked again.
Suga hesitated. He couldn't lie to an adult, could he? How could make Ukai believe him about something that wasn't at all true? Wait. There was something that he could use as his excuse. In fact, it was somewhat part of the reason to his incoming depression.
"Well," Suga began. "My ... my parents are getting a divorce." he said.
This was what the one thing was. It was something that could be used as an excuse, and also something he could get help with. But his other problem, he wouldn't let anyone know about.
Ukai thought for a moment. "I can see how that must be hard for you." he said. "But you know that we're here for you if you want to talk about it." he added. Suga sighed. He was starting to think that there was no avoiding it. Ukai must have noticed the look in his eyes, because he asked, "How are you dealing with it?"
It was a moment before Suga realized what he'd just asked. He looked away.
"Sugawara, I'm just concerned is all." Ukai said.
Suga's brow furrowed. "I ..." Suga began. "I didn't know what else to do." he said.
Ukai eyes grew wider by a little. "What did you do?" he demanded.
Suga hesitated before he lifted his sleeve to show the Coach the bandages.
Ukai's eyes widened fully. "Sugawara, this is serious!" he said.
Suga still refused to look him directly in the face, though. But his gaze was aimed away from the gym, so he didn't see Daichi peering around the corner of the doorway. Quickly, Daichi swung himself around and out of sight of the two outside. This wasn't what he'd been expecting. A divorce was always hard to pull through, but Daichi didn't realize that it would affect Suga as much as it was.
Cutting himself? Why would he do that? Shaking his head, Daichi moved away from the door and looked back at it sadly. He wasn't paying attention that he ran into Hinata, who was talking with Kageyama and Tanaka.
"Oh, sorry." he apologized.
"Captain?" Hinata looked at him, a little puzzled.
"Sorry, I didn't see you." Daichi quickly regretted saying that. "I didn't mean it that way! I just wasn't paying attention to where I was going." he corrected himself.
He'd probably almost offended Hinata with what he'd said the first time, since he could have taking that as he was short. Which he was, even though Nishinoya was the shortest one on the team.
"Is something bothering you?" Kageyama asked.
"Huh?" Daichi looked at the setter. "W-Why would something be b-bothering me? I don't know w-what you're talking about!" Daichi laughed nervously.
Tanaka raised and eyebrow. "Okay, there is definitely something bothering you. Spit it out, Daichi-san." Tanaka said, crossing his arms.
Daichi sighed. "I just discovered what's wrong with Suga." he said.
Tanaka's eyes widened. "Seriously?!" he gasped.
"Apparently his parents are getting a divorce and he'd taking it a lot harder than anyone I've known going through that situation." Daichi explained.
"Well, it can affect people differently. I mean, look at me. I managed my parents' divorce a lot easier than I though I would." Hinata said.
"Your parents are divorced?" Daichi looked at Hinata.
This was new information. Hinata shrugged.
"Have been for five years." Hinata explained.
Suddenly, Daichi had an idea, and Tanaka seemed to realize it.
"Wait, Daichi-san, you're not thinking what I think you are, are you?" he asked, a little nervous. He reached out for Hinata and pulled him closer.
Hinata looked up at Tanaka in confusion. "What? What is he thinking?" Hinata's gaze shifted to Daichi. "Captain?" he tilted his head a little to the right.
"Maybe you could help." Daichi said.
"With what?" Hinata asked.
"With Suga." Daichi explained quickly. "You've gone through a divorce before, so maybe you could help Suga get through his?" Daichi suggested.
"W-What?!" Hinata gasped. "I-I don't know ... I mean, you did say that Suga-san is taking it harder than anyone you-" Hinata paused.
Tanaka, who had been looking at Hinata, now looked at his captain. "Just how hard is Suga taking this?" he asked worriedly.
Daichi sighed. "He showed Coach his arm. It had bandages on it. I think ... I think Suga's been cutting himself." Daichi explained sadly.
Tanaka freaked. "W-What?! Seriously?! Oh man! That's serious!" he exclaimed.
Daichi held his hands out to try to calm Tanaka down. "I know it is, which is why I'm worried." he said.
Hinata looked unsure about what Daichi had suggested earlier. Daichi, Kageyama, and Tanaka all looked at the decoy. When Hinata realized that they were all looking at him, he jumped back a step or two. "I-I don't know if I can do this, though!" he exclaimed. "I mean, I did say that I pulled through it easily. Didn't I?" Hinata's hands were suddenly shaking nervously.
"You did, but you still went through the same situation." Daichi said.
"What's going on over here?" Asahi came up to the group of four.
"We're trying to figure out how to help Suga-san." Kageyama explained.
"Help him? With what?" Asahi asked curiously.
"His parents' divorce." Tanaka explained.
"What?! Is that's what's been causing him to act the way he has lately?" Asahi asked worriedly.
"We think so." Hinata said.
Daichi shook his head. "It's a serious issue for him if he's been cutting himself over it." he said.
Asahi was startled. "C-Cutting himself?!" he gasped.
Daichi nodded. "With new information, I'm only more worried about him." he sighed.
Hinata then realized something. "Wait, how are we supposed to help Suga-san with his parents' divorce if he thinks that none of us know about it?" he pointed out.
This was in fact a problem that even Daichi hadn't thought of. "Good point, Hinata." he praised.
Hinata raised his shoulders a little and smiled nervously.
"We'll have to come up with a fool-proof plan if we're to help Suga." Asahi said.
"The way he acted towards you yesterday," Kageyama put in. "I'm guessing you were asking Suga-san what was bothering him?" he asked.
Daichi nodded.
"He rejected your efforts, though. I'm thinking that if we just tell him you eavesdropped, he might just get angry." Kageyama finished.
Hinata and Tanaka looked at him in surprise.
"Wow, Kageyama! That's probably the smartest thing I've ever heard you say!" Hinata said.
An anger mark appeared on Kageyama's forehead. "What was that, dumbass?!" he grabbed Hinata's head with one hand.
"Ouch, Bakayama! That hurts!" Hinata protested.
"Kageyama has a point." Daichi said, ignoring the two. Tanaka and Asahi looked away from Kageyama, who was still holding Hinata's head as the orange haired first year desperately struggled to escape his grip. "We have to think this through carefully." Daichi crossed one arm over his chest and held his chin with his other hand, thinking.
It was then that Coach Ukai and Suga came back inside the gym. As Daichi thought, he realized he could hear Ukai speaking. He looked behind him and saw that the Coach had come back inside, and Sugawara with him. For some odd reason, Suga looked relieved of something. Daichi looked at Asahi and Tanaka, who only gazed back at him with the same expression. Kageyama had stopped trying to crush Hinata's head and had his back turned on the decoy, who seemed to be trying to get his attention again.
Ukai was talking with Takeda, and Suga was watching him quietly. Daichi looked back at his friend, and he hesitated.
"Daichi, this might not be a good idea." Asahi said.
Daichi looked back at the Ace. "But it's the only other thing we've got. What else is there we can do?" he asked.
Asahi fell silent with thought.
"Unless there's something else you've got in mind, I'm going." Daichi said before he turned around and started walking over to Suga. "Suga?"
Suga flinched a little at the sound of Daichi's voice, but he turned to face the captain. "Daichi," he began. "I'm sorry about yesterday, I-"
Daichi stopped him by holding his hand up. "No, it's fine." he said.
Suga's shoulders lowered as some tension was released.
"Sorry, but I kind of eavesdropped on you and Coach." Daichi admitted.
Suga's eyes went blank. "W-What?!" he gasped.
"I apologize for it, but I knew that you would have to tell Coach, so I wanted to listen in to see what was up." Daichi explained. Suga heaved a sigh. "What did he tell you?" Daichi asked.
"What to do about it, really. Who I could talk to about it, I guess." Suga said.
"Did he say that Hinata was an option?" Daichi asked.
Suga looked at him with puzzlement. "What do you mean? How is Hinata part of this?" Suga asked.
So Daichi explained, "His parents are divorced. I thought that maybe he could give you some tips or something like that."
Suga blinked at him. Hinata's parents were divorced? Was Hinata just keeping that to himself because he didn't want anyone to know, or was it because it wasn't important? Either way, this was new info about the first year.
"Does he know about your idea?" Suga asked, making sure.
"Yes, after he mentioned it, I got the idea." Daichi confirmed.
Suga thought for a moment. "H-How much did you overhear?" he asked nervously. He hoped Daichi hadn't seen his arm.
Daichi figured this just by Suga's voice, so he pretended he didn't know about the cutting. "Nothing else really. Just that your parents are getting divorced. After I heard that, I wanted to figure out what to do about it." Daichi said.
Suga sighed, relieved. So Daichi didn't know. But how could he be sure he wasn't lying? It didn't seem to matter right now.
There was another person Suga could go to for help, and that person was someone Suga had never thought would be an option. He glanced over at Hinata, who had given up on trying to get Kageyama's attention and was now talking with Nishinoya.
"I'll ... I'll think about it." Suga said finally.
Daichi nodded. He left Suga to himself and went back over to Asahi and Tanaka.
"Well?" Tanaka asked.
"He took it rather well." Daichi said. "He said he would think about getting Hinata's help." he explained.
"So, Hinata might not have to do anything?" Asahi wondered.
Daichi shook his head. "It all really depends on what Suga wants." he said, looking back at the other boy.
For the match, Suga didn't play. Daichi guessed that was why he'd looked so relieved earlier, and he knew that it was because of his injured arm that Coach had told him to sit out. Once practice was over, Suga thought about what Daichi had told him. Hinata could help him? He looked around for the small decoy, and found him wandering away from Kageyama.
Probably off to the bike racks, Suga thought.
He looked around once more before heading after him. "Hinata." Suga stopped the first year.
Hinata turned around and saw Suga. "Suga-san?" he said wonderingly.
Suga hesitated for a moment, then he said, "Daichi told me your parents got divorced."
Hinata was puzzled, then he realized what Suga might have wanted. "Oh! You want tips, I'm guessing?" he asked, thinking he sounded a little stupid.
Suga looked up at him. "I didn't even know that you'd gone through that sort of thing." he said.
Hinata nodded. "Yeah, I usually keep quiet about it. It isn't a bother to me now as it was then. Unless something related pops up, I don't really tell anyone about it." he explained.
Suga started walking with Hinata to the front of the school where the bike racks were.
"How did you get through it?" Suga asked finally.
Hinata seemed to have to think about his answer. "Well, my sister Natsu and I mostly spent our time together and avoided out parents. But otherwise I just distracted myself from the problem with something else." he said finally.
