The phone call

A/N: this is a crack fic... the altoids thing might not be understood if you don't personally know me... it came along from boredom at lunch... oh and just in case, im also known as minti if you get confused as to who i write about when i use the name minti...

Disclaimer: I don't own any one of any of the characters in Naruto… this plot is mine… (Over active imagination)

Sasuke: WTH

Sakura: huh?

Naruto: Weeeeeee….

Minti: seriously… I don't know u…

Shikamaru: yawn hi

Sakura: it's the siblings… run…

Naruto: huh?

minti- guys there's nothing wrong with it... were too lazy to do anything

Note:

Thoughts

Inner

The phone call

She was sick of it, always being out in the late hours of the night. It was crazy, insane almost. She would drop her (even though im sixty I look like a thirty year old) sensei, Tsunade, off at a bar to party and eventually come out drunk. NO! Actually a few hours after Tsunade was dropped off, she would not only come out of a bar, she would stumble out of it. Sakura would be waiting there the whole time to pick her up and carry her home. Once Tsunade was out Sakura would walk up to her and catch her sensei that was on the verge of passing out. Today was no exception for Sakura.

Sakura had been, as usual, up until two in the morning waiting for Tsunade to, once again, stumble out of some bar drunk and take her home. Today, though, Tsunade was more drunk than normal and Sakura was less than patient. Sakura used her strength, or what was left of it, to pick up her sensei and carry, more like drag, her through the forest to drop her now passed out sensei off at the hokage's office, where she would wake up the next morning angry at Sakura. Sakura on the other hand did not want to spend her Friday nights like this, only to be awoken by her blasting alarm clock the next morning.

It was now six o'clock, four hours later, and her alarm was madly buzzing in her ears. Aside from that, her phone was ringing at such an early time on a SATURDAY morning. She only knew two people who would be calling her at this time on this day, they would be Ino or Naruto. Her best friends and one of them her teammate from way back when, also known as Konah's only number-one-hyper-active-knuckle-headed-ninja, Naruto.

Before she even thought about answering her phone, she used all the force she could manage to build up in her hand to smash her alarm clock into many pieces. This was her fourth alarm clock that week. She then checked the ID and, as expected, it was one of the few numbers she knew very well, Naruto's. She ignored her phone call to hopefully get some more much needed sleep.

Within minutes of the ringing phone stopping, she was asleep. Unfortunately, her sleep didn't last long when none other than Naruto calling her for the second time interrupted it. She had the strangest feeling that if she didn't answer it, he would continue calling her, so she decided to pick up. She was not in the mood to be woken up every five minutes of her Saturday morning; she then picked it up, "What?" she almost snapped at her team mate but she was too tired to care what tone of voice she was to use on him this early in the morning.

Naruto understood that she was annoyed and decided to continue before she got mad at him, he had seen her bad side and he didn't want to be on it. When he started talking, he decided that he would be as cautious as possible. Sakura was getting impatient with Naruto, which wasn't helping his current situation of where he stands with Sakura, who was taking too long to get his point of his conversation across to her. She was about to hang up on him when a speedy mumble came out of his mouth, "Ero-senninhasagranddaughter" he talked too fast for her mind to comprehend at six in the morning.

She hated when he did this mumbling thing but decided to let it slide seeing as she saw him as a brother figure, in which he could pay for it later. Naruto was always doing this to her and she was not getting any more amused with it, more annoyed and sick of the mumbling. Again, it was Naruto and he is too predicable for one to really care about his mumbling, it was normal thing for him.

After stumbling over his words, Naruto took in a deep breath and tried to talk slow enough for Sakura to understand, "Ero-sennin has a granddaughter," Naruto just slow enough for her to understand. On the other side of the phone, Sakura was nodding in understanding. She didn't see what this had to do with her but she took this as a surprisingly interesting fact.

"And this has to do with me why?" she questioned slightly amused with Naruto. She hadn't quite figured out the meaning of his calling upon her to know this apparently vital information. She wasn't expecting the sarcasm she got afterward though. She just didn't see how the fact that Jiraya having a granddaughter was important to her in anyway. She was a bit confused by the fact of the matter though.

"This has to do with you because I want to know if it would be okay with you if I dated her" Naruto said sarcastically while chuckling, teasing his best friend and ex-team mate. He heard grumbling and mumbling from Sakura along with things like baka, dobe, and annoying. Naruto, unsurprisingly, was in too happy a mood to care what Sakura was mumbling on about no matter how much he annoyed her. He started laughing hysterically and further pushing Sakura's irritation.

