Contest entry for the Happily Ever After TwiFic Contest

Title: A Peek Into Forever

Pairing: Bella/Edward

Rating: M for language and for hinting at adult situations.

Summary: A future take from BD pt. 2. Bella remembers moments of her life with Edward thus far and figures out what she wants to be 'when she grows up'.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything Twilight related…*sigh*


I sat by the lit fireplace with my love, his arms wrapped around me tightly…my mind a million miles away and here in the present moment – all at once.

If someone had told me when I was sixteen…nearly three hundred years ago…that the man of my most secret and passionate dreams would be as desperately addicted to me as I am to him…well, let's just say you'd have gotten a really rude look before I burst into fitful giggles.

Yet here we were.

Renesme and Jacob have been married for a very long time…Edward and his son in law were finally getting along – I was shocked that it took a few decades before Edward could stand to be in the same zip code as Jacob without wanting to rip his head off.

After Renesme and Jacob moved from the Cullen household to a small ranch on the reservation, Edward and I found ourselves behaving like newlyweds all over again.

Emmett has finally stopped his vicious jokes long ago after we started having Jasper project our lust to him in concentrated doses. His foul humor afterwards always made for a good time.

The past few years, we've distanced ourselves from our family to spend some quality time with one another…something that I've never regretted for a moment. Time alone with Edward was something I'll never get enough of.

Since my awakening as a newborn, Edward has opened up to me progressively – each new layer unfurling like a rose…every petal, flawless.

Every time I think I've seen all the sides to Edward there were to see, he disproves me and I fall harder for him.

Many things have changed since I woke up, nothing more surprising to me than my infinite ability for my heart and mind to expand – making room for all of the new information and feelings I acquire every day of my existence.

I know that if my heart were still beating, every beat would be for him, telling him everything he needed to know – my devotion, my trust, my adoration, my protectiveness, my lust, my eternal love for him.

He has always been everything I never knew I needed. With him I was better able to pull air into my lungs but I'd always been able to breathe better with him by my side. Without him, I was merely a shell of who I am – who I have the capability to be.

Edward never let a day go by without showing me his adulation for me. His touch spoke volumes of his reverence. No other has ever made me feel so cared for…it was impossible to feel any more loved that what I feel daily.

Although we don't sweat or really ever get dirty, he runs a warm, scented bath for me every evening before we go to bed. It's still funny to me that we go to bed…even though we can't sleep.

Some nights we make love long past when the sun rises high in the sky, others find us just staring into each other's eyes. We've even spent nights sharing memories, Edward verbally, me through his gift.

Edward never got tired of seeing my memories of our time together…even though seeing things through my mind left me unable to hide my feelings about each memory.

The memory of my take on our wedding was his favorite. Without being conceited, he loved seeing his anxious face in my mind. Meeting his eyes, I remember finding myself fighting the urge to hurtle myself down the aisle at him. Even then I was so in love with him. His ardent need for reassurance that I really did feel for him what I do was, at times, heartbreaking. He really never did see himself as clearly as I saw him.

He was perfect – an angel sent to me from a higher power that wanted me to be blissfully happy. If it weren't enough that his was the handsomest face I'd ever seen, his soul was beyond compare…his body absolute paradise.

I sighed contentedly as he held me from behind, running his nose along the smooth expanse of my throat.

I knew that his desire was making itself known to me as he began to hold me closer to him, his hands tightening on my hips.

As much as I loved his adoring touches, I wanted his rough touches just as much. Knowing now how much he held back when I was human gave me a new respect for my husband…the other half of my soul.

He most definitely took advantage of my readiness for less tender touches. It was as if he were able to finally show me with his touch how much he wants and needs me – with such intensity…the need for him was just as strong for me.

I was shocked into absolute stillness the first time he swore while we were roughly making love. I chuckled, caught in the memory of his startled eyes and stunned features while he waited in perfect silence for me to make a move…a noise…anything. I can still hear his voice in my head.

"Fuck baby…"

His chagrin was short lived, however, as soon as he realized that his talking like that only fueled my passion further for him.

We spent the next week making hard, fast, fanatical love. He spent most of the time uttering words that I'd never heard leave his lips before. It was our longest sexual streak…one streak that we try to outdo all the time.

Thinking about all of this, I hadn't realized that I'd let my shield slip and I heard Edward hiss out a breath before beginning to growl lowly against the flesh of my neck.