"Distracted yourself?" Suga repeated.
Hinata nodded. "It worked surprisingly well. I knew what was going on between mom and dad, and as I drove my attention away from it, I slowly started to accept the outcome." he said.
Suga thought about this.
"Do you have any siblings?" Hinata asked him suddenly.
"Huh? No." Suga shook his head.
"Oh," Hinata looked forward again.
"I think I'll try to do what you did." Suga said.
Hinata looked at him again. "Daichi said that you were going taking it harder. I managed pretty easily, though." Hinata explained.
Suga nodded the confirm. "Yeah, surprisingly." he said.
"It might be because you've had both your parents this whole time. Mine got divorced a couple years ago, so ..." Hinata's voice trailed off as he could no longer think of what to say anymore.
"Well, thanks, Hinata. I'll try it." Suga said.
Hinata gave a quick nod. "Yeah, okay." he said.
That night, Suga's parents started arguing again, mostly about which one of them would stay here and who would leave, so he tried to distract himself like Hinata had. To his surprise, it worked shockingly well.
Over the weekend, Suga still kept himself locked away in his room. He'd already done all his homework, and spent most of Saturday asleep. When he could no longer lay around being lazy, he finally got up to get something to eat. The house was surprisingly quiet, and it felt a little uncomfortable to Suga. After he'd eaten, he thought that he would head out. To where exactly, he didn't know. He guessed just for a walk. But then again, that man might be following him, keeping an eye out. How else would he know if he'd told someone about what happened? It was the only logical reason. So, against his boredom, Suga stayed home the whole weekend. He didn't leave for Saturday practice, either.
When Monday came around again, Suga kept looking around him nervously as he made his way to school. He wasn't paying attention to where he was going and almost got hit by someone on a bike.
"WHOA!" they cried, skidding to a stop several yards away. "Suga-san! I'm sorry! Are you alright?" Hinata's voice spoke.
"Oh, Hinata!" Suga hadn't been expecting to run into the orange haired decoy like he had that morning. "Yeah, I'm fine." he said.
Hinata didn't keep going, but he waited for Suga to walk up beside him. "Sorry, I wasn't watching my speed." Hinata apologized.
"That's fine. I mean, you didn't run into me at all." Suga said.
"Yeah, I guess not." Hinata said.
He jumped off his bike to walk with Suga the rest of the way to school.
"H-How was your weekend?" Suga asked, trying to start a casual conversation. He didn't know why he suddenly wanted to talk with anyone.
Hinata shrugged. "Hmm, eventful I guess." he said.
"Mine was quiet." Suga admitted.
"D-Did I help at all?" Hinata asked.
"Huh?" Suga didn't know what he was talking about for a second before he realized. "Oh, yeah. I tried doing what you'd done, and it worked pretty well, I guess." he said.
"Hmm," Hinata looked forward. They walked in silence for a while before Hinata brought something else up. "I ... this might seem like a bit of a random question," he began. Suga looked at him curiously. "But, if you liked someone, how would you tell them?" Hinata looked to Suga expectantly.
"I-If I liked someone?" Suga repeated.
"What would you do about it?" Hinata asked again.
Sugawara thought for a moment. "I ... I don't know. Why? Is there someone that you like at all?" he asked Hinata.
It became obvious when the boy's face turned pink lightly.
"Okay, who is it?" Suga pressed.
Hinata's face turned from light pink to red. "I-I can't tell you! It's embarrassing!" he exclaimed. His face returned to normal color. "Do you like someone?" Hinata asked Suga.
"Yeah, but like you, I'm not going to say who it is." Suga said bluntly.
Hinata rolled his eyes in amusement. "Yeah, yeah, whatever." he said. "But, that doesn't exactly say what you would do. How you would tell them." he pointed out.
Suga sighed. "I'm not sure how I would confess to h-" Suga stopped abruptly.
He'd almost said him, having stopped where he did, Hinata might go on thinking that he'd been about to say her, instead of him.
Suga was fine with that. Perfectly okay. It was a little embarrassing to him just thinking about someone else on the team finding out he was gay. Apart from Daichi, of course, whom he liked. Hinata didn't ask any further about what Suga had been about to say.
"What do you think you would do?" Suga asked Hinata.
Hinata thought for a moment. He shrugged. "It's ... a little difficult; trying to think of a way to tell them." he admitted.
Suga was trying to think of a reply when another familiar voice called out, "Suga-san! Shoyo!"
Hinata and Suga looked up to see Nishinoya waving to them.
"Noya-san!" Hinata called back. He walked a little faster to reach him quickly, but Suga remained at his pace.
Nishinoya and Hinata were talking about something that he couldn't make out until he got closer.
"So, have you figured it out?!" Nishinoya asked excitedly.
Hinata shook his head. "It's too difficult." he said. "I just can't figure out how to get past the boss." he explained.
Boss? Suga wondered.
What were they talking about exactly?
"Aw man!" Nishinoya exclaimed. "I was hoping you would have gotten past the level, because I'm stuck on it as well." he said. "The game's just too hard." he added, complaining.
Oh, so they were talking about some kind of video game. It wasn't a concern of Suga's, though, so he moved on. He skipped morning practice again, not willing to risk being caught with the scratches on his arm. For some reason, he'd been tempted to start cutting himself again, but he'd been forcing himself to ignore the urge. It wasn't because of the divorce issue going on between his parents, it was because of his other problem.
Hiding the fact that he'd been raped was beginning to become a great burden to Suga, and it hurt to hide the secret. It had happened a full week ago, and he still hadn't told anyone. It hurt so much, hiding the secret from everyone. He'd been able to get help with the divorce issue, and was still looking into that, but for the rape, he wasn't even sure what the others would think of him now. Now that it had been a full week, he wasn't sure how they would react if he told them now. So, despite how much he didn't really want too, Suga continued to keep quiet. He managed to pay attention for the first time in a while in class, and at lunch he ran into Takeda in the hallways.
"Oh, Sugawara-kun. I was just looking for you." Takeda said.
"Huh? You were?" Suga said, puzzled.
"Yes, can you come with me, please?" Takeda asked him.
Suga nodded and followed him into an empty classroom. They sat down at two desks and Suga had a rough idea of what this was about.
"Ukai-kun told me about what you'd told him on Friday." Takeda began. Suga looked up at him, a little sadness showing in his eyes. "He also said that you'd been cutting yourself?" Takeda asked worriedly.
Suga hesitated for a moment before he gave a small nod.
Takeda sighed. "If there is any way that I can help, I'll be willing to do so." he said.
It was perfectly sensible for the others to be concerned about him during the divorce, but it was starting to become a bit of a nuisance for Suga, how they were trying to talk to him about getting help.
However, over the course of the rest of the day, the thought about what Takeda had told him during lunch relayed in Suga's mind several times over. Having decided to just not show for practices, Suga started for home once school ended, and on his way there, he saw of piece of broken glass on the ground. Several pieces of broken glass, actually. And a damaged window frame. Broken window. Huh. Suga looked around before bending over to pick up one the shards and looked at it. The edges were pretty sharp, and Suga had to hold it very carefully in order not to cut himself. He continued walking, all the while holding the broken glass in his hand. It wasn't very big, about the size of his thumb.
Suga's phone suddenly started ringing, and when he looked at it, he saw it was Daichi calling. Suga rolled his eyes and actually ignored it for once. He slipped his phone back into his pocket, and that's when the glass cut him.
"AH!" Suga gasped as his hand tingled with pain.
He didn't drop the shard, but his eyes saw something red covering one of the sharp edges. Blood. He was now bleeding from his hand. First his arm, and now his hand. Suga quickly closed the distance between him and home. He closed his bedroom door behind him and was suddenly slashing the glass over the palm of his hand. It stung painfully, and when Suga's palm was almost completely covered in blood, he finally dropped the glass and fell to his hands and knees, keeping his left hand off the floor. The blood dripped onto the carpet, staining it red, and making evidence for someone to go off of.
It angered Suga so much, how everyone was concerned and worried for him. He wanted to just tell them the truth about what had happened. About what had been done to him, but he was still afraid too. That man would hurt them if he told anyone. Wait. There was Ukai and Takeda. They were adults, and then there was always the police. The police. Why hadn't Suga thought of that before?! It was so obvious that he hadn't though of the idea! But ... if Suga told the police, the man might just come and kill him.
Kill him. Death. It was crazy, but it was actually a way to keep the others from finding out about what had happened to him. And with that, it was also a way to protect them. His parents were always fighting and arguing, and now that his mom had finally decided to be the one to move out, Suga's dad was constantly depressed or drunk all the time. He never paid any attention to his son anymore, so what was the point. Suga had never thought of committing suicide before, and if he did, he wouldn't just be protecting his friends, he would be ending the pain of knowing that he'd been raped by someone who does it for pure fun. Isn't that what rape is, though? Forced sex for fun? At least, for the one doing it, not for the victim. That was obvious.
"I can't do this anymore ..." Suga sobbed, the red stain on the floor being joined by wet tear marks.
Suga let himself fall over onto his side and he clutched the broken glass in his bleeding hand again, squeezing it as if he were trying to break it into even smaller pieces.
The sharp edges cut into his skin, but Suga didn't care. He didn't give a damn about the pain he was causing himself, or how he might end it all quickly. All Suga cared about, was putting a stop to the terrible memories of a week ago behind him, just getting rid of what had happened, just ... Tears streamed from Suga's eyes and down his face, dripping onto the carpeting. He curled himself up into a ball of sorts and started sobbing. That was when his phone started ringing again. This time Suga picked up.
"What?" he said, able to hide the fact that he was crying.
"Suga? Where are you right now?" Daichi's voice asked.
"I went home." Suga answered.
"Are you alright?" Daichi asked.
Suga hated hearing the sound of worry in Daichi's tone. "I'm fine." he said, his voice cracking. His nose was becoming uncomfortably runny and Suga sniffled.
"Are you ... crying?" Daichi asked, now sounding confused.
"No," Suga lied, his voice deepening with sadness.
"Okay, yeah. You're crying. Why are you, Suga?" Daichi demanded.
"I said I'm not!" Suga protested.
Daichi fell silent. Suga exhaled, his breath shaky. "What's going on, Suga?" Daichi asked slowly.
Suga didn't answer.
"Suga?" Daichi said, sounding worried again.
"My mom left." Suga answered finally.
Daichi fell quiet again. For a moment, Suga thought that he'd left the phone and was coming over at that second, but then Daichi's voice returned with a response.
"Suga, I-I'm sorry." he said, trying to comfort him.
