Prologue
I was told that my body did not belong on this Earth…but I wondered why. I was told he was doing God a favor by hurting me…and maybe he was, how would I know? I was told I would never live a normal life for I am not a normal person, that I am a freak. I was told to die.
But now I wonder…am I all that different?
Sometimes I sit in front of an old, battered up mirror in the alley near this house. It looked just as used and abandoned as me. A distant kind of comfort. The cold concrete bringing a form of comfort; a reminder of a past time where my mom's cold hands would brush across my forehead as a fever raged though me. I would stare into it endlessly in the hopes that it could somehow tell me why I was different. But it never did.
Sometimes I look over the side of the school, from the schools rooftop, at the multitude of people going about their day and wonder what my life would be like if I could exchange our lives.
Would I have a loving dad instead of and abusive stepfather? Would I be able to call where I lived home? But maybe, most importantly, would I be told that I am loved?
Chapter 1
Why? I ask myself this every day. Why does he hurt me? Why doesn't my mom stop him? Why does no one see me for me? Why me?
Perhaps 'why me?' is a stupid question. If it wasn't me, it would be someone else. I can wait it out but someone else might not be able to. Besides, no one else deserves this pain. No one else should have to see the cruelty humans are capable of. I just need to wait a few years, save up some money and I can get an apartment far from here. I'll be safer on my own.
I looked over at my clock sitting innocently on a stack of worn books. It clearly stated that it was five 'till six; five minutes until it would sound an annoying beeping pattern that had the habit of waking Him. He would stumble out of bed to come punish me for waking him. Never mind that he had to get up at this time for work. I turn it off before it could sound and try to make my way to the closet.
It hurts. My ribs are no doubt cracked from his steel toed boots. My ankle is swollen from when I tripped running away from him. My knee is sore from when I fell to the ground after he kicked me behind my knee. My body hurts from the other things he has done that has left many bruises upon my soul. But I suck it up like I've been doing for so long and grab a random set of clothes from the closet.
I place my ear against the door to check for him before I leave what little safety my room gives me. I hear the whooshing of the air passing through the broken window in the bathroom across the hall. I hear the light ticking of the clock in kitchen. I strain my ears to hear the sound that brings a slight smile to my face – snoring. A sound that could only be caused by one thing - Him.
I make a break for the bathroom and quickly but quietly close the door. I finish getting ready, though there isn't much to do, before sneaking out of the house. I don't wish to be punished before school for walking too loudly, or whatever excuse he may come up with.
The walk to school doesn't take long and soon I am sitting in my first class early and alone. I wasn't like the others; I had no friends to hang with before classes started. I was completely the opposite of one Miss Kikyo Higurashi. Same last name but of no relation.
At least that is what she thinks. It is quite the dirty little secret I came upon while stealing a $20 from His secret stash in his closet. Apparently he wasn't as committed to my mother until after she married him and paid for his alcohol addiction. It's even screwier knowing he cheated on my mom with her sister, a snobby and older version of my mom.
A bell ring indicated that lollygaggers had five minutes to get to their first class. That was all the push the students needed to rush into their respective classes. And like every morning I watched as a group of girls took a section of the class for themselves and sat down while still carrying on a stupid conversation about which hair products worked best.
The teacher was leaning back in her chair looking completely uncaring that the bell to start class had just rung and the gaggle of girls were still yapping. But that behavior wasn't new to me. What was new to me was a girl looking no older than 12 coming through the door with a slip of paper. She had a happy atmosphere about her that was only reinforced by her choice of brightly colored clothing. She seemed like the type of person I have always dreamed I could be. Happy.
"Class, this is Takanashi, Rin," announced the teacher. "She is a late transfer student and I expect you all to treat her kindly."
With her looks and attitude, she'd be picked up by the popular crowd soon. Perhaps in a month I wouldn't even recognize her, she'd be ruined by them. It was at this moment that I realized the only space for her to sit is directly behind me. Maybe….maybe I could befriend her first?
A dull lecture later and the bell rang for class to end. On the way out of the classroom Rin stopped me with a gentle tap on my elbow.
"Um…," a blush forming on her cheeks, "could you help me find my next class?"
I don't know if it was her gentle touch or the smile that just formed but for once I felt like I might not always be alone in this world.