"Bella…my Bella…" he murmured seductively, "I'd know that you were thinking those naughty thoughts without being able to read your mind, love. You're positively drenched, my pet. You like thinking about me fucking you hard…"

I squirmed against him, relishing in the way his marble body yielded so easily to mine.

He pulled me back against me harshly, effectively stopping my movement all together.

As he kissed my neck, he whispered the word, "Forever…"

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Several hours and many broken possessions later, we finally broke apart, gasping haggardly for breath that we didn't need.

We had just gotten dressed when Edward turned toward me and smiled that crooked grin that I loved so much.

"Come," he beckoned me, "take a walk with me."

Unable to deny him anything…since he is always giving me so much…I took his hand and left our love nest.

Edward began pulling me towards the path that wound along a peaceful stream the length of our property.

I pushed down my internal glee, knowing that he remembered this path is my favorite among all the paths that crisscrossed all over the land. This path was the one he proposed to me for the fifth time on.

We had just moved onto the property. Taking a leisurely stroll along the banks of the rather large stream, he kept looking at me from the corner of his eye before dropping to one knee.

"Isabella Marie Cullen, although you're already mine for all eternity – marry me again? I love you more than the stars in the sky or the years we have before us. I love you with every ounce of my being…more every day even though the thought of that is so impossible to me. You've given me so much – a beautiful daughter, trust, a chance at the redemption of my soul, your unconditional love…and ultimately, your life. You've done so with finesse…never questioning, never hesitating to give me more – even all you have…and everything you are. I can never fully express exactly how much you mean to me…but I will never stop trying. Your life has always been connected to mine. I see that now. Everything that has happened up until the point in our lives when we met was just preparing us for each other. I know that you've given up everything to be with me and that you'd never stop sacrificing yourself for me. I'm eternally grateful for every gift you've bestowed upon me. Make me the happiest man on earth again…I want another vow reaffirmation ceremony to reiterate our deep, undying love for each other."

Of course I said yes. I'd have been an idiot not to.

He says I have given him so much but yet he foolishly believes our scales are unbalanced and that he can never do enough to repay me for being with him.

The ceremony was extravagant and beautiful.

Nothing less than what I'd come expect from my family.

Our vows were said under a full moon and a sky full of stars. Just as we shared our kiss as new man and wife (again), a few stars streaked across the sky. It was just as fairy tale perfect as our relationship had been so far.

Our joining that night was intense too. After we had gotten done, Edward cried silent, dry tears – clinging to me for dear life.

We walked quietly along the babbling water, hand in hand, lost in our own thoughts.

It was times like these I wished fervently that I had Edward's mind reading ability. There's not much in this world I wouldn't do to have a quick uncensored peek into the inner workings of his mind. He was getting so much better at telling me what was on his mind, no matter how it came out or how much anxiety he harbored about such topics.

I was insanely thankful that he was fully coming out of his shell with me. The rest of the family was rather happy too.

Carlisle had pulled me aside one evening about two hundred years after our wedding and told me how blessed the family feels to have me be a part of their forever.

I was truly the blessed one.

"Bella," Carlisle's voice came softly to me, "Would you please come up to my office for just a moment, I wanted to speak privately with you."

I was instantly uneasy – Carlisle's office being the only room in the house that was sound proofed for maximum privacy. I nervously began picking at my nails due to the anxiety I was feeling.

I walked in and sat down in the chair directly across from my father in law…more a father to me than Charlie had been, God rest his soul.

"Isabella," he started off slowly, "I wanted to take a moment while Edward was out of the house to speak with you. It seems he never leaves you long enough to have this conversation with me. For over a century I worried constantly about Edward. All of us were paired off and he just sat by and watched us, drowning in his grief and loneliness. No female – human or vampire alike – could catch his attention. Personally, I worried that I'd changed him far too early for him to make any mating connections. For the longest time, Esme actually thought he was gay…I guess what I'm trying to say is that we're extraordinarily thankful for you, Bella. You've filled out our family and our lives in the most humbling way possible. All of us received something special when you came to live with us…Esme and I got a beloved daughter…Emmett and Rose finally got a sister who can quickly and effectively put them in their place…Alice and Jasper, well, they've gotten a best friend whom they hold very dear to them. Any time you feel like you have no purpose…or if you were to ever get depressed, remember that we all love you – you are our family, Bella. Make no mistake about that. You were predestined to be an eternal part of this family."

I knew that if I had been human at that moment that I would have cried long and hard over his confession. I felt the familiar tightening of my throat as my eyes filled with invisible tears…tears that I would never shed.