On the other side of the line, Daichi was wishing that he could be there to comfort Suga, but he was still at practice.
"Daichi," Suga's voice sounded uneven, and Daichi knew for sure that he was crying. But now he knew the reason why.
"Hmm?" Daichi said in the pause between Suga's words.
"Can ... can I stay the night at your place? M-My dad isn't really likely to notice my absence anyways." Suga said.
Daichi thought for a moment. "Sure. My parents are away for the next three days, so I have the place to myself." Daichi said.
"Thanks, Daichi." Suga replied.
After the phone call ended, Suga bandaged up his hand. Staying the night at Daichi's meant that he would find out he's been cutting himself. But there was another reason for wanting to be there. Suga wanted to get away from this place. He already knew where Daichi lived, since he'd been there a few times before already, and he packed a few things, leaving the shard of glass behind, along with a note for his father if he was to ever notice that he was gone.
Once in some more comfortable clothes, Suga left for Daichi's. Daichi lived quite a few miles away, so Suga took his bike to get there. He arrived before Daichi did, so Suga sat outside the house and waited. He didn't realize that he'd dozed off until he felt someone shaking him. Blinking his eyes open, Suga realized that it was now dark, and that Daichi was standing in front of him.
"Hey, sleepyhead." he teased.
Suga may have scowled at him, but there was also some amusement in his expression. "Ha ha, hilarious." he said.
Suga stood as Daichi unlocked the front door.
"How long have you been waiting here?" Daichi asked him curiously.
Suga had to think about that. He shrugged. "Don't know. A while I guess." he said.
"How come your parents aren't here?" Suga asked after a few moments.
"They've gone on a business trip. They work for the same company, so they're doing it together." Daichi explained.
"Oh," Suga said.
A reason like that made sense. Suga got his things situated in Daichi's room before coming out into the living room, only to find Daichi in the kitchen.
"You can cook?" Suga asked, perplexed.
There was a small puff of steam or smoke, Suga wasn't sure, and then Daichi sighed.
"No." He admitted.
Suga chuckled and moved in to help the captain out.
"What? And you can?" Daichi raised a brow when Suga took over for him.
"Actually, yes. I can." Suga stated. "I took a cooking class, remember?" he reminded Daichi.
"Oh, right." Daichi sweat dropped.
"What are you trying to make anyways?" Suga asked.
"Sukiyaki?" Daichi said, seeming unsure.
Suga rolled his eyes. "Then you aren't doing it right. Come on." he pulled Daichi over to show him.
He seemed amazed at Suga's skill, which puzzled Suga a little, considering he'd seen him cook before.
Once the meal was finished being made, Suga realized that Daichi hadn't asked him about his bandaged hand. Obviously the captain had noticed the wrapping, because Suga saw him eyeing it several times while they ate.
After dinner had been finished, Suga finally decided to bring it up. "Why haven't you asked about it yet?" he said as Daichi was fluffing his pillow.
"About what?" Daichi asked, looking under his arm at Suga.
"My hand." Suga raised the bandaged hand for him to see.
Daichi turned around and sat on his bed. "Because I know why already." he stated. Now Suga was confused again. "I lied to you the other day. I'm sorry I didn't say anything." Daichi started explaining. Suga lowered his arm and blinked at the captain. "I actually saw you show Coach your arm, I just didn't want to say anything because I was afraid you'd get mad at me." Daichi finished.
Suga looked at him in surprise. Daichi had been lying to him after all? That was a bit of a shocker (no sarcasm intended).
"I know you're worried about me, Daichi." Suga said. Daichi looked at him, wondering what he was getting at with his words. "And I can understand if you're really concerned about how I'm facing my dilemma." Suga went on.
"What are you trying to say?" Daichi asked him.
Suga looked down at the floor, his head lowering a little. "I ... this doesn't really have anything to do with what I'm going through, but ... there's something that I want to tell you." Suga looked up at Daichi again.
Daichi slowly pushed himself off of the bed and sat on the floor.
"Daichi, I like you." Suga admitted.
Daichi wasn't startled, though, he was relieved. He'd been feeling for Suga the same way, and had been worried himself if Suga would reject or accept his feelings. Daichi heaved a slow sigh.
"I do too." he said.
Suga blinked. Wait ... what? Did he hear Daichi right? Or was he losing his hearing as well as his sanity? Suga wasn't at all sure, but then Daichi moved closer to Suga and kissed him. For a moment, Suga's eyes widened with panic, but then he realized that something was different, and he calmed down again. This kiss wasn't anything like the harsh, forced ones that Hairoguma (the man who'd raped Suga) had given him. Daichi's kiss was sweet, and gentle.
When Daichi moved away, Suga looked into his eyes for a moment before pulling Daichi into another kiss. Suga's heart pounded with exhilaration as he and Daichi continued kissing, not parting from the others lips. Finally, though regrettably, Daichi and Suga leaned away from each other and just looked into the others eyes. Suga was so intent on what was happening now that he never saw the man in the window. It was Hairoguma, and he quickly jumped down from the tree he was sitting in to look through the window. The boy had been kissing someone else. There was going to be punishment for that. Some that would affect him permanently.
That night, neither Daichi nor Suga slept separately. They ended up sleeping next to each other on the floor, and when Daichi woke up, it was to the peaceful expression on Suga's sleeping face. After what had happened hours earlier, the two seemed unable to part. They hadn't done it, of course, though. (Sorry if you were hoping for that. For those that were hoping that they hadn't, you can relax now). They both loved each other, and that was a secret to be kept from the team for a while, or until it couldn't be hidden any longer. Daichi prepared himself for school before waking Suga up. The ashen haired third year groaned as he forced himself to get up.
There was a sleepy look in his eyes, and Suga gave a large yawn before finally actually getting up.
"Morning, Koshi." Daichi said.
That was the first time Suga heard Daichi call him by his first name, and he looked up at him from the floor with eyes full of confusion.
"What? Can I not call you that?" Daichi asked, looking down at Suga as he repacked his schoolbag.
"No, it's just that ... you've never called me that before." Suga said.
Daichi laughed lightly. "No, I guess I haven't." he said.
When Suga was finally ready to go, the two of them left the house for school. "Okay, well, I think that you shouldn't call me 'Koshi' in front of the others. They might catch on that somethings up." Suga told Daichi.
"All right." Daichi replied.
"No, I'm serious-" Suga started to think that this might lead into an argument.
"No, no. I get it. Don't call you 'Koshi' in front of the team." Daichi checked.
They had a conversation most of the way to school, and it was honestly the most that Suga had spoken to anyone in a while. After what happened last night, he felt more calm, more comfortable around Daichi. He wasn't sure about the others, and he couldn't be until he met them today. In the mean time, he felt as though his heart was racing with pure happiness at just being with Daichi. When they got to school, they found Hinata already waiting by the gym. He was alone, with a bored look in his eyes. Though the brightened when he saw Suga and Daichi approaching.
"Hey!" he called, jumping up from the steps to the gym he'd been sitting on as he waited.
"Hinata, how long have you been waiting here?" Daichi asked.
"Probably ten minutes or so?" Hinata guessed.
"Well, then you can help us out." Suga said as Daichi unlocked the gym.
The door rattled as it slid open, and then the lights flickered on when the switch was flipped. The gym was mostly empty, with only Suga, Hinata, and Daichi as the only ones in it. The three boys headed over to the equipment room and started pulling out the net and bars. They started setting the net up, and once the two posts were in place, Asahi walked in.
"Oh, hey Asahi-san!" Hinata greeted him excitedly.
"H-Hey, Hinata." Asahi said, seeming rather startled by Hinata's enthusiasm.
Asahi joined in with helping get the net in place, and once everything was done, Suga was the one to bring out the cart of Volleyballs.
"Hey, Suga-san." Hinata walked up to Suga. "How have you been?" he asked.
Suga knew that Hinata was asking how he was pulling through, and for once, Suga had an answer ready. "Great, actually. One might say better than that, even." Suga replied, casting a quick glance over at Daichi.
Hinata didn't notice the quick look, though. "That's great! Do you think you'll be up to practice this time?" Hinata asked.
Suga looked down at his hand. "I don't know. I guess we'll see." he said. He'd changed the bandages on his arm and hand that morning, so they weren't stained red with blood. At least, not enough to cause concern. "Have you done anything about your feelings, yet?" Suga asked Hinata.
"Huh?" Hinata had no idea what Suga was talking about. Then he remembered the short conversation that they'd had yesterday morning. "Oh yeah! ... No." he answered.
Suga let out an amused sigh. "Really?" he asked.
Hinata shook his head. "I still can't think of how to tell them." he said.
Suga noticed how he wasn't saying "him" or "her" specifically, but he wasn't about to ask about it.
"Hey, Suga! Can you come here?" Daichi called over to him.
"Oh, yeah, sure!" Suga called back.
He left Hinata to finish with the cart and went over where Daichi and Asahi were standing. "Yeah?" he asked once he reached them.
"You think you'll be able to play?" Daichi asked him, gesturing to his bandaged hand and arm.
"Oh, I don't know yet." Suga answered.
Now Suga was wearing his gym uniform, and since the shirt had shorter sleeves, his forearm was visible, and with it the bandages were as well.
Suga knew that he would get some questioning from Ukai and Takeda when they saw the newer bandaging on his hand. Normally, Suga wouldn't have to be wearing the bandaging on his arm anymore, but the scratches had started bleeding again last night after he'd scraped his arm across the carpet, reopening the wounds. Suga's hand still stung, but it was otherwise okay, apart from nine different cuts running across the palm and three smaller ones from when the glass had dug into his skin when he'd tried crushing it in his hand. That really didn't make it okay then, did it?
"Well, just in case, I want you to sit out. I don't really want those cuts bleeding again." Daichi said.
Suga looked at him and nodded. Daichi had told him that he'd lied about not knowing he'd been cutting himself, and said that he had known instead. So Suga guessed that Hinata and Asahi had known as well, since neither of them reacted with as much shock as they normally would have had they not know that Suga had been cutting himself. He'd only done it twice before, but Suga was sure that he was done with harming himself from now on. Now that he was with Daichi, he believed that he would start doing better. As practice went by and the others showed up, Suga stuck to one corner of the gym, hitting a ball of the wall repeatedly. He wasn't exactly going to sit around doing nothing, was he? No. Suga wasn't going to do nothing, he preferred to be doing something active, even if it was with one hand.
At one point, Suga hit the ball so hard that it flew off the wall and came back at him pretty fast, and it landed itself directly in the face.
"Oof!" Suga fell backward and pressed his hand up to the side his face that had been hit.
