The wind was cold and harsh. The sun, by contrast, was a tiny, bright ball that scattered the darkness into shadows. Fun Ghoul said it was a metaphor. Party Poison said it was just another dose of radiation to keep you warm.

I didn't care what it was: it was cold and dangerous here in the wasteland. There was nothing to do and less to eat, and sleeping with one eye open didn't afford anyone much sleep at all, even though we all pretty clearly needed it-otherwise, Kobra Kid wouldn't be out roller skating every morning at dawn in tights and a tank top.

It was unclear what he actually did during these outings, but Jet Star surmised that he was just doing extra patrolling. I supposed it made sense, but somehow, i thought there was something else, too. In my few weeks here, i had heard the Girl ask twice or so if she could go with him, and Kobra Kid had told her , "Not today. Maybe tomorrow you'll be old enough."

Then Party Poison would smile and put his hands on both our shoulders and tell us not to worry, they'd protect us. I felt like he said that to me more than to Girl, though; it was like he thought i needed the reassurance.

I was...well for lack of better terminology, i guess i was a rescue. Fun Ghoul and Kobra Kid found me in an old office building on the outskirts of Battery City. I had been scavenging the place for food and supplies. I had found myself pretty high up, and then, across a gap in the floor, there it was: The Vending Machine.

It was something i remembered my big brother telling me about when i was little. It was supposed to be filled with all sorts of the tastiest food, like little brown cakes filled with white, squishy stuff, or nuts that tasted sweet, not bitter like i was used to, and even things called Chips that tasted like Cooler Ranch, whatever the hell that was.

It was an impulse. I just couldn't help myself as i lined myself up, ran, and jumped the gap. I felt the soft carpet give way under the 'thud' of my landing feet almost instantly and there was no support to catch me as i fell. My hands swiped and clawed frantically, and one of them impaled itself on a long spike of metal jutting out from the crumbling floor. My other hand grabbed at it almost instantly, trying to save the other the pain.

And then i just hung there. I waited for my family and friends, the other group members, to come and find me. Whenever i heard a rat scratching, i shouted, just on the off chance that it was them. It didn't take long for my arms to grow weak and my voice to grow hoarse, though.

The sun went down. The moon came up. I hung from that misreble pole protruding through my misreble hand, and was misreble. The moon went down. The sun came up. I couldn't hold on any longer, my hands were going numb, but then-thunk-! I swivelled my head slowly, and heard another "thunk!", and my heart thumped in reply. Thank god, i thought, thank god!

I opened my mouth and tried. I tried so hard. The only thing that came out was a squeaky, choked, "Please!" my voice was gone. Whatever, whoever was there would never hear me.

I looked up again only to stare in tired shock as a chiseled face with a mop of blond hair topping it stared back at me from over the ledge where i was hanging by my hand.

"Please help." i said.

The blonde guy nodded and disappeared. I heard, "Ghoul! C'mere!" and suddenly there were two of them, one hanging over the ledge and grabbing me with surreally long arms to pull me towards the ledge, and the other gently freeing my hand.

All the while they were telling me it would be okay. I was going to be okay. They'd take care of me.

Suddenly i was on the ledge again, and being lifted onto the back of 'Ghoul', as the blonde guy had called him. I couldnt hang on, and just curled my arms underneath my chest as Ghoul leaned forward.

We left the ledge, the metal spike, and the vending machine behind us.

Out of the building, our butts in the sand, my back against the blonde guy, Ghoul cleaned my hand with a bottle of whiskey and bandaged it. I only cried a little, and then i laughed.

"All because i wanted what was in that stupid vending machine," i whispered. Then i put my head down on the desert floor and slept.

It was mid afternoon by the time i woke up. Both of them had donated their jackets to keep me warm, i noticed as i sat up. The blonde guy was poking at a small fire, and i brought my knees up to my chin to quell the growling of my stomach.

Blonde Guy looked up. "Hungry?" he asked. I nodded. "Me too. Lemme get us something, kay?" i nodded again and watched him go around me to a small pack and begin digging.

As he handed me a fist-sized package, he told me, "Fun Ghoul-he fixed your hand and carried you-went off to look for more stuff. He should be back soon. The car's not too far away, but its still too far to carry someone. I'm Kobra Kid. Who're you?"

I opened my mouth, but couldn't get the words out. My throat was still raw.

"Its fine, kid. You can tell us later." Kobra Kid said.

When Fun Ghoul came back, we left, burying all traces of us in the sand. We went back towards the building they had found me in, and my heart stuttered. I tugged on Kobra Kid's sleeve.