I sniffled slightly, the emotions rendering me in small fits of dry tears.

I felt my mate stiffen beside me before stopping altogether as he heard the quiet noises I was making.

"Bella?" Edward's voice was ripe with tension, "What's the matter, love? What has you so upset? It wasn't anything I've done, right?"

I snorted a very unladylike snort.

"At what point," I giggled, "in your life will you begin to believe what I've been telling you all along? I'm a grown ass woman, Edward…and I do know how and when to tell you if you've done something rude, inconsiderate or just plain dumb. As long as you're not hearing it from me, you're okay. I swear to you – I got the sniffles from a happy memory. I was remembering the very first night Carlisle ever told me he was happy I entered all of your lives. Although I've never felt unwanted, I have never felt more like a part of the family then when Carlisle pulled me aside and told me all he did."

I hear the handsome man beside me make a noise dangerously close to a scoff in his throat, "You mean the night he told you my own mother thought I was gay because I didn't find any of the heathens they brought near me attractive?"

I rolled my eyes at his random use of the word heathen…some of the women were more like whores…but I digress.

I shook in silent laughter as he drew me into his arms, his muscled chest yielding to mine – a fact that I still marveled at, "Yep. That's the one."

I leaned back, tilting my head to look into his honey eyes.

My entertainment grew exponentially as I noticed the general dismay forming a crease in between his eyebrows.

"I never thought I was gay…"

His tone made the giggles come back with a vengeance. His melodic voice was almost as a child's, trying to make a point.

I dropped my head to his chest to muffle the laughter at the ludicrousness of our current discussion – I've never questioned his sexuality…only whether or not he found me attractive.

After the honeymoon, he showed me exactly how attractive he found me. There were even moments where I found myself rolling my eyes at the two of us.

I always found contempt in myself for those sickeningly sweet couples that were always touching, caressing and kissing each other.

I've found that I'm insanely happy (which is completely understandable with the sex god I was married to) with his seemingly never ending lust for my body…I'm even happier with mine for his. It was it's own entity…taking over all logical thought, feeling and movement.

I loved him despite everything he is…was…and everything he's not – though it seemed like the not was nonexistent. He was everything to me.

His entire family was.

My whole human life, I'd sat quietly on the sidelines – never making noise in spite of the fact that I was, at times, miserable being alone. I never really fully understood my place in the world. I never took into account that God had massive plans for me.

And those plans would never change.

There was one year I tried to think about how my life would have been had I not moved to dismal Forks Washington…I got depressed instantly thinking about how lonely I would have been. I couldn't imagine where I would have been without our family's love and support for us. It seemed that we could do anything – be anything in this life.

All of my options stretched out ahead of me and I found myself sifting through each option only after I worried it over and over in my mind for weeks. I debated on what I wanted to do with my life…did I want to be a doctor like Carlisle and Edward? Did I want to go into design like Esme and Alice? Did I want to go into more hands on careers like Rose and Emmett did? Or did I want to get my first degree in education like Jasper?

He's had his Master's Degree in historical education due to his intense love for every possibility in history.

I found myself leaning towards becoming an English Lit teacher. Reading had always been my favorite past time but I found myself really considering it for the first time. Could I, in fact, handle dealing with hundreds of children a day? What would I do if I heard an intruder come into the school?

With all of the school shootings that have been pretty widespread lately, I shied away from teaching as much as possible. I don't know exactly what would be made of a teacher who was shot by an intruder and didn't bleed or die. Of course, this imaginary situation was just that – imagined…Alice would see long before anything happened and we would take him out long before he made it inside or near any children with those guns.

I sighed deeply as I realized how confused about the future I was.

What do you do with a never ending amount of time spanning out before you?

I thought of just being a house wife for a few more hundred years but the thought left me cold.

Er, colder than usual…

A thought flew screaming at me from the furthest corner of my mind: Holy shit! I could be a writer!

I thought quickly through the options of topics I could write about…

Nonfiction…history…science fiction…horror…romance…

Romance!

Oh, my God! I could write a story based very loosely on my life with Edward…the early years and every perfect year after.

I smiled coyly at Edward. He raised his eyebrow at me, no doubt trying to penetrate my shield. I grinned and lifted my shield fast so that the thought would crash into his mind with such force he wouldn't be able to ignore it.

He thought seriously about the idea for a few long moments before nodding his head in my direction and kissed me fiercely.

I knew that if I were able to get my story out it would make people as happy as I am…give them hope for the future.

It was all due to my amazing family…and my awesome mate.

I love my life.


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