He watched with his available eye as the ball he'd been using bounced away. It rolled across the floorboards and stopped at Nishinoya's feet. He looked down at it, and then over towards Suga, who was still on the floor. Nishinoya picked up the ball and trotted over the third year.
"You okay, Suga?" The Libero asked.
"Uh, yeah." Suga said, standing up.
Nishinoya blinked at the bandaging on Suga's left arm and hand, but he didn't say anything about it. Handing Suga back the ball in his hands, Nishinoya started heading back to where he'd been before. Suga felt like there was something he wanted to tell or ask him, but he couldn't think of anything before the Libero had already crossed the gym. Suga looked down at the ball in his hands, trying to think about something. The only thing was, he couldn't think of what to think of. Well ... that made perfect sense, didn't it? (sarcasm implied)
Takeda showed up a few minutes later to supervise, and he was quick to notice Suga's isolation. And the extra bandages. When he realized that Suga's left hand had bandaging on it, he sighed sadly. He would have to talk to him about it as he left for class. Minutes passed, and then practice for that morning ended. Takeda waited outside the club rooms for Sugawara to come down so that he could ask him about his hand and if he'd been cutting himself again. Finally, the third started coming down the steps. As he reached the bottom, Takeda placed one hand on his shoulder to stop him. Suga flinched a little, but he stopped to turn around.
"Sensei?" Suga said, knowing what was coming.
Takeda guided Suga a little ways away from the stairs to the upper club rooms. "Sugawara-kun, have you been cutting yourself again?" Takeda asked, holding out Suga's left arm to look at his hand.
Suga sighed. "Yes," he admitted. "But-"
Takeda interrupted him, though. "I thought we talked about this already!" he exclaimed worriedly.
Suga could see the worry and sadness in Takeda's eyes. "Yes, we did. But I think I have the problem taken care of." Suga said.
That's when Daichi left the club room and headed down the stairs. Suga watched him as he left and disappeared from sight as he headed to his class.
"Are you sure? Because I'm still worried about you." Takeda said, almost pleading.
"Yes, I'm sure. I got some help about the divorce issue, and it actually helped a lot." Suga explained how he'd asked Hinata about how he'd gotten through his parents' divorce and that he'd tried doing the same thing.
Takeda sighed. "Well, I'm glad that it's working out in the end, and I'm willing to trust you not to be cutting yourself anymore." Takeda said.
"I won't, Takeda-sensei." Suga said. "I promise." he added.
Takeda looked into Suga's eyes for a moment, before he let go of his left arm. "Okay, well, get to class then. You wouldn't want to be late. Sorry for holding you back." he said.
"No, no. I understand." Suga assured before taking off to his own class.
Takeda watched as Suga disappeared into the school, and then he realized that Nishinoya was standing next to him. "Oh, Nishinoya-kun! I didn't realize you were there." he gasped.
"Sorry, sensei." Nishinoya apologized. "C-Can I ask a favor of you?" Takeda blinked at Nishinoya.
"Sure, I guess?" he sounded unsure.
Suga had reached his class by now, and to Suga's surprise, no one asked about his hand all morning. At least it was his left hand and not his right, otherwise writing would be rather difficult for Suga to perform. Even so, his hand still stung a little, and Suga thought that it even throbbed a few times. When passing time came, he went to the bathroom to look at it. It didn't look good. He'd didn't have spare bandaging with him, so he had to go to the nurse to get it redone. And more professionally. He was able to make it through the nurse's questioning as to why his palm was so scratched up and get to his next class before the bell signaled the beginning of it. To Suga's relief, his hand no longer throbbed or stung as much as before, and it was feeling a lot better now that it had been re-cleaned and re-bandaged by someone who actually knew what they were doing.
Over the course of his next class, which he also had with Daichi, Suga couldn't help but notice that the other third year kept looking at him. At the end of class, he went up to him and asked, "What?" Suga placed his hands on Daichi's desk as he packed up his things.
"Want to head up to the roof for lunch?" Daichi asked him, pausing in his packing up to look at Suga directly.
Suga thought for a moment, then shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so." he replied at last.
It was lunch now, so Suga followed Daichi up to the roof where few people ever went during any time of the day. There was a slight breeze up there, but neither boys minded. Suga had a hunch as to why Daichi had brought him up there.
When Suga came out onto the roof, though, Daichi was already standing at the edge, with his hands gripping parapet tightly. Suga stopped and stared at him for a moment, before walking over to join him. He placed his crossed arms on the top of the parapet and looked over at Daichi.
"What's this about, Daichi?" Suga asked.
Daichi was silent.
"Daichi?" Suga leaned his head forward more to attempt looking Daichi in the face.
He was staring out into the distance, and Suga actually tried to see what Daichi was looking at, but he couldn't figure out what it was.
"Suga," Suga looked over at Daichi again when he spoke. Daichi was still looking into the distance, but then he turned to face Suga. "Will you go out with me?" he asked. Suga seemed surprised. He thought that was already obvious, but ... never mind.
"Daichi, you don't have to ask that." Suga pointed out. "But, yes, of course I will." he answered.
Suga moved closer to Daichi and the other third year met him halfway. They were currently the only students on the roof, so no one would see them kissing again. Or so they thought. Hairoguma was still following Suga around, and he saw them. He saw them and he hated it, he wanted to get it over with, but he had to wait until the end of the day to do his dirty work. After seeing what he'd done last night, Hairoguma wanted to get rid of him as soon as possible, get it over with, make sure that he wouldn't be there for him to get soft over. Soon, Hairoguma would take care of him, make sure that it would happen. Hairoguma wasn't after Suga, though. He was going to take out Daichi. Sure, it wasn't part of the agreement, which was if Suga told anyone that he'd been raped, Hairoguma would do the same to them and then kill them, but this was something that irritated him so much that he wanted to be sure that it never happened again.
When Suga and Daichi parted once more, Suga felt as though he was moving along with things, now. Maybe he could finally put aside what had happened? Hopefully, that was the case. Daichi and Suga ate their lunches up there on the roof together, and when it was time to be heading to their next class, the went down together. Their classes were separate at this time, so the parted ways.
But it's only for a matter of time, Suga reminded himself.
Halfway through his next class, Suga received a note from his neighbor.
"Are you busy later?" it said.
Suga wrote his reply. He was asking when the kid meant. He passed it back to them before the teacher turned around. A moment later, it came back.
"After class, maybe?" it said.
Suga looked at them and found that the student was looking directly at them. Suga had seen the kid before, but never actually talked to him. His hair was blonde and he had blue eyes, and he seemed to have an overload of freckles on his face. Suga nodded his answer, and then the other kid slowly turned to face the front.
It was after class that Suga would know why he looked so worried.
"What?" Suga stopped and looked at him once the two of them were outside the classroom. The kid turned around to face him. He'd pulled out his phone and was typing something in.
"Do you know this guy?" He asked, showing Suga his phone.
There was a picture on the screen of a man with flat, brownish-orange hair and green eyes. Suga's eyes widened. He recognized that man. That was Hairoguma, the man who'd raped him.
"How did you get this?" Suga demanded.
"The guy has been following you around. You know that, right?" the kid asked.
Suga looked up from the phone and at the kid. "Wait ... he's what?" he was startled.
So his guess had been correct. Hairoguma was following him around after all. That wasn't exactly reassuring.
"So, I take it you had no idea?" the kid guessed. "You might want to talk to one of the teachers about that. The guy looks pretty shifty to me." he said.
"Yeah, I do know him. Though just not in a good way." Suga said.
"Oh, so you mean he's stalking you or something?" the kid asked.
Suga looked out the window across the hall from the corner of his eye. "Yeah, thanks for this." he said.
"Sure, no problem." the kid said.
Suga left him and headed to his last class, though the new information he'd just received was making him nervous. If Daichi hung around him a lot, something bad was what would come out of it. If Suga was lucky, Hairoguma would stick to the shadows and lend him and Daichi some space.
And then maybe strike when I least expect, Suga thought.
He didn't like taking risks, especially when it came to others. Especially Daichi.
Suga sat through his last class in boredom, just wanting it to end. The bell couldn't have come any sooner than it did, and Suga was quickly headed off for the gym. Even if he couldn't properly practice, he definitely wasn't wiling to skip another session. There was still something that he could do; watch out for Daichi. If Hairoguma was in fact following him around, then he must be planning to do something. There was a chance that he thought that Suga had told Daichi about what he'd done, and was was going to try to erase the evidence. Suga wasn't sure what to think, but he was about to run into Shimizu. He skidded to stop but ended up tripping over his own feet, falling to the floor. Shimizu stop and looked behind her, she didn't see anything and looked down when Suga let out a groan.
"Ouch," Suga complained, rubbing his face.
"Oh, Sugawara-san, are you alright?" Shimizu asked.
Suga stood up again and nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine." he said.
After Shimizu seemed convinced, she continued walking to the gym for club with Sugawara following her. When they reached the gym, Suga was pulled aside by Ukai.
"How are you feeling?" he asked, and Suga was then aware that Takeda had told the Coach about his hand.
"Fine, I guess." Suga answered, shrugging slightly.
Ukai sighed. "I meant your arm. Takeda-sensei told me about your hand this morning." the Coach said.
Suga's bandaged hand twitched slightly. Suga let out a breath. "I believe I have found a solution to the cutting thing, though." he explained.
Ukai studied him for a moment. He crossed his arms.
"Well, alright, but I don't want to see you showing up with more bandaging, okay?" Ukai was trying to make this clear.
Suga knew this was obviously his way of keeping an eye on him. He nodded his reply and then Ukai let Suga go inside the club room.
"Hey, K- Suga." Daichi said, correcting himself quickly before saying Suga's first name. Luckily, no one noticed this. "How is your arm?" Daichi asked.
"It doesn't hurt anymore." Suga said. "Though I'm still not sure about being able to play." he added, raising his left arm a little to look at it.
"Hmm, you never know until you try." Daichi said. "How does it look?" he asked.
Suga blinked. He hadn't actually taken a look at the scratches since he'd redone the bandages Monday night.
"Yeah, I guess so." Suga replied.
Daichi waited until Tanaka left the room to respond. When he did, the two of them were left alone. Supposedly. "But I can understand what your saying." he said. "You don't want it reopening and bleeding again." he finished.
Suga looked at his arm again. He leaned against the wall and started undoing the bandages.
When Suga was done, all that seemed to be left of the scratches were pale lines, though it was easy to tell that they had been made by a razor. Daichi raised an eyebrow when he took a look at Suga's arm.