"Naruto, I'm serious, why is Jiraya having a granddaughter important to me?" she questioned him sternly with her 'I will kill you if you don't be serious' voice along with her almost screaming at him. She was not getting any younger, or patient, and was getting quite mad at him for laughing hysterically on the other end of the phone. If she were where he was, he would not be laughing, he would probably be wincing in pain from the mental thud on the head that she was giving him at this very moment. Sakura inwardly chuckled at herself for the violent thought that had just popped into her head when…

"We are to train with her and her cousin, they are about three years younger than us but it was a favor for Jiraya." Naruto stated finally getting to the point of the conversation. Sakura was noting less than furious at the tidbit of information that she had just received at such an early time on a SATURDAY. She was still a bit confused considering the circumstances of being woken up to the strange news.

She started cussing at her brotherly-like-team-mate while looking around her room frantically for her training clothes. "Does Sasuke know yet?" she asked after she had regained her composure, if she even had any. She found all her clothing and placed it in a spot in her bathroom, then looked into her room, it looked as if it had been hit by a tornado and thrown it back again, in other words, it was a mess. "Hold on a sec, my other line is ringing" and with that note, she switched over to the other line.

" Hi Sakura" Ino's voice yelled cheerfully into the phone, Sakura groaned on the phone, today was not her day, "anything happening today" Ino questioned her best friend (or rival, however way you see it). Sakura was not going to have the best day, the way it started off, was only a sign that it was to get worse.

Her sing-songy friend was giving her a massive headache and she was losing what was left of her patience, if she had what was left of it. "Um, Ino… I've got to go," Sakura stated with worry in her voice as if she didn't want to put her friend down, she knew the kind of temper that Ino had when she was mad. "Naruto's on the other line and its kinda important," she stated trying to reassure her before she had said anything.

"Alright Sakura, I'll let you go" Ino said a bit confused as to why her friend would be talking of something important on the phone to Naruto. Ino didn't see Naruto as the most serious person in Konah, no one did. She hung up after they said their goodbyes and Sakura quickly switched over to the other phone. She didn't want to keep Naruto waiting. After she acknowledged that Naruto was still on the phone, she went to talk. To her surprise, Naruto had found something to keep him busy while she was on the other line. The sound of Naruto eating the ramen that he was dieing to eat all morning had somehow blocked her train of thought.

As soon as Naruto realized that Sakura was on the phone again he continued what he was talking about earlier. "Oh and Ero-sennin thought that training with his granddaughter and her cousin would bring us a benefit. I don't understand how, considering that they are three years younger than us but…" he started mumbling as he went off into thought about what he was talking about. Sakura understood his rant just as she does everyday. "Um… Naruto, what time do we meet up with them?" she was hoping to snap him out of his thought, it seemed to work because he stopped mumbling and responded with a 'huh'.

"Oh, time right… we get there at seven" Sakura knew that if this was a fact, the day just got worse, for she did not want to train on one of her days off from seeing Naruto. Naruto was fully aware of such early times in the day for training on a Saturday but he was full of energy (note: he did NOT go on an early morning run with Gai sensei.) What he was not aware of was that Sakura didn't want to see him, making him even more oblivious.

Sakura needed to get an answer out of Naruto quick because the first time she asked, Ino called and ruined their, for once, normal conversation and probably making him forget her question, which was quite normal on his part. "Um… Naruto, why haven't you called Sasuke?" she kind of had an idea for an answer on that one, but it didn't seem like Sasuke. Well, she could imagine Sasuke doing such a thing to Naruto because he became annoyed with him quite often. She was somewhat confused as to why he hadn't called him before her because they were best friends, almost brothers.

Naruto was stuttering and choking on his words now. She did have a point as to why it wasn't normal to not call Sasuke before her; he just didn't want to answer her question as to why he hadn't called Sasuke yet. "Oh… that… that's because last time I called him in the morning, Umm… he kinda threatened to… um… kill me" he was coughing and stumbling over each word that had just come out of his mouth, that, for him, was one of the hardest sentences for him to speak. Sakura was silently chuckling while Naruto shuddered at the thought of Sasuke's threat. Naruto was in too good a mood to think of death, or Sasuke or death and Sasuke for that morning. Plus, the thought of Sasuke killing him was unreal, they were best friends and it was almost impossible for Naruto to believe such a thing.

"Ok… I'll conference… hold on a minute." Sakura said, for she knew Sasuke, and he would never threaten her like that, would he? He wouldn't and she knew it, she just didn't trust herself when it came to that sort of thing. She switched over to line two and dialed Sasuke's number. Sakura was not in the mood to be the delivery owl for messages today. Sakura didn't notice that Sasuke had picked up because she was lost in her world of thought.