"Did you-find...anyone?" i managed to rasp out. Kobra Kid looked at Fun Ghoul. Fun Ghoul furrowed his brows and said, "yeah."

"Where?" i asked, barely whispering.

Fun Ghoul pointed towards an alcove by the building, and we headed that way.

It was them: my group and my family. They were tied up and blindfolded, each of them shot twice in the back of the head. There was a neat, white envelope laid neatly on top of one of the bodies, and as my throat closed up i went to them.

I picked up the envelope and turned over the body it was on, hoping i was wrong.

I was not.

In my arms, with a blindfold across his face and his brains falling out from the hole in his head onto my shirt was my big brother. I cried. I screamed as loudly and as much as i could-they came out as silent as a breath.

In the car i clung to the letter and one of the packs tightly, hugging them to myself, as if i thought they could help stop the awful feeling that my heart was tearing itself very slowly into pieces. It had been dark by the time we had reached the vehicle, and i was asleep again by the time Fun Ghoul and Kobra Kid got to the hideout.

They carried me inside and put me onto one of the beds, quietly worrying around me in shifts.

I woke up still holding the letter. I looked around me frantically, serching for my big brother instinctively, but remembered that that was where id gotten the letter from; his dead body. I looked around again: Fun Ghoul slept on a cot opposite me facing the wall and curled into a ball. There were three others, each in a seperate bed, two young men and a young girl. Kobra Kid was gone.

With a deep breath and shaky hands, i slowly and carefully opened the envelope.

It read:

"For the crimes of Abandonment of Society, Social Treason, Disobeying the Company, And Assault With Intent To Harm,

Chrissy Evans

Mark Evans

Shermain Williams

Turk Douglass

Burt Kimms

Ruth Shillik

Daniel Brell

Are sentenced to death on this day, August the 18th, 2019."

Daniel...

Kobra Kid was gone again on one of his 'patrols'. Me and Girl were sitting by the table. Girl was listening to me read out loud from a book that Party Poison had found the week before: Catcher in the Rye. He and Jet Star were playing cards on the floor next to us, and Fun Ghoul was sorting equipment.

The door opened suddenly and Kobra Kid skated inside, catching himself barely on the table and rolling right through Jet Star's and Party Poison's game.

"Dammit, Kobra, you screwed up my hand! I had a full house, dammit!" Party Poison said, shoving Kobra Kid's leg.

"Sorry, Poison." he said. Then he reached down into his tights and started rummaging.

"What the hell, Kobra! Not in front of the fucking kids!" Jet Star yanked at Kobra Kid's wrist, pulling it out of his tights, and out with it came a bright yellow, triangular box.

"Geez, Jet, Careful! Don't break it, it's for Danny!"

Then he threw it onto the table in front of me.

I stared at it, saying nothing. I actually hadn't said anything since taking my brother's name, and telling them it was mine.

"Its a Toblerone." Kobra Kid said. "You said you wanted what was in that vending maching, you remember that? When Ghoul fixed you up?"

I stared at the Toblerone. Kobra Kid...was he looking for a stupid vending machine for me? I didnt realize i had begun to cry until Girl reached over the table and swiped at one of the tears.

"You okay, Danny?" she asked.

Something inside my head clicked then. I remembered Dan telling me about vending machines at his work back from when he was a kid. You put shiny things into them and they spit out food.

"Course, by the time you were born, Benny, money was obsolete, and everyone was using Value Cards." he had said.

I just wanted to see one. Food was so scarce out in the desert, that imagining a big shiny glass box full of food seemed like a fairy tail. If i had been more careful crossing that gap, or maybe if i had never strayed from the group at all...i would be dead, too.

I picked up the Toblerone and stared at it. I knew everyone was staring at me as i tucked my head into my arms and sobbed. If Dan hadn't told me that there was sure to be a vending machine or two still in tact on the upper floors...my brother had all but sent me away to go find one.

I felt a hand squeeze my shoulder, and two more, littler hands took hold of the hair at my temples and pulled. I lifted my head and stared directly into a pair of big, brown, innocent eyes.

"Its okay, Danny." Girl said. She started petting my face, wiping the tears from my cheeks.

"We gotcha, kid." said Jet Star as he ruffled my hair.

Finally, after weeks of becoming numb to the tearing in my heart, it finally broke. It was like glass shattering inside my chest, but more than pain, it felt like a release.

Dan was dead. That didnt mean, though, that i was without a family. That day, hanging by a metal pole through my hand, before i even knew i'd lost my family, i had gained a new one.