"Wow, I didn't think scratches like that could heal so quickly." he said.
Suga shook his head in disagreement. "They can't. It's just clean, is all." he said.
The scratches didn't run all the way up Suga's forearm, maybe two or three inches up his wrist. Suga had only cut the top part of his arm, so the vital spot on his wrist was fine. He hadn't been trying to do that kind of thing.
Daichi thought for a moment. "Wait, I think I might have something you can use." Suga watched as Daichi started rummaging through his schoolbag. "Here," he said, handing Suga what looked like a wrist cast.
"What is it?" he asked.
"My bowling glove; I forgot to take it out on Sunday and just forgot about it. You should be able to wear it on either hand." Daichi explained.
Suga looked at him in surprise. "You bowl?" he sounded perplexed.
Daichi shrugged. "Sometimes. On family reunions mostly." he said.
"Oh," Suga said as he slipped the glove over his left hand.
There weren't any fingers on it, so Suga's still showed, but it still covered up the scratches. Daichi had been right about being able to wear it on either hand, because it fit comfortably, even with the bandaging on Suga's hand.
"Thanks, Daichi." Suga said, smiling at the captain.
Daichi was suddenly really close to Suga, and before Suga knew it, the two of them were kissing again.
When they parted, Daichi said, "I'll see you in the gym once you're finished changing." and then he left.
Suga changed and then started heading down from the club room. He was almost to the door of the gym when a ball flew over his head. Suga fetched it before finally heading inside.
"Suga-san!" Hinata ran up to him. "I was using that." he said.
Suga handed him back the ball in his hands. "Well, be careful where you're hitting or throwing it, Hinata." he advised.
"Okay!" Hinata nodded before running off to rejoin Kageyama.
Suga watched him go before looking around for Daichi. He found him doing serves on the opposite side of the gym. He'd just sent another serve over the net towards Asahi, but this one went too high and flew over the Ace. Suga started running towards it and managed to get behind the ball before it reached the floor. Because of the sudden slide across the wood panels, Suga slipped and fell over onto his side. Asahi had turned around in time to catch the ball after Suga had hit it before it hit him in the face.
"Oh, sorry, Asahi!" Suga said, realizing what could have just happened.
"Oh, that's okay, Suga." Asahi said, waving his hand. "Are you alright?" he asked as Suga stood up again.
Suga nodded, and then gave a small sigh.
"Is your arm okay enough to be practicing?" Asahi asked, his concern almost seeming to be getting the better of him.
"Huh? Oh, Daichi gave me this to help." Suga explained, showing Asahi the wrist glove.
"Oh," Asahi looked back over at the captain.
Daichi was watching the two of them from across the gym in patient silence.
Asahi went back to serve-and-receive practice with Daichi, and Suga jumped a while later when Nishinoya came over and asked Asahi to work with him.
"Oi, your receives are lousy as usual! Did you even do what I told you too?!" Kageyama was saying to Hinata.
He threw a ball purposefully into the decoy's face.
"Ouch!" Hinata exclaimed. "Bakayama, you jerk! That hurt!" he fumed.
Kageyama rolled his eyes. "No it didn't, stop lying." he said.
Hinata didn't seem to be listening, though. He had his head tilted down a little and was looking at the floor. Kageyama stepped up to him. When Hinata didn't react, Kageyama karate chopped him on the head.
"Listen when I'm talking to you, dumbass!" the setter growled.
"Ah, sorry, Kageyama!" Hinata defended.
Kageyama thought he saw something in Hinata's eyes, so he asked, "What's distracting you?" Kageyama looked Hinata directly in the face as he said this.
"Huh?" Hinata sounded confused. "What do you mean?" he asked.
Kageyama became frustrated by this. "Then why are you spacing out so much lately?!" he demanded.
"I don't know!" Hinata exclaimed.
"Well, figure it out." Kageyama said angrily.
"Okay, okay!" Hinata put his hands up defensively.
Although he was saying that, Hinata was actually lying. He knew exactly why he kept getting distracted during practice and sometimes even during classes. It was about the feelings he'd been telling Suga that he had for someone. That someone, who he didn't know how to confess his feelings too, was, in fact, Kageyama.
It had actually come unexpectedly; his emotional feel towards the setter. But it was also something that Hinata was determined to get through unscathed (whatever that meant).
"Hinata?" Kageyama's voice startled Hinata out of his trance of thought. "Are you okay?" the setter asked.
Hinata noticed a hint of concern in Kageyama's voice and he realized that he'd been standing in the same place for several minutes in total silence.
"Huh? Sorry, I'm fine now." Hinata said.
"Are you sure?" Kageyama asked.
"WATCH OUT!" someone called.
A ball hit Kageyama in the side of his head before he could do anything.
"Sorry, Kageyama! Are you okay?" Tanaka had come running up to him.
"Yeah," the setter replied.
"Okay, but your face is now really red." Tanaka pointed out as he picked up the ball that had hit the setter.
As Hinata teased Kageyama like the person he was, Ukai was keeping an eye on Sugawara. He wasn't bothered if the third year practiced at all, but he wanted to be sure that he wasn't hurting himself in doing so.
"Ukai-kun." Ukai looked over at Takeda, who was pointing at his watch.
Ukai took the whistle from around his neck and blew into it. The commotion around the gym stopped in seconds, and then everyone started lining up for team practice. For the receives, Suga wouldn't have been all too sure if Daichi hadn't given him the wrist glove and practiced with him for a while earlier.
(Team practice: where Ukai gives the ball for certain maneuvers/ Individual practice: where the team practices with other members on things/ Free practice: where the team is free to practice or have a conversation with team members/ Match practice: where the whole team is involved with a match against the other members)
With receives and serves not a problem for Suga, it was tossing that had him wondering. The glove prevented him from bending his wrist enough to make a proper toss, but luckily, he was able to do it as he normally did. The only problem was, Suga felt something wasn't right. It was after practice ended that he discovered the problem. He was bleeding again. It was just one of the tiny cuts on his finger, though, so it wasn't that big of an issue. Still, Suga had been hoping he'd get through practice without bleeding. Suga curse under his breath as he pulled out one of the band-aids he always kept in his bag for in case one the others got cut or something. Suga carefully slipped off the glove and started wrapping his finger. Daichi noticed this, but he knew better than to say anything about it around the others. It would just get them worried. Even with his delay, Suga was ready to leave before Daichi was, so he waited outside for him. Hinata was passing him when Suga remembered.
"Oh, Hinata," he stopped the first year before he could leave.
"Huh?" Hinata faced Suga.
"How is your thing going?" Suga asked.
It took Hinata a moment to realize what the third year was referring to. "I'm getting there... I think." Hinata said, slightly unsure.
"If you're having issues, Hinata, try waiting for the right moment." Suga suggested.
Hinata thought about this for a moment.
"What if it doesn't come?" he asked.
Suga placed a hand on one of Hinata's shoulders. "It will come, Hinata. Just trust that you'll know when. And when it does, it's a take it or leave it situation. Okay?" Suga said reassuringly.
Hinata sighed, slumping his shoulders.
Suga leaned down a little so that he was at Hinata's level. "Here," he said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a string necklace and showing it to Hinata.
"What is it?" Hinata asked, taking the necklace in hand and looking at the small carving of a bird.
"Well, it's supposed to be a good-luck charm." Suga explained. "I don't wear it anymore, though. When I got it, I was told that it was a raven." he said.
The carving was smooth, and it was painted black. Only the lines that gave the bird its shape and detail had been left alone and were still the wood's natural pale tan color.
"Thanks, Suga!" Hinata grinned up at the third year.
Suga smiled back at him. "Just remember what I told you?" he said.
Hinata nodded and slid the necklace over his head and around his neck. As Suga watched Hinata leave, Daichi appeared next to him.
"What was that about?" he asked, startling Suga.
"GAH! Oh, Daichi ... don't do that." he said.
Daichi looked at him. "What? Step in beside you?" he teased.
Suga rolled his eyes. "You know what I meant." he said.
Daichi laughed. "Of course I do! I know you." he said.
"Okay, Daichi, what are you getting at?" Suga crossed his arms and looked the captain in the eyes.
Daichi's expression turned annoyed. "You can't intimidate me, Suga." he said.
"I'm not trying to." Suga said.
"How do I know that?" Daichi narrowed his eyes.
"I thought you said that you knew me?" Suga repeated.
Daichi sighed. "Okay, okay. Fine." he said. "I guess you win this one." he added.
"Great," Suga said, lowering his arms. He placed one on Daichi's shoulder. "So, what were you getting at earlier?" he asked again.
"What do you mean 'what was I getting at'? I was just trying to strike a regular conversation!" Daichi explained.
Suga rolled his eyes. "Sure you were." he pulled Daichi with him behind the club rooms and leaned in for a kiss.
Daichi just went with it and kissed back. "Now how do I know that you're not trying to get at something?" he teased.
"Come on," Suga said.
Daichi followed him. "Hey wait," he said suddenly. "Why am I the one following you? It's my house after all." he stated.
Suga looked back at him and Daichi raised his hands.
"Okay, I'm following." he said, continuing after Suga.
They stopped at the foothill store for something quick to eat, and ran into Nishinoya and Tanaka there.
"Hey, guys!" Nishinoya cheered, his eyes seeming to be popping of their sockets.
"What's up with you?" Daichi asked.
Nishinoya didn't answer, but instead started looking around wildly.
Daichi looked to Tanaka for any possible answer. The one he got was Tanaka holding up an opened sugar packet.
Here we go ... Daichi and Suga both thought.
Nishinoya was already more hyper than the team could handle at times, but when he ever got into a sugar rush/high, it was a disaster. Nishinoya never shut up most of the time either, and when after a sugar overload, well ... I think you would know what it was like. Nishinoya x 20.
"Just how many packets of sugar did Coach give him?" Daichi asked.
Tanaka shook his head. "He didn't." he said. "Noya here swiped them from right under Ukai-san's nose." Tanaka explained.
Daichi and Suga were shocked. They looked over at Nishinoya, who was looking all over the place, as though searching for something interesting.
"Just how many packets of sugar did he get his hands on?" Suga asked.
Tanaka raised up seven fingers.
"T-That many?!" Daichi stuttered.
Tanaka sighed. "Of course, with Noya unresponsive like this, I had to pay for them. I only got five payed for, though. I still can't believe Coach made me buy them ..." Tanaka sighed.
Daichi got a determined expression on his face all of sudden.
