On very rare occasions, Organization XIII takes a group vacation. This is one of those days.
"ROXAS! Get your chores done or you can't come out with us!"
Roxas cringed as the voice echoes from several floors below him. Xemnas had ordered the Organization to go out for dinner, and wanted to make sure everyone came.
Of course, not everyone could come. The fact that the Castle Oblivion Members were gone meant that they were really Organization IX. This made Demyx quite happy.
Roxas frowned and muttered to himself, "Why would I want to go out to dinner with you all? You're public embarrassments."
"Now now, that's not very nice is it?"
Jumping a bit, Roxas looked up to see the familiar scarred face if Xigbar, who was of course hanging from the ceiling.
Shaking his head Roxas continued trying to drag the vacuum up the stairs, "Oh shut up. You know that this is going to end up being a disaster. Now can you help me with this vacuum?"
Glancing around the room, Xigbar pretended to hear someone, "Oh, listen to that. Xemnas is calling me. Got to go," Roxas tried to send a glare up at him, but the Free-Shooter was already gone, leaving a dark portal behind him.
Roxas sighed and pulled the heavy vacuum up another stair, when he heard the familiar sound of dirt spilling out the bottom. He groaned as he looked down and saw the mess which had poured out onto the staircase,
"Stupid vacuum, look what you did you piece of sh-"
"Geez, Roxas. Watch the mouth."
Roxas's head shot up and immediately saw the flaming red hair of Axel's, waving around ironically like fire from laughing.
"Don't laugh at me. Help me vacuum. I'm hungry and want to get this over with."
Taking his time, Axel walked down the stairs to the one where Roxas stood and looked at the mess he had made.
Axel looked over his shoulder and beckoned for a dusk with his hand,
"Sweep up the mess here, and then take this vacuum and clean."
Axel grinned and turned around to face Roxas again, "How easy was that? These little things can do everything."
He pointed at the dusk that was falling down several stairs due to his lack of proper hands to latch onto something.
Roxas shook his head and then looked back at his friend Axel, "The dusks don't listen to me. Well, they try but fail. I'd ask them to get me some Nutty Fudge from the kitchen, and they'd come back trying to give me Vexen. So I stopped trying to order them around."
Axel scratched the back of his head, "Well, that was probably my fault. Anyway there's no more Vexen to bring you. Come one, the dusks will do your chore. Let's head down so we can leave."
The two started down the stairs, with Roxas glancing over his shoulder to see several more dusks trying to pull the other one up the stairs again, only to fall down themselves.
Sometimes he really doubted what Axel had to say.
------
Xemnas sat at the entrance/exit of The Castle That Never Was, waiting for the rest of the Organization to gather there so they could leave.
He looked around him to see which members had come. Xigbar had just made a portal to the room, grinning as if he had just shot someone in the leg.
Xaldin sat there, stony-faced staring at the wall ahead of him, trying to land a lance in the center of a dart-board.
Loyal Saix, the first to arrive, sat on a bench across from Xemnas, calmly dodging Xigbar's bullets, which were fired at the X-shaped scar on his face.
Luxord was slumped over in a chair, obviously slightly drunk, but stable enough to understand what he and the people around him were saying.
Xion, sat in the corner, hood drawn over her face. She would stay solitary until her partners in crime came to corrupt her into their mischievous ways.
Xemnas sighed, taking away his attention from his tiny organization, and directing it back to Kingdom Hearts. He wondered if they would be able to achieve their goal, which such little members. They were still a very powerful organization, but the will and attention span of certain members were what worried him.
He didn't bother to turn his head when he heard a loud thump and a cry coming from the wall next to him.
Dismissing the fact that Saix had just thrown Xigbar into the wall, probably leaving a large crack, he took in a large breath, about to call the rest of the member into the room.
Luckily for Xemnas, he didn't have to waste any more air on them, as Axel, Roxas, and Demyx opened a portal into the room.
Standing up, he proceeded to the door,
"Follow me."
------
The arrival of nine men, cloaked in all black was sure to raise some heads.
However, nine men cloaked in black, two of which were one fire, one who was laughing, and one who seemed drunk, raised every head in the restaurant.
Ignoring the stares, Xemnas stepped up to the waiting booth,
"I have a reservation under 'Superior'."
The man standing at the counter froze for a moment when he saw Amber eyes staring out from under a hood, but managed to nod his head and slowly make his way to their table.
Making, a big commotion with who was sitting where, the Organization took a total of 23 minutes 28 seconds to sit down and pick up their menus.
The sad part is, they haven't even ordered their food yet.
-----
"Hello, my name is Shay, I'll be you're server for the night,"
Nine heads turned towards the irritated voice coming from the end of the table.
"Well, Hello-o Shay. You're looking fine," Xigbar grinned and ignored the glare coming from the waiter.
"Wait can I get you to drink, sir?" Eye twitching slighty, Shay picked up her waiter pad and flicked it open to a new page.
Xigbar slicked back his hair, not caring about the fact that this was considered pedophila, "It doesn't matter, cause you-"
"WHERE IS THE GOD *Bleep** WAITER!?!" Luxord yelled from the opposite end of the table, drunk and falling out of his seat.
A mother covered the ears of the children next to her, "Please refrain from using rude language."
"STOP YELLING AT ME!"
