Title: "It's a gamble with gifts."
Rating: K+
Characters: America, France, with a hint of England.
Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or any of its characters. Nor do I own this joke.
A/N: This is a joke done by Jim Gaffigan. I just…had to write something using it. So go check him out, because he's hilarious.
Also, please don't expect much out of my first Hetalia fanfic.


"Good thing the statues beautiful, 'cause if it was ugly that would've been awkward…"

"Hey! Glad you could visit, man!" America waved, smile the brightest on the planet, as France walked up to his front door. England appeared behind his former little brother, peeved at how late France had been.

"About time, you got here."

"'ello, America! England! It has been too long, oui?"

"We're gonna' have an awesome time, dude. We're gonna' be doing it all this week – visiting Times Square, Partying in Nashville- everything!" America pumped his fists in the air. France couldn't help but smile at the other's delight. England rolled his eyes.

"Magnifique, mon ami. However, there is a sight in particular I wouldn't mind to see."

"…w-what is it?" America dreaded the answer he knew was coming.

"Well I must wonder, where is the statue of Liberty?" The younger nation's eye twitched. Oh shit.

"Oh…um…well, it is," America took a deep breath, "inthedesertinArizona!" He smiled awkwardly, tilting his head just so. France raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"…in Arizona?"

"Yeah, we…we thought it would really compliment the desert…"

"But I thought that New York was - "

"Oh, no! No, New York would have been a terrible place to put it. What with all the people and cars…and pigeons poopin' on it."

"…"

"…damn pigeons…"

"…"

"…poopin' everywhere and whatnot." England pinched the bridge of his nose.

"You should stop talking now."


"It would have been even more awkward if we regifted the statue…"

France stretched when he got off the plane, New York staring back at him from the large glass windows of the airport.

"Dude! France, over here!" Turning around France smiled and waved to his young friend. "How was your flight, man?"

"Oh, it was like any other. Thank you for inviting me to your home, America – I bet we'll have a fun time together, oui?" France placed an arm around the other in a moment of brotherly bonding. "But I must say, I was surprised when I arrived."

"Why's that?"

"I could have swore you said my gift would be erected right here, in New York. But it isn't here, mon ami." America gulped. "Tell me, where is the beautiful statue?"

"…"

"…"

"…Japan was having a birthday." America smiled, "And we just didn't know what to get him – we said that it was from both of us…so…"

"You regifted the statue of Liberty?!"

"Yeah and he just loves it, loves it, loves it."

"I hate you."

"I was prepared for that."


A/N: Yeah, I know this is stupid. But I feel better now that I got this piece of crap out of my system. XD I wrote them as being in modern times – but I now know that makes no sense since France would have noticed the statue missing a while before now…of course America could have thought of a few ways to distract him I guess.
This isn't my first fanfic, but it is my first HETALIA fic - hope it didn't suck too bad.