He stalked inside the store and walked up to the counter. Suga and Tanaka watched Nishinoya as he scrounged around the surroundings as if he could smell something sweet. He ran back over to the two of them and was suddenly a major chatter box. By the time Daichi came back out a minute after going in, Suga and Tanaka were trying to clamp their hands over Nishinoya's mouth to get him to shut up for even a second.
"Thought that might be the case, so I bought some duct-tape. Oh, and Tanaka, I took care of your problem." Daichi held out a roll of gray duct-tape and started wrapping a strip around Nishinoya's mouth and head, so he couldn't pull it off so easily.
"MMM!" the Libero protested, clawing at the tape keeping him mostly quiet.
"At least it wasn't that much sugar." Daichi said.
Suga and Tanaka nodded in agreement. They still clearly remembered the one time during his first year that Nishinoya had a major sugar overload and passed out soon after. He wound up in the hospital in a sugar induced coma that had lasted a week. God, that was probably the most frightening situation that the team had faced with one of their members. Since then, Nishinoya himself was careful to watch how much sugar he ate. Most of the time. Sometimes (like now) he would lose control and go nuts. It was then that the team had to restrain him.
Nishinoya suddenly had a sugar crash and he fainted.
"Ah, Noya!" Tanaka cried, leaping underneath the Libero to catch him. They lay him on the ground carefully and Tanaka called Nishinoya's parents. "I think I've got it from here." Tanaka said to Daichi and Suga.
"You sure?" Daichi asked.
Tanaka nodded. "Yeah, Noya-san has given me problems like this before." he laughed.
Daichi and Suga looked at each other for a moment before they nodded to Tanaka.
"All right, then. Well, I guess we'll see you tomorrow." Suga said.
After Daichi and Suga left the foothill store, a shadowy figure slipped away to follow them. Hairoguma, the devilish rapist, was waiting for the right time to strike, though he was also still trying to figure out how to make his plan happen.
As Suga and Daichi walked back to Daichi's home, Suga became aware that Hairoguma was following them the way back. At one point, Suga looked behind him for any sign of the crazy rapist, but when he saw nothing he faced forward again.
"Something wrong, Koshi?" Daichi asked.
Suga shook his head. "No, everything's fine." he said. I think, he thought afterwards.
No doubt Suga was worried about Hairoguma popping up all of a sudden out of nowhere, but if they were lucky, the man wouldn't attack any time soon.
Even as Suga continued to think nothing was going to happen, he kept getting the feeling that something wasn't right; that something was wrong. He couldn't help glancing around every now and then for any sign of Hairoguma as he and Daichi made their way up to the front door of Daichi's house. Thankfully, they made it inside without any problems. Still, Suga was expecting some sort of trap or something of the sort to suddenly get set off with every second he was there. The reason for added worry was the fact that Daichi didn't know that Hairoguma even existed. Hopefully, at least.
Several hours passed and nothing happened, and then Daichi went to take out the trash. Suga watched him nervously, looking for Hairoguma from every angle he could possibly come from. If only Suga had considered behind himself, and that this in itself was all a trap.
"Looking for someone?" Suga spun around at Hairoguma's deep voice, coming face to face with the rapist. There were spots of red covering his face, and Suga wasn't sure if it was the mans own blood or someone else's. Hairoguma grabbed Suga's arm with a painfully tight grip, causing Suga to cry out in pain, which alerted Daichi to the fact that something was wrong, and then Suga was dragged from the front entrance and away into the living room. Hairoguma pulled out a knife and pressed Suga against the wall, holding the blade to his throat.
"Suga?" Daichi called, the sound of the front door closing made Hairoguma look behind him. "Who the hell are you?!" Daichi demanded when he entered the living room and saw the stranger threatening his friend (boyfriend).
"Daichi!" Suga cried as Hairoguma threw the knife in his hand towards Daichi.
"WHOA!" Daichi gasped as the sharp object just barely missed him and was embedded in the wall just inches from his face. Seeing as he'd missed his target, Hairoguma knew that he'd have to change tactic quickly. He released Suga and ran over towards Daichi, who jumped from the spot and landed several feet away. Hairoguma yanked the knife from the wall and lunged at Daichi. Suga wasn't having it, though. He ran across the room and jumped in between the rapist and Daichi, blocking the way.
"SUGA!" Daichi cried when he realized what had happened.
Hairoguma had seen Suga jump in front of him, so he'd quickly lowered his aim and drove the knife into Suga's side. He pulled it out quickly and bolted, desperate to get off the scene as quickly as possible. Daichi ran forward to catch Suga as he began to fall to the floor. Suga was pressing his hand against his stab wound and used his other to keep himself from falling by placing it on the floor in front of him. The carpet was being stained red with small drops of blood that got through Suga's hand and fingers. Daichi raced over to his phone and quickly dialed the emergency number.
Suga's vision was going in and out focus as his eyes were slowly closing. The strength in his arm was fading as he heard Daichi giving their location for an ambulance. Finally, Suga's arm gave way underneath him and he collapsed onto his side. The next several moments were blurry, but Suga thought he saw the darkening sky for a split second before it changed to the roof of a vehicle. The next thing he saw were several lights passing overhead and a few other people. The last thing he saw before finally losing consciousness was Daichi watching him be taken away.
Daichi dialed the emergency number and gave the information he needed to. As soon as he hung up, Suga collapsed onto his side, his body going limp.
"KOSHI!" Daichi cried as he ran over to his fallen friend.
Suga was now unconscious, and Daichi ran into the kitchen to grab a dish towel and came back quickly. He pressed the towel over the bleeding wound in Suga's side. His shirt was badly stained, and there was already a large red stain on the floor. Daichi did what he could to keep Suga from bleeding out too much as he listened desperately for the sound of sirens. A minute later, the wailing noise could finally be heard, and Daichi called the paramedics into the room once they had entered the house.
They told him to keep holding pressure on the wound while the got Suga onto a board so they could take him outside to the gurney. An oxygen mask was strapped over Suga's mouth and nose, and for a moment as Suga was being loaded into the ambulance, Daichi though that he saw his eyes open just a little before they closed again. The ride was agonizing for Daichi, and it only got worse when they finally reached the hospital. Daichi was stopped by another doctor and could only watch as Suga was wheeled away. Daichi was directed to the lobby, where he dialed up Suga's mom, who had given him her number if something ever came up while Koshi was with him.
"Hello?" Suga's mom said when she answered.
"Ms. Sugawara-san?" Daichi said, his voice sounding desperate.
"Oh! Sawamura-kun? Is that you?" Suga's mom asked.
"Yes, I need you to come to Miyagi Central Hospital as soon as you can." Daichi explained hurriedly.
"Oh gosh! What happened?" Ms. Sugawara asked.
"Koshi and I were attacked at my place and he was badly hurt." Daichi explained.
"Oh god! Alright, I'm leaving right now." Ms. Sugawara said.
"Please, hurry!" Daichi said before he hung up.
While Suga was in the ER, Daichi waited for Suga's mother to arrive, as well as news on Suga's condition. Several minutes later, Ms. Sugawara came through the doorway and Daichi signaled for her to come over.
"Have you heard anything yet?" she asked when she reached him, trying to sound calm.
Daichi shook his head. "I've been waiting for fifteen minutes already. I'm getting worried." he said.
Ms. Sugawara placed a hand on Daichi's shoulder after he'd sat down again. Daichi put his head in his hands, and a while later, he felt Ms. Sugawara tapping his shoulder. Daichi looked up at her and saw she wasn't looking at him, so he looked to his other side and saw a doctor with a clipboard in his hands.
"Are you here for Sugawara-kun?" he asked Suga's mom.
She nodded. "I'm his mother." she explained.
"I see," the doctor said. "I'm Dr. Hirojima. Your son's injury was serious, but we've stabilized him for now. Though he lost quite a bit of blood." Dr. Hirojima explained.
"Can we see him?" Daichi asked.
The doctor looked down at him, since Daichi was still sitting in the chair. "Well," Dr. Hirojima began. "He's still under the anesthesia from his surgery, but yes. Follow me."
Daichi got up and Suga's mom went with him, following after the doctor down a few different hallways and past several other rooms that were either had another patient in them or were empty.
"He's just in here." Dr. Hirojima stopped next to a door and allowed them inside.
Ms. Sugawara was immediately next to the bed, with her hand on her son's. Daichi, however, had stopped after coming through the door. He was relieved to see Suga alive, but what he didn't want to see was him in this situation. He hated it; seeing Suga injured and in the hospital.
A blood and IV drip stood placed next to the bed, and an oxygen mask was still strapped to Suga's face, and it fogged just slightly whenever he exhaled. His breath pattern was evenly paced, and the monitor showed his heart rate remaining the same as the seconds passed. Daichi must have been moving absentmindedly, because he realized that he was suddenly next to the bed, his hand holding Suga's. It was a moment before Daichi felt something slip down his cheek from his eye and realized that he was starting to cry. He wiped an arm over his face to try and clear his eyes, to hide the tears. Why had that man tried to kill Suga? No, wait a minute. If Daichi recalled the event correctly, the man had been trying to kill him! Suga had save Daichi's life at the risk of losing his own. Daichi's heart ached when he realized that Suga would probably do just about anything for him. Just how long had he been hiding his feelings?
The next day, Daichi went to school alone. He passed Tanaka and Nishinoya, who seemed okay after what happened last night, but Daichi wasn't willing to talk to anyone. If only it could have stayed that way a little longer.
"Daichi!" Asahi called over to him.
"Hey Asahi." Daichi sighed, sounding rather gloomy.
"Is something wrong, Daichi? I've never seen you like this before." Asahi said.
Daichi sighed again.
Asahi looked around. "Where's Suga?" he asked. "I thought he was staying with you this week?" the Ace wondered.
"He was," Daichi said. "and then something happened." he finished.
"Something happened?" Asahi repeated. "Is everything okay?" he asked, a little worriedly.
Daichi let out shuddering breath. He didn't like thinking about what had happened, and he didn't want to worry Asahi, but despite how many times he might have to repeat it that day, Daichi began explaining. "Someone broke into my place last night. It put Suga in the hospital." he said.
Asahi's eyes widened. "What?!" he gasped. "Is Suga okay?!" he demanded desperately, grabbing Daichi's sleeve.
"Whoa, calm down, Asahi! K-Suga's fine." Daichi explained.
Asahi sighed with relief and let go of Daichi. "How long until he gets out?" he asked.
Daichi replied with a shrug. "Hopefully, not too long. But I don't think that Suga can even walk at the moment with his injury." he said.
"Hmm." Asahi looked ahead of him.