"Please excuse us, but certain people in our group may have trouble restraining themselves," The stony face of Saix apologized to the woman, while Luxord broke out into tears, clutching at the table which he blew his nose into. Standing up abrubtly, the woman ushered her children out the door, leaving as quickly as possible.
Trying not to throw something, Xemnas turned to Shay, "We'll pay for that. I would suggest getting just water for everyone."
Nodding, Shay wondered if she would get payed extra for this, and went to go get glasses of water for everyone.
-----
"Augh! I spilled my waiter!"
Roxas announced the accident and waved his hand around, attracting attention to himself.
"I'll clean it up," Demyx chirped and pulled out his Sitar to clean up the water.
"Number IX, I suggest not doing that so, publicly," A menacing glare was sent down the table, and hit Demyx right in the soul. Quietly, he put his Sitar away and sat still.
Shay rushed over to the table with napkins in hand, "I see you've made a mess," the corner of her mouth twitched, "Would you like a sippy-cup?"
Tilting his head to the side thoughtfully, Roxas considered the offer, "Hmmm, Nah. I'm good. I'd like another glass of water though."
Lifting up the soggy napkins, visibly disgusted, Shay traveled back into the kitchen.
Axel laughed and slapped him on the back grinning like and idiot, he leaned down to whisper into Roxas's ear, "Hey, when the waiter comes back, should I set her hair on fire?"
Backhanding him, Roxas shot a look at Axel, "Don't do that, she's getting me another water."
Xion spoke up quietly, "I kind of feel bad for coming and making her crazy."
Roxas nodded, and grinned happily, when he saw her coming back out of the kitchen.
She set down the water on the table frowning, "You're food will be coming up in just a minute."
Roxas sat there for a minute staring at his water shocked.
"Look Roxas, she put extra crack in yours!" Axel smirked at the clouded and discolored water, swirling around unappealingly in the glass.
From the other end of the table, the sickened voice of Xaldin spoke up, "I think that's used dishwater."
"Looks righty-dandy love, "Luxord said cross-eyed and hiccupping, then took the glass in one hand a downed it all.
The table was silent, trying to take in the grotesque scene of Luxord drinking the unknown liquid. Slowly, each face turned a pale green color.
"Whatever happens, I am not cleaning up after him," Saix scowled down the table at Luxord who seemed to have gotten an idea of what he drank.
Slowly turning white, Luxord muttered something about 'Parle', then fell face first on the table.
"I'm not carrying him home," Xaldin said, crossing his arms and shaking his head.
Xemnas glanced around the restaurant, noticing that everyone had left, due to the ruckus they were making, and summoned several dusks to take Luxord back home.
The dusks glided over to the unconscious man, and paused, wondering what to do. Then, two took his ankles, and dragged him out of his chair, head hitting the floor with a thunk. They then proceeded to roll him into a portal.
The last thing anyone heard from the mumbling Luxord that night was, "Lovely bunch of grape popsicles rolling me like a hippo."
-----
"Where's our waiter?" Xion asked looking around trying to figure out where she had been for the past 45 minutes.
"Maybe she died." Xigbar suggested, cleaning his gun with the tablecloth.
"Which waiter did we have anyway?" Xemnas asked to no one in particular, looking around the empty room for her.
"I'll stick a lance through her head when she comes back if you would like," Xaldin suggested, particularly angry because his food hadn't gotten to him yet.
"That's not necessary III," Xemnas stated warily, before looking up to see Shay walking back towards them, hands full, "I found our waiter."
Approaching the table as if it were hazardous waste, or a time-bomb, Shay set down the plates in front of the Organization.
"My apologies for the wait, but our head chef had some trouble, you see he has heart prob-"
Shay cut herself off, realizing that no one at the table was paying attention, as they were too busy shoving their faces with food, while the blue-haired man was yelling at them to use table manners.
Smiling evily, Shay retreated back to the kitchen to tell the manager and chefs about their plan's success.
-----
"Ugh, I'm full," Demyx said, grinning and patting his stomach happily, while the people around him nodded their head in agreement.
Standing up, and dropping the money onto the table, Xemnas beckoned with his hand for his members to follow him back home through a portal,
"Well, it could have been worse I guess. This time wasn't a total disaster."
Several cheers were heard from behind him, glad they hadn't been banned from this restaurant too.
With full bellies, and (mostly) happy faces, the Organization followed their leader through the portal to return home.
---
Shay peeked her head around the corner, watching as the last man walk through the mysterious black hole. Intrigued by this, she wondered if they were time-travelers, but was interrupted from thought when the people behind her cheered.
The chefs tossed their hats and aprons into the air, glad the nuisances were finally gone. Shay smiled happily and sank into the chair beside the manager.
A different waiter approached them curiously, "Manager sir, why did not ban them from ever coming back?
The manager smiled before breaking out into hysterical laughter, attracting the attention of everyone else.
"Although it may be illegal, we tampered with their food. Let's just say it made friends with my cat's tongue, and my rear end."
---
A.N.
Vexen is Nutty Fudge. Dusks are stupid. And Xemnas should never take them out for dinner at that restaurant ever again.
Might do some sort of sequel, dunno. Depends on what you guys think.
Well, I hope you enjoyed reading this!
I really have no idea where it and all it's insanity came from. I'm sorry if you've suffered any mental damage.
Organization XIII and dusks © Squeenix
Shay and others – made up completely on the spot.
This was based on a real-life situation at Eat N Park with my friends and me. No joke.
R and R if you'd like!