"Naruto if that's you I swear I'm going to…" he was really pissed and with his tone of voice, you could hear the venom of it seeping through his teeth, even over the phone. Seeing as how he had little sleep last night, he didn't want to be woken up at this time. He also knew that normally only Naruto would wake him up when he had his time alone on the weekends. The reply that he got surprised him to no end, why would Sakura call?

"Good its nice to see that someone agrees that six in the morning on a Saturday is too early to get called, but it's important." Sakura said almost laughing but at the same time, cutting Sasuke off. It was quite funny how he had answered the phone without even giving it a second thought as to who it would be, wait, the only person who calls anyone, normally, on a Saturday morning would be Naruto, no second thought was needed, she realized it right away.

"Um Sasuke, Naruto has something important to tell you, I need to put the phone on co… never mind, he's right… Stop it Naruto." She decided to make her Uchiha friend really angry because it was just for laughs. It was fun for her to have complete control over her team's emotions She decided the moment he picked up the phone with his venom voice that she would try to have fun with his anger and stretch it a little; it was what she did best. She was laughing her brains off when she heard Sasuke growl at her because he really did think that Naruto was at her house

His eyes widened at the last part of her sentence but he was not in the mood to show Sakura that she had goofed up his emotions. "Hn," was the only thing out of his mouth that he would allow, he didn't want to show Sakura that his blood was boiling with his jealousy. He hated Sakura's jokes, even if he knew it was a joke, he just wanted to make sure. He also knew that she knew that each time she played them, just to cheer her up, it got him each time.

"Jealous much Uchiha?" she asked with a slightly amused chuckle. "Im just kidding, Naruto's on the other line with his 'oh so important news'" she said really annoyed with the tidbit of information that she had received earlier. She heard Sasuke let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding in, then she giggled a bit more before flipping over to conference.

He was confused to what was now happening but it didn't last long because, without warning, she flipped over to conference and he, just so happened to, be greeted by the annoying blonde that he called a friend. "Hn" was all Sasuke let out of his mouth when he heard the dobe. He was not in the mood to talk to Naruto; his phone was for emergencies only, even though this could be considered an emergency. He, even with his team, was way too ANTISOCIAL and everyone seemed to know it. The weekends were the only two days off for him to be lazy and ignore the rest of his team. The weekends were the only time he was free, free of an overly obsessive Sakura and an overly annoying Naruto.

"So I hear that you have important news Uzumaki." Sasuke said, his voice flat. He didn't want important news from the loudmouth blonde today; it wasn't his favorite thing. He didn't even think that Naruto could have news worthy of his Uchiha ears. Unfortunately for him, this news was worthy of his ears, in fact it was vital information for the team and Sakura still didn't seem to know how it was physically possible.

Naruto started nodding his head on his side of the phone, which Sakura and Sasuke somehow figured that he was doing such thing because they just did. "Yeah teme, what she said, its GRRREEEAAATT news" Naruto stated almost jumping up and down in his seat. Sasuke started grumbling softly so Naruto couldn't hear it but Sakura heard his grumble and started to giggle at his irritability.

"And?" Sasuke wanted him to get on with it so he could get on with his life. He was still a bit angry with Sakura but he decided to pay her back later. He didn't want to wait much longer; for he was enjoying the silence of his own room before Sakura called. It was rare to have silence because two people in particular always interrupted it.

Naruto was pumped, too excited to actually speak at this time. This was making the Uchiha really angry. He was not in the mood to wait for Naruto because he had a need to talk to Sakura after Naruto hung up. Sasuke thought that he would go crazy if he didn't get his news that was so important that he had to wake up at six in the morning.

"Teme" Naruto almost jumped out of his seat from the excitement in the air of his apartment, "we are to have two new teammates, we meet them in an hour. Sasuke almost fell to the floor, he didn't want to train on Saturday but he figured he had no choice. "Oh and one of them is Jiraya's granddaughter" Naruto stated briefly. Sasuke was at this point overjoyed, well at least ecstatic. Right then, Naruto hung up without another word.

Sakura realized that Sasuke was not the least bit happy, neither was she, for Naruto had interrupted her sleep making her interrupt Sasuke's. Both Sakura and Sasuke saw the new teammates as more people to annoy them. Sakura continued where Naruto left off, "Jiraya thinks that we will benefit from the training" Sakura let out a sigh. At least to Sasuke, she was on his side of this mess.

Soon, Sakura was having a one sided conversation with Sasuke on how more training was too much for her to handle at this time, she hadn't really had any sleep and she was exhausted. Every now and then though, Sasuke would add a 'Hn' or two. To let her know that he was still listening to her.