They were already crossing through the school grounds to the gym when they ran into Hinata. The small first year was peering around a corner at someone, and Daichi and Asahi were stricken with curiosity.
"Whacha doin', Hinata?" Daichi asked with a failed attempt of casualty.
Hinata jumped. "Suga-san! I-" Hinata spun around and stopped mid-sentence. "Oh, Captain. I thought you were Suga." he said, placing a hand behind his head.
Daichi frowned. "How? We sound too different to be mistaken as the other." the Captain said.
Hinata smiled nervously, scratching the back of his neck. "Oh," he said.
"Why did it seem like you were afraid of it being Suga?" Asahi asked.
"Oh, no, Suga-san actually gave me some advice on something and I'm not sure if I'm following it correctly." Hinata explained.
"What's this 'advice' he gave you and for what?" Daichi asked.
Hinata's face turned slightly pink. "Uh," he didn't know how to explain to the two third years about his crush situation. Hinata nervously pressed his two index fingers together, his face growing red. "Well, I told him that there's someone I like, and Suga-san told me to wait for the right moment to confess, but. . ." Hinata paused, realizing how much he was saying. His face went redder.
"You can't figure out how you'll know when it's there?" Asahi guessed. Hinata and Daichi both looked at him. "What?" Asahi looked back at the two with a similar gaze. "I took advice from Suga once before, too y'know." he said, raising an eyebrow.
Hinata glanced back around the corner and saw that Kageyama had gone.
"So," Daichi said. Hinata turned to him again. "who is it that you like, anyways?" Daichi asked.
"Kageyama." Hinata quickly slammed his hands over his mouth the moment he'd said it. He shut his eyes tightly as his entire face went a bright red color again behind his hands. Oops.
Daichi's and Asahi's expressions went blank, however.
Hinata's ... gay? They both thought.
The idea of it was a shock in itself, since Hinata didn't seem like that type of person, but since it was in fact a reality ... Neither Asahi nor Daichi knew what to think of this new development. Hinata, however, was so red with embarrassment that he looked like a ripe tomato. When he finally noticed the third year's expressions, he asked.
"You're not weirded or grossed out, are you?" Hinata looked nervously between the two third years.
"What? No, no! That's not it." Daichi said. "We're just a little ... surprised, is all." he explained.
Hinata sighed with relief.
"Well, Hinata, you don't want to creep him out, for one thing." Asahi said.
"Yeah, I figured!" Hinata exclaimed. "It's just ... how do I do that?!" he sounded distressed.
"Don't get all upset, Hinata! We're just trying to help!" Daichi explained.
"I know you are but-" Hinata was stopped by Asahi.
"Daichi, we'll miss practice." the third year said, pointing at his watch.
"Oh crap! You're right!" Daichi exclaimed.
Daichi, Asahi, and Hinata ran for the gym, almost racing each other to see who could reach it first. Ennoshita had been given the key to the gym yesterday, so no one was waiting on Daichi to arrive. Seeing as he'd been practicing again, most of the others were a bit surprised that Suga didn't show. Other than him and Asahi, no one else knew about what happened, so Daichi called in the team and announced that Suga won't be at school for a while. The team was relieved to know that Suga was alright, but most couldn't help but still be worried about him.
Over the course of the day, the news slowly spread somehow, and Daichi wanted to know who on the team let it slip. He would have to ask later at afternoon practice. When that finally rolled around, though, Daichi remembered that Ukai didn't know about Suga yet. Neither did Takeda, now that he thought about it. He would try to tell them both at once so that he wouldn't have to explain it twice over. Ukai and Takeda rarely ever appeared for morning practice, and when either or both of them did, it was usually on the day of a practice match.
"Captain!" Daichi stopped at the sound of Hinata's voice. He turned to find the first year running up to him.
"Hey Hinata." Daichi greeted.
"I already talked with Asahi-san about it, and I was just coming to ask you." Hinata said once he caught up to Daichi and caught his breath. "But, um, could you not tell anyone what I said this morning?" Hinata asked.
"Why would I? Just seeing how embarrassed you were when you accidentally told Asahi and I says something in itself." Daichi said. He looked around quickly before leaning in closer to Hinata. "I'll let you in on something so long you won't tell anyone else." Hinata clamped his mouth shut tightly at Daichi's words. "I am too." Daichi said. Hinata blinked at him.
"Huh?" the decoy was puzzled. Daichi chuckled. "Come on, I'll explain on the way." he said.
So, Daichi and Hinata both ended up exchanging thoughts on their feelings. To Hinata, it actually felt kind of nice to be open about his for once. Keeping it to himself had felt like torture until Suga had asked it out of him. At the gym, Hinata ran over to Nishinoya. Not everyone was there yet, so there was still some time. Once the rest of the team finally arrived, Daichi started stretches, and then the team began practicing. About an hour in, Ukai finally showed up, and Daichi was signaled over after he quickly noticed that Suga was missing.
"Yeah?" Daichi said.
"Do you know where Sugawara is?" the Coach asked.
Daichi looked behind him at the rest of the team for a second before turning back to the two adults. "Can we talk about this outside?" he asked.
Ukai and Takeda looked at each other before Ukai nodded. Daichi went with the Coach, though Takeda stayed inside. Daichi guessed that it was to supervise the others, and that Ukai would tell him once they got back inside.
"Okay, something's obviously up." Ukai said, crossing his arms. "What's going on?" he demanded.
"Suga's in the hospital." Daichi answered.
Ukai's eyes widened with horror. "What?!" he exclaimed. "What happened?! What did he do?!" he looked and sounded frightened.
"Whoa, wait! It's not for that kind of reason!" Daichi explained quickly. He took a deep breath. "Last night, someone broke into my house and Suga was hurt. But he'll be okay from what I've been told." he finished.
Ukai let out a relieved sigh. "Okay, I thought that he'd tried and done something serious. Knowing that it was something else though, I can calm down a little. But I'm still worried about him. What exactly happened?" The Coach asked.
So Daichi explained more thoroughly of what happened last night. When Ukai let him go, Daichi went to help Hinata and Kageyama. Although he was helping the two first years, Daichi was quick to see Ukai telling Takeda about Suga. Practice got out earlier than usual that day, which Daichi took full advantage of. Once he'd left the school, he went straight to the hospital. Once there, he got the number of Suga's room and hurried off through the many hallways to it. Finally, Daichi came upon the room in question and saw Suga was awake.
"Hey Daichi." Suga said when Daichi entered the room. His voice sounded weak, but he otherwise looked pretty good.
"Hey," Daichi replied. "How are you feeling?" he asked.
Suga shrugged lightly. "Well, it doesn't hurt anymore." he said. He changed the subject abruptly. "Do you know yet about Hinata's situation?" he asked.
Daichi chuffed. "Not only do I know about it, but I know who he likes." he said.
Suga's brow furrowed. "How on earth did you get that out of him?" he asked, puzzled yet intrigued.
"I just asked and Hinata said it, though accidentally." Daichi answered.
"Accidentally?" Suga repeated.
Daichi shrugged. "He was totally embarrassed about it." he said.
"I can only imagine." Suga said.
After a few moments, Daichi finally said, "If only I had been in the house, you wouldn't have to be here." he sighed deeply.
Suga looked at him and thought for a moment. There was a huge chance that Hairoguma believed that he was dead, so he wouldn't know if Suga told anyone. Maybe he could finally say something about it? Suga greatly wanted to get it off his chest, and he was desperately looking for a way to start.
Then Daichi said, "If only I had caught a clear image of that man in my mind, we could put him to justice." Suga knew how to start.
"I knew him." he said.
"W-What?" Daichi stammered, looking up at Suga and blinking in confusion.
Suga was no longer looking at Daichi, but at the bed he was on. "I know that man, Daichi, but not in a good way." Suga began explaining.
Daichi was becoming interested, so he stayed quiet to let Suga continue.
"Look, I told you a lie. I lied to you about why I had been cutting myself. Sure, I was taking the divorce between my parents hard, but I've pulled through." Suga's shoulders slumped so that he looked saddened or smaller than usual. "I was cutting myself because of what happened last Monday." Suga said finally. He felt some sort of chill run through his body, as if he was relieving weight from the dreadful secret.
"W-What ... what happened last Monday?" Daichi asked quietly.
Suga's shoulders shook suddenly and his brow furrowed. "T-That man ... he's been following me around since last Monday, making sure I didn't tell anyone about what he'd done. It was terrifying, and I was too afraid to say anything!" Daichi's heart started pounding against his rib cage as Suga spoke. "Daichi ..." Suga looked up at Daichi and the captain gasped. Suga was crying. Tears were slipping from his eyes and down his face. "He ... he fucking raped me!" Suga had to half force the words out, as it was hard to finally say it. But once he had, he felt ... lighter, as if a heavy weight that had been crushing him was just ... gone.
Daichi's eyes widened and he stared into Suga's crying eyes. This was way worse than he had ever thought. Suga had been raped? How could anyone do such an activity to anyone!? Suga had leaned forward and was resting his forehead on his knees while his arms went around his legs. Daichi had the feeling that it wasn't a great position to be in considering where his wound was, and Daichi knew that he had to do something, and quick. So Daichi stepped up closer to the bed and sat on an open space and wrapped one arm around Suga's shoulder. Suga sat up a little and leaned into Daichi's side, placing his head on Daichi's shoulder.
"Hey, Koshi, wait. We'll get you help, okay?" Daichi comforted, hoping that Suga wouldn't turn on him.
Instead, Suga's eyes opened a little and he gave a small nod. "Okay ..." Suga said, his voice cracking.
Now that he had told someone, and that someone being Daichi, Suga didn't want to leave him at any point, and he didn't want Daichi to leave him either.
"Daichi?" Suga said after a minute or two. Daichi looked down at Suga, who sniffled. "Promise ... promise you won't leave me?" Suga didn't look up, but he knew he wouldn't have to.
"Of course, Koshi. I promise." Daichi said.
Suga managed to crack a small smile at Daichi's words. Of course, Suga meant not for any other reason unless necessary, and Daichi knew this. He knew this very well. He wanted to be there for Koshi, and help him get through this nightmare of his. About twenty minutes later, Suga had fallen asleep, and Daichi had the chance to tell a doctor about his situation. As it happened, visiting hours had now ended, and as Daichi was getting up to leave, a doctor walked in to tell him this.
"Excuse me," Daichi said to her.
"Yes?" she said.
Daichi looked back at Suga for a moment. "Um, my friend told me that he'd been raped a while ago, and I was wondering if something could be done about that?" Daichi said.
The nurse looked around Daichi at Suga. "Alright, well, I'll see what I can get arranged for him." she said.