Sasuke let out another 'Hn,' and Sakura immediately realized that something was wrong. She knew Sasuke well enough to understand his single syllable grunts that meant nothing to people who hadn't been around them. Sakura heard the motor of something on Sasuke's side of the phone and recognized it to be the humming of the fridge.

"Sasuke is something wrong?" Sakura asked through a worried voice. It wasn't like Sasuke to act this odd, even when on the phone. She waited for Sasuke to get what he needed out of the fridge because she had a way of knowing that his hand were full.

"Yeah, are we inferior?" this was the most amount of words that Sasuke had said all day. At this point, Sakura was in a state of shock, in all her years of knowing him had he ever attempted to have an ACTUAL conversation with her. Through her shock, she knew what Sasuke was headed at with his question.

"Uh… I donno," Sakura stated dumbfounded and shaking her head rapidly to get her out of the state of shock. Unfortunately not working as well as she had planned, no matter how hard she tried to snap out of it. The shock from Sasuke talking more than one sentence when it wasn't a vital situation wouldn't leave Sakura. "Uh, Sasuke, did something happen your not being yourself today?"

Sakura looked at the clock and realized that she was running dangerously close on time. She said bye to Sasuke and hung up without a second to spare. She knew that she had to clean her room when she got back but she was not in the mood for it right now. She gathered her clothes that lay on her bed and got ready.

She couldn't believe it she caught him. It was one of the few times since the massacre that he had held an almost normal conversation. Aside from becoming team seven and talking when he believed that it was necessary, this was a step up for him.

-With Sasuke-

How dare he, and why did I hold a normal, or somewhat normal conversation? Sasuke couldn't believe Jiraya, how could he benefit from more training, especially with people younger than them. He didn't see any possibility in it at all. It wasn't right, then he remembered something, it was Jiraya's granddaughter and he cousin that they are talking about.

Hmmm… because you like… cough … love her… his inner snickered at his reply. He was good and he knew that Sasuke was trying to avoid him. It wasn't working to Sasuke's plans though. For the first time in a while, Sasuke's inner had actually won. Woot!! His inner started to do a party/ happy dance, which was unusual for Sasuke.

I do not, Sasuke almost choked. He did NOT want to be bothered with this. He was having enough trouble as it was with getting a couple of new teammates, now his inner had to pop up. He was not in the mood to deal with the hormonal side of his inner, especially at a time like this.

Yes you do… if you didn't you wouldn't have had a normal conversation with her… it MEANS something. His inner responded hastily. Sasuke was in the mood for beating the annoying inner of his up at that moment. It wasn't helping him with his team problem any and he was getting really frustrated with it.

I do not love her Sasuke slurred the word love for extra emphasis. He wanted his inner to sleep, nothing less, so the mental conversation would be over. He wanted it to be over, his inner was killing him. He decided to turn his back on his inner and ignore it.

I'll see how long that lasts… DENIAL!! His inner chimed almost as if it knew that it was winning. The battle between them was set in stone; inner had won. Sasuke's pride refused to give into the inner; even if it was part of him, it was refusal. His inner started to laugh evilly with the sudden realization that Sasuke would never get rid of him.

I am not in denial, I don't love Sa-ku-ra nor do I even like her, she's an annoying little girl who has been obsessed with me since Konah Academy years. Sasuke snapped at his inner, he had finally been pushed up and over the edge. Even so, he knew his inner had a point, it was right. He still refused to believe so. Although somewhere in the deep depths of his mind, he knew his inner was right, but that was very deep down.

Oh… defensive now aren't we Sasuke… why so defensive? His inner was not going to let up anytime soon. His inner wanted to act like that fly that zooms around your head and bugs the heck out of people. It was enjoying bugging Sasuke: the Sasuke who was completely oblivious of his feelings toward others.

Sasuke growled at his inner out of anger making it laugh hysterically. He thought that he had just snapped at his inner with not getting defensive. Then, he realized that snapping at his inner meant that he was getting defensive. As soon as he realized it, his inner started laughing even harder, if that was even possible. He had let his inner win, hurting his pride, even though it was a fight with himself, it hurt his pride.

Sasuke realized that arguing with his inner wasn't getting anything anywhere. He looked at the time and decided that he would get ready; he didn't want to cause trouble. It wasn't like him to cause trouble, well maybe it was, but he would not be late to training, no matter how much he didn't want to go.

please review

if you don't like inner sasuke, i have good news

if you do like inner sasuke, i have bad news

he will be in later chapters for sure... just not this next one