"Thanks." Daichi said as he headed out.
Daichi wasn't worried about Suga for when he woke up, for before he'd gone to sleep, Daichi had told him that he would be back tomorrow. Now that he knew the truth, Daichi was determined to do whatever it took to help Suga recover. From his physical and mental wounds. He wasn't sure if Suga would want him to tell everyone else, and Daichi would be sure to take caution around that. He would ask him about it tomorrow, and in the mean time, Daichi would just keep it to himself while Suga was checked over.
Over the next few days, Daichi noticed a change in Suga's attitude. He was talking a lot more again, and acting more himself once more. If only that could have stayed. It happened on the day that Daichi had to head home to drop something off before going to the hospital. Only, when he got there, he found that there had been a forced entry. Maybe it was the guy that had raped Suga and tried to kill him? Cautiously, Daichi moved inside the house, his parents were still out at work, but they always came home late. Inside the house, it was eerily quiet, but Daichi quickly noticed how nothing had been taken. So it wasn't a robbery. Then what was it?
"Welcome home." a deep voice said from behind Daichi. He whirled around to see the man that had stabbed Suga, making him the one who had also raped him.
"Y-You!" Daichi exclaimed. "What do you want?!" he demanded.
Hairoguma looked around for a couple of seconds, and then back at Daichi. "For you to come with me." the man grabbed Daichi by the arm and dragged him upstairs to the second floor.
He brought him into Daichi's room, where to Daichi's horror, Suga was tied to the bed. Blood was dripping from his face, though Daichi couldn't see it.
"W-What did you do?! How did you even get him here?!" Daichi demanded desperately.
"That doesn't matter." Hairoguma said, throwing Daichi onto the floor.
He lightly tapped Suga with his foot.
Suga stirred and then looked up a little. "D-Daichi ...?" he murmured.
The look on his face was painful for Daichi to look at. Suga's eyes were faded with exhaustion, and there seemed to be nothing but confusion in his expression.
"What did you do to him?!" Daichi glared at Hairoguma.
"See for yourself." Hairoguma told him, crossing his arms.
Daichi looked back at Suga nervously. Then he noticed the bruises on his arms and face.
"You bastard!" Daichi exclaimed.
Suga was too confused to know what was going on. He only heard unfamiliar voices speaking around him, and he couldn't understand what they were even saying. But then, they began to grow clearer, and with a horrible realization, Suga saw where he was and what was going on.
"What the-? Daichi?!" he gasped, recognizing Daichi's room and seeing Daichi in front of him. And with an even worse feeling, Suga recognized Hairoguma standing behind Daichi. "No! Please, don't do it!" Suga begged, immediately figuring out what was sure to happen.
Daichi looked between Suga and Hairoguma. "Do what?!" he said.
"I'm afraid that it's too late for that, buddy." Hairoguma said. "You see, I figured out who you told, buddy. So, now I've got him here, and both of you will receive punishment." the man chuckled.
Daichi didn't like the sound of that, and he tried to attack Hairoguma, but the man grabbed the front of his shirt and slammed him against the wall.
"Daichi! No, leave him alone!" Suga exclaimed.
Daichi tried to pull his captor's hand off his shirt so he could do something, but the man only got closer to him. And then Hairoguma started kissing Daichi harshly, flicking his tongue around on the inside of his mouth. Suga could only watch with horrified eyes as this happened, and as it did, Daichi only struggled harder.
"Stop!" Suga cried pointlessly.
Hairoguma pulled away from Daichi and glared at Suga. "Shut it!" he growled. "Or I'll cut out your tongue." he said.
Suga breathed shakily as the terrible man lowered Daichi a little and pressed him into the corner and began undressing him. Daichi fought constantly against Hairoguma, trying to escape him. He had to get out of this situation and get Suga out of it as well. He had to get the two of them out of there. But how had this man even gotten Suga out of the hospital? Hairoguma had taken Daichi's jacket and shirt off, so that his chest was left bare.
"Get off of me!" he protested. Hairoguma twitched.
He turned away from Daichi for a second and kicked Suga in the face.
"KOSHI!" Daichi cried. He glared at Hairoguma. "You bastard!" he growled.
Hairoguma took off his belt and used it to tie Daichi's hands together behind his back. This only made it harder for Daichi to fight against the rapist. Suga watched helplessly as Hairoguma forced down Daichi's pants, leaving him in his boxers. Suga couldn't watch this, so he tried to look away. There was no point in trying to do anything to stop Hairoguma, no matter how much he wanted to. He could only shut his eyes tightly as he heard Daichi give distressed noises. Everything had been getting better, but now ... it felt like it was all falling apart all over again, except the damage being made this time was so much worse than the first time.
Suga suddenly realized that Hairoguma was standing in front of him, and he looked up at him nervously. He tried to ignore the fact that the mans lower half was nude. Daichi was in the corner, collapsed on the floor, watching with a slightly out of focus vision as Hairoguma started stripping Suga.
No! Leave him out of his! Daichi thought desperately.
He wanted to say this out loud, but he knew that if he opened his mouth, he would just throw up. Unable to look away or move due to major shock, Daichi could only watch as Hairoguma forced Suga to take him into his mouth. The worst part of it was when the man pushed himself forward, as if trying to choke Suga with his penis. Pointless anger overwhelmed Daichi as Hairoguma put two of his fingers on Suga's nose, plugging it.
"Swallow it." the man said.
Suga didn't want to. He refused to. If he suffocated, fine. He had done it before, but not at this point into it. Hairoguma wasn't just thrusting in his mouth, he'd ejaculated into it. Gross. Just plain disgusting!
"Swallow it!" Hairoguma growled.
Suga couldn't hold his breath much longer and forced himself to swallow what would go down. When the man retracted, Suga was suddenly a coughing, spitting mess. Semen was inside and around his mouth, and he felt like throwing up.
But he knew what would happen if he did. He'd done it before, and it wasn't tasty. Then, with a short lasting wave of relief, Suga realized that Daichi still had his boxers on. He could only guess what had happened then. Hairoguma started stripping Suga, taking off every but of clothing he had on, which wasn't very many. Hairoguma sneered over at Daichi and took Suga into his mouth. He started chewing slightly, each bite painful. Suga grimaced in pain as the man started biting a little harder. He gave a small whimper of pain. At that, Daichi wanted to do something, and he had to do it now. He struggled against the belt binding his hands and tried to get upright enough that he could do something. But Hairoguma seemed to notice, so he decided to make things worse. He lifted his head and put it to Suga's mouth, not even caring about the mess it was, and started to lick the outside and the inside of it, kissing him violently. Suga could only shut his eyes tightly as Hairoguma did this. The roughness of it was horribly familiar, and he just wanted it to stop.
Then, Hairoguma left Suga alone and moved back over to Daichi. He pulled down his boxers and started kissing him again, all the while squeezing tightly, sending stabs of pain through Daichi as he did so. And then Daichi did a stupid thing and kicked Hairoguma where his leg was free. Hairoguma stepped away from Daichi and spat onto the floor. Another mistake.
"You little punk!" Hairoguma exclaimed.
He turned Daichi around and grabbed him by the back of his neck. He pressed Daichi into the corner and put himself inside him. Then he started thrusting. It hurt, and Daichi's expression was full of pain as Hairoguma continued.
"Learned your lesson?" Hairoguma spat as he stepped away and Daichi fell to the floor.
Hairoguma then went back over to Suga, where he took a broken piece of glass off the bed. Daichi eye's widened with terror. He was going to reopen Suga's wound. Suga cried out in immense pain as Hairoguma slid the glass over the injury, cutting the stitches, blood spilling onto the floor.
"NO! S-STOP!" Daichi exclaimed. Suga's cries were growing quieter, but Daichi realized that it wasn't because he was slowly growing weaker, but because Suga was giving in. "No, Koshi! Don't give in! Please!" Daichi begged. But it was hopeless. Suga's eyes were now suddenly glassy and his expression was blank. Hairoguma started laughing horribly.
Tears spilled from Daichi's eyes as he watched Suga give in to everything that Hairoguma did to him. Following the orders and going through with everything he said. He was broken. Shattered. Irreparable. Nothing could fix Suga now. Hairoguma redressed Suga and then took the belt off of Daichi's hands and told him to place them on the wall. Daichi obliged, now realizing that it was pointless to resist. Hairoguma started whipping him with the hard end of the belt, breaking the skin and shedding blood down Daichi's back and onto the floor. Daichi forced the cries of pain down and just grit his teeth at the pain. Finally, Hairoguma stopped, redressed Daichi, and then swung a hard punch at his face, stunning him momentarily as he retreated from the scene after redressing himself.
When Daichi regained mobility, he crawled over to Suga, who had been untied and was now lying on the floor. He was staring straight forward, though he was still breathing.
"Koshi ...?" Daichi mumbled.
Suga didn't react. He was truly broken beyond repair, and there was nothing that Daichi could do about it. Then, Suga mumbled something that Daichi didn't hear.
"W-What?" he asked, hoping that Suga would repeat.
"End it ... please just end it." Suga murmured.
End it? What did he mean? Suga's eyes moved to look into Daichi's. They were no longer glassy, but really faded.
"Daichi," Suga said faintly. "You ... you promised me that you would never leave me, remember?" he said.
Daichi blinked. "Yes, of course I remember that! How could I forget? Don't worry, Koshi. I'll get help!" Daichi started to stand up to run for a phone, but Suga grabbed his arm to stop him.
"No, Daichi." he said, a little louder.
"K-Koshi ..." Daichi was crying again as Suga's eyes fluttered.
He was slipping away.
"No Koshi! Don't you die on me!" Daichi pleaded.
He couldn't let Suga go. And then a crazy thought crossed Daichi's mind. He stood up and left the room, went into the kitchen and took the sharpest knife he could find, and then went back up to his room. He wrote a note for his parents, telling them about everything that had happened that night and explaining the mess.
"Daichi?" Suga mumbled when Daichi lay down in front of him.
"Koshi," Daichi began. "I promise you, at the bottom of my heart, that I will never leave you again." he said.
A few tears fell from Suga's eyes at those words and a tiny smile formed, but it only lasted a second. Suga let his eyes slip shut and then the small smile faded. He was gone. Daichi knew he wouldn't have to grieve, because he would be following him. Daichi grit his teeth and sliced violently at his wrists. The pain felt relieving, and the blood drained from the cuts quickly. Just for quick measure, Daichi made sure to kiss Suga one last time before he slashed the knife across his throat.
Everything started fading quickly, and then . . . it was gone.
